Congrats, GG!
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Congrats, GG!
That was one of your best yet GG.
great feedback Melanie thank you:)
and congratulations Gilliat it is indeed a great piece :)
ora pro nobis
The sign above the door reads "Pray for Us."
Every moment, every hour, every day
We have so much going on that we don't understand
Could you send me kind wishes, if you don't pray?
Nobody knows the troubles I've seen
Are words in a song that were just words to me
How the mighty have fallen! Sand castles fall down
I never thought of how cruel life can be
I don't ask for your money, your pity, your tears
Just a breath of encouragement, a word of hope
Lend me your prayers, warm wishes, uplifting words
Sometimes the smallest whisper is what helps me cope
Black and white,
Lines and light
Curves to trap the eyes
Flowing down,
Through the town
Where the wonder lies.
Prayers of St. Dié
Mother Pray for us,
For the children at the school door,
For the Widows who carry the bread to the market place.
And the street sweeper under the tree.
For the old men gathered in front of the hotel,
For the young men gathered in England,
And for those hiding in the Mountains of Vosages,
For those arrested by the Wehrmacht,
For those who disappeared in the night.
Pray for them and for us, who wait.
Take my hand and come with me
Through rhythmic patterns and pauses
Down pebbled streets, between stone walls
Around spiral stairway balustrades.
Amid all the complexities
Of shapes and textures and history
Live pure and humble humankind
In simple commonality.
Feed the birds. Gather to bake breads.
Let's share their lives of tranquility
Centered in prayer, "Ora Pro Nobis"
In Aquila Degli Abruzzi.
Nice entries so far...
Anybody awake here? This is a month overdue for judging! Helloooooooooo! :confused5::confused5::confused5:
Pen
In Post #1360, below the photo:
This is only the 12th....5 days to go yet.Quote:
Originally Posted by Gilliatt Gurgle
But reminders are always welcomed. TY, pendragon
Maybe some others would like to post an entry.
It's only 10:20 AM here, but it's the end of the day somewhere in the world right?, so let's move on...Quote:
Originally Posted by Gilliatt Gurgle
Interesting that most picked up on the “Ora pro nobis”, when I hadn’t given it a second thought initially when taking in the overall composition of the image. I suspect, however, that Bresson was well aware of the words with his strategic, but subtle placement at the highest point of the image so the sentiment may dominate the cascade of daily humble activity in L’Aqulia from above.
The headwater’s of a stream begins with a prayer.
Pendragon
Interesting take by crafting the poem entirely upon the words “ora pro nobis”.
I struggled a bit with the meter/ flow of the 3rd and 4th lines and the wording “so much going on”. When reading about L’Aquila, I learned that the city and region has suffered through many devastating earthquakes, the most recent in 2009. The second half of your poem starting with “How the mighty…”, alludes to the past devastation, in my interpretation, with words; “Fallen”, “sand castles fall down”, cruel life”, etc., quite strong.
Inspiring poem.
YesNo
Short and to the point, you captured the essence of the “mechanics” of Bresson’s image composition. Having now convinced myself that Bresson’s subtle placement of “ora pro nobis”, is crucial to his underlying theme, causes me to lean toward those poems that make reference to it.
Prendrelemick
From L’Aquila in Italy to eastern France and St. Dié, you stumped me on this one. Perhaps the point is that this image could be any number of places, away from the battle, in a village of war torn Europe. Regardless of where the image was taken, the message is the same.
Melanie
This poem does it all; it speaks well to the cascading composition touching on the various elements in the first stanza, followed by themes of humble tranquil life in small Italian enclave their lives dominated by prayer, beseeching prayer and ending in a nice touch by mentioning L’Aquila.
“Oro” or “Ora”?
I’m giving the edge to Melanie.
Congratulations Melanie
Nice entries by all, maybe we can get others to join in?
I feel quite honored as I know it was a slight edge...all were so good. I was impressed with the picture choice which inspired many of us. Good one, Gilliatt. It made for a fun challenge. I'll spend a little time trying to find one that also inspires. Hopefully, it will be up before the end of tomorrow, maybe today even.
(oops...ora...ty, I'll change that).
So, here we go....
(deadline september 10th)
http://i1312.photobucket.com/albums/...ps758fe573.jpg
the cycle of life
it moves suave
across the
layers of
timeless prayers
a human shape
a lady's height
passes its light
silent but might
to evening's bright
that's perfect sight
Shadows of the Future
She is a shadow on a bridge of shadows
Etched by the sun on a background of light
Perhaps heading home, perhaps starting a journey
Is it dawn of day, or the falling of night?
Maybe today she had problems to face,
Maybe there's a long road ahead
She placidly pushes her bicycle over the bridge
Either ready for the workday or bed
The photograph catches only the silhouette
It cannot record what's in her mind
But she pushes her bicycle on to the future
And she comes walking behind...
