Ha-ha! The Wolf is Back!

Poetic License on How to Make Love to Other Species
... derived from a poem by Wolf Larsen

A giant symphony reminiscent of Holst

hurtles out of a public toilet -

jerking you into the universe,

a universe of psychotic bright colours

made of kaleidoscopic Paisley prints -

spermatozoa whose origin sprang from

the trans-gendered Lady Liberty's scrotum

The second movement begins inside an

Orchestral Hall located inside

Charlie Manson’s skull; a skull sown in

a fallow field by an issue of God -

A Cannibalistic Concerto in Death Minor

is played by a cabal of giant pineapples &

oranges & watermelons with splayed legs

and arms askew; a fugue for the segue to come

Floating in a piece of installation art

transcending time and space at the prestigious

Museum of Mass Shootings located conveniently

inside a McDonald's restaurant that resides

in Uncle Sam's anus: We are the star child...

Fertile

it's a rainy day

the music becomes a poem

becomes forever

Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
tailor

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

The Great Big Giant Know Where of Everyone’s Lives
A poem by Wolf Larsen

All the musical toilets of the world are singing your song
While 8,000 Michael Jackson clones dance around you
As you sit on a toilet in a painting at the Louvre while the crowds of tourists watch
You in the painting ****ing Demopublican & Republicrat political speeches into the airwaves
But then the music turns left at the street corner and suddenly
The dreams of 1960s psychedelic space aliens
Are touching you with exotic languages all over your naked body
And one nuclear submarine after another is entering the giant vagina in the sky
Because only the Flying Squirrels in Baroque masterpiece paintings
Understand us, they understand the endless noisy hallways running
Through this poem, I mean after all inside of each one of the eggs on the supermarket shelves
Is a different Universe of S&M factories where the sexy naked space aliens
whip each other with Blue Sky,
Blue Sky being the place where
All your transvestite George Washington love dolls build
Endless tropical planets that float through the air in your apartment
While giant Shakespearean dildos with legs recite the
Decapitated bourgeois heads on pikes being paraded through the streets of the world
After the happy Guillotine Shakespearean plays performed with anal sex porn actors
And then I drink the vagina juices out of political speeches
And I touch the poems with as much sex as
A polar bear jacking off to the presidential elections
And the poem ends in a big splash of spermatozoa

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen


Surrealistic literature as comedy:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BC0XawSAeRY

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

This is a prose poem. There are no line breaks.

How to Play the Clarinet After World War 3
A poem by Wolf Larsen

In a public hospital in a third world country naked zombies run up & down the hallways playing tuberculosis & jazz while the flamingos hang upside down from the ceilings and recite the alphabet in a McDonald’s language and all the light bulbs in the ceiling sing genital warts to you and the guests visiting the patients are all presidents of foreign nations on other planets and the guests are all reciting hemorroids out of their mouths while they do the hubba hubba with their hands and then the ceiling disappears to reveal a sky full of masturbating orangutans dressed up as angels and the floor disappears to reveal 10,000 levels of hell and all of the devils from hell climb up into the public hospital and now they’re running up & down the hallways with the naked zombies and that's when all the patients get up from their beds and begin dancing Hiroshima & Nagasaki with all of the nurses and giant vaginas are floating up into the air from under the skirts of the nurses and all of the vaginas floating in the air are hissing & hissing and then everybody's penises begin growing out of their crotches and all of the penises are hissing & hissing and Abraham Lincoln is there playing the drums and the King of the Zulu tribe in Africa is on vocals singing ketchup & mustard and then all of the devils & the zombies begin eating each other while the patients & nurses begin urinating on each other in erotic Joy and then giant worshipping Idols of my high school classmate R Kelly are placed at the end of each hallway and all the zombies & devils begin worshipping R Kelly while they **** each other out of their buttholes and then everybody's buttholes begin singing classical rock music 24 hours a day 7 days a week while everyone eats nuclear missiles for breakfast lunch & dinner and then the Pillsbury Doughboy begins giving God a blowjob and the wind carries the planet Earth away...

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

This is a prose poem. There are no line breaks.

Poem Title: White Sheets Covering Police Uniforms When the Democrats Controlled the South and the Black People Didn't Have Guns to Defend Themselves from the Klu Klux Kockroaches because of Gun Control Laws Passed by the Democrats but What Does that have to Do with Drinking Beer with Cannibalistic Zombies on a Saturday Night with Transvestite Hooker Space Aliens and McDonald's Hamburgers Flying thooough the Air?? Ooohhh Yuuuum Delicious??
A poem by Wolf Larsen

I woke up this morning and my Dick was an Eiffel Tower hanging upside down from the ceiling - and my Eiffel Tower Penis was ejaculating impressionism all
over the viewers of this poem - and 6 billion people on the streets of the world are watching my Eiffel Tower Penis ejaculating impressionism all over them -
and now there’s 100 clones of me in my rented room all chanting “LET’S ALL **** EACH OTHER NOW! LET’S ALL **** EACH OTHER NOW!! LET’S ALL ****
EACH OTHER NOW!!! - and that’s when my hands started playing classical music with god's Penis - and my hands & god’s Penis are now creating a Handel baroque concerto inside the Holy Church of the Virgin Mary’s Pussy - (don’t churches feel like giant vaginas?) - and then Goofy the cartoon dog started humping my mother while I watched - and Goofy the dog while he humped my mother was explaining philosophy to me - and Goofy's lecture about philosophy while he humped my mother was absolutely fascinating!! - and it was so fascinating that Alaska floated off the planet Earth and into one of Salvador Dali's paintings - (Salvador Dali never really died, he just moved to the planet Pluto where he paints all of the classical music you hear on the radio) - and of course all the 10,000 Republicrat & Demopublican madmen you hear all screaming on the radio are all part of some BroadwaY-hip-hOp-raP-Musical that was choreographed by the same people that designed the Boeing 737 Max airplane - so now all of us the poet & the readers we're all riding on a Boeing 737 Max airplane from this poem into one of Salvador Dali's paintings - and on the way we discover turbulence and somehow wind up flying into Donald Trump's Anus - inside of Donald Trump's Anus is of course all of the classical music that you can eat!! - especially on crack cocaine Thursdays - crack cocaine Thursdays are when the conductor of the symphony orchestra (who is a crackhead) conducts the orchestra into the Land of Hundreds of Giant Toilets! - especially when you get some high ceilings & exposed brick & superb interior decorating with your favorite war - yiippeee!! - so don't forget to support the troops while you sing the national anthem before a football game - especially if the football game is between a bunch of naked Martians and some crack-cocaine addicts dressed up as colorful high-heeled hookers - because that's what football & the national anthem & crack-cocaine hookers in high heels are all about - it's all about the drone strikes and the poetry and the hamburger and fries with a dessert of mushroom clouds up the nose - because clearly your belly buttons do not belong to you all! - they belong to the doo-doo in the alleyway from the ever-increasing hordes of homeless people - so everyone please hang your testicles from the flagpole with the red white & blue toilet paper proudly waving in the air and praise the lord for “white privilege” on $7.25 an hour and place your penis in the overhead compartment as we fly off into the beautiful skies of Iran on this highly advanced piece of equipment called a Boeing 737 Max while the Iranians & Americans shoot giant spermatozoa flyyying through the sky at each other, oh, yeah, would you like some animal rights with that? Don’t be wearing fur to the war!! Oh God I’m so horny for some non-GMO loco-ly sourced responsibly grown Whole Foods because “unions are herpes”! Me so very very horny for some Whole Foods!!! Beep-beep!!

