No, he raised piranha, and was used to liver in his pool
Why do people lie when the truth would be perfectly acceptable?
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No, he raised piranha, and was used to liver in his pool
Why do people lie when the truth would be perfectly acceptable?
Because if they told the truth their credibility would suffer, in that if what you tell someone is a pack of lies, you are the only person that knows it, thus making you Top Banana. See "politics"
Why do manufacturers keep trying to make stuff that looks and tastes like butter, when we've got a butter mountain?
because although we have a butter mountain , its fast running out , so buy some now from baldies r us, it tastes like butter but has more cholesterol. Eating cholesterol is cool. ( breaks to clip of naomi campbell sucking lard from a biscuit on a really nice beach)
Cholesterol eating is the new extreme sport. If you dont suck on our lard you are Billy nomates. Buy one get the nest double price. High prices are cool.
why does it always rain after a dry spell ?
To stop the lakes from running away. They always stay put in the rain, because they can't afford umbrellas big enough.
Why do we now have to call the Fat Controller Sir Topham Hatt?
Because he is now sponsored by Weight-Watchers ;)
Was that Fat Controller's real name ever used (until recently)?
A search of the archives reveals nothing... highly suspicious!
Why do they call mystery stories "whodunits"?
Coz the very erly wuns wozn't spellt good, an they dint no no gramur.
Why do maps show you where a place of interest is, but not tell you WHAT it is!?
Mystery is the spice of life
Why do people, especially males, always claim they are not lost and refuse to ask for directions?
Because they only want to lose one thing, i.e. their way, without losing face as well.
Why, when men consult road-maps, do they always turn the car radio off?
Yeah, My friend turned it off once...
Why are we playing this?
Studidity, Insanity, Lack of anything better to do, and it's Fun!
Why do we refer to steam-rollers, when they are no longer powered by steam?
Old habits die hard.
Why do we cook food?
Because uncooked cows aren't as tasty, and uncooked lamb tends to still have wool attached to it. Served with uncooked potatoes and leeks, it is a delicacy amongst wolves and foxes, but not up to much, although probably still better than McDonalds
Why haven't McDonalds cottoned on that the first syllable of all their products is Muck?
Good PR reps
Why do people wash their cars right before it rains?
It is always "just before it rains" where I live. Either it's just before, just after, or it's raining. We saw the sun once, but many thought it was a hallucination - that was in 1937.
Why is it Scotch Whisky but Irish Whiskey?