No more entries?
There is still plently of time, but pretty soon the deadline is going to start to creep up on you.
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No more entries?
There is still plently of time, but pretty soon the deadline is going to start to creep up on you.
New York’s bravest
haunt
scattered September ashes.
Each year
the calendar
remembers
lost dreams.
tinkling glasses,
piano keys,
sultry smoke,
stools
Captain Morgan,
Sailor Jerry,
and the
crew
Here is a reminder just 5 days until deadline
A golden ray
Of sunshine
Lingers
On Faerie’s dancing
In
A never ending
Ring
Thank you to everyone how has entered with all of your wonderful entries. The deadline is now here, so I will get to work on reading all of your works carefully, and the hard task of choosing a winner.
Great Job everyone, this was really a tough one.
Pendragon: Of course I love the topic of your poem, and it is very October appropriate. You did a fine job in creating a very eerie scene, and telling a story, painting a visual image for the reader in such few words. I particularly loved the first verse. I could hear the hooves of pitch black horses ringing against cobblestone streets as the looming dark carriage rolled down the road to its fateful journey. The ending was intriguing as well, suggesting that it is not quite over yet, adding a touch of mystery.
qimissung: I thought your's was beautiful. And I loved the originality and creativity behind it. The fantasy aspect was quite unique, and the words were elegant. It was mythical, and spoke of the old romance, in the days of knights and maidens. Also loved the way in which you used two different perspectives, and points of view to create a whole picture.
AuntShecky: Beautiful poem that invoked many of the senses. You can see the colors of the field and smell the plants and the grasses in the air, feel the warmth of the sun. I loved the nature aspect of the poem, it was quite vivid and offered a very serene feeling to it and I just loved the last verse.
Drkshadow03: A very heartfelt poem of a tragedy that many people can relate to and have suffered personal losses from. I particularly enjoyed the lines scattered September ashes and remembers
lost dreams. This poem had a very nice flow to it, and I like the uniqueness of the structure in your poem.
krymsonkyng: The first verse was lovely I think. I loved the way you invoked the sounds, with the tinkling of the glasses and one can just imagine the way the piano keys sounded. Also I like the way in which the sound of the glasses and the piano could be merged together. You set up a really good atmosphere for the poem within the first verse, and I loved 'sultry smoke" and the suggestiveness that is offered. The second verse for some reason cracked me up, but I am a stickler for nautical themes, and so I quite enjoyed that.
balehead: This was quite a lovely poem, I loved the line "sunshine lingers" and I enjoyed the fantasy feeling behind it with the dancing of the fairies. This poem was quite playful and lighthearted, but rather delightful, and I enjoyed the creativeness in your structure of the poem.
After carefully reading over all of the poems, as we all know I had to choose but one winner. And so in much difficult dliberation, I have at last choosen qimissung as the winner of this form poetry contest.
Congratulations to qimissung
Congratulations qimi! :ladysman: looking forward to the next form!
Thank You, Dark Muse and Pendragon! All the entries were excellent. In fact in my opinion, mine pales somewhat in comparison. Having been faced with the difficulty of choosing just one, I appreciate DM's effort and thoughtfulness.
I will have a new form for us soon.
I've decided on a form for the next contest. It's a form of poetic argument called The Bop. It's written in three stanzas, each followed by a repeated line or refrain.
The first stanza (six lines) states the problem.
The second stanza (eight lines) explores and expands upon the problem.
If there is a resolution, the third stanza (six lines) finds it. If a resolution cannot be made, then the third stanza documents the attempt to find one.
Following is an example, my first effort at this form:
Oh, I Love
Oh I love you
I love how you came swaggering into my life
Held me, caressed me
Took me by the hand and hauled me off to see the world
But now another voice is taking over, whispering
He doesn’t listen to you, and I feel my eyes turning red
And I know that if you only lay your hand against my cheek,
I will forgive, I will forgive you endlessly, with a tender look
And I’m right, I know I am
I travel light years to be with you
I enter your world as Alice must once
Have entered wonderland
But now it palls, and I wonder,
Will you ever enter my world with the same relish and
Fervor that I give you? And my anger,
Like green kudzu, grows
And I know that if you only lay your hand against my cheek,
I will forgive, I will forgive you endlessly, with a tender look
I miss the early days when I’d drop everything
And the world waited tenderly and mistily
While we fell in love
Finally I rise like smoke from the smoldering ashes
And tell you what’s on my mind
And you come, not everyday, but you come
And I know that if you only lay your hand against my cheek,
I will forgive, I will forgive you endlessly, with a tender look
Qimissung
I had a lot of fun writing this; I hope you do, too. The contest will be open until November 5.
A wee bit of a problem with the foregoing: It sets the bar SO HIGH that it might discourage others (like me!) from entering.
Vampire's Lament
I was walking down the street
while the moon was new
searching every shadow
for some sign of death
praying to lift
me away.
Now I live a life of bloody smiles
and broken promises
tasting every lie
In the darkness I found
the black gift upon a sweet and bitter kiss
and I watched the last sunset
upon the remains of my life
always in the corner
waiting for another lost soul
see myself reflected
in their pleading eyes.
