Printable View
"What's Robert telling those kids, Martha?"
By the swing set, they could hear Robert's voice rise, "...and then there was a BIG BANG!"
"Oh. He's telling them his version of the creation of the universe."
When the kids settled, he leaned in toward them and whispered, "And God said, 'Oops.'"
Kathy's six-year-old Billy sat by her. She whispered, "What was that crazy Dr. Roqetscientski telling you by the swing set?"
Billy shook his head and giggled.
"You can tell me."
Billy refused.
"Whisper it in my ear."
Billy spoke into her ear, "He said God pooped out the universe."
"Robert Roqetscienski told your son that God pooped out the universe."
"No! Even Robert's not that stupid. Billy probably misunderstood."
"You need to talk to your son." Kathy told her husband.
"Hell, I don't know how it started."
Before bed, Billy's father reasoned, "It might have been only a fart."
It was Andrew, the corrupter of children that found him in the horses stall, the imprint of a horseshoe on the side of his face; I was there to see his bloody body when Andrew carried my friend Sammy into the kitchen. That is when I came to hate God.
Fifty words or less
and something to be said?
That is what poems are for.
one day a man to outdo the cactus decided to grew very tall. but he could not see the cactus.
so the cactus decided his turn to grow very high but it could not see the man.
they both decided to grow tall. they could not see each other.
they grew small they still could not see each other.
the end was they decided to go their different ways to never cross each other. they simply could not get on.
Okay, this is a poem. But I like the idea and had to give it a try!
Elbow bent and resting on the desk
Legs crossed at the ankles
Fingers flip through a book
Head on hand and the eyes are glazed
If this is work then who would want it?
But when she’s in her own world she’s the most beautiful
(45)
So love conquers all?
That is what they say
But I have love and I’m still all alone
My kitchen floor still isn’t finished
And my car’s brakes still aren’t working
So why is this love just taking his time?
Hurry up and get me out of here!
(48)
Sorry, another poem : )
Okay, tried a story. Not very good, but okay? Here it is:
Sweat beaded on his body and his face grew red. Should he start with her name? Talk about the weather or maybe this party? Clumsiness in one.. two.. three.
“Great, another guy who thinks that just because I’m hot I’m ready to mingle” she thinks, catching his eye.
(48)
Good job. I like this a lot.Quote:
Originally Posted by LaughGiraffe
Electricity was off. They took stairs, began long flight, telling stories to each other. First the wife mentioned about her busy day, it ended at 21 st storey. Still they had one more floor. Then husband narrated a short story, 'I just noticed, I have forgotten keys in car.'
[49 words]
“I never cheated on you before. I won’t tease Tom ever again.”
“Hey! It’s alright. You’re too old to get knocked up and I’m too old to chase fellas off you.”
“You sure chased off Tom fast enough.”
“I only hope the kids are mine.”
“Yeah. Me, too.”
------------------------------------------------------------------
Thoughts occurring after reading the "Feminist criticism of sex scenes" thread: http://www.online-literature.com/for...-of-sex-scenes
Today we all got together and celebrated Max's 100th birthday. As always, everyone had a nice time, and he seemed to enjoy the attention, compliments, and gifts. And, as always, the elephant in the room went unspoken: dogs really aren't supposed to live this long.
Nice one, Calidore!
Thanks very much, YesNo.
“Take me as I am, or watch me as I go.”
She said this softly, while looking into tired eyes that were restrained; yet still encapsulated a hint of compassion from earlier times.
Outside, the fog hung over Edwards Square and droplets disseminated over the silent visage outside the window.
Heart drumming, Adam prays. He flings the door open and shut. Coast is clear, noone's there. Re-open, fling door shut, and hasten down the stairs. Leave this party forthwith. Pity whoever enters next, discovering the broken toilet brimming with Adam's extension.
Sue enters.
(39 words)
HE keeps the wind in his hand
HE made appear the dry land
HE made in his image a perfect man
HE cried when man went bad
HE came himself to make things right
HE came to draw us by HIS side.
HE is God
45 words tell a story
I am glad this thread is picking up again. Now to try to think of something to say in fifty words or less.
He came, saw and got stuck in the mire.
And every one else went on as usual.
The farmhouse rests on a flat, grain-growing, dusty, wonderful world. I am three. Outside I want to meet the dog who guards the farm.
Then I am on the ground. Someone says they will shoot that dog. Another stitches my eyebrow and cheek. I did not mean to frighten him.
Behind the glass, the girl greeted the man.
“Hello, my name is Eve.”
“Hello, Eve” the man replied. “My name is Dr. Adams. I was invited to meet with you. I heard that you were a very special girl.”
“Yes, I can think, so I am,” the robot replied.
Hi, all..... New here.
50 words.
