The Myth of Significance

Most of us today are haunted by the fact that we’re not actually living up to our true potential. I used to feel that way. Spending the weekdays in a blind rush to get my job done, and spending the weekends trying to redeem the fun that I’d denied myself, I used to feel sort of guilty of having a meaningless existence. When I thought about the fact that we all live for six to seven decades on average and then invariably die, leaving no trace of ourselves, mostly as if we hadn’t even existed, I asked myself, “What is the point of living in this way?”.

We all have this innate need to feel significant. And it is this constant need to feel significant that makes us ask questions about the point of living. But I think we need to ask ourselves another question. Why do we need a point, a meaning, a significance to everything?. Isn’t it this constant need for significance what leaves us feeling inadequate and out of sync with life most of the times?

Not everyone can and needs to be Steve Jobs but the pressure that the society has placed on us telling us that we are wasting our creativity, our lives on minor pursuits, not living up to our lives’ purpose or our highest potential, has given birth to a deep dissatisfaction in the consciousness of the general public, who as a result generally feel inferior and inadequate. We feel we need to make a big change in the state of affairs, to do something extraordinary, radical and to touch millions of lives to be significant. But if we stop thinking big, and start thinking small, take our eyes off the telescope and start acknowledging the things that are visible in front of our naked eyes, we will also see that we are in fact significant, significant to the millions of bacteria that thrive in our bodies, to all the people who can carry on with their lives because we do our jobs, to all the plants who use the carbon dioxide we breathe out to nourish themselves and in a million other ways. We are significant but not in the way that society would like us to be, not in a glamorous or sexy way but in a way that is much more humane and common, and devalued because it is common.

Maybe significance is good, but we all need to ask ourselves if it is really necessary or important in the grand scheme of things. To all my fellow human beings who feel that your life lacks significance, who in the middle of petty joys, stop to chide yourself about wasting time and not doing what you could or should be doing; who have exhausted themselves trying to look for significance in their lives, I invite you to stop looking. Stop tormenting yourself. Let go of that idea. Maybe the whole point of life is not being remembered, or recognized, or making a dent in the universe, but about having an experience of life that is rich, profound and satisfying and doesn’t make you feel like you need to do something in order to deserve it.

Sounds like good advice to me. Pick up a good novel and read it. What more do you need?

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Originally Posted by tshering

Maybe the whole point of life is not being remembered, or recognized, or making a dent in the universe, but about having an experience of life that is rich, profound and satisfying and doesn’t make you feel like you need to do something in order to deserve it.

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Some while ago, I was listening to Desert Island Discs in which the actor Dustin Hofman was the guest. I don't remember which records he selected but in the course of conversation he said that as a young man he'd asked his father what the purpose of life was, and his father had replied, "Son, it's all bollocks."

A no-nonsense answer if ever there was one.

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Originally Posted by mal4mac

Sounds like good advice to me. Pick up a good novel and read it. What more do you need?

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yes. don't forget adding a form of hot beverage.

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Originally Posted by tshering

But if we stop thinking big, and start thinking small, take our eyes of the telescope and start acknowledging the things that are visible in front of our naked eyes, we will also see that we are in fact significant, significant to the millions of bacteria that thrive in our bodies, to all the people who can carry on with their lives because we do our jobs, to all the plants who use the carbon dioxide we breathe out to nourish themselves and in a million other ways. We are significant but not in the way that society would like us to be, not in a glamorous or sexy way but in a way that is much more humane and common, and devalued because it is common.

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The significance of breathing is significance enough. Someone has to do it.

A past minister of my church always said that no one is special.

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Originally Posted by Buh4Bee

A past minister of my church always said that no one is special.

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in other words everyone of us is special in an ordinary way.

Being stated by a minister, it was meant in a religious context. With this understanding, it was meant in terms of God's relationship to everyone. According to this religious doctrine, we are all just as important as the next person. Meaning that no one is special. I think it stands on its own as a meaningful statement, even outside of a religious framework. I'm not sure why this seems confusing; it seems pretty straight forward to me.

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Originally Posted by Buh4Bee

Being stated by a minister, it was meant in a religious context. With this understanding, it was meant in terms of God's relationship to everyone. According to this religious doctrine, we are all just as important as the next person. Meaning that no one is special. I think it stands on its own as a meaningful statement, even outside of a religious framework. I'm not sure why this seems confusing; it seems pretty straight forward to me.

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it's not confusing. there is no need to take offense. i stated it in my own manner because to me it fits better that way.

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Originally Posted by tshering

Most of us today are haunted by the fact that we’re not actually living up to our true potential. I used to feel that way. Spending the weekdays in a blind rush to get my job done, and spending the weekends trying to redeem the fun that I’d denied myself, I used to feel sort of guilty of having a meaningless existence. When I thought about the fact that we all live for six to seven decades on average and then invariably die, leaving no trace of ourselves, mostly as if we hadn’t even existed, I asked myself, “What is the point of living in this way?”.

