Sorry I missed this Haunted... My thoughts are with you. Mwah
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Sorry I missed this Haunted... My thoughts are with you. Mwah
That is a very special poem...it was marvelous...
Maybe cats that are in heaven are able to read?
Mary, so kind. mwah.
Bien, my cats read even when they were in this world, they pore over things I'm reading at the moment, books, junk mail, maps (especially maps). And they can speed read. They get done with their reading awfully quick, then without moving off their reading material they start taking a nap. I don't like to think that they went to heaven, sounds so far. They're just in a different dimension. I still hear/see them occasionally. Nik knows :)
Yes, Haunted, you know my beliefs on it. :)
You catch them in the corner of your eye, at the very edge of your vision.
Your eye knows that they should be there, and it sees them, long after
they are gone. I feel your loss Haunted, I am sorry...peace...
Hack, your words touched my heart. I do, I really do..... *tears*
This is previously posted as a contest entry, otherwise known as recycled trash.
existence
i am a globe
of zapping blue lights
in the expanse of space
looking foward to when
the electromagnetic shell
bursts and blasts every
living atom in this orb
into magnificent
oblivion
A lovely blue bauble of creativity.
Oh dear Haunted, I love this one. Mwah.
Love the use of the colour as well. Nice one
xoxo
Very imaginative, like Mary, I loved the use of colour, and the shape. Nic one.
thanks guys, but I love Hill's winning entry more :)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Haunted
I tried--Lord knows how
I tried--to square the
circle, using the same
amount of space as in
your clever “orb,” but,
look: I came close, but
couldn’t do it. So, now
shamefully, I concede.
Thanks for the nudge in the ribs Haunted - I hadn't noticed judging was over!
Yours still stands out as a work of beauty.
H
A beautiful bauble (nods at Hill) that you should write anew at christmas and I will cut it out and hang on the tree.
Now wheres that bath poem .....
jerry
oohh the bath poem, forgot again. I'll get on it. I"ll do a Christmas version if I remember...
Hill, didn't mean to spoil the surprise! Yours is the finest, most elegant minimalist poetry of the round. To steal some of the limelight if I may, I'm giving myself the Best Color Award :wink5:
Prince....may I?
(sorry I had to sacrifice the opening repetition...)
Lord knows how hard
I tried— to square the
circle, using the same
amount of space as in
your clever "orb" but,
look: I came close but
couldn’t do it. So, now
shamefully, I concede.
:D
Oh, but you did a better job than I did at creating a square, although I think it now lack the exact number of pixels as in your original.Quote:
Originally Posted by Haunted
I didn't even notice that :(.Quote:
Originally Posted by PrinceMyshkin
Maybe they're just out to lunch. I'll do a roll call after 2pm.
Nothing worse than a missing pixel, or a gnome. especially a square one!
Looks pretty good to me.
xo
xo xxoo
A Short Collection of Trashy Poems
introduction
D22 westbound
Victoria’s other secret
ghost fog
paper chase
love story
forcast
penitentiary
overnight snow
the little dancer
his green eyes
September 2nd
existence
dinner date
don't take my baby
car talk
Google Earth
dead on
postmarked 1948
My name is Jane
Every one a gem that we may have read before, but worth visiting once again. Superb!
have a new one, just can't decide whether to post here or as a separate thread....
Separate thread - make it stand out!!!!
did it!!! bathing beauty
I just feel like posting an old mediocre poem...please trash away!
dinner date
1.
when our eyes
met for the first time
they locked like the
strongest deadbolt
we went to a movie
and left before
it was over
2.
hair flows down
your eyelids flutter
my hand......almost touching
instantly your lips part
you hungry...
3.
we had the
longest dinner
ever
4.
your eyes queried:
would there be seconds
I glanced back:
what does your gut say
5.
just as in an old movie
I wrote on a matchbook
then I left Room 1105
the door locked itself behind me
Quote:
Originally Posted by Haunted
I love the poem it love tale about maybe couple relight passion but end verse it sort to 1 night stand. :hurray:
thanks so much zoo! I was lamenting just how transient relationship can be.
I like the halting flow of these short poems - the lingering look, time slowed then speeded up. her number on a book of matches.....well done with the desired effect
I like the 'locks' theme that starts with the deadbolt in v1 and ends with the door finally slamming itself shut in v5.
There's a lot left unsaid - a lot of gaps the reader is invited to fill in. Subtle, enigmatic. Like a film noir.
The only person I know that can write in Monochrome. The scene as the hotel door shuts is heart-wrenching.... As Hill said, film noir, the saddest, grainy, flickering...
Thanks Delta, glad you like the changing rhythm.
Hill, thanks for the nice comment! It's amazing you mentioned the locks, I almost dropped the last line but then I remember the reason it was there was because it encapsulates a rather special encounter.
Daf, how did you know, I'm monochromatic in many ways. I felt sad myself writing the end, but I'm not good at making things last.
I especially liked #4 with the double entendre on "seconds" but think
will there be seconds
should be would there be seconds
thanks so much Prince, I changed it!
I too liked stanza four in particular. The double entendre pointed out by Prince followed by the further double meaning of 'what does your gut tell you?' I couldnt find the outcome in the final stanza, but then I guess mystery was your goal :)
Thanks Jerry, I had fun writing S4, being that I'm not good at all with dialogues. This is one of those "stories" that let you write your own ending. I guess it would be nice for the relationship to develop but when I was writing it, those words just wrote themselves. Not much surprise though coming from the queen of gloom and doom. ;)
don’t take my baby
it’s new year’s eve
there's an end to everything
outside
storm has moved out
just soft feathery residual flakes
inside
the blizzard is tear blinding
can I hold her
he nods
(even with the blanket she’s ice cold)
another hug
he nods
(she was once a big girl)
it’s the holidays
I know you want to get home but—
please
one last time
he nods
(she's just a baby)
caringly he took
her tiny emaciated body
her gray tabby tail
that ends in a black tip
hangs down like
an exclamation mark
~for Skippy~
Hey darl... I feel you. I know how I felt when I lost my Brandy (Australian Terrier). Feel for your dear.
xo
Thanks Mary...and sorry about Brandy XO