Litnet's version of Devil's dictionary

Help: A word you yell repeatedly when you are in trouble, hoping someone will come to your aid. In America it is probably better to yell "Call 911!"

Welcome back Pompey! :)

EDIT: Oops forgot to post a word -

Senility

Hi Mona! Nice to see you my friend. :)

Senility: A word for helpless dithering; derived from the same Latin word as "senator."

Sushi

Sushi: A polite term for "The fish is SUPPOSED to be raw, you idiot!"

Wasabi:

Wasabi: A perennially dreaded question, right up there with "Where do babies come from?", the best approach is generally the direct one: "A bi is someone whose heart is so big she loves both girls and boys. Now go play."

knave:

Knave: The part of a cathedral next to the as s.

Bronco

Bronco: What so many women have called me it's embarrassing.

Next to the 'as s,' Pompey? I am without clue. Also, I get no love for the wasabi gibe? I'd have thought some applause, at least. With the one hand you've got available.

Stud muffin:

Comic genius speaks for itself, TC. :)

And the site doesn't let you say ***--hence as s.

Stud muffin: the fate of pastries that start to lose races.

As s backwards:

As s backwards: Also known as arse backwards, tush backwards, and in Uzbekistan apparently butt backwards. The term refers to all planning done by civil agencies, offices and administrations.

clusterf**k:

Clusterf**k: the perfect complement to one's clustersp**n.

Teleological

Teleological: A way of describing the iconic star of a 1970s police drama about a bald, lollipop sucking detective.

scamp:

scamp: A combination of the words "escape" and "camp" You will always need to pitch your tent or park your RV in such a way as to escape the hordes of insects, various snakes and creepy-crawlers, other campers with limited sense and even more limited bladders, and the occasional Bigfoot

Sasquatch:

Scamp: a place parents send children in scummer.

Sasquatch: As I may have said before, a preternatural being who wanders the American woodland in a gorilla suit.

Butter squash:

Butter squash: What happens to butter when Sasquatch steps on it.

Chicken suit:

Chicken suit: dragging some pecker to court. Hey, how else are you going to re-coop your egg-spences?

Igneous

Igneous: Hot

RV: