My mrs P's psychic abilities are flawed, she "knows" I'm up to something, when I'm not (honest.)
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My mrs P's psychic abilities are flawed, she "knows" I'm up to something, when I'm not (honest.)
:D
It is all part of the male tragedy. Personally I blame our less than wise brothers who make a habit of being found out. For my part, in the court of male indiscretions, Mrs jocky has never been able to prove anything, and boy has she got psychic abilities.
Maybe Sounds can help us understand from a woman's perspective...?
Do you sense this reply Sounds?
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In my case this woman must share some of the blame.
http://i85.photobucket.com/albums/k7...na-rigg101.jpg
I wonder if it's secretly the alpha male coming out in those types - they actually want to be caught to show off that they A,can do it and B, get away with being caught.
And mine!
Even at 70, she still looks great.
Best looking Dame in history.
Perhaps you should carry a medicine bottle filled with your favorite liquors for the fancy coffee shops; tell them you're taking quinine for your heart:reddevil:
I know that fellow; he's been about since Christmas. I thought it was my dear departed second Mr Sounds; but the other day he grabed my backside firmly (something, while alive, Mr Sounds would never do)
Tell Mrs Jocky, from a lass that knows, that no matter how good it looks on the onset; having the man is better than the pension. I've noticed that since Mr Sounds has not been about the lawn tends to grow faster, the plumbing is cantankerous and all the neighborhood aged drug dealers are asking me for dates. :yikes:
Didn't Mrs. G ask for a peek inside a nice fat wallet like that:arf:
I think men are always "up to something"; it's just that they have a different meter than we ladies. For instance, I recently had a nice long talk with a former girlfriend of my former boyfriend and found that she was meeting him for drinks during the same time that I was dating him. Now his meter had a zero guilt rate; where my meter is pushing 50%:mad5:
I wonder if men are more spontaneous than women; perhaps we are smelling the phermones cooking before they rise to the occasion...
I always wonder why men ask us to prove our suspicions; we have tried and convicted you already:smilielol5: Besides, I have never known a man to admit to anything even when the evidence is staring him in the face:reddevil:
Thank you Gilliatt...I've tried to make a few points.
Actually, that is another brilliant device by men: they throw out the occasional hot female for all of us to attack so that we become distracted by the matter at hand.
Unfortunately, there is nothing more attractive to a woman than a man who shows her a good time and then, in the midst of all that happiness, dumps her for another woman:crash:
If by spontaneous you mean unorganised, then I am a very spontaneous kind a guy.
Now of that we really are innocent, We need no ulterior motive to look at a beautiful woman - its hard wired, like a woman looking at shoes.
As Mrs J always says to me " Why can't you be more like that nice Mr Ewan, he treats his wife like a real lady. " I never have the heart to tell her that Mrs Ewan's nickname is the Floosie of the Glen. The moral being that women do not like their men to be shining paragons. As Atheist points out they are quite comfortable with our little quirks, which can be ruthlessly exposed when their mood takes.
Sorry to hear about the second Mr Sounds.
Did you wear a leather outfit and spin out on a motorcycle...you must fill us in on the details:arf:
Well, actually, :reddevil: I kind of meant those acts that bypass the brain entirely; goes right from the hormone firing to the organs involved...
It's not the looking that makes us ladies bare our fangs; it's usually after the young lady has literally been "thrown to the curb". When she is still the object of our mens fancy, we spend all of our time trying to figure what witchcraft she possesses:cuss:
That is the problem with women, while men understand the concept of the "girl you marry" and the "girl you kick up your heels with"; women are always trying to make one man cover all of her bases:D
Thank you Jocky.
Which brings us neatly to the ' Forsyte Saga ' by Galsworthy. Soames and Irene were doomed from the start as the chemistry was never there. Now Irene was a strong individual as opposed to a rich no mark and she realised that a relationship based on puppy love would never work. At least in our new reality women do have a choice ' use em and abuse em ' For goodness sake Soundo don't tell anyone I have read a book, they might get the wrong idea. :D
Yes, look at Fleur, she married that rich and titled bloke (sensible girl,) but had a fling with young Jon first.
Recalling my days in the mix, it was noticeable that when I was "seeing" someone, other girls would suddenly be interested, and when I was engaged, I became the Yorkshire Warren Beatty.
I had an interesting experience in a 1963 VW. The back seat springs were a bit worn and one day, during a workout more strenuous than the car was used to, smoke suddenly started filling the car.
Two naked people jump out, followed by the billowing smoke.
After 10 seconds or so, it was apparent that nothing was actually on fire, so, having thrown on enough clothes for decency, I investigated.
The seat had been bouncing so that the metal spring was shorting out the battery (which was under the back seat) and the straw ticking in the seat had started to smoulder.
HA...yes, I remember the battery under the back seat.
The '66 was the last year that used a 6 volt system. It was always difficult to start on cold days, so you learned to park on hills (so you could roll start it) or have your gal push the car for you.
