-
We don't see "swim" as a noun very often; usually it's in gerund form --"swimming." Then again, it's perfectly logical, corresponding to "walk," as in "Let's take an old-fashioned walk."
Despite the state of my boggled mind (after attempting to read the Short Story Forum today), I still can count (I think.) I'm still puzzled about the three people in the water-- who are "you" and "she"?
The imagery is good, "unfamiliar" in a good sense. In addition to fauna and flora of Africa( I take it), we don't often see kites in a poem about swimming. Another "unfamiliar" element which works.
I also liked the cameo appearance of the plovers. I can just picture their little pointed bills and their little feet scampering along the edge of the water.
-
Hi Auntie: Yes, 'go for a swim' is common parlance over here, but a swim is also a place where fish lurk :D
As I said to Haunted, to say who 'you and she' were would be telling :D I had never seen so many kites in one place before; they flew in and gathered from god knows where. You can barely look up out there without seeing one or two flitting about, but there must have been nearly a hundred of them wheeling skywards in an enormous helix on that occasion.
JB once commented that I was a bit of a twitcher. I never really thought of myself as a bird watcher before he mentioned it, but I don't seem to be able to write about the natural world without mentioning birds. I wouldn't consider myself an expert ornithologist, though I have to admit that I like watching the tweeties. There are so many different kinds...
Anyway, thanks for gracing the poem with your attention.
Live and be well - H