We all have this innate need to feel significant. And it is this constant need to feel significant that makes us ask questions about the point of living. But I think we need to ask ourselves another question. Why do we need a point, a meaning, a significance to everything?. Isn’t it this constant need for significance what leaves us feeling inadequate and out of sync with life most of the times?

Not everyone can and needs to be Steve Jobs but the pressure that the society has placed on us telling us that we are wasting our creativity, our lives on minor pursuits, not living up to our lives’ purpose or our highest potential, has given birth to a deep dissatisfaction in the consciousness of the general public, who as a result generally feel inferior and inadequate. We feel we need to make a big change in the state of affairs, to do something extraordinary, radical and to touch millions of lives to be significant. But if we stop thinking big, and start thinking small, take our eyes off the telescope and start acknowledging the things that are visible in front of our naked eyes, we will also see that we are in fact significant, significant to the millions of bacteria that thrive in our bodies, to all the people who can carry on with their lives because we do our jobs, to all the plants who use the carbon dioxide we breathe out to nourish themselves and in a million other ways. We are significant but not in the way that society would like us to be, not in a glamorous or sexy way but in a way that is much more humane and common, and devalued because it is common.

Maybe significance is good, but we all need to ask ourselves if it is really necessary or important in the grand scheme of things. To all my fellow human beings who feel that your life lacks significance, who in the middle of petty joys, stop to chide yourself about wasting time and not doing what you could or should be doing; who have exhausted themselves trying to look for significance in their lives, I invite you to stop looking. Stop tormenting yourself. Let go of that idea. Maybe the whole point of life is not being remembered, or recognized, or making a dent in the universe, but about having an experience of life that is rich, profound and satisfying and doesn’t make you feel like you need to do something in order to deserve it.

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This is so well said! Profound!

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Originally Posted by tshering

Most of us today are haunted by the fact that we’re not actually living up to our true potential. I used to feel that way. Spending the weekdays in a blind rush to get my job done, and spending the weekends trying to redeem the fun that I’d denied myself, I used to feel sort of guilty of having a meaningless existence. When I thought about the fact that we all live for six to seven decades on average and then invariably die, leaving no trace of ourselves, mostly as if we hadn’t even existed, I asked myself, “What is the point of living in this way?”.

We all have this innate need to feel significant. And it is this constant need to feel significant that makes us ask questions about the point of living. But I think we need to ask ourselves another question. Why do we need a point, a meaning, a significance to everything?. Isn’t it this constant need for significance what leaves us feeling inadequate and out of sync with life most of the times?

Not everyone can and needs to be Steve Jobs but the pressure that the society has placed on us telling us that we are wasting our creativity, our lives on minor pursuits, not living up to our lives’ purpose or our highest potential, has given birth to a deep dissatisfaction in the consciousness of the general public, who as a result generally feel inferior and inadequate. We feel we need to make a big change in the state of affairs, to do something extraordinary, radical and to touch millions of lives to be significant. But if we stop thinking big, and start thinking small, take our eyes off the telescope and start acknowledging the things that are visible in front of our naked eyes, we will also see that we are in fact significant, significant to the millions of bacteria that thrive in our bodies, to all the people who can carry on with their lives because we do our jobs, to all the plants who use the carbon dioxide we breathe out to nourish themselves and in a million other ways. We are significant but not in the way that society would like us to be, not in a glamorous or sexy way but in a way that is much more humane and common, and devalued because it is common.

Maybe significance is good, but we all need to ask ourselves if it is really necessary or important in the grand scheme of things. To all my fellow human beings who feel that your life lacks significance, who in the middle of petty joys, stop to chide yourself about wasting time and not doing what you could or should be doing; who have exhausted themselves trying to look for significance in their lives, I invite you to stop looking. Stop tormenting yourself. Let go of that idea. Maybe the whole point of life is not being remembered, or recognized, or making a dent in the universe, but about having an experience of life that is rich, profound and satisfying and doesn’t make you feel like you need to do something in order to deserve it.

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This is so profound. Although I agree with this as a personal philosophy there are times where others can affect our lives in a negative way if we have low status i.e. relationship choices, networking ability, social connectivity - and these can (sorry to say, but true for all) affect my happiness. Although I am happy enough to live a 'clam like' existance drawing, writing and taking photos etc...without status I have limited opportunities for reproduction, social interaction, and yes - survival in times of extreme crisis when social connectivity can save your life(i've seen that first hand in Bosnia - not many years after they held the Olympics).

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Originally Posted by tonywalt

This is so well said! Profound!

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Thank you. It came from the heart.