What do you call a handcuffed man?
Trustworthy.
Why do men like smart women?
Opposites attract.
How are men like lawn mowers?
They're hard to get started, they emit noxious odors, and half the time they don't work.
How do men exercise on the beach?
By sucking in their stomachs every time they see a bikini.
How do you get a man to stop biting his nails?
Make him wear shoes.
How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
ONE......He just holds it up there and waits for the world to revolve around him.
What did God say after creating man?
I can do so much better.
What do you call a man with half a brain?
Gifted.
Why is it good that there are female astronauts?
When the crew gets lost in space, the woman will ask for directions
What do you do with a bachelor who thinks he's God's gift to women?
Exchange him.
Why did God create man before woman?
Because you're always supposed to have a rough draft before creating your masterpiece.
Virgil? :D