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

From my poetry channel on YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uCjf7FhkdmQ

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

10 Trillion Albert Einsteins in My BallSack Waiting for You!
A Poem by Wolf Larsen

All the blue in this poem is flirting with a painting!
All the words in this poem are swimming into you!
And now your stomach & your bootyhole is filled with all the squirming words of poetry
That sleep with you and dream with you and ejaculate with you
Because war & ejaculations are always!
And the red in this poem is dedicated to you!
With your 3,000 scrotums lining the walls
Of the local Museum of Trench Digging Through Other People's Brains
Because other people's brains are the macaroni & cheese of Blues music
Because the music is where the floating vaginas are!
Because all the thousands of floating vaginas inside the music
Scare all the people into having three faces each!
It's sort of like royal weddings with diarrhea analysis from news media commentators
While the soldiers jump out of your ears and conquer the bathroom
Because all bathrooms throughout the world have to be conquered by the United States Army!
Especially when the weather outside is plastic love dolls flying through the air!
And what about the Great Phalluses of all of the Greek Gods of the Trailer Parks? -
The trailer parks of antiquity!
Where six packs of beer on a Saturday Night create thousands of civilizations in our minds...
And the famous chef Julia Child jumps out of the poem and declares that
It’s time to Eat Out at the Queen of England’s 90 year old vagina!
And the asses & elephants (politicians) jump out of the poem and declare that
The War on Belgium or Iran or Mars or Russia or China or Timbuktu
Will protect America from your dog licking his balls...
And then the poem swallows the planet earth!

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

Watching Poetry Videos of Immaculate Conception Theater while My Right Hand Creates Art with the Giant Writing Instrument Between my Legs
A poem by Wolf Larsen

Inside of the world's greatest & biggest butthole
Is where poetry is born!
Because poetry is the greatest of all majestic farts!
Poetry is the greatest fart of all mankind!
And a poet writes his Grand Poetry inside of a humongous toilet bowl of exquisite taste!
Because this is the Land of a Thousand Humongous Toilet Bowls!
Where poets turn words into the most scatological sculptures of art!
Poetry is where words become gigantic lizards!
Because all poets are gigantic lizards!
And the grand fantasies of words that they create
Are the high art of McDonald's Big Macs rolling down the lines of a poem
Because all poems should be written on the most grandiose toilet paper!
And when I read a prestigious toilet paper roll of poetry
I simply have to ejaculate all over the public toilet
Because all my ejaculations are poetry!
And I always leave my white gooey poetry in the public toilet for the next person to see!
And they graciously thank the poet for leaving behind the gooey white mess of poetry!
And then they dip their fingers into my white gooey poetry
And taste the delicious kingdom of my words!

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

The Poet Sitting on His Throne of Human Skulls Judging the Human Race
A poem by Wolf Larsen

While the corpse of god hangs from the ceiling
I sit on my Throne of Human Skulls
And I drink God's Fantastic Piss out of cans of Budweiser
While I recite the poetry of American bombs falling from the sky all over civilians
Then the birds in the sky sing giant sky-high flowers growing out of all of our buttholes
And all the people jump out of the pictures & paintings in the museums
And all these people are now thronging around me on My Throne of Human Skulls
And they All SHOUT huge praise to the mountain of used toilet paper called Washington DC
And I Wolf Larsen am proclaimed the Sultan of the Human Imagination
While around me fly giant insects from Salvador Dali's imagination
And the Greek Gods parachute out of the sky
And the Greek Gods gather around me and pull out their green & blue phalluses
And honor Me by peeing on Me as they recite all the huge everything that I am becoming!
And the poetry jumps out of my anus and flies around the room
And suddenly the walls of the room are filled with the giant words of poetry that are
Flying around the walls of the room in English & Arabic & Spanish
And suddenly everyone is living inside of the poem
And everyone is dying inside of the poem
And everyone is fornicating inside of the poem
Inside of the poem is endless generations of human fornification
Inside of the poem is endless generations of human struggle
Being told by the words that are flying around-&-around the walls of the room
And suddenly the reader is swallowed by the poem
And suddenly the reader becomes the poem
And suddenly the reader is crashing about in thousands of different directions
The reader is now simultaneously flying through all the different galaxies inside the poem
The reader is now a cubist painting as large as the universe
The reader is now flying around-&-around himself
The reader sees millions of himselfs all flying around him
No more then the phrases of poetry are born inside the reader's head
Then the phrases of poetry are flying in all directions throughout the Universe
And then the reader dies
But the reader keeps living inside of the poem...

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

Rebuild America with Bipartisan Washington DC Diarrhea!
Brought to You by Charmin Ultra Soft Toilet Paper!
A poem by Wolf Larsen

I arrive at the art gallery opening Gala celebration
And I observe bourgeois pigs & their anorexic call-girl wives at a trough full of caviar
And then I pull out my paintbrush-phallus and I urinate thousands of years of art all over them - yippeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
And then I urinate Pablo Picasso's Guernica over all the cops in America as well!
And what about my spermatozoa?! My spermatozoa has created great civilizations!
Even the smiling-swirling-skyscrapers want to be impregnated by my spermatozoa!
My spermatozoa is made out of billions of Michelangelos & Picassos & Salvador Dalis all charging up all your vaginas & buttholes!
All the dogs & cats in America love it when I ejaculate My postmodern art all over them!
Because postmodern art & literature is made out of Wolf Larsen’s spermatozoa!
Wolf Larsen’s spermatozoa is the Great Hiroshima of the art world!
The contents of my ballsack is a great boiling pot of arts & literature
Waiting to explode the great 21st century all over the face of the reader!
And suddenly all the readers turn into pink & purple leprechauns dancing to my phallus-paintbrush exploding 10 Million miles of bizarre imagery all over them!
And that is why the earth goes around the Sun - because
I am the White Trash God of literature!
And that's why all the polar bears in the zoo love Me!
Because I am all the Tangerines of Tomorrow!
And whenever all the cockroaches in the sewer call My Great Name
You know that All the 45 presidents of the United States of America will dress up as transvestite love dolls and suck me off!
And when the poem ends you will take off your clothes and
Fire up all your thousands of vibrators and blast off to
All of Salvador Dali's paintings! Because the cancer in your body loves you!
Because the Furious waves of the ocean want to drown you with love!
The nuclear bombs falling on you from the sky will give you all their love!
The approaching day of the mushroom clouds is the most delicious wedding cake the human race will ever eat!
And this next election you too can choose whether a Demopublican or Republicrat
President or a black or a white President or a woman or a male or a gay or straight President starts World War 3 is
less important than what kind of toilet paper you use to wipe your *** with!
Because I myself prefer to wipe my *** with Charmin Ultra Soft!
Charmin Ultra Soft - the official toilet paper of World War 3!

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

Riding Flying Leprechauns into the Purple Universe of Giggling Belly Buttons
A poem by Wolf Larsen

Everyone in the human race is now being swallowed by the ever hungry robots!
The hungry robots are growing out of all our belly buttons - and our belly buttons sing to us of the sunshine! - and we walk through giant forests of pubic hairs together - and the flying cities jump out of the mouth of the television set and suddenly you're surrounded by thousands of television sets all talking to you of throwing rolls of toilet paper from one planet to another...
So you start running with millions of robots towards the sunlight, but suddenly you're all attacked by flying German Shepherds that are all singing one of Verdi's operas together, so you serve one of Verdi's operas with an orgy, and all the people on the bus jump unto the Moon and now everybody on the bus is trapped inside somebody else's imagination, meanwhile the bus is headed towards the big black hole in the middle of the universe (which is inside a painting in someone's attic) so now everyone has a tombstone growing out of their head and giant execution squads of flying insects are headed your way so you hide inside of millions of your own brains that are all floating out of boiling pot on the stove in Dutch Harbor Alaska, so now it's time to fly off to your old age and have a barbecue there, you're barbecuing a cat on the grill and while you barbecue the cat it’s telling you all about growing up in Brooklyn back when Brooklyn existed only inside Woody Allen's mind, but you can hardly hear the cat on the grill talking because all the flying leprechauns around you are bashing buildings together as they sing the national anthem of bouncing boobs, meanwhile a porn actor with a really big paint brush is painting the Virgin Mary with lots of Immaculate Conception, so do you want some barbecue sauce with your cat?

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

A crazy spontaneous poem performed outside (from my poetry channel on YouTube).