My father and I converted the electrical system to 12 volt except the horn. Imagine a 6 volt horn powered by a 12 volt battery!
Yeah, they pretty much had their way with me; you couldn't get too far on 1300cc's.
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Guys and Gal, you are never going to believe this! This morning I had an appointment with my Bank Manager, regarding what was termed in the red typed letter as a rather big overdraught. What a humiliation, I sat in a leather seat which was considerably lower than his and had to endure a multitude of adjectives, such as profligate, spendthrift, impecunious ( That one really stung ) and so on. I was about to leave in high dudgeon and tell him what I really thought, when his tone softened considerably, he put his arm round my shoulder and declared, " Now, now Mr Jocky I have been authorised to offer you a position on the board as you have the precise qualities any banking institution would die for. " What could I do but accept ? I gave him a warm handshake and just as I was leaving he winked and said " Oh! tell Mrs Jocky we want her on board as well, as she has your qualities in spades. " :)
I suspect not even Mrs J can shift money like HBOS could.
:coolgleamA: Everybody knows you're the Blokes thread intellectual; the rest of us are here for the booze and the girls...uh, oops...I'm here for the booze...where's Parker when I need him.
It's contagious...two readers in the mix:eek:
Yes, that is how it works; wierd how we women spend more time trying to impress each other than the men we are with.
I think ignoring them after paying a good bit of attention works even better; and I'm not sure, I think now, acting gay may work better than wearing a wedding band...
I'd ask...where are all the gay guys when I have a question:incazzato:
I didn't know that any german car could be considered a love machine; let alone one that looks like a mouse:skep:
God, who were you riding man, Big Bertha?
Well, it'd be an improvement on what it sounded like with the 6v - a sick frog was about the most I ever coaxed from mine!
Man, that must be one big OD!
Yeah - worst bushel-hiding in history.
;)
Actually, that's a very good question - how often gay blokes get propositioned by women. I suspect there may be a quota of women who think "If he only knew how good it can be..." Men claim that kind of thing about lesbians, but then the request for them to bring their girlfriend gives the game away.
(we are going to get in trouble in this direction!)
Nah, the springs were had it. It was a 1963 car, and the *trouble* was in about 1981. She ended up being my ex-wife, that one.
Funny coincidence, though. I used to go around with an actual Big Bertha. She was 6' and a women's rugby forward, so built to match. Gotta say, we made an impressive pair walking down the street - she was taller than most blokes and I'm 6' 3. Most people were smart enough to dodge!
On that delicate topic I am getting a wee bit concerned about my faithfull dog Turncoat. We were out for our constitutional the other morning when we passed a beautifully coiffured pink poodle attached by a lead to an equally stunning female owner. As they passed my head did a 360 degree revolution but Turncoat did not bat an eyelid and walked Imperiously on. Och maybe I am reading too much into it, he could have just been playing it cool. Still I hope the powers that be do not take offence at this post. Turncoat likes all kinds of posts. :biggrin5:
Maybe the poodle was a poof?
Maybe Mrs Jocky has been quietly training the dog to ignore dogs with female owners?
(I'd be betting #2)
Haha, sounds like your dog may be from the same lineage as Prendrelemick's pink Tup.
Here's something to listen to while you count sheep...goodnight.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M6AZN...eature=related
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Crikey!
After weeks of fine weather, we've got two former cyclones over the country. Neither appear to be likely to cause damage, but it's presently 26 degrees with 99% humidity. Even the flies are walking...
Life in a fridge looks pretty desirable right now!
Still raining here - and cloudy - getting a bit colder than late ....
Cold with blowing snow here in northern Illinois,
About 15 cm deep as of Monday evening.
The Wild Turkey is keeping me warm.
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I would really be popular with your bank manager; I seldom pass the month without one overdraft. For a while I was calling and complaining that they were just sorting the checks wrong and all the nice foreign fellows, who never argue with a lady, put the charges back in my account. Last time I ran into a New York lass who told me it was the 21st century and to deal with it:incazzato:
I must admit, gay women have me perplexed. It seems to me that if I had no interest in a particular gender, I woud not want to buy a prosthesis that does basically the same thing:skep:
That would have been a site....Does anyone remember the song about big bertha...come on Gilliatt..
I imagine Turncoat just got a lesbian or snob vibe from the poodle...did the owner give a bit of a smile and a turn of the head:nod:
I hadn't thought of that; Mrs J has always been one step ahead of the average female plotting.
Isn't there a dance with that...?
Rained and cloudy all day today; I couldn't get at all motivated. I can't imagine what it would be like to be in a place with months of cloud cover...:cold:
I think I've only ever been propositioned directly for sex by a straight woman once, and I'm reasonably sure she was a hooker. I have been groped, patted on the ***, and asked to go for coffee numerous times. One of my former co-workers guilty of all those things on several occasions, if I were a woman I would have filed a sexual harassment complaint.
Puts me in mind of this.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LtOrd4XbzfE