1281 - Robin, vaguely shocked, scribbles on the canvas in blood (lacking any other ink) and tosses it back.
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Originally Posted by Stranded Robin
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1281 - Robin, vaguely shocked, scribbles on the canvas in blood (lacking any other ink) and tosses it back.
The message:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Stranded Robin
1282 - He hopes that one of the mermaids will take pity on him. But to Robin’s misfortune, the stench of blood on the canvas attracts hundreds of sharks. The canvas is swallowed by one unlucky shark. And what followed was bloody mayhem. The hitherto harmless herbivorous sharks turn cannibalistic and attack the one which swallowed the blood stained canvas, tearing away chunks of meat until the canvas is once again out in the agitated waters turbid with blood. The blood bath continues until only a few fatally injured and lame ones, unable to fight any more, retreat.
The sunlight can no longer penetrate the opaque waters, now, almost, saturated with blood. The beautiful mermaids who dwell on the ocean floor soon become aware of the untimely darkness that has engulfed their heavenly abode. They not only see that their surroundings are now illuminated in pallid red but also sense a mild but intensifying stench of death. The crimson fluid soon pervades their entire dwelling and the nauseating stench forces them to leave the waters. With fear and curiosity they take to their tails and swim hastily towards the surface where they are greeted by mutilated bodies of dead sharks floating all around. There being no other refuge, they swim towards the shore and notice that several dead sharks have been washed ashore. They also notice a fire burning on the seashore.
The mermaids having turned into women upon setting their tail on the shore, make their way towards the fire. On reaching there, as one would have already guessed, they come across our friend, Robin, who is fast asleep, after feasting on a dead shark and emptying a bottle of rum which he had found amongst a ancient ship-wreck. The mermaids notice the pile of fish bones next to him and conclude that he is the miscreant who has caused the defilement of their abode. One of them nudges him awake. Robin, who is still in a inebriated condition, slowly opens his eyes. He is dumbstruck with awe at the sight of unclad women, whose wet bodies gleam in the twilight with the crimson hue cast by dancing flames. Blood continues to drips from their long golden hair. One of them holds out a tattered canvas before his face which he recognizes.
1283........a loooooooong pause............
1284
The mermaids finally leave robin for dead on the island and go off to play with bubble balls.
1285 - NOOOOO!!!
Robin gets up and staggers towards the water with the intent of diving in after the mermaids, but is so horribly hammered that he falls forward, planting his face in the dirt. Using his fingers and toes, he slowly crawls towards the sea across the thankfully-no-longer-hot sand.
1286 what he didnt realise is it would take him a YEAR to crawl in this fashion but finally like a very lucky newly hatched turtle he reached the sea. But by then the mermaids had migrated due to global warming.
1287 - But before he can get to the water the mermaids once again return; each carrying a bag full of jewels. They walk past him without sparing him a glance. Several uneventful days pass and Robin gets tired of looking at the mermaids who continue to ignore him. In addition to the relentless jabbering, all that the mermaids did was wear their jewellery, sun bathe and remove the jewellery before going to sleep.
1288 - Robin was looking for this opportunity and he decamped with all the jewellery.
1289 - Only to be taken prisoner by Caesar who was returning with his fleet after plundering Atlantis.
1290 - Robin thought, it's just a matter of time and he would soon be out of prison to take his revenge.
1291 - However noble Caesar has no plans to keep Robin alive for long. He intends to offer him as sacrifice to mighty Poseidon to secure a safe passage home.
1292 Robin finally finished his shiv, and stabbed his jailor when he brought him his so-called daily meal. Robin has now escaped from prison, and exits the cell joyfully, only to trip over the beard he grew during his long incarceration! :brow:
1293. . . Robin, back in his cell after his foiled escape attempt, is miserable. In the meantime, Caesar manages to pick up a priest stranded on a shipwrecked galleon. Not knowing what else to do with him, he throws the priest in with Robin. . .
1294--The priest turns out to be Pietro del Morone, the reclusive monk who is attempting to flee rather than be elected Pope. He befriends Robin while hiding out in Caesar's jail cell (what Caesar's doing still alive in 1294 is a mystery...but then Robin's getting up there in years too :lol: ), and when the King of Naples comes along to escort him back to Rome, he takes Robin with him. Robin gets to shoot off an honorary golden arrow when Morone becomes Pope Celestine V in August. Robin gets to drinking too much Vatican wine in the company of a fat cardinal. Unfortunately for Robin, by the time he's fully sober again, Pope Celestine V has started abdication procedures. By December he's out and Boniface VIII is in.
