...well, I suppose she might have forsite enough to realize that we would squable over who gets to drive (and be Mr. T).:D
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...well, I suppose she might have forsite enough to realize that we would squable over who gets to drive (and be Mr. T).:D
A member belongs to the MASCULUM HOMINEM or the League of Ordinary:D Men's kind ,holds this conversation with his wife:
WIFE: "What would you do if I died? Would you get married again?"
HUSBAND: "Definitely not!"
WIFE: "Why not - don't you like being married?"
HUSBAND: "Of course I do."
WIFE: "Then why wouldn't you remarry?"
HUSBAND: "Okay, I'd get married again."
WIFE: "You would? (with a hurtful look on her face)."
HUSBAND: (makes audible groan).
WIFE: "Would you sleep with her in our bed?"
HUSBAND: "Where else would we sleep?"
WIFE: "Would you replace my pictures with hers?"
HUSBAND: "That would seem like the proper thing to do."
WIFE: "Would you buy her a pet?
HUSBAND: "If she wanted one."
WIFE: "Would you buy her a cat?
HUSBAND: "No, she likes German Shepherds."
WIFE: - - - SILENCE - -
HUSBAND: "****!"
loooooooooooooool
Moooooving right along, we are not gonna justify the above with a response:p and we certainly don't take digs at the lovely ladies(with beautiful sandles on)
*smirk*
*BREAKING IN!*
sorry, just felt like doing that. carry on with the maleness. :D
*breaking out*
Will people stop breaking in? IM trying to watch this thread develop as a study of what exactly it is males talk about.... now where was my popcorn?
:D :p
:lol: :lol: Are we entertaining you?Quote:
Originally Posted by Nightshade
*Makes mental note to carry a copy of Pride & Prejudice (or similar sentimental claptrap) around constantly*Quote:
Originally Posted by optimisticnad
I thought that was obvious, we discuss sport, cars and women; but not necessarily in that order. The real questions which deserve study are:Quote:
Originally Posted by Nightshade
1) How can we manage to keep women from planning tasks for us during important sporting events?
2) How do we stop TV channels from showing soap operas and decorating shows?
3) Where is the best place to hide from an angry woman?
4) What is the best excuse to use for stumbling home drunk at 4:30 in the morning with only one shoe?
So men actually talk? I thought when women weren't around they just sort of grunted at each other....:p (Kidding! I am kidding! :lol: )
What men really mean in 18 easy steps:
1. "I'M GOING FISHING"
Translated: I'm going to drink myself dangerously stupid, and sit in a boat with a stick in my hand, while the fish swim by in complete safety."
2. "IT'S A GUY THING"
Translated: There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical".
3. "CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?"
Translated: "Why isn't it already on the table?"
4. "UH HUH, SURE HONEY," or, "YES, DEAR."
Translated: Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.
5. "IT WOULD TAKE TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN"
Translated: "I haven't the foggiest."
6. "I WAS LISTENING TO YOU. IT'S JUST .. . . I HAVE LOTS OF THINGS ON MY MIND."
Translated: "Is that woman over there wearing a bra?"
7. "TAKE A BREAK HONEY, YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD".
Translated: "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."
8. "THAT'S INTERESTING, DEAR."
Translated: "Are you still talking?"
9. "YOU KNOW HOW BAD MY MEMORY IS."
Translated: "I remember the theme song to "F-Troop," the address of the first girl I ever kissed, the license plate numbers of every car I've had, I just forgot your birthday."
10. "I DUNNO . . .. I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT YOU, AND I GOT YOU THESE ROSES. . .."
Translated: "The girl selling them on the corner was a real babe."
11. "OH, DON'T FUSS. I JUST CUT MYSELF, IT'S NO BIG DEAL."
Translated: "I've severed a limb, but I'll bleed to death before I admit that I'm hurt.
12. "I'VE GOT MY REASONS FOR WHAT I'M DOING".
Translated: ". . . and I sure hope I think of some soon."
13. "I CAN'T FIND IT."
Translated: "It didn't fall into my out-stretched hands, so I'm completely clueless."
14. "WHAT DID I DO THIS TIME?"
Translated: "What did you catch me at?"
15. "I HEARD YOU."
Translated: "I have no idea what you just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't find it out."
16. "YOU KNOW I COULD NEVER LOVE ANYONE ELSE."
Translated: "I am used to the way you yell at me, and I realize it could be worse."
17. "YOU LOOK TERRIFIC." '
Translated: "Oh God, please don't try on MORE clothes."
18. "I'M NOT LOST. I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE WE ARE."
Translated: "No one will ever see us alive again."
*grunt snort grunt grunt* oops...sorry, there be females around...:D :DQuote:
Originally Posted by kathycf
oh man... that reminds me of what my gf said I am like.
Quote:
Originally Posted by kilted exile
or...How do they know that you have done something horrible (by accident of course) like raze the dead, or blow up the car, or the like...regardless of how good ones poker face is?
...and how on earth can they tell you snuck a look at another female...even if they are facing the other direction and are totoally focused on their task?
humm no that would clash with the beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeautiful blue car and theyd end up canciling each other out by the law of too good to be true.Quote:
Originally Posted by kilted exile
sky sport ...Quote:
2) How do we stop TV channels from showing soap operas and decorating shows?
antenna:pQuote:
Originally Posted by Stanislaw
girls,aren't the guy's thread progressing coz of us?let's leave them and see what are they going to talk about?it'll be really boring thread:p
Yes girls. :D Can't you just allow us guys to sit in a circle and argue over who is the prettiest girl while we nurse on a beer bottle? ;)Quote:
Originally Posted by miss tenderness
:D
rememebr , I really care for you Virg:D:D
Miss T, you were going to be my pick. :DQuote:
Originally Posted by miss tenderness
smart boy:D maybe I'll pick u when we(in our private section)make a competion as to who is the guy that u mostly like!
I assure u ,I will never allow an age competion!:p