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I don't know if I should ask, but how can any of you be "very happy" with all of the really AWFUL things that happen in the world? There's an entire continent starving. Human trafficking exists. We're killing the planet. If you live in a city, you walk past homeless drug-addicted people every day. Things are really bad (not to mention CUNFUSING, which is obviously what gets to me). How can you be happy when things are so wrong? Why SHOULD we strive to be happy?
I know I am going to regret this but here goes...
Basically people are selfish, but it goes further than that. The way I see it is this, there was a time when I made myself physically sick on a not infrequent basis over the social injustices and poverty and all in the world that I had no control over, being miserable about it doen't change the fact the world stinks it just slows us doen in any attempt to make it better. I personally think you need t make the best with hat you have be happy about it and yes very pollyanna but a little spreading of happiness and goodwill does more good than spreading misery and guilt. I know most of the homless druggie alchies living between the curry mile and central library in manchester by site or o day hello to. I even know how a couple of them like their coffee and I thin they would rather be treated like norml people and have a laugh or two with whatever charity you are handing out, a spoon of sugar and all that.Quote:
Originally Posted by JuniperWoolf
It seems like you felt just like how I currently do. If mankind were REALLY selfish, then why would we feel that way? I hear people saying that crap all the time, and I don't think that we are selfish. If we were, then how do you explain guilt? I've asked around, and none of my psych professors can give me a reason why guilt is beneficial to an indevidual (beyond the old "everything for the sake of the group" evolutionary cooperation theories, which are overly-fit and lacking). I often think that we SHOULD feel bad, because most other poeple who aren't in the first world have no choice, not to mention a lot of people who are starving to death and losing their homes in rich nations. Most people who exist in the world have to deal with deplorable conditions, and the only way to stop that is to confront it head on, and to stop pretending that it doesn't exist. I'm not talking about charity, I'm talking about fundamental change. If everyone felt as sick as I very often do, things would happen. I don't care if people have to be guilted into opening their eyes, as long as they do. I also don't see how me being happy and bubbly in any way helps people who are miserable. I think that that "goodwill, if you love your life then you put a little bit more love in the world" idea is a whitewash: it's people who just happen to be lucky enough to live in desireable conditions justifying their position so that they can live comfortably (I am NOT(!!!) attacking you, Nightshade).
Edit: I don't mean to preach, I just really do want your input. These things often bother me a lot.
I don't think feeling "bad" is helpful, though, JuniperWoolf. If you truly feel that way then I think you should choose a cause you find worthy and work toward a fundamental change in that area.
It is the wise person who can look around them and really see all that is in the world, the good and the bad (and the ugly) and not let them affect them adversely, but not be blind to these things either.
And your friend, motherhubbard, is unusual. I think there is a belief in this country that we should be like her and if we only put our minds to it, we would. I have lived with someone who has experienced genuine depression, and it just doesn't always work that way.
I believe there is something to the idea of thinking positively, however. I have read that thinking or talking each day of good things in our lives does seem to bring about a more positive mindset.
I voted for "rather happy." Like Scher I need to take steps to change my job. I work in a highly stressful atmosphere. I did look around this summer, but there is not a lot available at the moment.
Oh, and I just had two teeth pulled, so today I'm "not very happy." :D
Ouch! Poor Qimi. Hope you feel better.Quote:
Originally Posted by qimissung
Thank you! So do I! :)
Happiness is something immeasurable and incalculable. You cannot rate the level of happiness the way a seismographic measurement is used. Or there is no barometer to gauge it.
Yet I say that happiness has somewhat to do with stress as well. As regards stress level I feel that those residing in metropolitan cities a have higher levels of stress than those who dwell in village communities or those who work mired in cornfields live comparatively a happier and a little more unstressed life. Not that there is no stress, there is plenty but not as deep and harrowingly intense with those who live in mega cities
As happy as i want to :-)
One does not look too far to witness horrible things... And I am sure almost all of us have enough "tragedy" in our lives to provide enough material for soap writers for at least three seasons.Quote:
Originally Posted by JuniperWoolf
However, it is important to stress here that "happiness" does not necessarily mean going out to party at all costs. Like Qimi above me mentioned, we can still be aware of others' miseries without losing the faith... Be aware and do something about those actively while still keeping our head above the water.