1295 - Robin wonders why on earth things keep happening to him in spite of his not posting anything. At any rate, Robin barters sketches of naked mermaids for safe passage back to England. And a shave (he tries to only make his mistakes once). The Pope, as it happens, is his primary trade partner.
...1....2...9...6
1297- Robin has just sat down after arriving home, when Robina and Azeem come in from their 'round the world cruise. Figuring that he probably hasn't been up to much, they tease Robin that he must not have moved the whole time they were gone, since he's sitting in the same spot as when they left.
1300~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
1301
:d
1303~~~~~~~~~~~$%^&*(
1304--Petrarch is born! :banana:
1305 - Happy first birthday Petrarch
1306 - Robin, who is NOT in the mood for lip right now, shoots each Robina and Azeem in the foot.
1307 - Their feet being firmly stuck to the wooden floor by Robin’s arrow, Robina and Azeem scream in pain. Robin calmly takes out a couple of deadly blood-sucking leeches from a small metal container and pops one each into their open mouths. These are no ordinary leeches. While Robin was the honoured guest of Pope Celestine V, he had illicitly procured these mutant leeches, from the well-known V.S.L. (Vatican Secret Laboratory) where they were created. The clergy used them to murder anyone who claimed that Jesus had fathered a child with Mary Magdalene. Robin had obtained them to silence stupid people who said annoying things, whom he often encountered.
1308 -Robin, who had the last laugh, was about to disappear from the crime scene, when the cops, having been alerted by the neighbours who had heard the screams, came along and took Robin into custody. They seize from his possession a bow, 4 arrows, 8 leeches in a metal box and 12 sketches of nude mermaids. The post-mortem report of Robina and Azeem conclusively link the cause of death to the presence of deadly leeches, similar to the ones found in Robin’s possession. The sketches of naked mermaids are linked to the sensational scandal which shook the Vatican in 1295. The scandal had concluded with the conviction of Robin’s friend and disgraced Pope Celestine V, under Section. 292 of the Vatican Penal Code, for corrupting the clergy by selling pornography. The pope was sentenced to serve life term in solitary confinement at the Chateau D'if. The prison guards think he is mad because of the strange stories he tells them.
1309 - At the trial, Robin takes the plea of insanity. Luckily for Robin, the Judge is an atheist who despises the ways of the church. The Judge’s parents had died along with hundreds of others in a mysterious fire accident while attending a congregation of the Opus Dei. There were rumours about the hand of the church in origin of the conflagration which incinerated the entire congregation. The Judge acquits Robin holding that the actus reus was not backed by mens rea as he had lost his mind on the island where he had been marooned. The judge commits him to a mental asylum.
1310 - The clergy who were instrumental in sending Pope Celestine V to the Chateau D'if are infuriated by the acquittal. Determined to make him suffer, they hatch a conspiracy to kidnap Robin from the asylum. On the night of 23rd July 1310, Robin mysteriously disappears from the asylum. Robin wakes up at 3.59 AM on the following day and finds himself in a dungeon. He feel like he has been asleep for a year.
His head hurts terribly. He feels the back of his head and grimaces with pain as his fingers sense a lump and clotted bood. He tries to remember what had happened, but is interrupted by a strange noise. Scrape..........scrape.........scrape.......
1311 - Robin staggers towards the door holding his head and listens. The noise seems to be that of a shovel. He thought "Who could that be?"
1313~~~~~cool
1314 - Robin wakes up from his alcohol-induced nightmare and pays a phone call to Friar Tuck to heal his offspring-in-law Robina and Azeem before passing out again.
1315--Robina and Azeem, having had their feet nicely healed by Friar Tuck, finally manage to wake dear old Dad and ask him why he was so cranky. He tells them the whole long story and they are amazed. Robina refuses to let him hang a large naked mermaid picture over the mantle, so Robin and Azeem take it out to their workshed and hang it over the spot where they mark the days of the year. Thus the precurser to the modern swimsuit calender is born. Meanwhile Robin Jr.'s witchy wife, Astra, steals all the leaches Robin brought with him and discovers that not only was their lethal quality a dream, but they won't even suck blood like normal leeches. They're vegetarian leeches that suck juices from plants. Astra decides to keep them as pets.
1316 - I think that this has become a story telling thread instead of the count...but it is quite entertaining.
1317 - no problem
1318 - I don't mind :D.
1319...it is quite entertaining:)
1320 - Couldn't agree more :nod: