non-vegetarianism - A practical theory which holds that one must do one's bit to maintain the food chain and thereby sustain ecological balance.
circumlocution
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non-vegetarianism - A practical theory which holds that one must do one's bit to maintain the food chain and thereby sustain ecological balance.
circumlocution
circumlocution Any movement that has you going around in circles as if you were on a Native American death walk. See Politics.
Vanity
Vanity: Excessive pride in one's recreational vehicle.
Haberdasher
Haberdasher (n.): A man who would sell you anything - even the clothes on his back!
Forklift
Forklift: Eating
Astronaut
Astronaut - proof not only that there's a God, but that he's particularly fond of facetious tabloid headline writers. There's no other explanation for the word lending itself to so many smirking variations.
Homemade Space Rocket is Astronuts!
Steak-Dinner Pill for Gastronauts!
AstroCourt! Judge Judy Beamed to Alien Galaxy!
Zero-Grav Olga gets Astronaughty!
Incidentally, God's pretty keen on rock lyricists too, which is why there are so mainy convenient rhymes available for adolescent songs - school/fool/rule, change/rearrange, boy/toy, honey/money and of course champagne/cocaine/pull a train/stick various parts of the body in garbage bags and dispose of them in some remote stretch of inhospitable and bleak terrain.
...er. Sorry. Where were we?
effervescence
Effervescence (1) - the fifth of the crazy, but completely natural light effects - phosphorescence, luminescence, fluorescence, iridescence, and, sadly, lastly, effervescence
Why sad? Why last?
Because the phenomena may only be experienced by the fortunate few synaesthetics amongst us (of which group I just so happen to belong - er, rainbows don't smell like you'd think they would, if you were wondering)
This was twisted by a marketing genius into a quality that may be contained in an aerated liquid form to be tasted as though you can see with your tongue
Though actually having been around for centuries in the form of champagne and ages in the form of natural spring water - it's only very recently that scientists have begun taking it seriously - why exactly they feel the need to take it seriously is the result of a miscommunication in an inter-office memo
The directive was actually to 'taste it - seriously' with the word 'refreshing' cut off due to a printing error and the word 'taste' rendered sufficiently illegible that it required interpretation - wrongly as it turns out
There is an artificially manufactured version of effervescence but as it's a bit pricey compared with the generic lemonade and ginger ale very few have heard it with their own noses and it is largely left on the supermarket shelf
See also poison gas, toxic fumes, greenhouse gas, mustard gas, Nazi nerve gas
Effervescence (2) - The type of personality disorder which sees the afflicted taste rainbows in everything, put sugar in their coffee, require continual stimulation through 'earbuds', feel the compulsion to rub their tummies up against furniture and strangers, and like words with 'gh' in them
If you find this person pm me immediately - they are extremely ferocious and should be removed from the party with tact, delicacy and deceit - whichever works...
Magazine
Magazine Written publication that used to contain stories and articles but now contains mostly advertisements and is a depository for endless "bill me latter" offers
Writer
Writer - Contrary to popular imagination, not actually one who writes
Actually it's one who has been published in some traditional form, for better or worse, for good or ill, for warp or weft, for profit or loss
see also 'MarkBastable' (or better yet ask him to explain the ropes)
MarkBastable
MarkBastable Mysterious poster of weird and wise sayings who apparently is a dead ringer for the Joker
Asylum
Asylum (1) - place where what is served is all that's left, left is write, write is black, black is Blake, Blake is Yeats, Yeats is in cake, cake is cream, cream is off, off is on, on is strange, strange rhymes with orange, orange is apples, apples is pears, pairs is threes, threes is fours, fours is easy, easy is hard, hard is soft, soft is solid, solid is liquid, liquid is lunch, lunch is dinner, dinner is served
Periodically the loonies overtake the place, but then the other loonies take it over from them, and then the other loonies take over from them, so it's never quite clear who's in charge, but it's one of the best parties in town
Asylum (2) - an imaginary land where there are no wars, no riots, no racism, no-one gets mugged, beat up for no reason, everyone has the same chance, all are equal - but at least the government appears to change hands fairly regularly (actually that last one might be a bit true...)
Democracy
Democracy Government of the people by people old enough to know better, and who can not remember a time when they weren't arrogant fools
Liberty
Liberty
a) An imposition that is to be taken.
b) The specious conceit that one might have something
to do with steering the life they are leasing.
How about some of our own words and definitions?
Destabilize: To let the horses out
Crystal set - to be a member of a hippie sect
That's no fun! You want to know how the next poster jumblifies the chosen word
Sectarian