Christmas 2018 # 7

TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS # 31

Twas the night before Christmas
And all thru the Home
All the children were sleeping
Except little Jerome
Who pretended to sleep
So, he would be able to see
Santa arrive, but he fell asleep anyway
So, it was not to be

PREPARING THE BIRD

The best way to prepare
Your turkey this Christmas
Is to keep it simple
To minimize the fuss
To my way of thinking
The best method to apply
Is just be straight
And say “Turkey, you’re going to die”

DEAR SANTA CLAUS

Dear Santa Claus
I have been good
I thought I’d mention that
So it’s understood

I don’t want
Something practical
Something useful
Nor educational

I don’t what
Something creative
Something arty
Or constructive

I don’t want
Something sporty
Something healthy
Not outdoorsy

What I want
Is an X-Box or a PS3
So I can escape
My boring reality

But I don’t want
You to bring me a Wii
It’s just too healthy
And drains my energy

HE STOOD IN THE COLD CRISP NIGHT

He stood in the cold crisp night
Beneath the moon and the stars
And looked at the majestic vista
Imagining such a perfect night sky
Two thousand years before

WHILE THE FAMILY SLUMBER

Myriad snowflakes fall
Flakes, infinite in number
Crystals of purest white
Settle while we slumber

Early the next morning
In the gloomy light
A pure white blanket
Was greeted with delight

The kids were excited but
The presents took their focus
For their parents it was magical
To have a White Christmas

THE ROOM WAS FULL OF CHRISTMAS

The room was full of Christmas,
Steeped in the essence of the season,
Fragranced with Apple and Cinnamon,
And decorated in festive livery
Fresh cut garlands of evergreens,
Tinsel, candles and coloured lights
And on the peaceful Holy night
With the velvet drapes pulled shut
Against the bitter cold of winter
A perfect couple held each other
In the soft warm glow of firelight
And the cozy room was full of love

UNDER THE CHRISTMAS SKY

Under the Christmas sky
Their breath plumed
In the frost filled air
And the night sky
Sparkled with stars
Like diamonds sewn
To the curtain of night
And they both sighed
Beneath its majesty
And felt so blessed
To be in love beneath
Such a Christmas sky

SHOOTING A PRIZE TURKEY

Shooting a prize Turkey, with bullets
Of sage and onion, was his crime
He claimed that he was attempting
To kill it and stuff it at the same time

TO MAINTAIN A HIGH FIBRE DIET

To maintain a high fibre diet
During the Christmas festivities
We are urged not to eat deserts
And instead eat the Christmas trees

TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS # 32

Twas the night before Christmas
And all thru the Manor
Not a creature was stirring
As they’d been cooked for dinner