Hamlet Essay...Need Refining and Critique

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07-03-2008, 01:54 PM
shadman

Hamlet Essay...Need Refining and Critique

The topic is on: "Write an essay demonstrating how Shakespeare reveals that a character's experiences, beliefs, morals, and/or needs affect his/her behaviour and choices."

I would like some opinions on the essay in general, as well as some ideas on what else to write. So far this paper is ~600 words, I need to get it up to 1000. I realize that the conclusion isn't done yet, so I'm assuming that's going to bump it about 150 words.

If i could get some ideas on what else I should add it would be greatly appreciated.

Enjoy!

Society and the interactions that take place are all built on decisions. These choices, no matter how significant, materialize thousands of times throughout the day, and while the majority of them are minor in significance, there are rare occasions where the resulting conclusion can have life-altering results. Some of these results may have been foreseen whereas others may have been more unpredictable, but the basic problem solving for each decision remains the same. The needs of a person are at the utmost priority, such as one’s life -- including the fundamental needs of food, water and shelter. From there it branches off into many different ways that is all determined by one’s personality and the circumstance they are in. Morals, beliefs, past-experiences, and needs all fuel a person’s decision, which has ultimately not changed since the beginning of mankind’s existence. In Shakespeare’s writings, his depiction of characters his plays are well thought out and are almost given a life of their own. In Hamlet there is no exception

Mahatma Gandhi once said "An eye for an eye will make the whole world blind." It's known that revenge causes one to act through anger, rather than reason. In a world like the one we live in today, revenge is thought as being barbaric and adolescent. In the play Hamlet by William Shakespeare Young Fortinbras, Laertes, and Hamlet were all looking to avenge the deaths of their fathers. Every one of the three eldest sons had one thing in common, they all wanted revenge for a slaughtered father. In the time in which this play is set, avenging the murder of a father was part of one's honor, and had to be done. All of the three sons swore vengeance, and then acted towards getting revenge for the deaths of their fathers. They all acted on emotion, this was the main reason that lead to their downfall. They let revenge poison their minds and didn't give justice a chance to deal with their problems. Shakespeare attempts to show how one's state of mind can become corrupted when they allow emotions to take over.

In the play Hamlet, fear was a major motivating factor in the character’s decisions and actions. Namely Hamlet was fearful of being caught and forced to pay the consequences for the crimes he has committed. Hamlet debates whether or not suicide can be a good decision when life is so filled with pain and suffering. He wonders and seems to think that death may be the most peaceful decision. However, he is kept on the path of life by his fear of what lies beyond the grave.

Throughout the play Hamlet thinks about the moral aspect of revenge, and as a result his goal to avenge his father's death is delayed. Morality is defined as a set of ideas or actions that are considered right and wrong, and this becomes a factor in Hamlet's revenge. When Hamlet sees King Claudius praying he is held back by his moral considerations. This is seen when he goes to kill King Claudius and says, "Now might I do it pat, now he is praying;...That should be scanned" ( ). Here Hamlet shows how he wants revenge, but also shows how he is thinking too much about the consequences and the morality of killing while one is in the face of god.
07-11-2008, 12:17 AM
Beewulf

Quote:

Originally Posted by shadman

The topic is on: "Write an essay demonstrating how Shakespeare reveals that a character's experiences, beliefs, morals, and/or needs affect his/her behaviour and choices."

Society and the interactions that take place are all built on decisions. These choices, no matter how significant, materialize thousands of times throughout the day, and while the majority of them are minor in significance, there are rare occasions where the resulting conclusion can have life-altering results. Some of these results may have been foreseen whereas others may have been more unpredictable, but the basic problem solving for each decision remains the same. The needs of a person are at the utmost priority, such as one’s life -- including the fundamental needs of food, water and shelter. From there it branches off into many different ways that is all determined by one’s personality and the circumstance they are in. Morals, beliefs, past-experiences, and needs all fuel a person’s decision, which has ultimately not changed since the beginning of mankind’s existence. In Shakespeare’s writings, his depiction of characters his plays are well thought out and are almost given a life of their own. In Hamlet there is no exception

