toupee: a garden variety mix of fur and faux pa at a party
leather:
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toupee: a garden variety mix of fur and faux pa at a party
leather:
Leather - to beat up, as in "He gave him a good leathering"
and to beat oneself up with drink as in "He was well leathered"
Gristle
Gristle Tough parts in meat which one may unerringly find in stuff cooked by someone else, and manifestly absent in one's own cooking
Chef
Chef : A Chief without ego.
Beguiling
A method of attaching ropes to cheap tents.
Flaccid
Flaccid: perjoratively limp. Although spinach can be acceptably 'wilted' and it's perfectly neutral for a jaw or a rope to be 'slack' and everyone approves of a 'relaxed' joint of beef and most of us would feel sympathy for a 'debilitated' companion, there's absolutely no way of using 'flaccid' that doesn't carry overtones of contempt or ridicule. It's an attitudinally unambiguous adjective.
geranium
An old German
plastic
plastic: a manmade material that will outlast Man. I'm not talking here about just this civilisation, or even this epoch - but humanity itself. Plastic artefacts will survive until the marmosets have evolved and built cities and invented archaeology, at which point they will discover the Barbie doll my daughter lost in our compost heap last week, and they'll base their entire view of our species on the fact that we all must have walked very strangely with feet that small and tits that big.
the Arctic
the Arctic The great white north which always gets blamed for winter weather, when it's there in the summer also and not much warmer
Tropics
Those places where the temperature is so high everybody complains, then heat their houses to the same level in the winter, when it is "Lovely and Warm".
Stratosphere
Stratosphere Brand name for a line of crystal balls used by fortune tellers to make their fortune
Prophet
Prophet - bloke who foretells a future that he won't be around to be asked about.
jazz
A form of music that is spoken about by the pretentious, listened to by the enthusiast and played by the creative genius.
prestidigitation
Prestidigitation: Tricky dexterity
Insurance
Insurance The fine art of stacking the deck in your favor
Alibi