Well, hardly, but thanks. :)
There are a few stars, Cassiopeia:
A lady, I think, in a chee-ah.*
Or perhaps she's a swan
Who has sat there too long.
I could never quite tell. Well then, see ya!
* Massachusetts for chair
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Well, hardly, but thanks. :)
There are a few stars, Cassiopeia:
A lady, I think, in a chee-ah.*
Or perhaps she's a swan
Who has sat there too long.
I could never quite tell. Well then, see ya!
* Massachusetts for chair
I didn't know chee-ah is Massachusetts for chair.
Out at sea was a young Hawaiian
Desperately lost but still a-tryin’
He’d left yesterday
In currents westerly
Then fixed east by spotting Orion
Oh yes, that's just the way we talk ovah hee-ah.Quote:
Originally Posted by Dreamwoven
Sancho! I was just hoping you would find us again! :)Quote:
Originally Posted by Sancho
There once was a fellow named Sancho:
A LitNetter limerick head honcho.
He'd written the rhymes
Since atiguhya's times.
I'm not fit to hold the man's poncho.
Oh Ho!!!Quote:
Originally Posted by Pompey Bum
Poetic License indeed! Hmmm ... think I'll have me some o'that! ;)
There once was a young cook named Betty
who thought she'd make sauce with spaghetti
the pasta got hot
and stuck to the pot
so Betty's spaghetti we'll forgetee
^BAH-hahahah. That’s why I like this threadie.
Thank ya’. Thankya’verymuch.Quote:
Originally Posted by Pompey Bum
Pompey Bum and El Sancho are back
Sidling up in a long black Cadillac
Limericks are fun
Ask anyone
But can be habit forming, like crack
:lol: Excellent, kiz. There's no reason to fight language when it really just wants you to play with it.Quote:
Originally Posted by kiz_paws
There was a young zombie named Teddy
Whose red-headed brother was Freddie.
Dead Teddy made ready
To mock Bette's spaghetti
Till red Fred said "Ted, don't be petty!"
Amen to that! :nod:Quote:
Originally Posted by Pompey Bum
I loved your ending line Till red Fred said "Ted, don't be petty!" ... it rolls off the tongue!
Queen Cixi, famed lady of Beijing,
Ate turtles to keep her from aging
Or drank them in tea
(So says history)
Alive--which seems less than engaging.
She favored her eunuch to males,
Had nine-inches-long fingernails,
And little, bound feet
That could gain no retreat
Before British or Japanese sails.
My limerick is done--that's the end.
The great lady died without friend.
She hurdled withal
Down to Lord Yan's dread hall
Where the turtles were waiting. Amen.
Poor old Queen Cixi! ;)
What a story, all in the lymerick format ... very witty and I loved it! :nod:
There once was a biker named Charlie
who owned a fine vintage chromed Harley
he jumped on his hawg
flew into the fog
to the local saloon for a barley
Very nice! :) Here's my contribution:Quote:
Originally Posted by kiz_paws
Charlie's lager did not lift the mist,
Still he savored its sweet, beery bliss;
Till he dreamed that his glass
Was a fair, buxom lass
And he welcomed her moist, malty kiss.
But a barman awoke sleepin' Chuckie
And explained his behavior was yucky.
Charlie had to agree
So he went for a pee
Muttering, "Always in love I'm unlucky."
Bravo! Loved it!
We're gonna have to call you the Lymerick Lord!! :lol:
My limerick muse has issued me another one:
There once was a model named Jayne
High Fashion was the name of the game
she once was so hale
now she's scrawny and pale
sad that health takes a backseat to fame
Ah, a sad but true one. Let's give it a happy ending:Quote:
Originally Posted by kiz_paws
One night Jayne felt a pang in her tummy
And thought: "Jaynie girl, don't be a dummy!"
So she munched fish and chips
Till she grew back her hips;
Now she's happy and hardy and yummy!
Ahhhhh, good ol' Fish 'n Chips! Hopefully consumed in a traditional English pub, complete with newspaper wrapping!! *yummers*
We turn our listening audience now to the field of painters.....
There once was an artist named VanGogh
who cut off his ear, don't you know?
He fought with a friend
and met an untimely end ...
... but did he kill himself, yes or no?