Mahatma Gandhi once said "An eye for an eye will make the whole world blind." It's known that revenge causes one to act through anger, rather than reason. In a world like the one we live in today, revenge is thought as being barbaric and adolescent. In the play Hamlet by William Shakespeare Young Fortinbras, Laertes, and Hamlet were all looking to avenge the deaths of their fathers. Every one of the three eldest sons had one thing in common, they all wanted revenge for a slaughtered father. In the time in which this play is set, avenging the murder of a father was part of one's honor, and had to be done. All of the three sons swore vengeance, and then acted towards getting revenge for the deaths of their fathers. They all acted on emotion, this was the main reason that lead to their downfall. They let revenge poison their minds and didn't give justice a chance to deal with their problems. Shakespeare attempts to show how one's state of mind can become corrupted when they allow emotions to take over.

In the play Hamlet, fear was a major motivating factor in the character’s decisions and actions. Namely Hamlet was fearful of being caught and forced to pay the consequences for the crimes he has committed. Hamlet debates whether or not suicide can be a good decision when life is so filled with pain and suffering. He wonders and seems to think that death may be the most peaceful decision. However, he is kept on the path of life by his fear of what lies beyond the grave.

Throughout the play Hamlet thinks about the moral aspect of revenge, and as a result his goal to avenge his father's death is delayed. Morality is defined as a set of ideas or actions that are considered right and wrong, and this becomes a factor in Hamlet's revenge. When Hamlet sees King Claudius praying he is held back by his moral considerations. This is seen when he goes to kill King Claudius and says, "Now might I do it pat, now he is praying;...That should be scanned" ( ). Here Hamlet shows how he wants revenge, but also shows how he is thinking too much about the consequences and the morality of killing while one is in the face of god.

Hi shadman,

I enjoyed reading your essay! I think you've got a flair for language and passion for wanting to express yourself powerfully.

Here are some things I noticed.

1. In your introduction, establish the general theme of decision making and then move purposefully to the specific topic of your paper. Keep that up.

2. There are places in your introduction where an absent word or a circuitous expression interfere with my grasp of your writing. For example,

Would it be clearer to write: "Society and the interactions that take place in society, are built on"

3.
07-11-2008, 12:22 AM
Beewulf

Quote:

Originally Posted by shadman

The topic is on: "Write an essay demonstrating how Shakespeare reveals that a character's experiences, beliefs, morals, and/or needs affect his/her behaviour and choices."

Society and the interactions that take place are all built on decisions. These choices, no matter how significant, materialize thousands of times throughout the day, and while the majority of them are minor in significance, there are rare occasions where the resulting conclusion can have life-altering results. Some of these results may have been foreseen whereas others may have been more unpredictable, but the basic problem solving for each decision remains the same. The needs of a person are at the utmost priority, such as one’s life -- including the fundamental needs of food, water and shelter. From there it branches off into many different ways that is all determined by one’s personality and the circumstance they are in. Morals, beliefs, past-experiences, and needs all fuel a person’s decision, which has ultimately not changed since the beginning of mankind’s existence. In Shakespeare’s writings, his depiction of characters his plays are well thought out and are almost given a life of their own. In Hamlet there is no exception

Mahatma Gandhi once said "An eye for an eye will make the whole world blind." It's known that revenge causes one to act through anger, rather than reason. In a world like the one we live in today, revenge is thought as being barbaric and adolescent. In the play Hamlet by William Shakespeare Young Fortinbras, Laertes, and Hamlet were all looking to avenge the deaths of their fathers. Every one of the three eldest sons had one thing in common, they all wanted revenge for a slaughtered father. In the time in which this play is set, avenging the murder of a father was part of one's honor, and had to be done. All of the three sons swore vengeance, and then acted towards getting revenge for the deaths of their fathers. They all acted on emotion, this was the main reason that lead to their downfall. They let revenge poison their minds and didn't give justice a chance to deal with their problems. Shakespeare attempts to show how one's state of mind can become corrupted when they allow emotions to take over.

In the play Hamlet, fear was a major motivating factor in the character’s decisions and actions. Namely Hamlet was fearful of being caught and forced to pay the consequences for the crimes he has committed. Hamlet debates whether or not suicide can be a good decision when life is so filled with pain and suffering. He wonders and seems to think that death may be the most peaceful decision. However, he is kept on the path of life by his fear of what lies beyond the grave.