Pendragon
© 8/27/2013
On the Bridge
She walks with timeless ease,
leading her bicycle across
the gold-divided sky—
above, the blue; below,
the reeds, and water
lapping at the bank.
Beyond the stream
lie trees and grasslands
verdant in the sun,
but she, above them all,
silhouetted,
passes on.
That distant smoke meant trouble.
The air is blue above.
She's silhouetted in the sky.
Her bike's by her. The bridge is high.
What is she thinking of?
The Woman.
Stop time now,
At this perfect moment,
As she stands outside the frame,
Held in unspoiled blue,
Above the grim miasma
Of the world beneath,
Before she steps from her pedestal
Down into ordinariness,
Before her shoulders stoop,
From the weight of the day,
And I let my held breath go.
The camera grants half the wish,
Her shadow will remain forever on the bridge,
A picture of enchanted grace,
Her body will cross over, back into life,
Dirty, grubby Life! with all its joys and sorrows.
The Golden Section
Portrait of a girl; a silhouette in black,
strolls above the vernacular
of her austere world.
Provincial composition framed,
in Mondrian proportions;
a tree, a thatched dwelling, a reed.
Sooty, burnt gray of harvested cane,
splashes the scrim,
of her yellow ochre dusk.
Upon my airy spoken wings
I swallowed all there was.
New horizon dusted with peace
Land lay to sleep.
Dawn awakes to day.
I feel determined to follow thee
Until the pedal of life is exhausted.
New adventures
Everyday.
Kittypaws
http://i1312.photobucket.com/albums/...ps758fe573.jpg
Easy as...
A higher
point
of
view leads one to
a
straight and narrow path
A nobler purpose if you desire
Let the
spirit be your guide, and
yes, you will be blessed
Cultivate
gifts of the spirit;
be charitable above all
Keep covenants made, never waver;
hearken to the still small voice
Rise above the turmoil, eschewing
contention
If need
be - repent
The righteous seek life eternal
HIS yoke is Light...
9/8/2013 r.9/9/2013 r.9/10/2013
Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
tailor STATELY
Gilliatt Gurgle - every line of this poem was artfully mastered, from "provincial composition framed in Mondrian proportions", to "splashes the scrim of her yellow ochre dusk". Your artist-self was very evident in this piece. I like it when a poem effortlessly reveals so much about the writer. Well executed too.
Hawkman - many good lines here like "with timeless ease", "above the blue; below the reeds". The last stanza was a skillful closure that I particularly liked: "but she, above them all, silhouetted, passes on." Great ending.
prendrelemick - I liked how you began with the stop action of the camera in a commanding "stop time now" that grabbed my attention. You made a very interesting contrast between a "perfect moment...in unspoiled blue" and "above a grim miasma". Also, I liked your astute acknowledgement of the camera's accomplishment: "her shadow will remain forever on the bridge" partially granting her wish to remain in the moment. Cleverly crafted.
cacian - another clever title, and your idea of the "cycle of life moving across layers of timeless prayers" was beautifully worded...one of my favorite poems of yours.
Pendragon - you offered thought provoking questions based on your unique observations that was very engaging for your readers. Well done.
YesNo - you also offered a thought provoking question based on your unique observations that was very engaging for your readers. Well done to you too.
tailorSTATELY - an inspirational take on this photo from a "higher point of view on a straight and narrow path"...brilliant perspective I found to be very enlightening. The "of" on a line of it's own, as well as the "a" kind of made me stumble a little while reading it but that's just me (see tailorStately's explanation below...very creative reasoning...good job). Lots of wisdom packed into this poem. Excellent.
Kittypaws - Your opening line of "Upon my airy spoken wings" was soothingly descriptive and very intriguing. I couldn't help but notice your poem was uniquely written in first-person...no one else embraced it quite as personally as you did, and your approach of wide-eyed wonder and positive outlook for your future was refreshing. Your line, "new horizons dusted with peace" embodied the serenity of the whole image. This gentle, mellow poem was a pleasure to read.
This is really a tough choice. I'm really debating. Everyone deserves recognition.
Congratulations Kittypaws!
Congratulations Kittypaws !
The aforementioned "of" and "a" were on lines requiring only 1-syllable; the sequence being: 3.1415926535897932384... as ascribed by the pylons and path, and bicycle wheels ( the "." designated as the word "point" ). Easy as... pi ( π )
I am remiss: Thank you Melanie for your kind words.
Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
tailor STATELY
Melanie thank you very much for the feedback and Kittypaws well done a well deserved win :)
Congrats KittyPaws. and thank you to Melanie for the kind words!
There were some really excellent poems for that one, I'm glad I wasn't judging. Well done Melanie that was a great pic and pick. Congratuations KittyPaws.
