Robin...dear Robin! He is now gone
from this vale of tears, now I weep and sob
On a stair he fell and laid, broken until the dawn...
the cause, a thoughtless leaving of a devoured corn cob
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Robin...dear Robin! He is now gone
from this vale of tears, now I weep and sob
On a stair he fell and laid, broken until the dawn...
the cause, a thoughtless leaving of a devoured corn cob
The day is sunny and no cloud in sight.
Beautiful as ever was seen a day,
But with it comes the demise
Of dear Kathy, she went out to play
In the river running deep, running wild.
She swam to far, falling prey
To the rapids, fast and furious.
And so is it that on this day
A lady died with broken bones.
Her body found in utter disarray
Spread out under the sunlight
On a quiet riverbank far away.
"Death to local turnip picker"
"In a freak accident, young turnip harvester, Aimus, missjudged the location of his mouth, and speared himself with a fork through dinner. Funeral will take place shortly"
After being sighted all over Europe, Chava has died recently. When she declared she would travel to the moon using only a spoon and chopsticks, everybody thought she was joking, but it turned out she was a real macguyver, and build a spaceship out of the spoon and chopsticks. However unfortunate, the spaceship used a very unstable form of energy known as onions. This caused the ship to explode in midflight, taking Chava with it. This terrible loss to the space program has promted NASA to hold a memorial service in honor of this space faring pioneer. Cake and drinks afterward.
Amius, Vampire Slayer?
In the cloudy evening, Aimus the Slayer approached the vampire's crypt. The coffin suddenly sprang open and the evening sun revealed the Vampire, Lord Sergio.
"But, but--the sunlight." Amius stammered.
"Oh, that. Sun block. Very high Spf. Only the best you know."
"Back!" Aimus screamed thrusting a crucifix at the oncoming undead one.
"Please." The Vampire Lord raised an arm, about which was wrapped a rosary. "I am a good Catholic."
"Then try this garlic, a concentrated spray!"
The Lord Sergio laughed. "I am Italian, my friend. You read too much bunk about us."
Aimus grasped his final weapon, a wooden stake, with silver tip. He drove it towards the vampire's chest. It passed through and fell to the floor. Lord Sergio seized Amius by the throat and squeezed. "Wrong type of stake my friend. You see, I am a vegetarian..." http://www.cosgan.de/images/kao/figuren/g065.gif
it was a beatiful spring day, as the sun backlit the trees and carnivorous poodles frolicked in the fields. suddenly, a shadow passed over the land. the poodles froze, and bared their teeth; the sun crept away and hid behind a cloud - and an enormous blue shape, carrying in his mouth a large desk - unfortunate victim of his hunger - touched down in the field. it set the desk right-side up and glared around it, as if in challenge to all comers. but its glare was not in vain. a small poodle jumped onto the desk and stared at it eye-to-eye, challenging the strangely-chromatized behemoth. The tension grew.
Finally, the poodle could no longer contain its carnivorous nature. it brought out tea and scones, and set them up on the writing desk. the dragon brought out his silk handkercheif to use as a napkin, and the two breakfasted on the lawn in the sunlight.
the next day, the newspapers showed two headlines: Kid Elected King By Sword - and (Pen)Dragon Dies of Overdose of Tea.
sorry about that . . . : )
Llama accident in Pennsylvania
A valued member of the Literature Network forums met an early and untimeful demise when her llamas stampeded after being scared by rogue turnips. Dear mir, we hope to see your dear face again someday, better hurry up and revive yourself.
:D :thumbs_upQuote:
Kid Elected King By Sword
Death of a Cheapskate ;)
It happened today in Massachusetts.
Pets fed up with a lack of benefits,
Decided to eat their mistress.
Who, as you might already guess
Made them chew on leftover bits.
(I have no idea how to correctly pronounce Massachusetts, so it either rhymes, or it doesn't. :goof: )
Drums I was once hearing from a place so far
Drums-like music my heart was beating so far
But drums was a music selebrating a seremony
Of man whose life turned to be agony
Aimus was cought by men-eaters on that day
And his soul found to heaven its way
Adil dreamed his dreams of reality,
Not once considering how bad it could be;
If but for once the scales fell from blinded eyes
And he was forced to recognize;
The sad sorrowful truth that dooms us all,
The gloom and trouble that must befall
All those who find that dark and foggy lane
That leans only to suffering and mortal pain.
A warning, my friend, is sufficient I deem:
Live out your life within your dreams...
"Oh dear! Come look at this!"
"What is it?" the leading archeologist asked from the newbie without turning his head. The first-year student had alarmed so for about twenty times about important issues like Coke-bottles and cigarette stubs.
"This one seems really strange..." the young will-once-become-the-best-archeologist said. "It seems like a giant skull."
Now the head archeologist turned his head. He almost spurted to the small site the young one had been clearing.
"Oh. My. God." he whispered, taken aback.
"Do you know what this one is, kid? Do you? No, I guess that stuff like this isn't taught in universities any more." He took a deep breath.
"This, my lad," he patronizingly said, "is the skull of a real dragon."
"But.... aren't those just a fairy-tale?," the student asked?
"Nah," the older man answered, carefully taking phorographs and brushing dirt offthe skull. "Just exctinct. Seems like this one was murdered. See the crack in the center of a skull."
At this moment, there was already quite an audience around them.
"Now, let's take a look at this," the old man theatically said pulling something out of the skull. "Do you know what this is?"
"A.... quill?" somebody volunteered.
"A pen, aye. Some dragons used to have pens in their heads, instead of stones. Rumoured to have magical properties, so there were quite a number of knights who wanted to chop open their heads to get them. Pendragons, they were called, you know."
"But how was this one murdered?" asked another voice from the crowd. "These creatures seem quite hard to slay."
"Among other things," the old man said, trying to look wise, "the pens of the pendragons were a mortal weapon against other dragons. A pen is sharper than a sword, as they say. Seems like this one was killed with such a quill."
And then he pulled another quill out of the skull.
"Seems like the knight never got to claiming the quills." he mentioned.
T is for Taliesin, who was mashed like potatoes....
http://i61.photobucket.com/albums/h56/kathycf/T.jpg
K is for Kathy, kawa karma, kestral keens to kith and kindrid she was killed by a kamakazi kraken, kaput kinder...
Woe to Pendragon, who trustingly crept too close to his gargantuan pet reptile...smoke billowed and our friend is no more.
Piper was shot down in her vintage Sopwith Camel areoplane by the Ghost of The Red Baron, who mistook the fair maiden for his archenemy, Snoopy...
http://www.grandearmee.com/ProductIm...FI_BRITISH.jpghttp://red-baron.blog-cafe.net/images/Snoopy_stamp.jpg