I was happy a little time ago, and now suddenly the barometer of happiness, if measurable at all, has gone down.
I was happy to eat something and when the eating was over that kind of happiness got over.
I voted for "rather happy". Something inside me doesn't allow me to feel "very happy".. I try to see the good side in everything. An intelligent and skilful person transforms losses into profits. I educated myself to not feel overly troubled when I am afflicted with sickness or a loss in wealth.In the past I used to suffer because I used to set too high expectations. Not anymore! :)
The OP:Quote:
Originally Posted by motherhubbard
I thought I knew the definition of happiness. I don't.
Right now? Ridiculously happy, to a level I didn't know possible! But, it wasn't always so, so take heart. If "stupidly content" can happen to me, it can to you as well.
I'll try to keep it in mind http://smiles.kolobok.us/artists/jus...C_thinking.gifQuote:
Originally Posted by dafydd manton
No reason why not, Max! No reason at all.
I'm satisfied and content with life.
Happy as I began this post: desolate on finishing.
A lot happier than yesterday. The I.R.S. is going to give me a refund. :hurray:
This one was difficult.
I put "rather happy" because I'm content, but I'm more stoic than anything.
(Hence why my stepfather told me I have a heart of stone because I didn't cry at my grandfather's funeral).
'cause people often want us to cry in public.Quote:
Originally Posted by faithosaurus
Things I would like to improve in myself include to not so swift to reply without first checking the membership date or country of origin of posters.
I've made a few throw away comments and cracked witticisms that I later think get misinterpreted as gnarly (probably not, but I'd like to stop feeling that way)
Other than this slight tinge of regret I'm like the tip of the iceberg and I'm about to post the first chapter of my new novel (criticise it whist it's in progress and be damned!)
I also stumbled upon a forgotten olde worke that I'd like to polish some.
I'm a bit worried about posting because I'm a bit of a perfectionist, and I really don't want to be seen to be showing off (curiously I don't care if others do, and actually like it when they are - so bring it on Showoffs, showoff whatcha got!)
I wrote a short short story which was just the barest essence of a tale, perhaps I should start with that?
Here goes:
It’ll never work.
Yes it will - you’ll see.
Or not, if it does.
When it does.
And when is when?
After this final adjustment...
He put the spanner down, placed his hand on the lever, and they looked into each others eyes for the last time.
And together they became invisible.
If you are only happy as the person you feel, does that mean happy polygamists are even more happy than happy monogamists?
Exactly. He wasn't exactly being fair about it, and honestly if I could cry over it I would have just so I wouldn't have looked as 'heartless' (though it really isn't all that heartless).Quote:
Originally Posted by Maximilianus
Sounds like it makes sense :pQuote:
Originally Posted by Silas Thorne
Also, some of us prefer to cry in private, under our own methods, away from the scrutiny of society and "society's crying procedures."Quote:
Originally Posted by faithosaurus
Yes we are, if promiscuity counts. It's its own reward after allQuote:
Originally Posted by Silas Thorne
Happiness is very subjective.Quote:
Originally Posted by motherhubbard
One man's (or woman's) happiness is another man's (or woman's) sorrow.
I think better question would be perhaps - what level or degree of freedom you feel in your life...just a thought...
Rather happy.
Not at all happy…
It is strange that people should tend to measure their happiness by how much they want, or, rather, don’t want. They say, I don’t want much, I am satisfied, and therefore I am happy. Yet, I have always found deep unhappiness rooted in my lack of desire. Or, perhaps what makes me unhappy is a perverted want of nothing that can never quite be satisfied.
I do believe that you are responsible for making yourself happy, yet happiness can only be achieved if circumstance has enabled you to achieve it. There are clear cases where circumstances prevent people from procuring those things necessary for their happiness. Thus, I don’t think that happiness is wholly a matter of “working hard at it,” for some people it’s just impossible.
Because by being unhappy you’re making the world stink that much more.Quote:
Originally Posted by JuniperWoolf
some days are better than the others.
i'll take my happiness where i can find them.
I chose rather happy because I won't be very happy
until there is no more child abuse, injustice, natural disasters,
consumerism, ecological irresponsibility, thieves, war, etc etc etc...
...perhaps I'm overthinking it :nopity: