examples of hyperbole and euphemisms in literature?

Hello all!

I desperately need good examples of hyperbole from literature. From what I understand of it, hyperbole is exaggeration and could be used to add colour to a situation, in the sense to make a piece of writing more humourous and enjoyable for the reader. I've been googling for ages trying to find something interesting but all I get are statements like I could eat a horse.

Could the following sentence be called a hyperbole? If not, does any other figure of speech apply to it?
My feet are probably cursing the day they were adjoined to my ankles - such is the pain. (brought about by a pair of shoes with a snug fit)

I also need a couple of examples of euphemisms and a paradox (from literature). The only one I can think of right now is for a paradox (that was so obviously stated) in the Pirates of Penzance play - http://math.boisestate.edu/gas/pirat...pirates18.html
But that's a little long to include as an example (there's a limit of 500 words).

Do Oscar Wilde quotes fall into any particular classification of figures of speech? Witty quotes such as 'A man's face is his autobiography. A woman's face is her work of fiction.' or 'A gentleman is one who never hurts anyone's feelings unintentionally.'

If you can help, please do. Thank you! :)

please, just a couple of pointers would be nice! :(

“The distinguished scientist Herr Professor Luitpold Blumenduft tendered medical evidence to the effect that the instaneous fracture of the cervical vertebrae and consequent scission of the spinal cord would, according to the best approved traditions of medical science, be calculated to inevitably produce in the human subject a violent ganglionic stimulus of the nerve center, causing the pores of the corpora cavernosa to rapidly dilate in such a way as to instantaneously facilitate the flow of blood to that part of the human anatomy known as the penis or male organ resulting in the phenomena which has been dominated by the faculty a morbid upwards and outwards philprogenitive erection in articulo mortis per diminutionem capitis.”

You say Tomayto I say Potaato

An hyperbole is as simple as calling a needle a sword, and a euphemism a sword a needle.

'The sun was like a ripe orange in the sky' (euphemism)

'There's something wrong with the voltage supply of my deskfan. It's creating a gale like a jet turbine (hyperbole'

re Euphemisms (see here):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4vuW6tQ0218

Wikipedia tells me that Mark Twain's short story 'Nevada Funeral' has a lot of euphemisms for death too. I haven't checked it though, you might want to.

This is probably too late of a reply for you but in act 4 or Romeo and Juliet, Lady Capulet asks Juliet: "What, wilt thou wash him from his grave with tears?" with regard to the recently slain Tybalt. Classic hyperbole. That's one I could think of off the top of my head. Shakespeare is full of it though. (Hyperbole, that is)

Open up to any random page of a Shakespeare anthology, and you'll find everything you need.

@Alakazam: o_O
@MystyrMystyry: I'd say potaato too! Your examples are very interesting.
@Silas_Thorne: That is such an ideal video for the purpose, hilarious! I've never heard that many synonyms (euphemisms I suppose) for dead :D
'This is a late parrot!' :lol:
@tomt: I don't remember that one.. I really should read Romeo and Juliet again.
@blackbird_9: Shakespeare just didn't strike me as I sat down for the assignment. I'm motivated to read more of him now.

Thanks a lot everyone :)