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zTjkZqC_ygc

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

You So DaNciNg-dAnCinG-DaNciNg with Thousands-of-Your-Clones!
A poem by Wolf Larsen

First I have sex with all the trees on the planet!
And now my brains is inside of your brains!
While My Penis flies through the air around & around your head!
I’m now lost inside millions of mazes of phrases of poetry!
So I pull all 20th century art out of my butt!
And I now ejaculate the entire English royal family all over Alaska!
Then the polar bears have sex with the entire English royal family!
The Alaskan natives in their igloos are busy painting tropical sunsets with their genitals!
Meanwhile, the tsar of 21st Century Russia is playing musical governments
While American candidate to Blow-Up-the-World Elizabeth Warren is fantasizing of the day when as Commander-in-Chief
She can pull out tanks & nuclear bombs & battleships out of her vagina
And make the world safe for American democratic Big Mac Coca-Cola & fries!
While all the feminists & liberals dance in the streets to Elizabeth Warren’s speeches flying out of her anus - hip hip hurrrraaayyyy!!
Meanwhile big musical farts erupt out of all the giant phallus horns being played by all the hipsters!
And huge fireflies are flying out of all of the murals on all the walls of the city being painted by the mass legions of homeless…
And the subway train flys from cloud to cloud in the sky and endless skyscrapers erupt out of everyone's crotches and millions of planets are revolving & revolving around Einstein's head as Einstein's hand masturbates uncle sam's Penis and then uncle sam's Penis ejaculates a piano concerto all over a painting called “The Big Whorehouse Known as Washington DC” by the great postmodern painter Igor the Magnificent Ball Scratcher and about two dozen squirrels on top of your bald head are all playing the Pink Bubblegum Symphony which was of course written by a homeless man that's sleeping on a subway train that's rolling off to heaven and all of the angels in heaven are singing a choir of Immaculate Conception orgies to the homeless man as he mounts the Virgin Mary on top of a mountain of used condoms as the Virgin Mary sings All Of The Glory of a new washing machine in a television commercial made back when everyone had Christian churches growing like herpes sores out of their Penises and all Penises were illegal back then because of the Christian-Feminist Moral Majority Tribunal of the Mayflower that sank into one of Percy Shelly's brains floating amongst millions of Shelly's brains inside of a surrealist painting which was painted with lots of high class syphilus by the great surrealist Marilyn Monroe with the Big Penis under her White Dress during her porn acting career with Robert & John Kennedy back when the Kennedy Brothers would dance to all of the different kinds of salad dressing on the supermarket shelves, would you like to go to a different Universe with me? Well, let’s all hop on a giant flying penis and goooooooo!!!

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

A Musical Nightmare called Everyday Life
A poem by Wolf Larsen

Millions & millions of Wolf Larsen's penises are growing all over the solar system
And all of the giant insects flying in outer space are
as happy as a billionaire war profiteer sitting on top of a mountain of human skulls and
Skipping dingbats sing too much yellow down the street as
The Sun in the sky turns into a big yellow testicle and
Ants are crawling through your mind while
Huge tanks are rolling out of your penis and
Flying thoughts are escaping from everyone's heads and
A huge yellow is splashing out of the canvas
and across the solar system
While the Greek gods play pool with all the planets in the Solar System
And endless hordes of screaming civilians fleeing the war zones are
The notes in a screaming jazz song that
Never ends
And then hell explodes out of the ground
And the devil jumps in bed with your wife and
Nine months later your wife gives birth to the Chicago Symphony Orchestra and
Your child is a symphony orchestra of insects that
Sing all night long under a moon that keeps falling out of the sky
And
Huge blue erupts from your thoughts and and all over the canvas
While all the yellow background screams to all the fish swimming through this poem and
All the red in your head is bleeding out of your imagination and onto the canvas and
The canvas stares back at you with thousands of crazy eyeballs eating through you
and your daily life is a prison cell of endless work and the subway and a rented room and endless bills
And then a bunch of poetry starts crashing through the walls
And you create poetry all over the canvases with a paintbrush
And you ejaculate the poetry all over the music with a saxophone
and you run out into the streets naked to be one with the poetry…

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

How to Eat Human Feces!
A poem by Wolf Larsen

Our belly buttons begin loudly prophesizing of the day when Elliott Carter will come back from the dead and conquer the planet Earth with the New York City subway system!
And then Kubla Khan comes down from the sky on a flyyying surfboard!
And Kubla Khan announces that Elliot Carter shall be worshipped as the Purple & Pink Goddess of the Classical Music in all of Our Genitals!
And all the mermaids are jumping out of the oceans and into this poem!
And now the reader is swimming with thousands of beautiful mermaids in this poem!
And all the birds that live in our genitalia begin singing!
And huge everything happens!
As all the kings & queens go back to living in their trailer parks
And the transgender Nancy Reagan clones with huge penises begin creating giant palaces floating in the sky!
As the gods of marijuana speak of lesser evil politics to all the rabbits hopping in our heads!
And all of the thousands of Kubla Khans in pink dresses
Are dancing to the rhythms of the rabbits hopping in our heads!
As the German Shepherds in sexy pink lingerie fly giant ladybugs Into this poem!
And huge forests of marijuana are growing out of this poem!
And then the captain of the nuclear submarine begins conducting the poem!
And the captain of the nuclear submarine is none other than Captain Crunch of your favorite childhood breakfast cereal, which you ate as the air raid sirens played World War 3 accompanied by the loud disco music being played by your neighbor and the moaning opera music being sung by the 10,000 clones of your wife having sex with God, and God is impregnating the 10,000 clones of your wife with as much abStract-eXpResSionisT-diSco-daNciNg as any Koala bear can find, meanwhile,,, millions of birds are flying out of your penis and fertilizing the Earth with Jimi Hendrix songs, and then the reader ejaculates all over the poem and walks away...

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

From the Wolf Larsen Poetry Channel:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KEhfPhfiQWs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KEhfPhfiQWs

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

Wolf Larsen Conducting the Symphony of the Guillotine at the New York Philharmonic
A poem by Wolf Larsen

I am the revolution of Wolf Larsen!
I am constantly overthrowing myself!
I am building my poetry with your excrement!
I'm building my poetry with mountains of dead bodies!
And the mountains of dead bodies talk to me!
They talk to me of Alfred Scnittke creating fauvist paintings with his music!
Meanwhile, I Wolf Larsen compose the Symphony of the Guillotine!
In the music The Guillotine sings like The Liberation of Humankind!
Some people embrace trees -
I embrace the guillotine!
I am the Robespierre of poetry!
I am the Spartacus of painting!
I pull out this Giant Paintbrush rising out of My Crotch
and My Paintbrush urinates the Great Philosophy of Wolf Larsenism all over your
Minimalist-constipated-installation-”art”
That is nothing more than a giant toilet bowl of laughs at the art museums & galleries!
And now this poem hijacks the world!
This poem urinates creativity all over the planet!
All the animals in the zoo daNce tO mY pOetrY
That's being sung by all of the hopping kangaroos of the Evil Empire of Joy!
And the stoplights blasting red yellow & green with the beat of my poetry
Understand that I am the Messiah of All that is Bizarre!
I am the Executioner of all that is stale & musty & boring!
I am the Conductor of All Majestic Chaos Throughout the Universe!
And that's why all the politicians of both political parties eat my ***!
Because my *** taste like caviar!
Let the bourgeoisie eat my *** too!
And let god lick My Balls!
Because I am the chef of a most delicious cannibal soup!
I am so much Mozart & Beethoven & Elliott Carter stabbing and stabbing each other with music!
The Cannibal Transvestites of Transylvania build sky high sculptures of Wolf Larsen to honor Me!
And the giant sky high sculptures of Wolf Larsen stare down God!
And god falls to his feet and begs for My forgiveness!
And all my readers Kiss Me! They piss on my naked body as I shout out for more! And everyone loves to lick my feet! Now dress Me up as a woman and let Me **** your wife! Because I am so much poetry!
I am forever!

