Get it off your chest!

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Originally Posted by Lote-Tree

I think whatever anyone writes on the forum should not be taken seriously. Because we are all anonymous here. No one really knows us. It would be improper to be angry with an anonymous person that we know nothing about.

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Well, I respect your opinion, but I disagree. The way I feel about the forum is not a bunch of anonymous strangers, but more a sense of community. I have been a member here for a year and many others have been members for much longer than that. While we may not know each other in the sense that I know a person that I meet at school or work, I at least know some of the people a little bit. The way people communicate with each other, even in written form does reveal something of their personality.

I read a comment that seemed to me to have dismissed my contributions to the community and I was offended by that. Sure, whatever I contributed is no big deal, but I did take the time and care to at least try to be helpful.

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Originally Posted by kilted exile

**Ok, just going to vent here. Mainly cos I need to get it out my head. Dont feel any need to reply, and I will apologise up front in case any profanity makes its way in.**


I hate feeling helpless.

Some of you who have been here for a while will remember me posting about my younger brother previously, I have no desire in boring the rest of you by repeating it. It has been a couple of years now since the attack took place and I thought he was over most of it (still seeing the plastic surgeon on a fairly regular basis) at any rate he seemed fine. Over the last couple of months however he has regressed and is at times breaking down into tears or scared to be out at night with only one other person.

I am his older brother and I should be able to do something to make it easier or make him feel better, yet I dont have a fragging clue how!!! There are a few things I'd like to do - such as take a sledgehammer find the ######## and smash in their faces - however dont worry you wont see me appearing on the news any time soon, I am fully aware this would make the situation a thousand times worse, but it would make me feel a little better.

There is also a possibility that I may be moving halfway acroos the country for work, something I have to do for myself. It still feels like I am deserting me when he needs me though.

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Hey Kilted, I am sorry to read of your brother. As the others have said, it is difficult to be happy about a move for the better for yourself while your brother is still going through tough times. He is a lucky guy to have a brother so caring. You can still be supportive of him, despite the miles. He just needs to give himself a chance and all the moral support that you are already giving him. Well, best of luck for both of you, don't feel blue.... you are not deserting him, your heart is tied to his, from what I can tell, and that is not desertion. You will only be a phone call/Email away, and he could visit you, too! :)

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Originally Posted by kathycf

While we may not know each other in the sense that I know a person that I meet at school or work, I at least know some of the people a little bit. The way people communicate with each other, even in written form does reveal something of their personality.

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Good point.

But the sense of anoynimity gives one the ability to invent oneself a personality that is different from the real one?...and we can't be sure which is which?...they could be Trolls, WUMs etc...just a thought...

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I read a comment that seemed to me to have dismissed my contributions to the community and I was offended by that. Sure, whatever I contributed is no big deal, but I did take the time and care to at least try to be helpful.

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I understand.

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Originally Posted by Lote-Tree

Good point.

But the sense of anoynimity gives one the ability to invent oneself a personality that is different from the real one?...and we can't be sure which is which?...they could be Trolls, WUMs etc...just a thought...



I understand.

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No Lote... I think that even if one tried to invent a persona here, they'd dump it after a while after they see how much of a comunity is here. They too would want to be a part of it. (unless you have an alter ego of a fairy!:p Which is just for fun!)

For me and i'm sure Kathy is feels the same, i feel more like myself here, and that i can let myself go here with out the fear of being mocked and teased! Trust me i wouldnt openly admit i write poetry to most of the people i know. Here you can tell the words and they'd listen!:)

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Originally Posted by Niamh

No Lote... I think that even if one tried to invent a persona here, they'd dump it after a while after they see how much of a comunity is here.

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You don't think budding Thespians may try their skills here? - this is after all Literature forum - where you discuss literary Characters - and characters are very important arn't they? - and if they could fool anyone here - they are indeed excellent actors. Perhaps even Web-robot and Artificial Intelligence programmers may ply their brilliance here? :-) - but I am just teasing you... I understand what you say. The sense of community and all that. What I was trying to say is that there are more important thing in life than to be annoyed by what somone writes on a forum...perhaps I say this because I don't get annoyed that easily. But it was not like this of course. One learns to control one's emotion until it becomes subservient to oneself rather than it controlling you...

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They too would want to be a part of it. (unless you have an alter ego of a fairy!:p Which is just for fun!)

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Ego is indeed a problem - but Ego of Fairies - hum...I don't know...perhaps a Sith Lord? :-)

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For me and i'm sure Kathy is feels the same, i feel more like myself here, and that i can let myself go here with out the fear of being mocked and teased!

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I agree that respect is important. And if one was maliciously mocking and teasing - it would break the forum rules or something.

But little witty amusing teasing Niamh -would that be tolerable? :-)

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Trust me i wouldnt openly admit i write poetry to most of the people i know. Here you can tell the words and they'd listen!:)

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Publish and be damned as the saying goes...we should be little prepared for that Damnation Niamh... :-)

Perhaps I should too publish and be damned :-)

Regards,
Lote.

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Originally Posted by Lote-Tree

What I was trying to say is that there are more important thing in life than to be annoyed by what somone writes on a forum...

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A but thats the thing...this forum has a way of beconing part of your life so something someone writes can annoy you. Heck its happened to me a few times! Athough if i dont agree with something i'll say it... which means i have potentally hurt a few peoples feelings.

the reason why i started this thread is so that we can get those annoyances off our chests, whether its forum related or personal related. Or if you feel guilty because you feel like you have hurt someones feelings in a thread you can appologise here.:)

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Originally Posted by Lote-Tree

. Perhaps even Web-robot and Artificial Intelligence programmers may ply their brilliance here? :-) - but I am just teasing you... I understand what you say.