Clever!Quote:
Originally Posted by tailor STATELY
Thank you Melanie for the comments.
btw- do you mind telling us about the picture? was it a random find? one you took?, location?, etc.
Well done KP
I sure hope Kittypaws scrolls up to read the big news. Meanwhile, thank you for your comments everyone.
tailorSTATELY, I now have a new respect for your "a" and "of". Thx for taking the time to explain. I agree with prendrelemick, clever!
Gilliatt, I don't know the photographer's name but it's the U Bein's bridge (longest teak bridge in the world, almost a mile long) near Amarapura, Myanmar (in Burma near Mandalay). Everyday at dawn and again at sunset the monks and local villagers traverse the bridge. I didn't have this information when I posted it for the contest...might be just as well because it may have narrowed the creative field for some. I thought it was someplace in Kansas, ha. I'm so glad you asked. Check out this similar photo from Flickr: www.flickr.com/photos/35434356@N06/3282183144
That link was working but it may not now. If not just go to "google images" and type in U Bein's Bridge.
I am here.
Thank you Melanie for the kind words. And thank YOU all for the congrats. :blush5:
I am glad you enjoyed it. I was also taken by surprise that you recognized my wide eye wonderment and positive outlook. I was not trying to achieve that in writing this short little piece....I reckon my true self just came through, perhaps that had something to do with writing in 1st person....which honestly I never gave it a second thought.
The image you posted inspired me. I watched it, felt it and wrote what I felt.
I too feel that all the submission were very good....as they always are.:)
so I reckon I get to post the next image?
Then have to judge within a couple of weeks?
Ohhhhh.....I'm not to sure how I will do at judging others works but I will give it my best shot.
Give me a day or two for the image, please.
kittypaws
To All ~
Here is my image submission for your creative writing minds.
http://i801.photobucket.com/albums/y...hotoprompt.jpg
Dream on....
Kittypaws
The Halls of Ruined Lives
Nothing remains but the echoes
of laughter
which titter down the halls,
like the fleeting mad
who once resided here.
The silence is almost worse
for you feel as if you are never quite alone,
and fear to turn around,
the irony that all too soon
your own sanity starts to melt away.
The raving howls sweep
down the halls like a lonely wind,
is that a knocking somewhere?
Or just your own heartbeat?
Here is where nightmares
were made of those who
lived their lives in a perpetual
dream.
And you only skim the edge
of this distorted reality
and against all reason
you continue to venture
further into the hallway
of lost souls.
Behemoth
Running with the fanatical energy of fear
down the dark, ebony boulevard,
I hear the thunderous trumpeting of the beast,
buried somewhere in the blackness behind me,
and the very ground shakes and trembles
with each furious footfall of my unmerciful pursuer.
I glance fearfully over my shoulder,
but I cannot discern the dim form
anywhere among the walls of obscurity behind me.
Dizziness comes over me,
and then the night streets become corridors,
long, empty hallways in my mind
stretching towards a beckoning doorway.
I know that if I can reach it, I am safe.
But still I hear the echoing thud of large feet,
and a mind-numbing, bone-chilling roar...
Pendragon
At the end of the tunnel the light
Tempts me kindly to follow my sight.
Though an insect who flies
To a light likely dies,
Death retreats while that shining stays bright.
happy hollow
to lights follow
corridor sorrows
empty has long
shadowing wrong
eternity narrows
__________________________________________________ _________________
the hall in
the corridor
looks old
the windows
sleepy feel sole
the lights
shimmer
and only dimmer
the shadows
silhouette
to walls they
fret
the image
that sets
is ancient
but bête
http://i1312.photobucket.com/albums/...psdabaf5e3.jpg
perfect symmetry
interrupted by shadows
of time and decay
sitting in darkness
my eyes open
not knowing the future
all that remains is light
seeping through illusions
of repetition and pattern
spilling into my view
through silent corridors
my name written on its walls
Bump!
I would image it is time to chose which poem I feel seems to fulfill the photo.
Dark Muse
I felt your poem described very well what one who lives in an asylum may feel.
Pendragon
Your poem does describe quite well the enormous and terrible feeling of the image and I liked how you used the door as an escape.
YesNo
A very positive view of this image. I liked how you saw it through different eyes. Well done.
cacian
I liked the flow of your poem. Good job.
Melaine
"perfect symmetry
interrupted by shadows
of time and decay
sitting in darkness
my eyes open
not knowing the future"
I liked this verse and thought it did a good job of capturing the mood of the image.
It is hard to pick a winner as I think each one of you are winners and all write so very well.
OK....I choose Dark Muse for this one.
Thank you very much. When I saw the picture, the first thing that popped into my head was an abandoned Asylum. (Of course that is what I would think of) I will have a new picture soon.
Ok, here is your next photo
http://d3oeu2l8qd7s1b.cloudfront.net...3-946863-7.jpg
Deadline: October 15th