The LitNeT Town crier.

the quick catch-up
http://www.chadmount.com/blog/archives/ketchup.gif
no not ketchup, catchup :rolleyes:
All the highest rated poems today were written by amuse http://www.websmileys.com/sm/fingers/fing22.gif The editor strongly suggestes people go read them!
It looks like Bong maybe back for good
The book club voting for the remebering Fowels book read is closing on the 15th if you want to read one go and vote!
At present The French Lieutenant's Woman is in the lead by three votes.
Our sources lead us to assume that the Christmas read nominating thread will be opening soon.
-- On a side note Nightshade may have another live read for a christmas story but nominating for that will be a while yet.
Nightshade would also like to apologise for never fully uploading all the live chat for the Sleepy hollow cercimastances interveened unfortunatly but it should be all up by the end of today.
and so ends the current events.

Dear sub,
We thankyou for your expressed interest also on behalf of all the smilies , the made up people everywhere and the future winner of the Member of the year for your fantastic idea!
Also we would like to say that we really really really love your funny pictures.
sincerly
all the staff at The Crier and the embassey of smilies

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by subterranean

Dear Crier,

I'm writing to express my praise for your cover on the Member of The Year event. I truly enjoy your short, yet informative and entertaining article. Keep up the good work.

Sincerely,
Sub - A loyal reader of The Crier

---

Dear sir,
It was recently brought to my attention that your comment on elven nurses

Quote:

---

(*drooooll* elven nursessss)

---

might be taken with objection by their families to such an extent that they petioneted the elvn king to close the infermitry and all the patients have been moved to the Mordor ward.
Yours PC-ly
The objector
http://www.websmileys.com/sm/mad/1106.gif

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Gollom or smeagolor was it Jakobin?

i did suggest it and i got shot down once again (bang bang)

Latest headline: Jakobin was shot down in several threads leading to multiple gun shot wounds to the chest. He is now in hospital in rivendell being taken care of by elven nurses (*drooooll* elven nursessss) and should be up and running within the next few days.

until then, smeagol will take over his posting duties (NOO! GOLLUM SHALL DO IT!!) but there is still much debate over this from several parties.

---

Dear Objector,
who exactly are you?! and what are you doing answering my mail! When I find you you are Fired!
despite that I will thank you for your input and remind you that should you contribute in the future be NICE to the reading customer who took the time to write in!
THE BOSShttp://www.websmileys.com/sm/dressed/bek004.gif

Admin
Baddad
Foolonthehill
Ihrocks
Jay (6)
Koa
Mono
Nightshde (2)
Pendragon
Rachel
Scheherazade (2)
Shea
subterranean

Editor would like to remind people that it is the 10 with the most nominations that will be voted from so if somone was nominated once dont feel shy and if you want to NOMINATE them again!!

Run to the hills hide your babies there is a monster among us and his name is BONG!

http://difference.weblog.glam.ac.uk/.../Slitheen.jpg/
For years we have all been under the illusion that Master Bong was a safe if slightly misguided individual has been proven False! he is a monster a manifestation of all the evil baddies in all the books in all the world.

Today it was exposed that Bong does not exsist that in fact he is but a akin used by the Slitheen
to infiltrate the lit network so that they CAN extermnate us!

Originally it was thought that a slith had eaten bong Which caused his dissapearnce but the truth is on him memrable incounter with the sith he did not come to harm oh no1 what happened was he unzipped himself and ate the sith!!!


As we right this we hear the pounding on the door hes coming to get us save yourselvesssssssssssss.......................................

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Nightshade

Run to the hills hide your babies there is a monster among us and his name is BONG!

http://difference.weblog.glam.ac.uk/.../Slitheen.jpg/
For years we have all been under the illusion that Master Bong was a safe if slightly misguided individual has been proven False! he is a monster a manifestation of all the evil baddies in all the books in all the world.

Today it was exposed that Bong does not exsist that in fact he is but a akin used by the Slitheen
to infiltrate the lit network so that they CAN extermnate us!