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

Using surrealistic literature to create comedy - from The Wolf Larsen Comedy Channel on YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F1EkNNnAqrY
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F1EkNNnAqrY

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

Castrated Elephant Testicles Reciting Poetry All Night Long
A poem by Wolf Larsen

The trains roll in-&-out of our genital warts
And the dolphins jump out of the water and unto the thousands of moons
And the crowded streets fly off into the abyss
And the poem dances with the French Revolution
And the aristocracy & the guillotine dance together
And the common people are dancing to the rhythms of the guillotine going up-&-down
And the painters are dipping their paintbrushes into the blood flowing from the guillotine
And they're creating paintings that cause everything to howl with color
And the images jump out of the paintings and create a thousand songs
And the floating ballsacks of outer space are calling to you
While all the readers are wandering through the alleyways of the poem
And the flying phrases of poetry
Cause the planet Earth to crash into a television commercial about hemorrhoids
While our heads are floating into poems being written by space aliens
And the sky collapses from too much music
And then the poem sweeps all the solar systems away into a different universe
While our own solar system becomes trapped in a painting
That's being created from the paintbrush of 10,000 howling monkeys
And then the poem disappears into somebody else's head...

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

From my poetry channel on YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uZ5U8np-IRY
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uZ5U8np-IRY

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

Donald Trump & 535 Congressmen Having Sex with Millions of Clones of Your Mother on the Subway Train
a poem by Wolf Larsen

Giant waterfalls of beer are descending down from Jesus Christ’s anus in heaven
As all of the cartoon characters from Disney fall to their knees and watch in awe
While swans with humongous penises swim down the waterfall of beer falling from heaven...
And purple vagina airplanes are flying everywhere!
While all the delicious puppies of Asia keep chanting “Eat me! Eat me!”
Especially since 1000 sexy clones of your mother are sitting on the subway with you
As you travel to the land of millions of naked Alice in Wonderland clones
who sit on top of huge brightly-colored magical mushrooms...
And this is where they install your feet on top of your head - and they put one of your eyeballs on your testicles - and they put your other eyeball on your butt
So that you can see all the delicious music streaming out of puppies-on-plates as far as the eye can see
And one of your ears will be attached to somebody else's scrotum
So that you can hear all the blue & yellow & red in the paintings
And your other ear will be lost inside of the First Lady’s vagina
(It has something to do with impeachment) or maybe it has something to do with
Sharing delicious puppies with all of the talking 6-foot penises that
Jump out of your imagination and have dinner with you everyday,
But only if all the spermatozoa that's inside the Moon
Impregnate this poem...

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

Billions and Billions of Toilets Floating in Outer Space: a Wolf Larsen Odyssey
A poem by Wolf Larsen

I woke up this morning having to take a ****, but my toilet was upside down on the ceiling…
Suddenly, giant polar bears were riding hot air balloons floating out of my *******...
And then thousands of my heads began growing out of the walls...
And all of my heads had thousands of planets in their faces...
And on each one of those planets was a different reader standing
Amidst a sea of blood of the Native American peoples and their screams were
Reaching all the ears attached to the buttocks of all the people in the
Paintings being created by stand-up comics whose paintbrushes are flying through the air as
The air raid sirens & hamburgers are opening the legs of all the call girls who
Are doing Fortune 500 Business with all of the fat old dinosaurs in suits
But then rocketships toooook off from all our eyeballs
And suddenly all the planets turn into giant eyeballs revolving around millions
And millions of suns that are the pin balls inside of giant pinball machines being played
By space aliens with huge penises sticking out of their shoulders (instead of heads)...
But what does that have to do with masturbating to bubble gum commercials?
Particularly when the floor becomes the solar system and now all of you are falling through the solar system while your ceiling becomes your insanity so you're falling up through your insanity into the Great Symphony that's always playing inside of the collective mind of the human race
And you can't find east or west because East or West has turned into beer
And your penis is in Montana
And while your penis is in Montana she's telling you about the Raspberry Symphony of Fornification
While all the giraffes & gorillas & mountain lions riding the subway train
Are looking at you and telling you about their day at the office
And then all the Native American peoples that were never born because of the genocide
Get on the subway train with you...
And they're all telling you about the big lollipop in between your ears
So now you’re floating up to the heaven full of sea creatures
And Your Penis is giving a speech about the intellectual pubic lice of iambic pentameter
While your belly button is thinking about Fernand Leger
And Uranus is wondering when this poem is going to end ???
But your testicles are vacationing in Miami
And your feet are wandering around Wisconsin Looking for your testicles
But your feet can't find your testicles because your eyeballs are floating in the toilet bowl
That’s hanging upside down from your ceiling
That's inside of a studio apartment that's inside of a building that's growing out of Barack Obama's buttocks
Like a giant butt hair….

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

Every One of my Poems is a Grand Cathedral that Honors Myself! The Great & Eternal Me!
A poem by Wolf Larsen

I build One Great Insanity on top of another!
Until all the great gothic buildings of this planet are growing out of this poem!
And the poem is growing out of my anus!
And my anus is growing out of a tree that's
Growing out of the end of the world that's
Exploding out of a musical canvas of
Millions of jazz soloists all singing
A Cubist rendition of the Brahms Symphony of Black Dildos
Going up-&-down to the beat of a surrealistic engine
Churning out as many heart attacks as God can swallow!
And now the poem grows millions of octopus tentacles
that are feeling all of our naked bodies
That are dancing to the fauvist rhythms of Caribbean orgies
being painted by all the pigeons in the park with magical paint brushes
Given to them by all the sadomasochistic painters in hell...
Because hell is where the greatest symphonies are born!
And Heaven & Hell play a great symphony together -
The Symphony of Cheating Wives Getting Impregnated!
And the 19th century leaps up and crashes all over the audience
Like a mighty sledgehammer smashing to pieces all that came before!
Because God loves to give blowjobs in Boystown!
Because the Neo-Nazi skinheads are a plague
That must be crushed with the Sherman's Marches of our boots!
And as we hang the Klu Klux cockroaches from the trees
The birds in the trees sing gleefully of the big yellow spermatozoa in the sky
That impregnates all the world!
And the ending of the poem gets on its knees and begs the poet
To piss on all the flower beds growing in the Super Yuppie neighborhoods of Chicago!
And the great piss of the poet fertilizes the Earth!
And now begins the Catholic desire that only the naked statues of ancient Greece can satisfy...
Because while the rabbi might say I'm Jewish (something to do with my mother's maiden name)
The Catholic runs inside of me like all the splashing spermatozoa of a seminary!
Because my Catholic spermatozoa shall crash across the universe
And impregnate all the space aliens of the universe with my poetry!
And all the space aliens shall give birth to my French-Catholic-Viking progeny
Who shall conquer everything in the universe with their
Extraterrestrial phalluses thrusting in-&-out of the literary & artistic & musical worlds
Like some great Intergalactic-Sex-Machine created by the
Mad scientist poet Wolf Larsen
Whose great penis shall satisfy the Fires of Want & Need & Lust
While the poet's spermatozoa plants the seed of a new civilization
In the open-legged soil of the great planet Earth!
Amen!
All Glory to the Poet!
The Poet Wolf Larsen - who is the one & only true god!

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

A Red White & Blue Prison from Sea to Shining Sea
A poem by Wolf Larsen

I write my poems with as many penises as I can find!
I build my giant palaces with all your castrated testicles!
Because of licorice vaginas in July!
Because of all the millions of comedians in my ballsack!
Because of all the Jackson Pollock dancers creating paintings down my street!
And that's why you are my giant red lollipop!
Because you understand all the sex laughing in the rain!
Even the porn actors in the White House love a good insanity!
Because words are my spermatozoa!
And when you swallow - my words - the rain laughs with us!
And then the Sun hits the world all day long with all it's yellow!
And the plants have sex with all the yellow ejaculating from the Sun!
And the Poet ejaculates all the sun's rays across the solar system!
And god is now dripping with the Poet’s great ejaculations!
And the President of the United States of America ****ing your wife
Is as patriotic as the red white & blue dog****
Jumping out of the anuses in the middle of the politician’s faces!
And all of this red-state blue-state diarrhea-talk
Might as well be the political syphilis of a falling American Empire
that's going to take the rest of the world down with it into
World War 3
And then all the words in the poem explode into the reader's head…

