Cold Ale - The Blokes' Thread!

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01-31-2010, 10:31 PM
jocky

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gilliatt Gurgle

(green laughing smilie)

Gentlemen and lady, I apologize for being absent for such an extended period time. You see, I was down in central Texas selling rocks to a quarry.

Aside: reminder to self - Clean the Browning, pick up a box of 12 gauge buckshot.

Gilliatt

:) You are working way to hard Gilly, remember Willy Lomond and Death of a Salesman. Never trust a Browning, it has a bad habit of jamming at the most inopportune moments, apparently it only works when you are blowing down the barrel to clear the dust. :lol:

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Atheist

You just want to get close to the hooker.

Trust you to throw me a forward pass. :)

Quote:

Originally Posted by prendrelemick

So the old adage that rugby is a game played by men with funny shaped balls, is proven true.

Either that, or I am the exception that proves the rule. :)

Quote:

Originally Posted by soundofmusic

Oh no, Mrs Jocky was praying for what you lost on the rugby field that fateful day; and I, in an outpouring of feminine comradery was holding a candle at her side:bawling:

Soundo, I will remember you in my will, COST OF CANDLE: FIFTY CENTS: LAWYER DAGGETT TO COLLECT SAID AMOUNT. :)
01-31-2010, 11:56 PM
soundofmusic

Quote:

Originally Posted by jocky

Soundo, I will remember you in my will, COST OF CANDLE: FIFTY CENTS: LAWYER DAGGETT TO COLLECT SAID AMOUNT. :)

Thank you kind sir; I think the kind lawyer is planning to collect double from me...but, as he has an honest face:lol:
02-01-2010, 02:18 PM
The Atheist

Apology to northern hemisphere readers:

This summer down under has been so successful and hot that we've decided to keep it.

As of today, the earth will remain in its current position to ensure that we have all-year summer from now on.

That does mean that northerners will have perpetual winter, a matter which isn't disturbing our sleep at all.

Learn ice-fishing quickly.

Thank you for your co-operation. (No, we aren't taking any migrants.)
02-01-2010, 02:30 PM
soundofmusic

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Atheist

Apology to northern hemisphere readers:

This summer down under has been so successful and hot that we've decided to keep it.

As of today, the earth will remain in its current position to ensure that we have all-year summer from now on.

That does mean that northerners will have perpetual winter, a matter which isn't disturbing our sleep at all.

Learn ice-fishing quickly.

Thank you for your co-operation. (No, we aren't taking any migrants.)

:lol: Thank you, I can live without the hot muggy days, drenched clothes after a car trip to the grocery store, bright red skin from just looking trough the wind shield...yes, I think this is a great idea; of course, we haven't heard from our Texas, Nevada, Scottish and English friends yet;)
02-01-2010, 02:32 PM
prendrelemick

You're only doing it to become more like Australia.
02-01-2010, 02:35 PM
BienvenuJDC

I heard that Australia is trying to ban small breasted women in pornography...because it might entice pedophiles? Has anyone else heard that?
02-01-2010, 02:48 PM
prendrelemick

No. But to be honest you couldn't make it up.

They'll be seeking to limit certain other aspects too, for fear of making the Austrailian Male feel inadequate.
02-01-2010, 02:56 PM
BienvenuJDC

Quote:

Originally Posted by prendrelemick

No. But to be honest you couldn't make it up.

Don't you just love the wisdom and reason that some people give off?
02-01-2010, 03:08 PM
Satan

Quote:

Originally Posted by BienvenuJDC

I heard that Australia is trying to ban small breasted women in pornography...because it might entice pedophiles? Has anyone else heard that?

Yes, and then I rolled my eyes.

Read this for some more insight into the minds of our guardian angels:

Quote:

A 13-year-old girl and a 12-year-old boy from Valparaiso have been charged with possession of child pornography and child exploitation after it was discovered they were using their cell phones to exchange nude pictures of themselves with each other.

Source: http://www.nbcchicago.com/news/local...-82949612.html
02-01-2010, 04:36 PM
gbrekken

Oh the shame of it all-even old number 7 got bashed, and wild turkey was mistaken for an inedible suggesting regurgitation as opposed to a tasty drinkable to warm the heart next to the hearth. Does that call for another squab on the spit?

Forever winter? HMMMM no mosquitoes, the ice house stays on the lake year round, fewer social invites meaning less travel, those in need of clothing keep it on in public, never again sun-burned, no need for refrigeration outdoors, etc. In spite of all those advantages, the southern hemisphere may be in need of a revolution, or an invasionary expedition so we can avoid the migratory status. I know just the man to start it. His name is Someone Else. His cousin Nobody Else would probably sign on for life, as well as their sister Every Body (not to be confused with less endowed females from islands below the equator).

I'd still prefer a co-ed game of Twister over a similar game of Rugby (clothing optional, but only after we verify age and obtain signed releases for pictures and sworn affidavits for non-intent of gonadectomies of course).
02-01-2010, 10:27 PM
jocky

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Atheist

Apology to northern hemisphere readers:

This summer down under has been so successful and hot that we've decided to keep it.

As of today, the earth will remain in its current position to ensure that we have all-year summer from now on.

That does mean that northerners will have perpetual winter, a matter which isn't disturbing our sleep at all.

Learn ice-fishing quickly.

Thank you for your co-operation. (No, we aren't taking any migrants.)

Atheist, you have pulled some stunts in your time, but stealing the sun is not to be tolerated. Remember, the sun never sets on the British Empire. :)
02-03-2010, 12:29 AM
soundofmusic

Quote:

Originally Posted by jocky

Atheist, you have pulled some stunts in your time, but stealing the sun is not to be tolerated. Remember, the sun never sets on the British Empire. :)

I hear that New Zealand is annexing the British Empire; yeah, the Queen decided since it's all shrunk so much anyway...and yet there are so many royal mouths to feed, and so many historical buildings to maintain....;)
02-03-2010, 08:23 PM
The Atheist

Quote:

Originally Posted by BienvenuJDC

I heard that Australia is trying to ban small breasted women in pornography...because it might entice pedophiles? Has anyone else heard that?

I think it's a stunt by a porno film company, but there does seem to be some truth in it. Small-breasted women may appear less than 18, so only big boobs will be allowed in porno films made in Australia.

There doesn't seem to be anything new in that.

Quote:

Originally Posted by jocky

Atheist, you have pulled some stunts in your time, but stealing the sun is not to be tolerated. Remember, the sun never sets on the British Empire. :)

You can still have the sunsets.

Just after 3 hours of daylight.
02-03-2010, 08:53 PM
Paulclem

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Atheist

I think it's a stunt by a porno film company, but there does seem to be some truth in it. Small-breasted women may appear less than 18, so only big boobs will be allowed in porno films made in Australia.

There doesn't seem to be anything new in that.

You can still have the sunsets.

Just after 3 hours of daylight.

Same old same old then...

We weren't exposed on the slag heaps of Yorkshire as babes in arms for nowt...and we had to kill and cook our own tin of Tesco's own brand beans...
02-04-2010, 04:17 AM
prendrelemick

Eee I remember when if wor all slag 'eaps round 'ere. Afore the' tore em down to make way f' theritige park! Them were t'days .