Is this gonna be on the test?
“Training is everything,” Mark Twain wrote; “A cauliflower is nothing but a cabbage with a college education.” Hence, the topic for this week – education of various species. From our proverbial ivory towers we might proclaim that there is no greater lesson than learning how to treat others with respect – though one wouldn't know it these days, with our public schools run exactly like medium security prisons. As a case of point, yesterday's opening panel of the posthumously published “Classic Peanuts” comic strip by the great Schulz. While being dragged to the school bus stop by his sister Lucy, Linus says, “Put in a good word for me. . .Tell the guards I came peacefully. . .”
So before I get rapped on the knuckles with a ruler or have to do time in detention, let’s get out our pencils for this week’s lesson plan:
Is This Stuff Gonna Be on the Quiz?
1. How many of the fabled “three r’s” actually begin with that letter?
2. John Hughes was an American screenwriter/director/producer who passed away just last month. His work was praised for his sensitive depictions of adolescents, especially for the film which centers around a small group of high school students forced to spend a Saturday morning confined to detention. What is the name of this well-received movie of 1985?
3. A much earlier Hughes -- Thomas – created a novel in which the title character attends a British boarding school, where he is tormented by a vexatious bully named Flashman. Name this 1857 novel.
4. The works of this American poet (1902-1967) appear on a typical high school English syllabus not only for their multi-layered quality but also for their resonance with contemporary American teenagers. The speaker in “Theme for English B,” for instance, attempts to find common ground with his instructor though both come from different cultures. Name this poet, the leading light of the Harlem Renaissance.
5. Who was the Greek philosopher (ca. 427-ca. 348 B.C.) who ran the Academy outside Athens?
6. Name the beloved comedy written by Sheridan in 1777 which contains several elements of farce, including romantic dalliances, hidden identities (especially behind screens), gossiping busybodies, and vivid characters drawn as broadly as their names: Lady Sneerville, Lady Teazle, and members of a family named Surface.
7. What is the title of Flaubert’s 1869 novel in which the protagonists may be viewed as the male counterpart of Madame Bovary, in the sense that he bases his behavior on his illusions of a romantic hero?
8. An American sportswriter first coined the term for these elite institutions, but varsity football isn't the first thing that comes to mind whenever any of these hallowed halls of learning are mentioned. (Perhaps Stanley Woodward was being ironic, since ivy was once thought to prevent drunkenness.) In any event, what are the names of the colleges in the Ivy League?
9. Who was the lean, lanky, and highly suggestible schoolmaster in The Legend of Sleepy Hollow by Washington Irving?
10. The second word of the title of this 1621 prose work by Robert Burton sounds like the first academic course a pre-med student would take. The book itself is set up like a medical treatise, but its use of cultural examples to illustrate the various kinds of mental states established the book as a significant literary work more than a scientific one. What is the complete title? (Don't feel sad or depressed, if you don't get it right.)
11. This American writer, cultural historian, and philosopher (1838-1918) is best known for his autobiographical work, whose purpose was to show how his education “didn't prepare him for the conflicts of the modern world.” He pursued a “lifelong quest to find order and unity” in a world “in the process of disintegration.” (Hmm. Where have we heard that line before?) The author’s name is incorporated within the title of this work, which is what?
12. Name the British playwright who said: “He who can, does. He who cannot, teaches.” (Incidentally , urban legend has it that during the era of graffiti, somebody once scrawled, “He who cannot teach teaches gym.”)
13. And finally, who was the title character in the 1959 hit in which the Coasters sing: “He walks in the classroom, cool and slow/Who called the English teacher ‘Daddy-Oh’?” (You may find a hint to the answer in the intro way up at the top of the quiz.)
All right – Pencils Down!
Answers
1. Only one– “reading”
2. The Breakfast Club
3. Tom Brown’s School Days
4. Langston Hughes
5. Plato
6. The School for Scandal
7. A Sentimental Education (L’education sentimentale)
8. Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Columbia, University of Pennsylvania, Brown, Dartmouth and Cornell. (Score yourself a point for each.)
9. Ichabod Crane
10. The Anatomy of Melancholy
11. The Education of Henry Adams
12. George Bernard Shaw
13. “Charlie Brown”
Sources: Reader’s Encyclopedia, Oxford Companion to English Literature, National Geographic Online edition (for #8), and YouTube.com (#13.)