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Let's move this one along now:
Jaked: Nice use of the Death Star line, kind of hoped people would see some of my favorite fictional universes in this shot!
YesNo: Great use of The Judd! Doctor Who is also among my favorite fictional universes!
Prendrelemick: Great use of Dante! Hadn't quite thought of that inspiration, but you pull it off well!
cacian: Wonderful use of rhyme! I've often thought about doing that for a form poetry contest, find one rhyme and keep it going!
Only one winner, when as far as I am concerned, all of them are wonderful expressions on the picture. But the nod goes to Prendrelemick for bringing in Dante and the end of the universe, at least for humans!
Good show all. Congrats, Prendrelemick! You're up!
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Congratulations Prendrelemick and thank you Pendragon that was an impressive picture.
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'I shall be procuring a new hovercraft'
sayeth the maiden
'What for?' asketh her maid freshly plucked
from the plantation
'At dawn's break' she wriggled on her roids
'Thence I'll be all set'
'I shall remember to wake you at sunrise'
sayeth the ebony head
'Egads!' came the startled sudden horror
'Where are your eyes!'
'What do you mean?' tried to lookinglass
'Hey yeah!' she realised
'Ha Ha Ha! You can't see anything! Pip!'
'How misfortunate!'
'I hope you can still stuff the substances
into my bong alright!'
'I should - but firstly I should locate my
peepers perhaps yes?'
'No time for that!' the maiden snappeth
'I need a fix and a fex!'
'Eww. What's that smell? Did Her Highness
drop the Royal Guts?'
'Are you accusing me of blowing a stinky!
How dare you sir! Guards!'
'Oh I'm so sorry - must've been me - please
accept my apology!'
'Gotcha! Were I to send you to the dungeons
I'd miss out on my-'
'Hoverscraft?' sayeth the maid 'You'll be blowing
some gas with that!'
'What!' she is shocked 'I'm right here you know!'
'Found your eyes yet?'
'Nope, but I should be heading off-'
'What! [Phrrrrt!] Who's letting off!'
'Hee hee hee...'
'Tee hee hee...'
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Light Girl, Dusky Girl
I get her fixed up for her party
I never even get from her thanks
She shares her problems with me
I hold her when she cries in the night
In public she puts me "in my place!"
My skin is not the cream, it's the coffee
My people are servants, not kings
The color of skin they say makes one inferior
Here on Earth our duty to obey and serve
Dreams are discouraged, ambition squelched
But tonight she'll come home from her party
So drunk I'll have to help her get dressed for bed
I'll sit by her side, for I anticipate the moment
When she awakes and she cries in the night
I'll hold her again, and ask myself:
Who is really the better off here?
Pendragon
(C) 11/20/2012
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''mirror mirror
tell meth how
I shall looketh today
pretty sad or brave?''
to which mirror replied:
''taketh a way you may
now go and
find a faith
and maketh tell you
tales
and give myself a rest''
to which the
girl replied:
''oh mirror such
you tate
I shan't detain
you nay
any longer then weight
I shall looketh
for faith and if
I find it
I shall sure make it a stayt''
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Looking in the Mirror
Pretty maiden with her maid
Prepares her charms for life today.
Her prince will see
No one but she
Would make a better wife today.
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MM. On reading your poem I looked again at the pic and yes, from her expression she could well be sneaking one out. I've often wondered what girls discuss when they get together, and this doesn't really help at all. I liked the last two lines though, good ending.
Pen. Intresting, the poor little rich girl scenario and the squelched ambitions of the dark skinned.
Cacian. I like your idea the best - a mirror tired of reflecting the same pretty face telling her to go out and find a different faith. The trouble is I don't understand some of the words you use, or the context of other words known to me. Is that intentional? Do you do it for an effect? I admire your confidence to make up a word when you need one, but I can't always see how they fit in either. So as usual with your poems , I THINK its very good, but am not entirely sure.
YesNo. A single simple idea, simply expressed. backed up by a thousand years of romantic notions.