Originally it was thought that a slith had eaten bong Which caused his dissapearnce but the truth is on him memrable incounter with the sith he did not come to harm oh no1 what happened was he unzipped himself and ate the sith!!!


As we right this we hear the pounding on the door hes coming to get us save yourselvesssssssssssss.......................................

---

OMFG, he want's my victoria sandwich cake doesn't he? Doesn't he?! Look at those jowls; those are the jowls of a hungry John Prescott during PMQs!! *runs away screaming, cake in hand*

If someone wants to talk about sports, people can visit the thread "All about sports"

hehe, Lit-Net Town Carrier is doing a very fine job. Its a good news carrier.

The count is now :
Admin
Baddad
Foolonthehill
Ihrocks
Jay (7)
Kaltrina
Koa
Mono
Nightshde (5)
Pendragon(2)
Pensive
Rachel
Scheherazade (4)
Shea
subterranean

:lol: :lol: :lol:

pulls out dictaphone would you care to make that an official comment??
:D

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Nightshade

pulls out dictaphone would you care to make that an official comment??
:D

---

Yes, I would :D

Night, your namesake is famous! for today there are two :) highly rated poets; naegling's Old Torn Nightie is a most laudable work. :nod:

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Nightshade

Run to the hills hide your babies there is a monster among us and his name is BONG!


For years we have all been under the illusion that Master Bong was a safe if slightly misguided individual has been proven False! he is a monster a manifestation of all the evil baddies in all the books in all the world.

Today it was exposed that Bong does not exsist that in fact he is but a akin used by the Slitheen
to infiltrate the lit network so that they CAN extermnate us!

Originally it was thought that a slith had eaten bong Which caused his dissapearnce but the truth is on him memrable incounter with the sith he did not come to harm oh no1 what happened was he unzipped himself and ate the sith!!!


As we right this we hear the pounding on the door hes coming to get us save yourselvesssssssssssss............................ ...........

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by RococoLocket

OMFG, he want's my victoria sandwich cake doesn't he? Doesn't he?! Look at those jowls; those are the jowls of a hungry John Prescott during PMQs!! *runs away screaming, cake in hand*

---

---

Aww, come on, the poor creature is rather cute! :p

....yeah.............ok.......................I now fear the Bong.................. *ponders that for a moment*............................ok, I fear BONG, not, 'the bong'...........whew!......

now that's the story of the century...i'm still laughing :lol:

The count is now :
Admin
Baddad
Foolonthehill
Ihrocks
Jay (9)
Kaltrina
Koa
Mono
Nightshde (7)
Pendragon(2)
Pensive
Rachel
Scheherazade (5)
Shea
subterranean
Taliesen

Quote:

---

Aww, come on, the poor creature is rather cute!

---

Miss darcy you shock us you have obviously not been exposed to enough Dr who!

Thank you Amuse for your input :D

Bong we are glad you Enjoyed it but be warned we know where the heart of the tardis is hidden!


All the staff of the crier

Dear town crier:

Is there going to be an article on how to avoid the terrors of the bong? The safety of formun members could depend on this revealing.

- sincerly concerned cynic

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by simon

Dear town crier:

Is there going to be an article on how to avoid the terrors of the bong? The safety of formun members could depend on this revealing.

- sincerly concerned cynic

---

Dear CC,
we are sorry to inform you that our resident expert is dead.

you will notice the article advised heading for the hills? This is for a fundementaly important reason that the MOnsters of this world hate LIGHT and hills of the milkyway are above the clouds so there is no covering and Eternal light. You should all abandon your lands and posetions and gold and valubles and posts and head for the hills of the milky way where you will be safe.

