I think you head North
Whats the best route to Australia?
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I think you head North
Whats the best route to Australia?
Walking out Maryd's back door,
Why do we stay up sooooo late on litnet
Because we can't tell the time yet.
Why is there 24hrs in one day?
coz 25hrs would be still less!
why don't we have enough friends?
Because good friends are only on-line
Why are we chatting on a literature forum?
coz chatting is allowed on LIT NEt ;)
What are dreams made up of?
Little people in our heads... With little voices... Or is that insanity. Never mind.
What will happen to the world in 2012?
in 2012 the world will remain round since you have planted lettuce in the backyard!
Is that telephone going to ring!
That depends whether the batteries charged or not.
What's the weather like in India?
The same as the North Pole's
What is the weather like in Australia?
Depends on the number of kangaroos in your area.
Why do we watch television?
Because the stupid thing is in front of the window...
Why do you - watch television?
Because it makes my nausea of boredom even worse...
What are sausages made from?
You don't want to know.
Shall I walk my hot dog?
No...let him rest and cool off!!
Are children REALLY innocent?
No, they're guilty of being innocent.
Are adults really grownups?
No...I'm growing 'OUT' more than anything...(but really, I have ALWAYS worn a size 32 waist)
Why do we say 'one mouse, two mice'...but we don't say 'one house, two hice'?
It's the other way round. It should have been two mouses.
The driving speed limit is 65 mph. Does that apply to me too?
No, you have to go as fast as you like, you are Thelma
Is it right to rob a bank?
Can I answer with another question?..."Is it right for a bank to rob you?
Why do men only have one day to shop for Christmas?
Because they are forgetful and forget what day Christmas day is.
Why do men exist?
To give women purpose...(like to pick up socks and stuff)...
Why do men and women fight so much?
Because women are perfect in every way and men can't handle that. (Sorry dear, just had to throw that one in)
Why do women wear dress?
To attract men.
Why are men attracted to a sexy little dress...just to get the wife home and .....well?
Because men are not perfect (Sorry had to throw that one in again)
What is the difference between men and women?
Men are honest about their imperfection, while women fear them.
How big does a spider have to be to eat a bird?
He has to be a woman (hahahaha)
How many men does it take to change a lightbulb?
Just one after his wife nags him for two weeks.
What kind of birds does a spider eat?
Ones with feathers and wings.
How many women does it take to change a light bulb?
zero. Women just get the men to do it for them
How many women does it take to change one man?
O again, they never change.
How many women does it take to clean house?
A whole bunch if they for some reason work for a famous disc jockey.
What is a man's favourite saying?
A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.
What is a woman's favourite saying?
I'm going shopping
Is the moon made of blue cheese and is it edible?
Yes of course... Everybody knows that.
Would one need sunscreen, to sunbake on the sun.
nope, just some cake icing.
Do I have to put sand in my sandals?
Of course otherwise they would be called Shoeals.
If you swim in a pool will you get eaten by sharks?
there are no sharks in the swimming pool, just killer whales.
Who will win, you or a mosquito?
A mosquito... They always do.
Who hits the ball in baseball?
The base.
Is it ok to pinch a pinch hitter?