“Captain Jones, welcome aboard flight 624. We’ll cruise at 35,000. Hope we don’t have turbulence, that stuff really scares me. If lucky, we’ll be in Chicago in a couple of hours. Oh! Co-pilot informed me we’re scheduled for NY. I always get them confused. Relax, the drinks are on us.”
Nice stories, PaperPancakes and george c, and welcome! Nothing like the pilot giving the impression of incompetence. I sometimes wonder if what I do is think.
This story haunted me a bit, so I didn´t know what to say. If it is a real story I hope the dog wasn´t shot and the child grew up without dog trauma.Quote:
Originally Posted by YesNo
Good story!(But I hope you aren´t a pilot!)Quote:
Originally Posted by george c
It's a real story. I had two scars on my face as I was growing up from the incident, one over the eyebrow and one on my lower cheek. They are still there, but I accumulated more over the years and the waves of age have made them inconspicuous. I don't know what happened to the dog, but my main memory was concern for him. I still like dogs. No trauma.Quote:
Originally Posted by Danik 2016
I thougth so. Anyway your reaction was admirable. Usually kids that suffer that kind of accident get scared of dogs for the rest of their lives.Quote:
Originally Posted by YesNo
The Earth was long gone by the time they appeared. They had no knowledge of the Earth’s previous existence, or of the existence of different worlds. They felt important and unique in the timelessness of the universe. And, in their loneliness, they invented God.
Had their ups and downs, but seemed to make the relationship work.
Lately, she didn’t seem herself. Asked her about it, she had no response.
One morning she was gone. What had he done, he wondered?
Phone rang. “Hello.”
“Have your puppy. Luckily, your phone number was on her collar.”
50 words....
Regards,
George
Before this moon will rise the sun must set. I wait alone upon the beach except for strangers waiting for it, too.
And then we see its fresh, faint light. It lifts above the ocean’s noisy waves. I watch until I’m sure it’s safely high enough to journey on alone.
The cheese moon
Once the moon was a big cheese. The people living on it had food in abundance. They lived in the big caves of the moon. Soon they quarreled about the food. The angry moon changed into a dry land. And they all died of want.
In a coma, doubtful he’d regain consciousness.
Family worked in shifts to be by his side in case he awoke.
He did.
“Tell me what’s new in the country,” he said.
“Trump is president-elect and Palin considered for VA secretary,” his brother, said.
“Please, put me back in a coma!”
50 words....
Regards,
George
By 2050, after thirty years of deep global recession, the markets bottomed. All countries had declared bankruptcy. The European Union and the United States had divided into twenty-seven independent sectors.
On May 9th, the Chicago Sector suffered a nuclear strike. It surrendered. To make sure, the Coast Sector struck again.
During the bull phase people worried about black holes, dark matter, alien invasions, simulations, parallel universes, robots taking over, meteor strikes, and how to get to Mars when no one had yet gone to the Moon.
Hit by the bear, people realized all that was asinine. Now we just worry.
Danik. Nope, not a pilot, though many years ago I did take lessons and solo. No, I haven't flown in, well...35 years or so. Also, don't like heights.
Here's another story.
Squirrels, preparing for winter. Sam and Sallie dragging in insulation, Sam hauling up acorns. Occasionally, he’d come up huffing and puffing with a can of beanie-weenies.
At the base of the tree with a brown bag, Sam yelled, “Throw the rope. For you, Sallie.”
“Holy cow, watermelon vodka! My favorite.”
50 words....
Regards,
George
There's nothing like getting another species' opinion on watermelon vodka, george c. :)
-------------------------
Dr. Juan Palitis flipped a nickel. It dropped onto the table: heads or tails? He was demonstrating statistics to female nurses, re-certifying their licenses, showing them how to be rational like he was and not believe in New Age spiritualist junk.
Heads.
Tails.
Bounce. The coin landed on its edge.
YesNo, speaking of New Age....
“Your life is in shambles.”
“I know.”
“You use astrology, psychics, crystals, Feng Shui, Bach Flowers, aromatherapy, spiritual healers, angels, no telling what else.”
“What do you think I should do?”
“For once, try using a real counselor to help you?”
“Hmm.”
“Well?”
“Think I’ll get my crystals cleansed and recharged.”
50 words....
Regards,
George
Now that you mentioned it, george c, I probably need to get my crystals recharged.
-----------------------------
She moved the pendulum over a picture of a human body. It circled near the chest area. “You have a strong heart chakra. That’s exceptionally rare.”
His girlfriend later asked, “Did my psychic straighten you out like I said she would?”
“No way!” He always knew that about his heart.
Yesterday the last human editor of a literary magazine of any value was replaced by a robot.
All quality texts now come from AI authors with results beyond belief. Billions upon billions of young, avid pseudo-humans want to buy more.
The meat-bodied human population has officially lost our literary race.