Litnet's version of Devil's dictionary

Chastity: Something for the promise of which men pay a fortune, only to discover too late the little wench's nickname is The Socket.

Fallen:

Fallen: The state that comes after being too upright and respectable.

Upright:

Upright:When you prop the stem of a plant up. With humans it´s usually an transitory position.

Illusion:

Chastity: a 'tity that doesn't get out much.

Illusion: what happens when a Buddhist hits his thumb with a hammer.

Compunction

Compunction: A sense of guilt commensurate with the realization that one has been caught.

Caught:

Caught: Any fish that suddenly becomes aware it isn't so much swimming as hanging vertically, as though suspended by a mysterious force.

And I like your definition of chastity, PB. I've got my eye on you.

Busted:

Busted: Vulgar slang for a despicable fellow or an illegitimate child.

Flustered:

Just two comments on "Chastity" (IMO definition a bit outdated even for a secular Devil´s Dictionary).
1-"Chastity" doesn´t refer only to the female part of humanity, though a lot of elements of the male part prefer to think it does.
2- According to Wilhelm Reich,https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_In...y_Sex_Morality female chastity was a sexist invention so that the husbands could be sure that they were in fact the father of their wives children. He must be right, for with the advent of the paternity tests no one cares any more about it.:hurray::hurray:

flustered: more or less like this :flare:

sexual revolution:

Sexual Revolution: The product of a non-existent substance called orgone.

Ectoplasm

Ectoplasm: What my ghost friends are made out of.

Orgone:

Orgone: See Santa Claus.

Libido

Libido: The orgone powering both the sexual revolution and chastity as well as other pseudoscientific experiences.

Pseudoscientific:

Libido: the forgotten Marx brother

Pseudoscientific: the fringe of quackery

Fringe

Fringe: that portion of the population which used to be understood to be radical, unbalanced and most comfortable when heavily drugged and straitjacketed, and which now runs society. (Ooh, ooh, he gets political...What will he do next...)

Lunatic:

Lunatic: A fringe of society whose members think everyone else is nuts.

Quackery: