Legal: Any type of lying, cheating or swindling actions that your lawyer says you can get away with.
Cynic:
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Legal: Any type of lying, cheating or swindling actions that your lawyer says you can get away with.
Cynic:
Cynic: A critic in a bad mood.
Critic:
Critic: A Cretan who finds living there repulsive.
Cyrillic:
Cyrillic: noting or pertaining to a script derived from Greek uncials and traditionally supposed to have been invented by St. Cyril, for the writing of Russian, Bulgarian, Serbian, and some non-Slavic languages of Central Asia. As I cannot read any of them, they are all Greek to me!
Politically Correct:
Politically Correct: Not being able to call a spade a spade, let alone an effing shovel.
Sense of humor:
Sense of humor: A rarity, although they used to be quite common, sarcastic wit being one of the species of a sense of humor I dearly loved. Nowadays, when you have be so careful about saying ANYTHING, a sense of humor is not given the hilarity it deserves...
Speech Police:
:lol:Quote:
Originally Posted by mona amon
You mean speech paternalistic oppressor, hater.Quote:
Originally Posted by Pendragon
Speech
Speech: What one’s mouth does when it’s running.
Speech Police: The dog catchers paid to chase running mouths.
Mouth:
Mouth: the way the English write moth.
Cocoon
Cocoon: A privacy covering used by some insects to hide their metamorphoses.
Snarky:
Snarky: Lewis Carroll's attitude while hunting
Attitude
Attitude: Once you've figured out your latitude and longitude, you know exactly where you're attitude.
Atlas:
Atlas: The guy back in ancient times who literally had the world on his shoulders
@Pompey Bum: Me a hater? Mais non, ami!
Text Message:
txt msg: gr8 new literary form using abbreviations, emoticons, acronyms, lack of punctuation and most important, brevity and economy of style.
Abbreviation:
Abbreviation: A shorter way of saying something that didn’t need to be said at all.
Dearly Beloved:
Dearly Beloved: Phase uttered by the person officiating at a wedding to add the pretense that everyone there is actually held in high esteem, even the third cousins twice removed that showed up drunk and without an invitation and have the bride gripping her bouquet tight enough to make her fingers white
Ring Bearer: (Please not Bilbo, Frodo, or Sam!)
Ring Bearer: Besides Frodo, this is usually a young boy, about the size of Frodo, who carries the rings for the bride and groom on a white cushion marching up the aisle after them and since one can’t trust such children with real rings, let alone the one that rules them all, they are often fake but the kids don’t know it and for those couples who postpone weddings until the very last minute this could be by the time they get around to it one of their own children.
Flower girl:
Flower girl: Cute little girl who litters the aisle with flower petals before the bride enters. Also the precocious little imp who gets into a pushing contest with the ring bearer during photos of the wedding
Matron of Honor:
Matron of Honor: The woman who stands up for the bride when she can't get one Maid to order.
Groomsman
Groomsman: On the the groom’s male attendants at a wedding who make sure the bride doesn’t pull a fast one.
Pull a fast one:
Pull a fast one: It happens to all men occasionally and is nothing to worry about.
trump:
Trump: The power of doing business in the right suit.
Loch Ness monster
Loch Ness monster: A beloved sea monster who hasn’t harmed anyone since first being reported.
Unicorn:
Are you sure that's not Cecil and Beanie? ;-)Quote:
Originally Posted by YesNo
Loch Ness monster: the fake in the lake.
Unicorn: a creature only seen in the company of virgins, which has got to tell you something about the prevalence of virginity..
Dionysus
Good one, Pompey! :DQuote:
Originally Posted by Pompey Bum
Dionysus: The God of Wine and Drunkenness, worshiped everywhere in pubs, gin-joints, bars, nightclubs, beer joints, many restaurants (some of extreme high quality!) or at home with the TV and a six-pack.
Ghost:
Ghost: a psychic phenomenon remarkably like a shadow except that it doesn't exist.
Ouija board
Ouija board: Marketed as a "game" this innocent seeming parlor trick has been known to cause bad things, even if they are only in the mind of the person that suffers. The old saying is: "Call up no more devils than you are able to put back down." Trying to contact the dead or other spirits is frankly stupid, and best left alone.
Medium:
Medium: What the ether was supposed to be until they figured it couldn’t be there and went back to the drawing board.
Scat (as in bear scat or wood ape scat or Bigfoot scat):
Scat: Feces of some animal you are trying to track or hunt. It is also known as "sign:" as in "I saw some deer sign in that clearing over 'cross the creek." If you step in it, it is called "cutting your foot" and means you will be laughed right out of hunting camp!
Spoor:
Spoor: Evidence left by something you have been hunting, and perhaps getting excited by chasing, but which you can’t yet get your hands on. The next best thing to a bird in the hand.
Dark matter:
Dark matter: a hypothetical form of matter invisible to electromagnetic radiation, postulated to account for gravitational forces observed in the universe. To put it in layman's terms: "An intelligent sounding excuse for why something happens when you do not have a clue."
Theory:
Theory: What you can rely on when practice isn’t working.
Gonna Get Ya:
Gonna Get Ya: Threat uttered by those too weak or too scared to take one on at the moment. Unfortunately, nowadays, they often follow through with a loaded gun...
Road Rage:
Road Rage: An over-exercising of the mouth and the middle fingers temporarily forgetting that one is driving a vehicle and perhaps miscalculating that the guy who is being so annoying also forget to bring his favorite weapon along.
Market crash:
Market crash: Things that have caused my wife's 401K investment package to loose $2,000 so far. So China is devaluing their money. It would affect less Americans if the greed of the 1% hadn't shipped a lot of our jobs over there...
Self-fulfilling Prophecy:
Market crash: An accident in a mall parking lot.
Correction:
Self-fulfilling Prophecy: Me predicting that I am going to eat ice cream, and then opening the freezer to get some.Quote:
Originally Posted by Pendragon
Meditation
Correction:
1) A market crash that stops at some point above zero.
2) The supposed benefit of a good butt-kicking.
3) An institution for those who thought the butt-kicking wasn't a bad idea.
Meditation: Staring at one’s navel until it falls off.
Navel:
Navel: One's belly button, the contemplation of which is supposedly very relaxing. Why it should differ from say, one's big toe, I haven't a clue.
Boisterous:
Whoops, didn't mean to skip you up above, Pen.
Boisterous: A somewhat louder exuberance than girlsterous.
Filament