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You write so very well Becca! Sorry, I just read the first two paragraphs, will read it perhaps tommorow but they are brillant! I love alliteration for some reason and I loved for instance "barran branches". Even though I do not know what Wahnipate is, I loved the scenes you created for the mind, creaking pines and all that.
AH! I realized after posting this and, as Prince pointed out, there were several errors that I would like to correct before reposting. Apologies.
I worried a bit at the beginning of this portion, as some of the writing felt rushed and I had some trouble throughout about the logistics. You appeared to have travelled a good long distance and yet your grandmother was there at the end of the road, as if she had known all along where you were headed, but once the confrontation with her began, I was thoroughly absorbed.
This:
struck me as a brilliant bit of observation, but this:Quote:
Her anger is the veiled kind where she wants you to know that she’s angry. She wants you to know she’s only pretending that she isn’t. She wants her anger clear, transparent and to manipulate you into going home, with mind games and control and power. I tune her out, to do the hardest thing of my life. Call my Mum and my Dad, and let them know where I am, and that I’m okay.
puzzled me. "We and I"?Quote:
The boat is here, and we and I board.
You know how to send me the rest of this if you care to.