The Lady of Mine

The Lady of Mine

Once, that fair lady passed me by
In a sward of thorny dead roses.
Life she bade in me, and the world
of mine changed; O! Her gleaming
Dark eyes; O! Her black sunlit hair
Flown above me, I stumbled.

She was the essence of destruction,
The beauty of ugliness, the life of the dead.
All, my lady included - of wholeness and
Emptiness of memories; O! Her memory
In my life; O! that lady did pass me by
And turned my day into long night.

Mine world did collapse, when I saw
The flowery cheecks of wounds and lesions
Wished I to see her the next day
Of Salvation; O! Her bright skin
Lit the way; O! The lady of mine fled
Away, and was gone so that I live again.

Beautiful, love the dark imagery

No mistakes can be spotted,your modus operandi of writting it is outstanding.By the way,I would like to clarify something doubtful,which is-why did you describe the black hair which was sunlit(refer to the fifth stanza )?The hair was black,and there could be no legitimate reason why it was sunlit.

Dark Muse thanks a lot for the comment, I appreciate it.

wilbur lim, this is a comment I cherish. Concerning the black sunlit hair of the 5th verse: I enjoy contradiction in poems, the well written ones. If you notice the rest of the poem contains a lot of contradictory sentences and especially those that belong to the dark image.

When reading the first stanza, mentioning dead roses and thorns, I imagined an unilluminated view where the lady walked. Although her hair was black, I still saw it as if it was illuminated by the sun. Thus, I tried to pour light indirectly into the bleak scenery, that there was some hope existing, that she made me realize there was something still alive around me. After bidding that tiring life in me (for I stayed awake all the nights for her, I thought pretty much about her), she died "so that I live again".

Why was "sunlit" used to the black hair precisely and not anything in the poem? Because I have this strange thing to black hair, which some people (at least those I`ve known) refer to it as a source or sorcery, but I do refer to it as a source of attraction.

Great!!
your poem is great. But i want to ask a question :)
""The beauty of ugliness, the life of the dead.""
I know about the life of dead, but would you explain the beauty of ugliness?

Thanks :)

These are strikingly beautiful, horribly touching. There are things, antagonizing things, mutually averting.

I like the way striking contrasts were in place.

that is beautiful! "The beauty of ugliness, the life of the dead," especially, stood out. I know what you mean, and this is a brilliant context to put it in.

Thank you all for the cordial feedback.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by mercy_mankind

Great!!
your poem is great. But i want to ask a question :)
""The beauty of ugliness, the life of the dead.""
I know about the life of dead, but would you explain the beauty of ugliness?

Thanks :)

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The beauty of ugliness, is everything ugly you see, really ugly?
This one is deep, it lacks having one meaning.
The meanings it holds are:
Her ugliness itself is beautiful.
She makes "ugly" look "beautiful"



Actually guys when I write, one verse doesn`t hold one meaning. It holds many meanings and sometimes they are completely different. And I am ready to provide explanations of my poems of all sides.

I liked the quotation at the bottom.

Wow... this poem is wonderful! You captured me by the words you used and its overall meaning. Every line was described vividly and beautifully.

Mostly when I read poems, I easily get bored, but this... this is an extraordinary piece of writing. Well done! :)

I thankfully treasure this.

O! How I wished I was good as that!
Just Reading the very makeup of the poem
Casts me into the Darkness of Dispair
O! How I Could write like that
And I should be content!

Seriously...get a publisher!!!!!

^^ Can`t find one yet...
Okay okay, I am not so confident, that`s the problem :P
Thanks, xx