And so to judgement....
I really wanted to give it to Cacian because of the central idea . So I read it about 20 times and interpreted it and substituted bits of it and guessed about other bits and tried to understand, and then decided that essentially, that is what poetry is all about - the readers interaction with the words the poet chooses and what he/she makes of it, what it reminds them of and what new thoughts it stimulates. (Just like The Wasteland!)
MM's effort also had something of this quality, while the other two were more straight-forwards - all the work was done for me.
So the winner is Cacian.
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1 Attachment(s)
Prendrelemick I thank you so much for your confidence in this poem. The words I chose are just modelled around the piece for effect. A bit like pottery making I simply model words to fit the shape or the idea of the poem. I like visuals in poetry shape and sound wise.
Thank you very much again and this is the link to the picture my computer does not seem to let me download the picture but rather the link.:blush5:
If anyone can help here is the link to the picture:
Attachment 8520
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Daydreaming
What punishment should Julius get
For being who he is
Who thinks that any girl he's met
Is glad that she is his?
The idle ides of March are done.
Tonight she'll let him know.
The future's new and has begun.
It's time for her to go.
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prendrelemick je vous remercie. Thank you.
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Dreamers of the Sea
Dreamers of the sea
gaze wonderingly at the vast
uncharted beyond
while wistfully hoping to be swept
away to the far side of the world,
somewhere unknown
unseen
and each waking hour will bring
a new discovery,
but they remain trapped
in life's frivolities,
and tiresome idle pleasures
that bring little joy,
only expectation,
but they do not give up
that some day
their tide will come in
and carry them
far
far
far
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Launching a Thousand Ships
She looks out to sea as the warships draw nigh
Helen of Troy with a gleam in her eye
Perhaps she would be more worried if she knew this
It was her face that launched all of these ships
War comes to Troy because the Goddesses were vain
Promised Helen to Paris not thinking to explain
That she was the wife of a noble in Troy
Playing their games with that weakling of a boy
Blood will be upon the water, death ruin the land
Lover and friends done to death by Greek hands
But Helen doesn't know the things that Fate holds
So she smiles out to sea in the soft sunset glow
Pendragon
(C) 12/13/2012
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One more day to go anyone?
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OK and here are the results of this round:
Whilst it has been very difficult for me to decide which to chosem the three pieces are a joy to read and all three deserve a first place win, I have to chose one and this time it is :
Day Dreaming by YesNo.
I felt the piece was short and concise and spoke to me. I enjoyed its simplicity and the way it reads. I also think the ''Idle of March'' did it for me.
Congratulations YesNo!!!
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Thank you, cacian! I'll try to find a picture for the next contest this evening.
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Here is an image of an ancient Egyptian couple for the next contest.
I've seen various statues like this with the female having her hand behind the male and sometimes the other hand might be on the male's arm. He is sometimes holding something in his hands and they are both standing. I don't know much about the style.
http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Fi...279_couple.jpg
Here's another example of the style. Either image would work.
http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Fi..._and_queen.jpg
Deadline: Sunday evening, January 13th.
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Pharaoh and His Wife
Beneath the ancient skies
two lovers, hand in hand
walk together under a vastness
of the stars.
They approach
a world of uncertainty,
on the cusp of everything,
where power ripples as the sands
beneath their feet,
to dissipate at any moment.
To each other they cling,
to hold it together,
they stand tall bearing the weight
of the world upon their shoulders.
The gods watching above,
with critical eye
expecting to mold the divine
within mortal flesh
in their earthly representatives.
And rise or fall in time
they will become immortalized,
captured in one stolen moment
as but two lovers beneath
an ancient sky.
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Sometimes love is soon forgotten
Here today, tomorrow gone
They made certain theirs got noticed
Love forever carved in stone
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a certain beauty
stands beside
him
he who noticed
her before him
desire
most of her entire
and she who saw with him
the kind
requires all of his
attire
in dreams they shire
in days they pier
and forthuitely
together they tide
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Our love will live on forever
We know our mortal Fate is dust
Sculpted in stone together
Love's survival shall be must.