Now I live a life of bloody smiles
and broken promises
tasting every lie
Crying into the rain
once more I wish to die
but my only fate
is to put the past behind
baptized now with blood
rise anew with the moon.
Now I live a life of bloody smiles
and broken promises
tasting every lie
I love vampires; I wish I had thought of writing about them. You describe the vampires loss of humanity and haunted feelings very movingly. Great job!
Thank you, it is Anne Rice inspired
Forced to Make a Choice
The crossroads of life
Makes for a dilemma—
Other paths beckon besides the one I am on—
Voices whisper conflicting advice,
The owls hoot and the lone wolf howls—
Decision makes for a strange bedfellow…
A choice lies before me, two pathways I must choose—
Which one will bring comfort when the journey is through…
What to do, what to do
When any conclusion makes a toss-up—
I have forgotten what makes wrong or right…
I can’t count on tomorrow,
And yesterday haunts me, a wailing banshee…
I must choose, I must choose
For once I am certain
I dance the razor’s edge between life and death—
A choice lies before me, two pathways I must choose—
Which one will bring comfort when the journey is through…
Cold darkness has a chilly embrace,
The sunshine warms even if for a moment
My heart sliced to ribbons at best
The Angel of Death murmurs about resolution
But the choice is mine, mine alone and I choose
Life over destruction, hope above fear…
A choice lies before me, two pathways I must choose—
Which one will bring comfort when the journey is through…
Pendragon
© Friday, October 09, 2009
Child of the rocks,
Model of debris.
Woman in a box
Waiting to be free.
Twenty-first century fox
Seduced in the first degree.
Girls play safe on their own
And lose their grace on the well-oiled set machinery.
Cumulative locks
Weigh on the fee.
Scritinizing hawks
Ransom the key.
Innocent jerk gawks
At the spread on his knee
And savours the shocks
In the youthful game spree.
Girls play safe on their own
And lose their grace on the well-oiled set machinery
Since the virtual vox
Gave the babe eyes to see
She’ll never give talks
On her “Original Me”
Nor be a sought-after crock
For crumpets and tea.
Girls play safe on their own
And lose their grace on the well-oiled set machinery
Please don't sell yourself short. One of the many things I admire about qimissung (and you, dear Prince) is that neither of you are afraid to take artistic risks.Quote:
Originally Posted by PrinceMyshkin
I see we have some fine, new entries, Pendragon and alakungfu. Thank You for taking the artistic risk! :)
Thank You, Aunt Shecky; I believe I owe LitNet a big think you for introducing me to new styles and forms, for guiding me in new directions.
The Hack’s Lament
Where’s everybody
goin’, huh? They all want my cab.
There’s a hopeful arm up in the air,
a two-fingered whistle, hardly a tweet.
Get in, Bro – I got the time
if you got the fare.
The meter runs an unbeatable race.
Where to? Where to?
I pick ‘em all up.
The fat and the drunk, the chic and the poor.
Praise tourists from whom blessings flow!
The natives chill or cling to the door.
Some bend my ear with DeNiro impressions
or opt for impromptu therapy sessions.
A few clam up tighter than a crab.
Most tell me things I just as soon not know.
The meter runs an unbeatable race.
Where to? Where to?
Here ya go, fella.
Lotsa traffic, better brace
yourself. This is a ‘tip’? Now I can buy
myself a whole fleet o’ yellow
taxis. Ya take what ‘cha get and don’t ask why.
We're all gonna end up at the same place.
The meter runs an unbeatable race.
Where to? Where to?
Wow! Thank You AuntShecky; you really upped the ante (no pun intended) with this entry.
I would like to thank those of you who have heretofore accepted the challenge.There are just three more days left in this contest.
This contest is officially closed. Now the real scrutiny begins.
bump bump bump!
Hello everyone. My apologies for not making a decision on this contest sooner. I was busy with work, but I think I was also reluctant to say that one is the winner. I like entering these for the challenge, but this is not my favorite part.
Having said that, I would like to thank Dark Muse, Pendragon, Alakungfu, and AuntShcky for entering and trying a new form. All were excellent.
Dark Muse, as usual, you mine the forces of darkness most gracefully. It is never a tired genre ni your hands, but a place of refuge for all lost souls.
Pendragon, yours is an incisive argument for the indecisive, whoever they may be. You scored a perfect game with yours.
Alakungfu, kudos to you for writing about such a timely topic. I know you have daughters and you expressed well the dichotomy of our society between fame and self-respect.
AuntShecky, I could just hear your cab drivers quintessential voice. You are a master of the witty line.
The winner of the latest Form Poetry Contest is Pendragon. Pen, you used this form to its best advantage, I think, in arguing both the pros and cons of your narrators decision. I felt and heard both the anguish and the hope. It spoke to me. Well done.
And now it falls to you to pick the next form. :)
Congrats to Pendragon
Well, I love the villianelle form, so that will be the form for the next round, with the stipulation that the theme be "Year's End"
What is the deadline?
Sometime around Christmas, Muse, I'll wait until I get some entries to say for sure
Ok, cool
Here's a villanelle, Pendragon.