Actually, I have a lot I'd like to say to Van Gogh--if only he'd lend me an ear!
Are you fond of that Pablo Picasso,
The best painter west of El Paso?
Okay, he was Spanish
(My foolishness banish),
But was he a genius or assho'e?
:lol:Quote:
Actually, I have a lot I'd like to say to Van Gogh--if only he'd lend me an ear!
I'd say his techniques on canvas were genius ... but his techniques with women? A-hole.Quote:
Are you fond of that Pablo Picasso,
The best painter west of El Paso?
Okay, he was Spanish
(My foolishness banish),
But was he a genius or assho'e?
There was a young lassie, Miss Ferris
who thought she would like to see Paris
she danced at the Rouge
without any shoes
and embarrassed her date in the terrace
"Alors!" cried Miss Ferris with glee,Quote:
Originally Posted by kiz_paws
"The City of Lights is for me!"
She received a wee peck
From that rogue, T-Lautrec,
And replied to his whispers, "Mais oui!"
Ohhhh, c'est bien!Quote:
Originally Posted by Pompey Bum
Bravo, mon ami! ;)
2017 Update:Quote:
Originally Posted by Pompey Bum
There's Nothing More Pathetic than a Man in Love
My wife's gone to visit her mom
On the island of (far-flung) Taiwan.
Now freed of my tether
I only ask whether
And how I can keep her from harm. :sad:
That is so sweet, PB!Quote:
Originally Posted by Pompey Bum
All will be well... sending you good fairydogmother vibes. ;)
Thanks, kiz. :)Quote:
Originally Posted by kiz_paws
Tomorrow's the end of the planet
When a comet or something will slam it
With cosmical gasses
And when all that passes
I'll have me a cheeseburger, damn it!
There once was a day to give thanks
Invented by Puritan Yanks.
Some say, Thanks for nothin'
Then eat up their stuffin'
And savor sweet cranberry angst.
Ha ha, excellent!Quote:
Originally Posted by Pompey Bum
^yuk yuk yuk
There was a young pilgrim named Buffet
Who went to the isle of Nantucket
Dined with Algonquian
And some of their kin
All while his horse ate from a bucket
(Not sure how Buffett rode his horse to Nantucket, but them pilgrims was clever)
It was probably a seahorse. How else would it have fit in the bucket?Quote:
Originally Posted by Sancho
A tall horse colored chestnut
Pilgrim astride riding there but,
Upon him came sneakin’
One last Mohican
Intent on giving a haircut
There was a bold Indian named Squanto,
As friendly to white men as Tonto.
He told them dead fishes
Would perk up their dishes,
Then took off for Provincetown pronto.
OMG ... I am in the midst of a Limerick show-down....
Go Sancho!
Go Pompey Bum!!
Luvin' it!
There once was a dude from L.A.
Who claimed he’s an Indian Brave
Said call me Tonto
But then his Aunt Flo
Said everyone knows him as Dave
(I love this thread. I’m not any good at it, but I do love it nonetheless.)
I've eaten too well, I confess;
My belly should not be compressed.
Oh, ask not the reason!
Should someone start squeezin'
All things would be clearly expressed.
(Just have fun and play with the language :) ).
A middle aged turkey called Sue,
Was recently listed in "Who's Who."
If you find that surprising,
Consider surmising,
It's as normal as a cow that goes "Moo."
An ECC commissioner called Delors,
Was out for a walk on the moors.
He was feeling quite fey,
Till he bumped into May,
Who had him ensconced in the Tower.
Her Majesty's Pleasure,
Was not for this fella,
His demeanour grew wilted and grey.
He misread Englands stance,
On the Brexit advance,
Now addressed by his jailer as "Flower!"
( Whoops. Does not quite gel. But "une point" for trying.)
^Ha! Close enough for government work, eh?
Yesterday the turkey was roasting
And family at the house hosting
Now we’re off to the mall
Then a little football
With the meal in the tank composting
A spider once started to covet
So he crept up to little Miss Muffet.
Her tuffet looked fine
So he slipped up behind.
Al Franken's the name of that dumbsh*t.
So the senator’s a little handsy
May have thought himself manly
But he was confused
The lady accused
And I always thought he’s a pansy
how can one type when one is laffing this hard!!Quote:
Originally Posted by Pompey Bum