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

How to Fix the World After World War 3
A poem by Wolf Larsen

Every poem is a baroque disaster!
And time is jumping out of the poem at you!
While all the greatness of my doodoo assaults the English language!
Because my DooDoo is a new god to be worshipped!
Because my DooDoo will carry you to the rainbows of the first lady's tits!
All the English professors in the universities sing the praises of My DooDoo!
Because the falling snow is the summer of meth-amphetamine-jazz!
All being played right now by the existential cannibals on the moon!
When the sun is aligned with the giant orgy of all the Walt Disney cartoon characters!
And our hands are playing ghetto Mozart masterpieces!
When Saturn is aligned with Cleopatra's penis!
And the coffee tastes like the economies on other planets collapsing into
The Museum of Pornographic Politicians located
Somewhere north of the beginning of this poem where
The wild fruits talk human languages with
18-wheeler semi trucks crashing through
Giant spermatozoa cathedrals
Being built by all the characters in a thousand different novels
Who are all spreading delicious peanut butter all over Christianity together!
And that’s why the ending of the poem is made out of homelessness…

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

Here I am once again turning surrealistic literature into stand-up comedy:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jD-IAgDfqmQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jD-IAgDfqmQ

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

Some Words in the Frying Pan are Delicious!
A poem by Wolf Larsen


Last night the buildings jumped out of the hot dogs
And the automobiles drove through the phrases of poetry
And the nearly naked goddesses danced under the big testicle in the sky
While huge civilizations grew out of God's belly button
And the music was creating french fries all around us
And the fast-food workers were creating painting after painting
And the assembly line of paintings was rolling down the streets in your mind and creating huge everything!
And the streets are now falling down the sky!
And the hills are growing out of our heads!
And the Greek gods in the sky are all drunk with sex!
And a transvestite William Shakespeare serves me my Polish sausage with fries
While the corpse of the President of the United States of America is hanging from the ceiling
And while the President's corpse does sign language with his penis
All the customers in the fast food restaurant became a chorus
Singing about the sophisticated American culture of hotdogs & french fries & endless war
And the guillotine in the kitchen is now chopping off the heads of American aristocracy
And turning them into hot dogs - the most delicious hot dogs! - that are being served
To the Working Class People!
And all of the actors in the television commercials are clamoring for the end of the poem!
But all of the actors in the giant toilet bowl in the ceiling
Are explaining 1,000 years of philosophy to us
While we eat the flesh of the American aristocracy - yummy!
And the guitar player is playing Paul Cezanne's apples
And the reader is walking through the desert looking for the end of the poem
But the Poet is riding a spaceship from Boystown into a giant mountain of relish & mustard
And all of the beautiful gay men of Boystown are being recreated into neoclassical sculptures
By the fast-food workers who are all screaming for the poem to end
But somebody has mailed the Poet from Chicago to Kathmandu Nepal
And all of the imagery of Kathmandu Nepal is exploding out of a saxophone in New York City
And the A train of Manhattan full of black people going to Harlem somehow ends up in Southern Mississippi...
And all of the Democrats in white sheets in Southern Mississippi are waiting for the black people
So the black people ride a train to Chicago
But all the police in Democratic Chicago are waiting for black people in the train station…
And the cops in Chicago start doing to the black people pretty much the same thing as the Klu Klux Klan in Mississippi…
Oh, and then a white construction worker in a porta potty experiencing “privilege” as he takes a big smelly dump
Wipes his derriere with your bourgeois liberal orthodoxy...

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

Meh...obviously the ramblings of a narcissistic, self-obsessed, deranged mind.

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

An Ode to Your Wife's Vagina
A poem by Wolf Larsen

My symphonies are written with your blood!
My blood is made out of poetry!
And my hand & My Penis together compose the greatest symphonies ever written!
Even the fish in heaven worship My Penis!
All the other poets are merely dogs
That I eat
Because dogs are delicious!
The only thing more delicious than dog is My Poetry!
Beg me to eat your dog!
Beg me to eat your house!
Beg me to sire a new poet with your wife!
Because all your wives are notes in the most decadent luscious symphony!
Everything in the world was created by My Penis!
Because My Penis is greater than god!
Because My Penis is a great & almighty sculpture!
Now let's talk about your wife's Vagina -
Your wife's great & almighty Vagina!
Your wife's Vagina is the place where the space aliens & skyscrapers create strawberry jelly together!
Your wife's Vagina is the place where wild belly buttons grow!
All the top 40 songs on the radio are dedicated to your wife's Vagina!
And at the end of your wife's Vagina is where God & the Virgin Mary & Jesus Christ hold court!
Let us create great temples all over the world dedicated to your wife's Vagina!
The entrances to your wife’s Vagina will be art nouveau songs
And inside of the great temples to your wife's Vagina will be
Art nouveau buildings stretching for as far as the eye can see…
And all of the great musicians of the world
Will be playing the most pretty art nouveau madness inside of your wife's Vagina!
Because your wife's Vagina is the temple to the Erotic Saint Goddess of Immaculate Conception!
Long live your wife's Vagina!

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

Why would you copyright stuff you post on a site with a handful of readers Wolf? Saw one of your videos think you work best live. I love John Copper Clarke. I’m hoping you’ve followed his career. Have seen him live several times and fantastic. Wouldn’t read him though. Or more I have tried and it doesn’t work without the delivery. Think there is a parrallel.

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

The City of Asses
a poem by Wolf Larsen

Too many gray skies devouring my head
Somebody has stolen the Sun
The screaming babies warn of the approaching mushroom clouds
The dying people too poor for medical care become a river of corpses flowing past the horizon
And so many homeless
The rich drive by in their carriages of gold at 50 miles an hour
Their high-rise-palaces in the sky invading one working-class neighborhood after another
You practically have to rob an armored car to pay the rent
A hamburger costs 2 hours of the national minimum wage
Inside my “studio apartment” closet I write poems as wide as the Atlantic Ocean
I write with the gray ink of the sky
The spermatozoa in my ballsack giggle & laugh as I write my poems
I write my poems with my aches & pains
In this city with a new mayor nothing has changed
The old Richard Jackass Daley merely reincarnated himself as a black lesbian
And the prisons are filled with the wretched
The wretched who committed the “crime” of flying off to other planets with drugs
Or maybe the Tyrannosaurus Rexes in police uniforms planted the drugs on them
The filthy trains & buses crowded with tired people who work & work but get further & further behind on their bills
Such is the City of Asses
This city represented by the Democrats since the time of our great-grandparents
This City of Segregation
Where white & black & brown workers all stab each other with hostile glares
While the rich liberals in their highrise palaces look upon a beautiful field of blue called Lake Michigan
Those rats living in their palaces in the sky
Those cockroaches driving around in luxury automobiles
I want to leave
But my health flew away from me long ago
I'm just waiting to die in this hellhole of Two Cities
A hell for us
A heaven for those bourgeois aristocratic cockroaches

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

A Poem I Wrote Inside My Father's Ballsack 9 Months Before I was Born
A poem by Wolf Larsen

The space aliens in your apartment are dancing to Beethoven
While I myself am composing my great Symphony of Spermatozoa
And all the cats in the street are the chorus of my symphony
And all the cats are singing thousands of Jackson Pollock clones recreating the universe over & over again with their magical paint brushes
And the belly buttons are floating out of the tuba
And thousands of vaginas are crashing out of the trumpet every second
And penises are crawling out of the saxophone
And huge eyes are floating into the sky out of the trombone
And the French horn is playing your mother at a wife-swapping party 9 months before you were born
And then the chorus of cats is replaced by a chorus of frogs
And the chorus of frogs is singing years of solitude
And the sunset crashes across the sky
And the pirate ships sail out of our mouths
and into television commercials about hemorrhoids
While the subway trains roll around the symphony
And the symphony rolls around hundreds of paintings
That are being created by the great Phallus of the Poet
Who is inspired by all the chickens dancing their way to the gallows
To the beat of the disco music farting out of President George Washington's *******
And then thousands of pelicans begin flying out of George Washington's *******
While the black slaves dance across the South
Welcoming the Union Army...