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Have you ever seen posts by a web bot? At another forum I belong to such devises are employed to post spam and the way they operate is to put random words and phrases together in order to "fool" readers into thinking their post is somehow legitimate. Then they usually embed links to a pornograhic website as part of this "legitimate" post. So it ends up looking kind of like this:

Lucky dishes, one way street soap denim. Fiddle tunafish poetry whooshing? www.>>>>>>>>>.com

Would that be an "alter ego" I would run across here?

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Originally Posted by Lote-Tree

The sense of community and all that. What I was trying to say is that there are more important thing in life than to be annoyed by what somone writes on a forum...perhaps I say this because I don't get annoyed that easily. But it was not like this of course. One learns to control one's emotion until it becomes subservient to oneself rather than it controlling you...

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While this statement may be well meaning in intent it comes across extraordinarily patronizing. Maybe I DON'T have more important things in life to get upset about...maybe I used to consider spending time here to be an important part of my life because I don't have a life? Maybe I am incredibly ill, thusly stuck at home most of the time and coming here used to mean quite a lot to me?

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Originally Posted by kathycf

Have you ever seen posts by a web bot? At another forum I belong to such devises are employed to post spam and the way they operate is to put random words and phrases together in order to "fool" readers into thinking their post is somehow legitimate. Then they usually embed links to a pornograhic website as part of this "legitimate" post. So it ends up looking kind of like this:

Lucky dishes, one way street soap denim. Fiddle tunafish poetry whooshing? www.>>>>>>>>>.com

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I was only teasing about the web-robot :-)

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While this statement may be well meaning in intent it comes across extraordinarily patronizing.

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It is not. It is an alternate view-point. We should try not to be led by our emotions - we should learn to control it :-)

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Maybe I DON'T have more important things in life to get upset about...

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I see, then perhaps you right to be annoyed here.

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maybe I used to consider spending time here to be an important part of my life because I don't have a life?

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I find it hard to believe a forum can take over someone's life. Then perhaps even lesser thing have taken over people's life - like slug breeding or something :-)

Kath I realise now how seriously you take this forum. So take my words back.

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Maybe I am incredibly ill, thusly stuck at home most of the time and coming here used to mean quite a lot to me?

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This is a good point you make.

Go in peace Kath,
Regards,
Lote

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Originally Posted by Lote-Tree

It would be improper to be angry with an anonymous person that we know nothing about.

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Originally Posted by Lote-Tree

One learns to control one's emotion until it becomes subservient to oneself rather than it controlling you...

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Well, perhaps I am looking at these remarks out of context, but I expressed that I was upset. You come along and tell me I am "improper" to feel that way and that my emotions are out of control. By saying "One learns to control...excetera" well, if there was another meaning you meant with that besides implying that I am emotionally out of control, I would be glad to read it. I am quite sorry I even expressed that I was upset to begin with. Now I am in the position (albeit self imposed) to have to defend my right to be upset in the first place.

I think it is easy to sometimes misunderstand nuances of a post, so I apologize if I am misunderstanding here. I tend to react rather defensively to people telling me "oh get over it, your feelings are just wrong". I know you are being far too courteous to simply say "get over it" and I appreciate that, but I would like to say that is how it felt to me. On reflection, I am quite possibly wrong about that...I am often unbelievably wrong about a great deal of things, and I am for better or worse an emotional person.

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Originally Posted by Lote-Tree

I find it hard to believe a forum can take over someone's life. Then perhaps even lesser thing have taken over people's life - like slug breeding or something

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I did not state the forum took over my life. I said it was an important part of my life. There is a difference. A "part is not a "whole".
I can't speak for slugbreeders...unless I am mistaken and slugs communicate in some sort of meaningful way comparing forum use and slugbreeding is somewhat of a long stretch. I get that you are making the reference joking with the smiley face, but the fact remains that just because you don't think of something as important doesn't mean that it isn't important to somebody else.

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Kath I realise now how seriously you take this forum. So take my words back.

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I do understand that I take it too seriously. If you remember, I initially expressed a concern that I was getting too emotionally involved with this forum. Since it is quite difficult for me to maintain social contact with people otherwise, it creates a bit of a dilemna for me.

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Go in peace Kath,
Regards,
Lote

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Thank you. The same to you. :) I understand you are trying to be helpful and I appreciate that, just as much as I appreciated the comments from Niamh and Madhuri. No hard feelings, I hope.

Okay, I've been reading for years that the top 1% or 10% are making oodles of money and the lower 40% (definitely me) gain about .005% upward income annually. Instead of the rich folks forming foundations, sending millions and millions here and there, and bragging about it on t.v., why don't they raise the base pay of their standard line workers? "I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take it any more."

can i just make a note for anyone posting on this thread. Choose your words carefully when replying as punctuation and grammer can have the same effect as body language. We are all human and have feelings.

oK, I admit I'm nosy but i'm bored anyways, this is a thread for Ranting!!! Say whatever you want, when you want it, for example how was your day or who do hate or stuff! Go on be creative!!! And more importanlty Rant!



Luv,


Jin

I want the crown of the English Queen as my birthday present~~~~~~

oooh sparkly! I want a million books AND a camera!!!!