Mistake In Virtue
Melodrama skews its charm from the true and the false.
It burns its bridges direct the sheen of beauty fades,
From strident trysts to teasing walls.
The muse of music sheds her shawls,
But vigilante Siren the adventurous heart invades.
Melodrama skews its charm from the true and the false.
Fecklessness her suitor calls,
Adorning her features of love with increments and shades,
From strident trysts to teasing walls.
Echoes pierce receding halls
And rampant run meandering doubts in ranging brigades;
Melodrama skews its charm from the true and the false
And claims its victim as their heart enthralls,
One creature a servant of grim charades,
From strident trysts to teasing walls.
The hand of reason firmly calls
To threaten the spell of churning thoughts on accolades.
Melodrama skews its charm from the true and the false,
From strident trysts to teasing walls.
In the House of Mithra
Upon his throne of light
fade away the day
dawning into night.
Encroaching end near to sight
darkness will carry warmth away
upon his throne of light.
Sorrow tinged in golden delight
each age yields the way
dawning into night.
For new life to burn bright
and illuminate the gray
upon his throne of light.
Eyes shinning futures insight
shades of past memories play
dawning into night.
Earth born anew from plight
rapturous joys display
upon his throne of light
dawning into night.
Great start to hopefully a great contest. Wonderful entries, Muse and Alafungfu! Already I foresee difficulty with making a choice...
Risk Averse
Defy fate and uncork another year.
Lesser odds would make surer bettors quail.
Help us hedge this wager against stark fear.
Faith in discovering a better gear
takes a chance on a long-shot at the rail.
Defy fate and uncork another year.
What trumps the trepidation trembling near,
when buying a stock whose destiny’s to fail?
Help us hedge this wager against stark fear.
The nagging past is mocking with phony cheer.
Platitudes and promises have all gone stale.
Defy fate and uncork another year.
More life may come – or loss of what’s held dear.
Time’s both a speeding steed and plodding snail.
Help us hedge this wager against stark fear.
Shall we dare to hang a calendar where
the dream of sweet wine’s stained with bitter ale?
Defy fate and uncork another year.
Help us hedge this wager against stark fear.
The deadline will be December 31. Great entries so far.
Tick-Tock, people! Enter the contest today and be heard!
The contest is officially over, and the results are as follows:
I truly love the structure of the villianelle, and I felt that each poem was definitely worthy of winning. But in the end, there can only be one...
alakungfu:
Lovely structure and repeating lines. I just am not convinced that it fits the secondary rule of being about "Year's End".
Darkmuse:
What I really loved about your poem was the tightness of it, the ability to show an entire story in short, carefully chosen lines. Well done, my hat is off to you!
AuntShecky:
What can I say? This poem really blew me away, and is my choice for the winner of the poem form contest. You not only wrote a lovely villianelle, you nailed the "Year's End" rule very precisely! My sincere congrads!
So AuntShecky may choose the next form. I hope we have a greater number of poems in the next contest. We appear to be slacking on contests here!
You mean the ditty whose central metaphors are drinkin' and gamblin'? We demand a recount!
Seriously though, this piece came about when it dawned on me that every turn of a year is like a wager in that, despite the sorrows and disillusionment of the old year gone by, our hopes are the stakes when we make a "bet" that the new year will be better (pun intended.)
And I feel so much "better" now that this piece was chosen! I am doubly-honored because the other entries were quite good and that you, Pen, were the one who picked this. Thanks for the opportunity to select the next poetry form which is:
a triad with the theme of "a fresh start."
Of Irish and Welsh origins, the triad is an expanded version of the tercet. The triad can be either 9 or -- as in the example below --12 lines. The trick is taking three items or images and linking them together with a common bond. Some definitions state that the triad should illustrate the effect of the three things upon a person, but that's not so essential as connecting the trio together.
Whenever a person needs an example of a certain type of poem, she rarely go wrong with the virtuoso of verse, the great Swinburne. He's the "go-to guy" when it comes to demonstrating poetic forms. The following is the second of three triads the maestro wrote in 1878:
The message of April to May,
That May sends on into June
And June goes out to July
For birthday boon;
The delight of the dawn in the day,
The delight of the sky in the noon,
The delight of a song in a sigh
That breaks the tune;
The secret of passing away,
The cast of the change of the moon,
None knows it with ear or with eye,
But all will soon.
So, to recap:
1. Write a triad about "a fresh start."
2. Your poem should have either three 3-line or three 4-line stanzas, rhymed or unrhymed, but if the former, please make sure the lines have a a consistent meter.
3. Post your poem on or before January 18, 2010.
Thank you again, and I hope we'll see numerous entries!
Well done, alakungfu, Dark Muse and AuntShecky, and my congratulations to you, AuntSheckY. It was an awesome poem.
When winter turns into spring,
Life begins anew with a song
The trees gain a brand-new wardrobe
Thoughts turn to love
Love turns to a song
Rebirth of the soul
Watching the fluffy clouds
Sunlight makes a beautiful song
Warmth in the heart
Starting over again
Rejoining that sacred song
Flowers in spring
Pendragon
1/3/10