Hold me tightly in your arms
While we stand together and muse
Let's delight in double harness
Two bodies in One Soul fuse.
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shoeless kings
and jeweless queens
ancient egyptian royals
standing firm
united as one
powerful and loyal
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Thank you for your contributions!
Dark Muse The gods watching them in the second to the last stanza and the "stolen" moment in the last stanza were what I remember most.
Pendragon Stone helps us recall their love thousands of years later. Nice presentation in only a few lines.
cacian The first five lines marked by the "beside him" and "before him" sounded very nice to me.
mazHur The dust of our bodies, stability of stone, and the eternity of love are well combined here.
Melanie I liked the "shoeless", "jeweless", "powerful" and "loyal" adjectives. I hope to read more of your poetry.
You all deserve to win. However, I have to pick one. So, the winner is Dark Muse!
Congratulations!
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Thank you very much, I will have the new pic up soon
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Congratulations Dark Muse! I liked "beneath the ancient skies" that began and ended your poem. Nice touch.
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The Maul
I left the food court fully fed
feeling a bit like the walking dead
Then sought the way down when I saw
Sharks infesting the escalator pond
So I wandered to the elevator
(I'm no fool !)
But when the doors opened (ding!) before me
I fled helter-skelter from a fiery demon
beckoning me in
Surely the stairwell will be safe
to make my escape, but NO!
slithering everywhere were creepy-crawly snakes
snapping at all who dared to come near
So now I reside at Bed, Bath, and Beyond
and every day feed the sharks at the
escalator pond
Get my exercise racing demons on their way to
the elevators... and hope them snakes
get eaten by concourse alligators
1/25/2013
Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
tailor STATELY
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Sharks in the Basement
Loud noises, huge heights,
No wrongs burn to rights,
The basement's high flood,
The sharks smell the blood.
They wait for us there.
Their teeth slice and tear
Sharper than knives
Extinguishing lives.
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Only two entries so far?
I am setting the deadline at Feb 15th
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There's water in my basement
I cannot drain it all
So I'm heading down to bail it out
Why do I hear the theme from Jaws?
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This one was hard, I really thought each of these was great but I had to pick one winner
YesNo: Loved your use of rhyme in this one. And I thought this line in particular was great "No wrongs burn to rights." Some really good imagery, I really enjoyed this one.
Pendragon: The last line was great, and made me laugh out loud. I enjoyed the playfulness of this one, with the surprise at the end, offering a suspenseful cliffhanger of an ending to the poem.
And the winner is......
tailor STATELY: This was great I loved everything about it. First of all the double meaning in the name was a nice touch, and the reference to the walking dead did earn you bonus points. I really liked the creativity of it, and the mix of darkness with humor. Some really great lines.
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congratulations tailor STATELY!!
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Thank you ! I'll have a new picture up shortly.
Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
tailor STATELY
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1 Attachment(s)
And here we go! (I think),
http://i129.photobucket.com/albums/p..._w725_h544.jpg
Attachment 8625
Deadline March 14th.
Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
tailor STATELY
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Change
Carefully carved canoe rests on the grass
With woven bee-hive huts hibernating in the distance
It was a time of old world tech and simple lives
New tech comes in high strung wires
Telephone poles replace natural trees
Satellites obscure the bright sunlight
In with the new, out with the old
Except for exquisite memories
Pendragon
(Copyrighted material)
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Canoe
The canoe is out of water
Waiting on the grass,
Anxious, hoping on the bay,
It's built to float not sink away
Like those who try yet fail each day.
It hopes at least to pass.
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a canoe lays abrupt
to dry land and prompt
against the stumps
of soil and sunk
sea life its runs
is long gone
to suns feathers
and pearls
may the time
will come
for it to ride
to waters
once more
and fun
the many stunts it done
