Please add your own title.

Arseholes, wankers,
f uckwits, droopytits.
Twats with tourettes,
poets wringing s hit from rainbows
and colours from crap.
Dutch cap, phallic strap.

Arse munchers, pubic lunchers,
fellatio fans.
Fly swallowing maniac,
cum swapping insomniac,
s hit tasting, gastronomic.
Sluts with crabs, incontinents,
golden shower debutantes.

Zealots, crazed creationists,
bully boys, sex toys,
drug riddled, paranoids.
Anti Semitics, botox aesthetics,
cops and robbers,
dribbling blow jobbers.
Alcoholics, catholic priests
and choir boy frolics.

Halitosis, hairy toes,
crusty nose, panty line shows.
Camel’s foot, foot rot,
snot, bigots, idiots,
heretic, philistine,
what’s yours is mine.

It's a bottom of the barrel buffet of ideas! Do I have to swallow though?

You seem to be flinging an awful lot of sh1t.

I'm not sure I see a purpose behind the slew of depravities, but this would make for an excellent rap.

Speaking as a phallic strap and also a little bit of a f uckwit, this reader finds this poem degrading!





J

Maybe taking after Rilke songs: "What the Priest Hears"

Tourettes would certainly explain the compulsion to subject us to this.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Hawkman

Tourettes would certainly explain the compulsion to subject us to this.

---

Tourettes would produce more repetition.

Sounds like an open mic night at a Howard Stern poetry jam.

A bit disappointed that nobody suggested a title.

This piece of work explored the paradox of how we choose the act of making love and sexual body parts as our main terms of abuse.

I jest of course ( although I may have got away with that as an excuse for 'subjecting' you to this). In reality I was just having a
f ucking ball :cuss:.

I doubt I offended anybody, but if I did, great.

FF suggested a title. And so will Jack of Hearts: "Dear Mother, Camp is Dandy."





J


EDIT: That's actually pretty interesting, in your response there JB. But this reader didn't pick up on all that. The crux seems to come in the last line, which suggested to the reader that the narrator was just calling himself the obscenities he listed? Well, since that interpretation was wrong, and if nothing else, somebody learned a lot of new words today.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Jerrybaldy

A bit disappointed that nobody suggested a title.

This piece of work explored the paradox of how we choose the act of making love and sexual body parts as our main terms of abuse.

I jest of course ( although I may have got away with that as an excuse for 'subjecting' you to this). In reality I was just having a
f ucking ball :cuss:.

I doubt I offended anybody, but if I did, great.

---

I didn't feel like you "explored" any paradox, maybe you did while writing it, but I didn't see it in the piece. I think you just rymed a bunch of naughty words, and, in my opinion, in a less than creative way... that was more offensive than the content, imo..


Also, Hawk suggested "Tourettes" as a title? I second the motion.

Actually mine was more an observation than a suggestion for a title. firefangled did actually suggest one though.

I can't claim to have been offended, merely depressed that someone who I know can write, and write well, felt it necessary to expose his inner naughty schoolboy to public view. Hopefully, having dropped his trousers, he's got it out of his system and can get back to writing something worth reading.

Jerry- If you delivered this to the right audience, I think a lot of people could have a good laugh. And I am not talking about The 50 Shades of Gray crowd.

How about Many Shades of Fornication?

How about a long title:

Everybody's Screwed Up 'Cept Me and You (And I'm Not So Sure About You)


That's not my best title for this, but I can't post that one 'cause it's too political!

"Leave the door open, I have not finished?"