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Recreational Drug: Something apparently taken by both those eighty-year-olds, as evidenced by their conversation, and those teens, who with seemingly no effort remain fit, trim and radiant. I want some.
And not a one of you got my Mother Nature allusion. I'm disappointed, lads, the wedding's off.
Bowdrill:
Bow drill: An instrument used to start a fire in primitive times which is why they didn’t smoke.
Smoke:
Smoke: Something I used to do, cigars, that is, but gave up for my health.
Fire:
Fire: Source of light, heat, and third degree burns caused by combustible materials, oxygen, and a spark
Combustible:
an easily broken comb.
television
Television : Another name for one-time seers. Because they can only tell-a-vision.
Seer
Seer: Someone with an ability to get information from the environment often that others lack.
Information:
Information: The act of putting on informal attire
Attire:
Attire: The round rubber things that connect a motor vehicle to the road.
Rubber:
Rubber: 1) match or deciding match 2) a galosh 3) prophylactic 4) substance that needs to be vulcanized to be of much use 5) fantasy/drama film http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/rubber/ 6) type of tree plant an ant can't move... but he's got high-igh hopes...
Drama:
Drama: A play or movie that isn’t funny enough to be a comedy.
Spark:
Spark: The usual beginning of a flame. It can be caused by something as simple as two rocks hitting together, flint and steel, striking a match, live electric wires crossing, flipping a cigarette butt, etc.
Flame:
Flame: A huge hit song by Cheap Trick which in the late 80s gave them the long-awaited comeback they'd been seeking. Oh, and this yellow-orange dancing thing that burns logs.
Trick:
Trick: 1) to deceive 2) service by a lady of the evening
Lady of the Evening:
Lady of the Evening: a poetic term for the moon
Necropolis
Necropolis: City of the dead. Population 10,000 zombies and Ash Williams
Zombie:
Zombie: Those that roam in large heards within your local mall. They are very slow and seem harmless at first but beware of their large numbers.
Strip Mall:
Strip mall: Something ugly and useless which has been used to pave over every bit of open land in 'Murica, every copse of trees, every expanse of tall grass, every green, quiet place. Their redundancy was always obvious, but so long as the developers could get rich quick putting them up, and were sure to pay off locals pols, no one complained. Now that we're on the verge of drone delivery, so that whatever limited reason for still having storefronts in the age of Amazon will become negligible, the lack of utility of these never-ending strip malls should be apparent to all. But won't be. Boy am I bitter. :-0
Redundancy:
Redundancy: Repetition
Repetition
Repetition: Repeating yourself and talking increasingly louder in the vague hope that if you say it enough and loud enough that man who speaks only Cantonese will suddenly learn English
Vague:
Vague: being the dominant quality of any policy speech given by a candidate during an election.
Knob:
Vague: 1) sight-rhyme for segue 2) Vague is a fashion and lifestyle magazine that is published monthly for the clueless 3) cloudy with a chance of fog
Segue
Hindsight: (Sigh): Sorry Tyrion Cheddar, I've been rather clueless on my gamesmanship lately. Have no idea how I fumbled this.
:tailor
Segue: Torture object created by piano teachers, it means that the next section is to be performed in the manner of the preceding section so that I don't drop from 4/4 time to something else. (Rulers are hard on the fingers when you get off rhythm!)
rhythm:
Rhythm: Something which I first learned as a drummer during my youth, and later with a girl.
Sun-Maid Tropical Dreams dried mango, 'cause I'm eating them:
Mango: The oblong, sweet fruit of a tropical tree that is tasty but which humorist and Miami resident Dave Barry says is responsible for a yard defiling condition known as "mango poop."
Defile:
Defile: To take something pure, decent and perfect and try to improve upon it.
Improvement:
Improvement: The thing which, when you're a person with poor balance like me and you make the mistake of trying to skateboard, you fall on with all the force gravity can exert, the side of your jaw connecting with it as though struck by a sledgehammer. Sorry, that's pavement. Improvement: what local activist committees do to your lovely small town, leaving signs gleefully taking credit for the wreckage.
Signage:
Signage: The things that block one's view of natural scenery. For example, there's a place I like to go that has pull-offs for some breath-taking views. People, knowing that hundreds pull over there every day have erected signs advertising this or that that can be seen clearly from the parking lots. Thank you, but if I wanted to see another McDonald's sign I could have stayed home an driven down Main Street...
Pull-Off:
Pull-Off: Now, Pendragon, there are so many places I could go with this, but as I've recently been warned to stay away from anything not PC-13, I'll take a detour right around them. Instead, I'll share what this term really means to me as a guitar player, and which gave me a frisson of glee when I read it up above, and that is a technique by which you use the third or fourth finger of the hand with which you push the strings down on the fretboard, to pull down on the string after fretting a note, thus creating another note. Blues, rock 'n' roll, hard rock, most modern forms of music would have had a dubious history without this technique.
Hammer-on:
Hammer-on:
1) U Can't Touch This / MC Hammer (Hammer-off: Too Legit To Quit)
2) 300 game (Hammer-off: sub-deuce)
3) 86.74 m (Hammer-off: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LXNWS5kJagU and variations thereof)
Bowling:
Bowling: What bowls tend to do when they are in the cupboard and out of sight.
PG-13:
PG-13: What would have been R when I was growing up. R is what rated X was back then. NC-17 is what was triple X back then. First thing you know, PG will replace G.
Silent Movie:
Silent Movie: 1) An arse bustingly funny movie by Mel Brooks, 2) the type of pre-Talkie black & white film which the aforementioned parodied.
Talkie:
Talkie: A widely acclaimed improvement on the silent movie unless you happen to be deaf.
Deaf:
Deaf: Inability to hear. It is both a medical condition (people may be born deaf or have their hearing permanently damaged in some way) and a mental one. For example there are those who hear only what they want to hear. We call that "convenient hearing"here. My grandfather suffered from this illness. He couldn't hear you talking face to face in the living room, but a whispered "When is he going home?" in my bedroom would have him madder than a hatter. My kids also had this illness, they couldn't hear me calling for them when they were only a couple dozen feet away, but they could hear "dinner time!"when they were a mile away. My daughter could hear the phone before it rang. Sheesh...
Sight:
Sight: 1) That one of the five senses wot lets you see things, 2) A place featuring loads of HTML, applets, and otherwise impressive technology, all for the purpose of presenting a load of codswallop, 3) A place where construction workers, and soon just a 3D printer, build a building.
Pendragon, it be funny you should tell that tale about your grandfather, as it relates to a thread I may soon be starting under the serious discussions thingy, so keep your eyes open.
Codswallop (if we've done that, substitute bilge, blarney or blatherskite)
Codswallop: Nonsense, blarney, bungo, bunk, crap, twattle, etc.
Smell:
Smell: That unfortunate sense which makes you aware of the 80 year olds even if you can't see them.
Irving Berlin:
Irving Berlin: The guy we have to blame for everyone being excited about a white Christmas and snow in general
Descartes:
Descartes: What the dessert carts are commonly called in fancy restaurants.
Restaurant: