Litnet's version of Devil's dictionary

Righteous: On the good side of bad. Or the bad side of good depending on whose butt is getting kicked.

Good Side:

Good Side: The side of your body where a photograph should show none of your flaws. To believe that you actually have such a side is the epitome of mental illness

Epitome:

Epitome: the cover of a tome, usually hard covers of a long and old book, e.g. of a Bible.

Metal illness:

Metal Illness: The personality disorders associated with a metal’s unstable isotopes.

Unstable:

Your definition was better than mine, YesNo. I would have just said "rust".

Unstable: To let the horses out to graze.

Catamaran

Catamaran - 1) wind aided multi-hulled water vehicle that can be very swift sometimes, e.g. with the sails not dragging in the water
2) What cats do when threatened with water or other stimuli (past-tense)

Cat

Cat: A creature whose name, like its nature, are remarkably close to rat, in that it should be skewered with a rake, then burned.

Rake:

Rake: 1) Implement of the devil created to cause human suffering by using it on the leaves every fall. 2) Male person of dubious character who seems to get lucky with a lot of women

I changed my misspelled word. That's what I get for depending on spell-check!

Mental Illness:

Mental Illness: 1) Not to be confused with metal illness (speed metal/heavy metal/head-banging/other, or rust [as intimated earlier]): Something nearly everyone has to a degree, but rarely admitted, treated, or cured. Mental illness is a two edge sword that may drive creativity or bring one to paralysis... or worst http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/...tm_source=digg . 2) One of the most lucrative revenue streams that monopolistic drug tzars depend on.

Monopoly ?

Monopoly: A tedious board game where the goal is to get all the play money and property and make everyone else broke.

Money:

Money: An necessary evil, but love of it is the root of all evil

Birthday:

Birthday: When a Hollywood bimbo pops out of a cake and sings to you and for unknown reasons calls you "Mr. President."

Cleavage:

Cleavage: A demarcation between two things that is exaggerated and clearly visible so that the things themselves can be left to the viewer’s perverted imagination.

For example the sentence, “The cleavage between metaphysical idealism and metaphysical realism produces an existential tension where both sides think the other is moronic” tells you nothing, but it does accentuate the demarcation between these two things and does its best to tease you to explore further.

Exploration:

Exploration: What you do with your hand behind the girl's back as you fecklessly search for the clasp.

Satisfaction:

Satisfaction: Apparently Mick Jagger just can't get it

Solitude: