Because they refuse to take their medication.
What is my dog thinking?
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Because they refuse to take their medication.
What is my dog thinking?
The fragrance of flowers spreads only in the direction of the wind
Why are dogs noses always wet?
Because they can't hold glasses on account of their paws and have to go nose first to get a damn drink! - So wrong!
Did I leave the iron on?
That question will answer itself shortly.
Should I buy a flamethrower, since melting snow with it would be easier than shoveling?
i would suggest instead some lavender infused sea salt, much less expensive and will leave a divine fragrance while melting the snow.
what is the right age for teaching my dog about sex?
Right before he is neutered
How do i explain to my dog about his over eating and slow metabolism?
Maybe he's an emotional eater. Food can take the focus off of anger, resentment, fear, anxiety, and a host of other emotions we’d sometimes rather not feel. I would suggest an appointment with a therapist to find out what emotions he's dealing with. Perhaps after the therapy, a bit of chi balancing and a colonic he will be on the right track.
While we are on the subject; why do people look like food to me?
You are likely a closet Cannibal, which is healthy as long as you do not begin to actually eat people - now there is where you may or may not have problems with the Law and some pi@@ed off relatives and friends.
Who steals my pens and newspaper everyday?
Ok you got me, guilty as charged.I'm also the one stealing just one of your socks from the dryer.
How did it get to be so late?
Winter days are shorter.
Why do people really SLAM doors?
this is due to the behaviour of air around the door as it is closed.
I made Jesus-shaped pancakes, but I burnt them. Am I going to hell?
I believe you have to slaughter a mosquito in order to gain entrance to the Kingdom! ("OH Lordy, help this demon child woman"!!)- raising trembling hands and eyes skyward)
Am i putting too much olive oil on this salad - this cant' be good?
if you feel you've put too much olive oil in your salad rub some on dry and rough areas like your knees and elbow as it's an excellent moisturising agent. And let's not forget not your locks, olive oil works wonders for the hair, it helps fight dandruff, repairs spilt ends and adds shine to your hair. Olive oil makes a great wood furniture polish and if your shoes are looking a bit scuffed it helps bring back their shine, restore suppleness, and protect the leather.
How come my dog doesn't understand math very well?
...and I always like to take the olive oil excess to fill my car up - Voila! Clean Energy!!
Not sure why dogs don't get math.
How come humans can't catch flying frisbees in their mouth very well?
who says humans can't do that? My ex boyfirend from the Mursi tribe in Ethiopia was an excellent frisbee catcher.
does morning sex make you a morning person?