Yours worriedly
Pank the distressed
http://www.websmileys.com/sm/sad/2.gif

I know who you are and belive me when I catch you you will be sorry!!
In fact heed this warning if you dont stop stealing MY mail off MY desk and answering it I WILL fire you!!
And some on get me some kind of ghos expeller or resistant Prof. Pes is still refusing to rest in peace.
Your
BOSS and the controller of your livley hood (in othe words im watching you Pank, objector and the rest and dont think you can hide behind those names forever!)
http://www.websmileys.com/sm/dressed/bek004.gif

Dear Town Crier,

Sorry to bother again, but I am concerned for the reliability of this town paper. If one of your staff is misbehaving then how are us readers supposed to know that what we are reading is from the truth. And should there be a problem of theft in your paper, I can recomend a few techniques for eradicating them should you wish to know. Just let me know in the most secrecy and we'll smoke 'em out!

Less Sincerly and more Friendly,
Truth Seeker

Quote:

---

Miss darcy you shock us you have obviously not been exposed to enough Dr who!

---

I obviously haven't. http://www.websmileys.com/sm/aliens/hae28.gif

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by simon

Dear Town Crier,

Sorry to bother again, but I am concerned for the reliability of this town paper. If one of your staff is misbehaving then how are us readers supposed to know that what we are reading is from the truth. And should there be a problem of theft in your paper, I can recomend a few techniques for eradicating them should you wish to know. Just let me know in the most secrecy and we'll smoke 'em out!

Less Sincerly and more Friendly,
Truth Seeker

---

Dear truth seeker,
All the staff at this establishment are shocked!
We ALWAYS tell what we promised to on the launching of this paper (see post #1). As for the theft it is more a case of too many cooks as it were:D
ALL the staff at the crier
------ This letter has been aproved by THE BOSS

Well I see there are no letters for the editor Im wondering if anyone stole them off my desk or if people have just lost confidence in us?
Anyway the highlights of the week
Mono popped back for a a few posts ( in the member of the year nomination and random thought of theday) He seems to be doing fine and may return soon-ish :D

Rachel also posted in random thought of the day Which makes me if no one else happy to have heard from her , my thoughts are with you

NO one has nominated anyone for the additional awards!

There is actuallly going to be a forum reunion by the looks of it !! :banana:

Dear editor:

when can we expect a report on the missing thread: Leaving your mark?

Concerned citizen;
silence dogood


:D

Dear silance dogood
the editor is hunting up a piece for the weekend special that unfortunatly will not be out till Sunday due to prior commitments floods fires and exploding eggplants

Yours truly the editor

Quote:

---

Miss darcy you shock us you have obviously not been exposed to enough Dr who!

---

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Miss Darcy

I obviously haven't.

---

I have an interesting true story involving Dr. Who:

In the mid-1970s a young woman named Leslie Sternberg lived with me for several months in Hawaii. She told me she was from California and her father was an "avocado rancher" there.

Fast forward five or six years after we broke up and I lost track of Leslie. I'm sitting in a hotel room, watching the telly, when Dr. Who comes on. Never heard of the program before, but my jaw practically drops to the floor when I see the female lead, Elisabeth Sladen. She looks exactly like Leslie -- and I mean exactly: face/eyes/figure/large feet and certain other body parts with which I was quite familiar.

Later, almost by accident, I discovered that Leslie had lied to me about her background. She was the daughter of a world-famous artist and she grew up in New York City.

Leslie either used Elisabeth Sladen as her British stage name or she has a doppleganger in England. I never found out which was the case.

Well its official. My employer is a bone head. He wants me to work 24 hours a day seven days a week (no joke). He also doesn't want to pay me for the 24 hours a day, because its against company policy to have people work 24/day. Can anyone say catch 22. I might just have to tell him where he can stick this job.

Dear Editor,

Is it possible to get an update regarding the member of the year nominations and the categories? It would be very much appreciated.

Sincerely,

An Inquisitive Reader

can everybody say OOPs???

:D

Weekend special

yes we are aware its late

THis weekends highlights
-- Leaving your mark, has it finally been killed off?
--- A spy among us! Is she working for the forces of evil mindnumbing aliens or for the white hats?