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

From The Wolf Larsen Poetry Channel on YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cfytr6d4tqE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cfytr6d4tqE

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

The Chicago Symphony Orchestra Playing a Fauvist Canvas
A poem by Wolf Larsen

All the dogs in the world suddenly begin howling that they want to be eaten
And I begin creating my paintings with dog blood & dog feces & dog piss
And my painting swallows the readers
In each one of my paintings is thousands of other paintings
Add each one of my paintings leads from one universe into another
While I paint the violin creates so much red
The piano creates so much blue
The saxophone creates so many riots
And then the trombone French horn & tuba create space satellites dancing to
All the universe exploding out of the Poet's Penis
While all the store mannequins begin dancing to falling airplanes
And drive-by shootings add exclamation points to the music
And the poem is splattered with blood & paint & feces & piss
All splashing out at the reader
While the reader becomes a cubist universe crashing out in all directions
And the reader's thoughts wander through a universe filled with black coffee
And then army tanks begin moving through the reader's head
And mushroom clouds from World War 3 are falling out of the reader's ears
And the harp peacefully plays the mushroom clouds erupting across the planet Earth
While the tuba plays the impeachment circus in Washington DC
And huge pineapples with legs begin running down the streets screaming beer commercials at you
Then all the angels in heaven jump from the sky and commit suicide - their brains splattering all over the sidewalks like smashed tomatoes
And then the sun smashes through the gray sky
And fish swim out of your toilet and they're swimming through your apartment
And Pablo Picasso is painting all the walls of your apartment in thousands of nudes
And one of Wassily Kandinsky paintings smashes your ceiling into pieces
And the Wassily Kandinsky painting scatters the universe everywhere
And the Chicago Symphony Orchestra plays the universe scattering everywhere
And the reader is suddenly revolving around thousands of different suns in the universe
While huge hamburgers & fries all with legs begin walking into your apartment
And all the monkey politicians both Demopublican & Republicrat are on exhibit at the zoo
And then the violin slashes the poem in half
And the tuba ejaculates the poem into the sky…

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

How to Write Poetry Filled with STDs
A poem by Wolf Larsen

1000 Vladimir Putin & Barack Obama ballet-dancing-clones
Jump out of a Hieronymus Bosch painting
And the ballet dancing is being choreographed by Al Capone
And the reader is being painted on the ceiling by a crack-smoking Michelangelo
And the crack-smoking Michelangelo suddenly becomes a cannibalistic spaghetti
Being eaten by the portrait of the reader on the ceiling
Who's watching the homoerotic ballet of a thousand Putin & Obama clones
Dancing the internationally-renowned Ballet of Anal Sex
Being watched by an audience of Bourgeois buttocks dressed up as 19th century French royalty
As the Chicago Syphilis Orchestra in Wolf Larsen's ballsack
Plays the music that accompanies Dadaist pornography for space aliens masturbating across the universe
And the 1000 Putin & Obama baLLeT-daNcing-clOneS descend on the subway
Where they dance the dance of Hiroshima & Nagasaki through the subway cars
As the subway train races into a giant Wasilla Kandinsky painting
Being painted by the humongous paintbrush of god's Penis
As Jesus Christ has his Second Cumming all over America
And Christians throughout America dance in the Second Cumming of Christ
Raining down upon them in a gooey sticky red white & blue
While Santa Claus & Mickey Mouse have anal sex together
In the midst of all the baLLeT-dAnciNg-pUtiN-&-obaMa-cLoneS
And the Chicago Syphilis Orchestra starts playing black men hanging from ropes & sitting in electric chairs in the Democratic United States of America
And the reader is conducting the Chicago Syphilis Orchestra inside of Wolf Larsen's ballsack
While Wolf Larsen is off vacationing inside of an Andy Warhol painting
And then the Greek God Zeus who’s homeless on the streets of Chicago
Grabs a sledgehammer and smashes the poem into pieces…

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

The latest from The Wolf Larsen Poetry Channel on YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EvvY4oiz_SM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EvvY4oiz_SM

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

The Religion of Chocolate & Sex
A poem by Wolf Larsen

The morning jumps out of the saxophone
The saxophone ejaculates art all over the world
The drums create impressionism and then the drums create fauvism and then the drums create cubism
Meanwhile the singer is singing on top of Mount Everest
The singer is singing from the planet Mars
The singer is singing from a painting on your wall
Meanwhile the planet Earth becomes a huge ball of human misery floating in the singer’s song
So you begin eating all the planets in the universe
You begin playing with thousands of belly buttons
You fix a boring piece of installation art with a sledgehammer
And then you urinate all over minimalism & installation art
Meanwhile Uncle Sam snorts 200 countries up his nose
And the human race begins revolting in the streets against Uncle Sam & his puppet regimes
While the Democrats & Republicans crawling around Uncle Sam's pubic hairs
Swear allegiance to endless wars & endless prisons & endless corporate bailouts
And then the poem urinates fauvism & cubism & abstract expressionism all over minimalism
And now this poem throws the reader into endless paintings
This poem is thousands of symphonies all bashing into each other 24 hours a day 7 days a week all year long
While you sleep the poem screams at you in endless dreams & nightmares
While you **** the poem paints pronography all over your walls and all over the sky and all over the planets
This poem is always
And then an earthquake comes and crashes the poem all around you
And you try to hide behind an emotionless face
But the poem finds you and tears away your face
And suddenly you find yourself walking on thousands of different planets in the same moment
You find yourself having sex with millions of different species throughout the universe in this moment
You find yourself painting billions of different canvases in this one grand moment
You find yourself riding this poem into the universe
And then the poem begins combining 6,000 different human languages into one language of imagery
One huge language of imagery that’s splashing across arts and literature and music
And the human race is swallowed by arts & literature & music
And God surrenders to art
And God dies…

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

Richard Wagner Selling His Body on the Street Corner to Pay the Rent
A poem by Wolf Larsen

Richard Wagner jumps out of the solar system
And starts conducting an opera that lasts for five centuries
It's five centuries of McDonald's hamburgers all singing to us
So a thousand clones of Donald Trump climb out of Richard Wagner's butthole
And the 1,000 clones of Donald Trump are dancing in outer space
As they revolve and revolve around one of Wagner's operas
As God gives a speech filled with huge pubic hairs
And Marilyn Monroe with the huge penis
Begins to have anal sex with the Kennedy Brothers
As the Kennedy Brothers sing the Richard Wagner opera together
While all the characters in The Wagner opera begin flying out of the humongous toilets
That are growing in all of the installation art exhibits at McDonald's
Where Ronald McDonald the Clown is playing chess with a huge hamburger with the 5,000 heads of Kubla Khan growing out of it
And then the McDonald's restaurant flies off to the Louvre museum in Paris
Where the Mona Lisa is pleasuring herself with a vibrator
As Michael Jackson sings & dances through the hallways of the Louvre
And all of the children of the world lovingly follow Michael Jackson
Into one of the humongous toilets that are growing out of all of the installation art exhibits at McDonald's
And all of the children joyfully sing of the day when the nuclear bombs shall fall upon the world
As God kisses the human race with extinction...

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

Once again using surrealistic literature to create stand-up comedy. From my YouTube comedy channel:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bUvjA9VUnnI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bUvjA9VUnnI

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

A Tidal Wave of Bourgeois Liberals Gentrifying Working-Class Neighborhoods
A poem by Wolf Larsen

So bourgeois liberals living in penthouses
Say that working-class whites making minimum wage are privileged!
But wasn't a black man lynched everyday back when the Democrats ran the South?
But never mind all that liberal hypocrisy!
What about hordes of Neolithic peoples all charging out of this poem
And ejaculating prehistoric art all over American cities?
And then the giant Neolithic peoples all conquer the sky with their huge erections!
While the bourgeois liberals whine about animal rights when workers can't even afford their rent!
(Thanks to bourgeois liberal gentrification!)
But never mind all that liberal hypocrisy!
What about all these skyscrapers crawling out of our penises?
That's right! And clouds floating out of this poem and into the sky!
And what about the floors & ceiling of your studio apartment moving side-to-side
With the earthquakes crashing out of the saxophone!
Meanwhile, the bourgeois liberals talk endlessly about Donald Trump, perhaps to avoid talking about the fact that the minimum wage is peanuts!
But never mind all that liberal hypocrisy!
Let's talk about the Ottoman Empire swirling around you while you're walking down the street on some other planet!
And the dogs flying in the air are barking & barking & barking!
They're barking at all the giant talking testicles invading us from outer space!
But what does that have to do with bourgeois feminists being oppressed by working-class white men? The same bourgeois feminists that NEVER talk about free quality child care for working-class women! Maybe working class women should get something back for their taxes besides endless war?
But instead, let's talk about transvestite Chicago policeman in French lingerie dancing with all the dancing buildings
- While volcanoes explode working class rage all over the bourgeois liberals & conservatives alike!
But poetry prefers to pick God's nose...
And God’s boogers are huge boulders that the Neolithic people sculpt into giant words that say ten thousand things!
10,000 songs sung by the human race generation after generation!
And each song is filled with the insane greatness of creativity!
Each day a different climbing up Mount Everest of working class struggle for survival!
But hopefully we workers shall be all!
Before some capitalist monster in the White House pushes the atomic button...

