Thank you and yes you are correct. Hope you feel better soon, I will have the new quote up soon.Quote:
Originally Posted by Pendragon
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Thank you and yes you are correct. Hope you feel better soon, I will have the new quote up soon.Quote:
Originally Posted by Pendragon
Ok next quote:
The vast immortal suns, and the long-enduring pensive moons
From On the Beach At Night by Walt Whitman
Deadline Dec. 5
All gathered here we read the sacred runes,
Neath the vast immortal suns, and the long-enduring pensive moons
Time for feasting, the event comes soon
To revel, and drink, to carve a fowl under the harvest moon
The vast immortal suns first saw our race
The long-enduring pensive moons our hearts embraced
The annual ritual of contrite thanks
As the feast is served on the preserved oak planks
Of the ship that brought us to this fair shore
So we devour our share and long for more...
(C) 2013 Pendragon
"Above us are the vast immortal suns,
And all those long-enduring pensive moons
And most of them we cannot even see."
And so he rambled on methodically.
Immortal this, and more immortal that
While I began to weary with his words
Rejecting them with righteous, rich despair,
Until I yelled, "There's nothing Godly there!"
That silenced him for longer than I thought.
I figured he was strong while I was weak.
He never spoke to me again of what
He saw through inner visions of the sky,
While I, consumed with sparkling mortal things,
Delighted in the conquest I had made,
Delaying daily with reality
Deep in my cave, a lush, well-furnished grave.
Hey what's up. Don't mind me joining in!
I wanted to try out a game other than the Picture Poetry one so I ended up here. It seemed really interesting to me so I'm giving it a try ^^
Here's my poem:
The vast, immortal sun and moon
The vast, immortal sun and moon, floating in the sky.
Forever turning, switching places. How do they get by?
Man fights for freedom, and we strive for immortality.
While sun and moon are stuck up high there, in captivity.
And all that they can do is gaze, and yearn for company.
But all that they can see ahead’s the Earth, happy and free.
They want to get together, so they start their endless chase.
To meet, ever so rarely, in that blessed, short embrace.
To us, it’s an event that seems like night during the day.
To them, it’s an occurrence that feels so blissful and gay.
They never asked to do this job, but no one hears their voice.
We never asked them anything, they never had a choice.
But dutifully these vast eternal bodies keep their shine.
They still provide us with the light, and ever so divine.
It’s funny when you realise we are taking them for granted.
Their endless grace with which we have become so disenchanted.
Sometimes I wish that we could help them, bring them down to Earth.
Where they can live a mortal life together, full of mirth.
I must say that I am pretty happy with how it turned out. It was a lot of fun to make, too! So fun that it made me stay up 'till extremely late.
- Evo
Bump :)
I haven't forgotten, I have just had stuff going on. I will try to get to it tonight.
Great job everyone. This was a touch one to judge.
YesNo: Nicely done, I quite enjoyed reading this one. It was both humorous and philosophical, and I thought cleverly done. I really liked the contrast between the two individuals in the poem. I could picture the scene within my mind.
EvoWarrior5: I thought this was a very interesting perspective of the Sun and Moon and I quite enjoyed it. It brought to mind some of the various different mythological stories about them. The idea of the sun and moon being captives in the sky and watching the freedom of people on earth with envy was interesting.
And the winner is.....
Pendragon: Really like this, there is some wonderful imagery here, and I really like the atmosphere this poem sets. I love the allusion to some long ago ancient rites. This time of year it brings me to mind of the first Winter Solstice celebrations. There were some beautiful and well crafted lines.
Thank you. The lines lead easily to ritual.
Let's see here: OK. the line is from Emily Dickinson: "Because I could not stop for Death, he kindly stopped for me."
Because I could not stop for Death,
He kindly stopped for me
To make me pause upon the path
I traveled anxiously.
And as we paused the world went by
Consumed along its way.
Could someone be that kind to me?
Wait for me every day?
Death, oh Death
The time has come to leave this life
that once belonged to me.
But I do not have time to stop
so Death, please stop for me.
My life has been a life that is
as good as life can be.
But Death, oh Death, thou cryptic shade,
I cannot stop for thee.
How pristine is this carriage that
rides ever through debris.
Now Death, oh Death, thou wondrous shade
please hear my cry, my plea:
I’ve packed my bags, said my goodbyes,
I’m ready to be free.
But I do not have time to stop
so Death, please stop for me.
Death is known for his kindness and as such he stops here and there,
Takes care of passengers who have lost their way.
He checks into old folk homes, so I've heard.
He looks after the atrophied.
I met him once, in the park, he was sad.
He said, this business of mine is not always easy.
How do I go on, he asked.
With the weight of life and this damn heavy cape.
I assured him, and Death I said, no one wants your job.
It's uncool, and plus I bet the pay stinks.
I offered him a ride back to his motel.
He was good enough to say, well I'll help pay for gas.
I couldn't wait too long, seeing I had life to do.
But he kindly waited for me.
I suppose he might even give me a few extra years out of that.
A few lousy years, perhaps.
Not sure he had much of a sense of humor.
Happy new year and bump!
Only YesNo used the exact quoted line, which is the purpose of this contest. Congrats, YesNo!
Oh I thought that you could change up the line and still conform to the rules provided your poem fits the theme. Shame.