Toady And Toddy

There once lived two toads. One was called Toady and the other was called Toddy. Toady was called Toady because he was the picture perfect resemblance of what a toad should look like; dry, leathery skin, short legs, and he had the most toad like snout of any toads in the world. Toddy was called Toddy because he was on his own all the time ‘on his Todd.’ There was no doubt that Toddy wasn't a toad, he just didn’t have the splendid toad features that Toady had. Rumour has it that when Toddy was a tadpole an almighty storm broke out. Now this was no ordinary storm, it was one of the most thunderous, crackling and brightest storms ever to have blown, and this unfortunately for Toddy is where he bequeathed his name, as he was swept away from all of his tiny tadpole brothers and sisters never to be seen again.

On one very wet and damp autumnal afternoon, Toady and Toddy bumped into one another. They both looked at each other for a while, deciding either to carry on their daily routines or to be sincere and make acquaintance with one another. Now this was never going to be Toddy, so with the utmost consideration and politeness, Toady went on to say.
“Good day to you.” In a well-mannered tone of voice.
There was a pause.
“Good day to you too.” Toddy replied unceremoniously.
“Haven’t seen you around here before?” Toady expressed, inquisitively.
There was another pause, and whilst a slimy salivary dribble trickled from Toddy’s mouth, he replied “To be honest, I don’t know where this…..is?”
“Oh I see.” Toady said, as he then very quickly and astutely went on to inform.
“This is Tall Trees swamp, and we’re right in the middle of it.”
“Who’s Tall Trees?” Toddy asked instantly.
“Tall Trees isn’t somebody, it’s what’s in the swamp, look, tall trees.” Informed Toady, somewhat stupefied.
“Oh, right, I get it” Replied an embarrassed Toddy.

There was another pause, which quickly turned into an uncomfortable silence. They took one more awkward glance at each other and continued with their day. Both the toads were hopping around, either looking at the tall trees in Tall Trees swamp, or the shrubs, or any other noticeable thing they happened to hop over and into.

The toads learnt through time that they didn’t mind each other’s company, it was a big swamp after all, and they both knew, especially Toddy, that crossing paths with another toad was seldom something experienced. And it wasn’t long until one of the toads broke the silence, and they both knew who that Toad was going to be. So inevitably, Toady went on to ask Toddy.
“Caught any flies recently?”

Very enjoyable. I liked them reaching a point of "uncomfortable silence" which Toady finally broke.

Hmm. On one's tod. It's an expression Scots use. Don't hear it now as much as I did once Upon A Time When There Were Two Toads. I think this story needs violence ... And Sex Lots of wet slimy toady sex.