Some of you will weep and some will cheer The unkillable unsinakable thread is STILL going. Its death was a hoax. A cruel one which ever side you were on. Envision the sight a crowd lead by Stanislaw and Fool on the hill were weeping inconsolably at the death of their most happy thread. while behind them a definet but tasteful celebration was going on. Just as everyone had gotten ther stride :bawling: sniff sniff cheer :lol: suddenly an eerie hush decended on both groups.
ANd from over the hill was sighted a man swinging a bag and whistling in a most disgracfully unfitting manner. Whe rather savgly questioned as to who he was and didnt he know the sad occasion, he replied," No, Im sorry whats going on?" When told about the death of the thread he stood a moment and then his lips began to twitch and twitch and hestarted laughing so hard that he ended up rolled up in a ball in the middle of the road.
Seeing the crowds distraction a certain unnamed pirate stole the seeming strangers bag only to start screaming with laughter too. At this point a dective came flying into the thread and took one look at th e stranger, the pirate and the bag and started smiling finally he was able to get the crowd to examine the bag at which time they noticed the baggage lables which stated that the bag was property of "The spirt of The leaving your Mark thread, General chat, General, Literature Network Forums"
Fianlly after many hours of explaining it came to light that MArk HiJack, as the thread likes to be called, had taken a short holiday to the land of Google.
He promises to warn The rest of the comunity before his next trip.
http://www.nma.gov.au/libraries/imag...ing%201954.jpg
The cheering at the revival of the thread.

http://www.mlemarchand.com/Bronze/im...%20Liberty.jpg
Desperation at the death of the thread.

Kaltrina exposed! Spy behaviour disclosed
Our reporter has struck again! revealing another truth about the local comunity. As you may ( and should) rember last week we uncovered an alien presence. This week we discovered spies!
It appears that Kaltrina is a spy with all the secret gadgets. This means she can make you disssssapear without you even knowing it!

Quote:

---

ahhhhhhhh shes even made the rest of this writing dissapear! how awful!
Hide yourselves get theouse shealding your thoughts hats so she doesnt read your mind! we would continue our investigation but...

---

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh the reporter has dissapered ahh run for the hills what dont you have the bags packed yet?!!
Hysterical proof rederhttp://www.websmileys.com/sm/sad/2.gif

A note on the coverage of the nominations
I would just like to point out that no one has posted in the addional awards thread although some people have been nominated in the MotY thread :D

The editor

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by B-Mental

Well its official. My employer is a bone head. He wants me to work 24 hours a day seven days a week (no joke). He also doesn't want to pay me for the 24 hours a day, because its against company policy to have people work 24/day. Can anyone say catch 22. I might just have to tell him where he can stick this job.

---

You must do as your employer says. If you don't, it will influence other workers to disobey the employer and then what do we have? Anarchy! The whole economic system will suffer. Your employer will have to send his son to Penn State instead of Harvard, own only one Mercedes rather than two, buy a smaller summer home on that lake in New England. Oh, the humanity!

Seriously, though, can you spell U-N-I-O-N?

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by B-Mental

Well its official. My employer is a bone head. He wants me to work 24 hours a day seven days a week (no joke). He also doesn't want to pay me for the 24 hours a day, because its against company policy to have people work 24/day. Can anyone say catch 22. I might just have to tell him where he can stick this job.

---

Can you give me a tip on how to stay awake and sober for 24 hours a day and seven days a week?

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by subterranean

Can you give me a tip on how to stay awake and sober for 24 hours a day and seven days a week?

---

Coffee and benzidrene. But you'll start seeing leprechauns after several days with no sleep.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by subterranean

Can you give me a tip on how to stay awake and sober for 24 hours a day and seven days a week?

---

You just catnap 20-30 minutes 3-4 times a day

Well when I don't sleep I see imps, never before has a leprechan crossed my path though. Perhpas one day one shall chance upon me and supply be with a bevy of gold for the ritual sacrifice to the sleepless gods.

Careful it doesn't beat you about the knee caps with his sheleleagh.

what's the latest news???