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

The Priest of Immaculate Conception Blessing the Wife-Swapping Parties
A poem by Wolf Larsen

I write poetry because my head is growing everywhere!
Entire forests where millions of my heads are growing out of the ground
That's where you're walking right now!
You're walking through a surrealistic symphony whre millions of Igor Stravinsky clones are ****ing millions of Richard Vagner clones up the butt!
And that's why I play the flute with human meat & BBQ sauce!
Because all the homeless Greek gods that sleep in the subway stations love me!
I am the Wolf Larsen of Mars!
And I fight the Wolf Larsen of the planet Earth!
Who fights the Wolf Larsen that lives in the anus of Caligula!
Because the anus of Caligula is the palace of the Whiskey God!
Where the birds sing and play the violin under all the moons you can kiss!
Where the Eternal God Satan ejaculates love & peace upon us all!
Especially when we make love to earthquakes!
And we masturbate with tornadoes!
And we eat the tasty vaginas floating in the rainbows!
Until the female orgasms of the Virgin Mary
Bathe the human race in the vaginal juices of lovely doom...
And that's why I take my clothes off in front of the Queen of England -
As she knights me with her sagging tits
As the Chicago hot dogs fly in the air around us
And all the happy skyscrapers grow out of the flying hot dogs
And all of the happy skyscrapers sing extraterrestrial orgies at us
But those were happier times when the Devil & god performed oral sex operas upon each other!
And now Wolf Larsen & the human race shall perform a grand opera of cum juices and foot fetishes and cross-dressing together!

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

More from The Wolf Larsen Poetry Channel:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vf1QyUtZos0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vf1QyUtZos0

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

Sitting in a Movie Theater with the 45 American Presidents Watching World War 3
A poem by Wolf Larsen

Rabies!
Your testicles! They're magical!
Even the fields of marijuana growing out of our buttocks understand gravity!
You Bing-bonging? Then how about some Saturday night?
It's 2 strawberry! The kind that jingles!
A jingling-badoodling music in our balls!
So we throw our ballsacks through the air at each other -
And then we ride vagina spaceships until we land on Andy Warhol's face!
Because this is tomorrow!
Because this is our favorite venereal disease giving political speeches!
It's the State-of-a-Union-Flying-Diarrhea-Address bipartisan pair-of-buttocks called Washington DC!
But what does that have to do with the reader getting lost inside the Poet's head?
There we are wiping the bipartisan political speeches off of ourselves with Charmin Ultra Soft! And riding the giant ladybugs are butt-naked New York City artists!
Bed bugs! The Bay of Pigs! And that's why I have a big pair of John F Kennedy's buttocks painted on my walls - because of daylight savings time!
You're awake laying on the table and you're being eaten by a dozen space aliens all with the face of Liberace and the space aliens with the face of Liberace are playing the music of John F Kennedy's buttocks - (they're reading the musical notes from the John-F-Kennedy's-buttocks-mural on your wall)
So you hide inside of brains of one of the space aliens with the face of Liberace but then the Amazon rainforest begins growing upside down from your ceiling and now you're orbiting around Marilyn Monroe's decapitated head in a giant refrigerator located inside of one of Salvador Dali's paintings, but since Salvador Dali is dead the plane will take off immediately, to 1000 years ago back when the sheep in Montana would give the best blow-jobs to everybody in the United States Congress, and now I have to go pee all over the Chicago Police Department

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

The Great Artist John Wayne Gacy Receiving the Nobel Prize for Nose-picking
A poem by Wolf Larsen

A beautiful sunny day and a stormy winter day are dancing down the street together
When suddenly a sexual apocalypse happens!
And the vibes are playing all the screaming humans being eaten by their dogs & cats!
And the sensual harp is covering all the planets in peanut butter!
And all of the planets taste like country music!
While all the gondolas of Venice are floating up into a giant painting
Being created by the world-renowned artist John Wayne Gacy with a castrated penis-paintbrush
He borrowed from one of his favorite corpses...
Meanwhile the snow is falling upon Genghis Khan as he walks down the beach in Rio de Janeiro...
Because this is how you dance to hardware store commercials!
As huge feet from a surrealistic monster kick the planet Earth back-&-forth in a football game
being played by the annual convention of John Wayne Gacy fans in outer space
(It's the intergalactic football-soccer team of cannibalistic love dolls!)
But, what about the 6 packs of Corona screaming about the dirty dishes in your huge belly button?
After all, we're on the planet Pluto! It's 3 o clock!
It's time to masturbate dandelions into a beautiful sunny day!
And as the American Empire collapses we can all smile big earthquakes at each other
While we pick our noses to find World Peace
On this huge blue & green floating testicle we call home
hanging from some giant space alien’s hairy crotch...

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

You Can't Eat a Russian! But You Can Eat a Bourgeoisie! Yummy Yummy!
A poem by Wolf Larsen

Syphilis! Political speeches! Diarrhea!
I rearrange all the planets into one of my gonorrhea paintings!
Saxophone! Toilet paper! Herpes!
All the herpes sores fly all over the music!
And all the people fly out of the toilets and sing the blue sky to each other!
Screaming fish! Cannibalistic toddlers! Crazy children's drawings!
It's the Democratic-primary-debates about genital warts!
So the children attach little red balloons to the nuclear submarines and the nuclear submarines float up into the sky…
And the sailors jump out of the nuclear submarines and become Canadian geese migrating from the First Lady’s Vagina into the 1968 Democratic Convention...
Meanwhile, we teepee all the planets of the universe with endless rolls of toilet paper!
While we laugh like iambic pentameter on crack!
And then together all 6 billions of people on Earth begin fingering the big vagina in the sky!
And the big vagina in the sky has a big female orgasm of Jackson Pollock paintings splashing all over the planet!
As the politicians all dance in the female orgasm falling from the sky!
And all of the capitalist politicians scream giant dysentery from the big toilets in all their faces!
While the empty refrigerators in working-class homes screeaam for bringing back the guillotine!

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

Jacking Off in a Public Toilet and Leaving My Sperm There for the Next Person to See
a poem by Wolf Larsen

Suddenly giant windmills jump out of our crotches!
And solar panels attached to our heads
Begin providing energy for tidal waves of thoughts!
That Splash into the eternity
Of all the blue surrounding us
And then our nuclear-powered ballsacks
Begin powering nuclear-powered super sperm
That explode all over the faces of the space aliens
Who are building a gigantic infrastructure of gothic orgasms all around us
As all of the Pablo Picasso monsters from the Neolithic era
Begin attacking the air with huge Cubist speeches
That recreate all of our faces into radio waves
Which then jump from human brain to space alien brain
Until a giant orgy of humans & space aliens
Dances across a universe of neoclassical architecture -
A neoclassical architecture of space alien penises ejaculating solar systems
Into a Shakespearean play being performed by all the rodents of the New York City subway system
Back when the subway system connected Marilyn Monroe's nipples to the Constitutional Convention of 1787
Which was held in the Harlem McDonald's on 125th Street
Where everyone from the Mayflower smokes hashish
As the naked Wolf Larsen clones dancing on the moon
Compose the 5th Symphony of Marie Antoinette's Buttocks
Under the cannibalistic Moon of Mars
But now I have to go have bipartisan sex with the Washington Monument - goodbye!

