Dreams are really very odd

DREAMS ARE REALLY VERY ODD # 01

Dreams are really very odd
Last night I sat up in bed
Clutching a pillow to my chest
And then I loudly said
I’m off up the garden
To bury the dog
My wife barked “You silly sod,
We haven’t got a dog”

DREAMS ARE REALLY VERY ODD # 02

Dreams are really very odd
Last night my wife sat up and said
“Tell Lionel to stop
It’s really hurting my head”
I enquired politely
What the hell she was on about
“Lionel Blair is in the wardrobe
Get the tosser out”
Now considering the early hour
I had the patience of Job
And softly said “Why would he
Be in our wardrobe”?
A fare question, I thought
She just gave me a frown
“Tap dancing you idiot”
And then she lay back down

DREAMS ARE REALLY VERY ODD # 03

Dreams are an odd part of life
Last night my considerate wife
Woke me from my slumber to declare
“It was so bloody unfair”
I said “what on earth is wrong?
“What’s unfair, what’s going on?
“The life of a sports journalist”
She replied and she wasn’t even pissed