Pam

Pam tried to do a hand stand, but he was knocked out by his belly.

PAM collects his Belly lint and is knitting a sweater.

Pam couldn't play hide and seek as a child because the other kids never bothered to look for her.

When Pam plays hide and seek, he is usually wearing overalls with broad arrows printed on them, and his playmates use bloodhounds. I suspect that the ball and chain probably hampers him a bit...

The only way Pam is going to get laid is to crawl up a chicken and wait.

I think I'll pass on that one. I wouldn't want my peaceful meditations to be disturbed by Pam grabbing the chicken and violating it whilst on the run from bloodhounds :D

If Pam's brain were chocolate, it wouldn't fill an M&M.

That, of course, would depend on the size of the M&M...

Pam acquired his social skills from the local chapter of Hells Angels.

PAM wears granny panties.

Pam hangs around battlefields and offers the righteous dead a lift to Valhalla.

Pam's mirror is looking for a new job.

PAM used to be the main attraction in the Jim Rose Circus sideshow.

Pam is a role model for bearded ladies everywhere.

PAM has a thang for bearded ladies.

Pam shaves between her eyebrows.