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

And yet again turning surrealistic literature into stand-up comedy:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WHbbmQNjAkM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WHbbmQNjAkM

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

The Next American Revolution
A poem by Wolf Larsen

Ludwig Beethoven begins ejaculating his symphonies everywhere!
And all of the characters of the old Star Trek are jumping out of God's ears!
And a homeless Son of God on the subway train is screaming
That he will save us from all of our sins!
And as the naKed-mOderN-danCers-daNce all over heaven
And as all the saxophones in hell play the orgies of saints & sinners
The cannibals from outer space begin beating their hands on mountains of human skulls
to create the rhYthmS of faSt-fOod-biPartiSan-pOliTics
In the capitalist dis-United States of America
Where one out of every six children are hungry!
Are the children supposed to eat armaments?
And luxury 1,000 story penises with rent starting at mucha mulla a month
Turn formerly Working Class people into hordes of homeless wretches
But instead let’s ask how many hundreds of naked Virgin Marys can dance on a penis head?
And the winds are screaming of the coming revolution!
Will earthquakes come and topple everything?
The earthquakes of discontent -
The volcanoes of Rage -
The floods of a united humanity charging out of the trailer parks & ghettos & barrios
All marching together as a united one!
Marching from Paris to Versailles in 1789 -
Marching from the cities to Washington DC -
Marching across history -
With guns in our hands

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

A Beautiful Sunny Day is Coming!
A poem by Wolf Larsen

I build my poems with mountains of human feces!
I grab the world in my hands and I create a new everything!
I mold human **** into great giant statues!
And the giant statues of human **** get up and dance!
They dance to all the abstract expressionism flowing out of my penis and into the toilet!
And the human race falls to its knees and worships the abstract expressionism flowing out of my penis!
Because I am a schizophrenic god!
There is no god in the sky!
Wolf Larsen the Poet is god!
Wolf Larsen is the god of all of the naked people riding the subway train from 1066 to 1789!
Because 1789 and 1871 and 1917 are the great years!
That serve as an example of human liberation!
Because the great day is coming when the working class shall be free and break from its chains!
And send the bourgeoisie & their henchmen to The Guillotines!
Because The Guillotines going up-&-down will be the greatest symphony!
Because The Guillotines going up-&-down over the necks of our masters is the song of freedom!
We will write the first chapter of our freedom in the blood flowing from The Guillotines!
As the Guillotine blade goes up-&-down the voices of working-class people across the world will sing in one great chorus of Joy together!
Only the Guillotine will free us!

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

Another poem-video from my poetry channel:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jFdk8Rv8KeM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jFdk8Rv8KeM

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

cUcumbeR-peniS-saLad-with-teNnis-ballS-4-orgY-suPper !
A po!em by Wolf Larsen

I’m sleeping inside of God's ballsack...
And then I charge out of God's ballsack!
And I spurt acrooooooss the universe!
Into the gigantica obscenity
Of this poem that creates new streets
Where giant bugs devour the sky
As the music penetrates all the holes in our bodies
With the beautiful Ecstasy of Sexual tornadoes
As the fields of belly buttons grow
And grow past the neon symphonies
Which dance amongst the Glorious hemorrhoid advertisements
That crash into the planet Earth from the outer space in our dreams
As a bunch of Australias fall all over the planet Earth
And the happy testicle that is the planet Earth
Is the happy Neon now spoken by all the giant anuses in outer space!
Because outer space is our peanut butter!
Because the bugs flying around us are our ancestors!
Our ancestors of jazz music pouring happy belly buttons everywhere!
Happy belly buttons as happy as happy Pork pigs dancing everywhere happy happy to be eaten!
Because even our hemorrhoids is magical!
Because I give you all my spermatozoa with an Oscar!
And a red carpet to genital herpes!
Because all of our genital herpes together is one great big George Washington!
Because even our anuses can tell the difference between winter & summer!
Even the athlete's foot of all these political speeches in the Senate
Will save us from bad breath with jiZz-You-Can-Believe-in-Mouthwash!
Celebrate Make-America-jiZz-Again chocolate on our flagpoles!
Because everyone's jizz is freedom!

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

The Reader's Death in E Minor
A Concerto-Poem by Wolf Larsen

I crawl up a wall of billions of eyeballs
And each of the billions of eyeballs sees a different planet
Where a different symphony orchestra plays thousands of astronauts
Floating in a painting that's floating out of God's anus
As God sits on the toilet in heaven
As the colorful butterflies fly all around God
And then the astronauts ride the elephants into your mind
And now all of the millions of walls in your mind each have a different painting on them
And the sPace-alieN-mUsiCianS walk through all of the thousands of hallways in your mind
Each one plaYing sOme biZarre iNstruMenT unknown to man
And each one of the hundreds of different songs playing in your mind right now
Is different from the other - and different from anything you've ever heard before -
And that's why all the stars in the sky love you
That's why a violin player somewhere in this world is right now creating
A giant peanut-butter-&-jelly universe just for you
Because I love you with all of my genital herpes
And all of the giraffes in your studio apartment are laughing right now
They're laughing with all of the flying toads singing of World War 3
Because World War 3 is a waiting room where a mushroom cloud will sit next to you
And recite this poem to you
As you wait for the floor to become the ceiling
And for the ceiling to become an entrance way into God's anus in heaven
As all of God's angels sing their STDs to you
And all of the syphilitic classical musicians standing on the clouds
Are playing your death

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

I hate the rich. I'm obscene. But give me The Nobel Prize for Literature anyway!

Do not read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious. You have been warned!

A Musical Word Canvas of ****, Piss, & Joy
a poem-painting-symphony by Wolf Larsen

The reader blasts out of his chair and into the poem!
The reader flies through millions of minds!
The reader paints himself into the Italian Renaissance!
And then the reader pulls out his dick and pees all over space ships throughout the universe!
And now the reader is eating millions of sentences flying out of the page!
The reader jumps on top of Mount Everest and builds the universe with his bare hands!
The reader runs across all the deserts on all of the planets!
Until the reader is swallowed by one of Salvador Dali's paintings!
And now the reader is outside the 1968 Democratic Convention getting beaten up by a wave of Chicago policeman with swinging billy clubs!
And now the Chicago Symphony Orchestra begins playing the swinging billy clubs of the 1968 Democratic Convention!
And then the Orchestra begins playing Democratic Party bombs falling all over the Vietnamese people!
And then the reader falls off of Mount Everest and into the symphony!
Being played by a thousand pairs of buttocks with arms & legs!
And then Salvador Dali pulls out his penis and begins ejaculating his imagery all over the planet Earth!
And cannibalistic kangaroos are eating all of the Salvador Dali imagery and ****ting all the Salvador Dali imagery into your mind!
And suddenly your mind becomes millions of endless universes all bashing & bashing into each other!
And the Chicago Symphony Orchestra plays all of the millions of endless universes bashing & bashing into each other!
And the Orchestra is inside of your head for the next 100 years playing an endless bashing & bashing symphony!
It's the Symphony of happy-flying-vibrators!
It's the Symphony of heroin candy canes growing everywhere!
It's the Symphony of poems growing out of each other throughout the universe!
And the poems growing out of each other throughout the universe eat all of the readers both space alien & human!
And then the poems **** all the space aliens & humans into the mind of Salvador Dali who then ejaculates all of the space aliens & humans back into this poem!
And as the reader licks & licks this poem with his magical tongue
The reader begins to hallucinate thousands of clones of himself eating himself
And this self-cannibalism is the most delicious thing the reader has ever tasted
And then the reader finds himself walking for days across the desert
And the last thing the reader sees is a beautiful homoerotic Jesus Christ
Pulling him up into the big orgy in the sky

Copyright 2020 by Wolf Larsen

Another video-poem from the Great Wolf Larsen - or should I say Wolf Larsen the Great!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gzCVZ_mBO5A
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gzCVZ_mBO5A