Throughout the play Hamlet thinks about the moral aspect of revenge, and as a result his goal to avenge his father's death is delayed. Morality is defined as a set of ideas or actions that are considered right and wrong, and this becomes a factor in Hamlet's revenge. When Hamlet sees King Claudius praying he is held back by his moral considerations. This is seen when he goes to kill King Claudius and says, "Now might I do it pat, now he is praying;...That should be scanned" ( ). Here Hamlet shows how he wants revenge, but also shows how he is thinking too much about the consequences and the morality of killing while one is in the face of god.

Hi shadman,

I enjoyed reading your essay! I think you've got a flair for language and passion for wanting to express yourself powerfully.

Here are some things I noticed.

1. In your introduction, establish the general theme of decision making and then move purposefully to the specific topic of your paper. Keep that up.

2. There are places in your introduction where an absent word or a circuitous expression interfere with my grasp of your writing. For example,

Would it be clearer to write: "Society and the interactions that take
place in society, are built on"?

Would it be better to make the second sentence active: "People make
decisions, both great and small, throughout the day" rather than passive?

Since you are referring to something that happens in time, "when" is preferred to "where."

3.
07-11-2008, 12:41 AM
Beewulf

Quote:

Originally Posted by shadman

The topic is on: "Write an essay demonstrating how Shakespeare reveals that a character's experiences, beliefs, morals, and/or needs affect his/her behaviour and choices."

Society and the interactions that take place are all built on decisions. These choices, no matter how significant, materialize thousands of times throughout the day, and while the majority of them are minor in significance, there are rare occasions where the resulting conclusion can have life-altering results. Some of these results may have been foreseen whereas others may have been more unpredictable, but the basic problem solving for each decision remains the same. The needs of a person are at the utmost priority, such as one’s life -- including the fundamental needs of food, water and shelter. From there it branches off into many different ways that is all determined by one’s personality and the circumstance they are in. Morals, beliefs, past-experiences, and needs all fuel a person’s decision, which has ultimately not changed since the beginning of mankind’s existence. In Shakespeare’s writings, his depiction of characters his plays are well thought out and are almost given a life of their own. In Hamlet there is no exception

Mahatma Gandhi once said "An eye for an eye will make the whole world blind." It's known that revenge causes one to act through anger, rather than reason. In a world like the one we live in today, revenge is thought as being barbaric and adolescent. In the play Hamlet by William Shakespeare Young Fortinbras, Laertes, and Hamlet were all looking to avenge the deaths of their fathers. Every one of the three eldest sons had one thing in common, they all wanted revenge for a slaughtered father. In the time in which this play is set, avenging the murder of a father was part of one's honor, and had to be done. All of the three sons swore vengeance, and then acted towards getting revenge for the deaths of their fathers. They all acted on emotion, this was the main reason that lead to their downfall. They let revenge poison their minds and didn't give justice a chance to deal with their problems. Shakespeare attempts to show how one's state of mind can become corrupted when they allow emotions to take over.

In the play Hamlet, fear was a major motivating factor in the character’s decisions and actions. Namely Hamlet was fearful of being caught and forced to pay the consequences for the crimes he has committed. Hamlet debates whether or not suicide can be a good decision when life is so filled with pain and suffering. He wonders and seems to think that death may be the most peaceful decision. However, he is kept on the path of life by his fear of what lies beyond the grave.

Throughout the play Hamlet thinks about the moral aspect of revenge, and as a result his goal to avenge his father's death is delayed. Morality is defined as a set of ideas or actions that are considered right and wrong, and this becomes a factor in Hamlet's revenge. When Hamlet sees King Claudius praying he is held back by his moral considerations. This is seen when he goes to kill King Claudius and says, "Now might I do it pat, now he is praying;...That should be scanned" ( ). Here Hamlet shows how he wants revenge, but also shows how he is thinking too much about the consequences and the morality of killing while one is in the face of god.

Hi shadman,

I enjoyed reading your essay! I think you've got a flair for language and passion for wanting to express yourself powerfully.

There are places in your introduction where an absent word or a circuitous expression interfere with my grasp of your ideas. For example,

Would it be clearer to write: "Society, and the interactions that take
place in society, are built on"?

Would it be better to make the second sentence active: "People make
decisions, both great and small, throughout the day" rather than passive?

Since you are referring to something that happens in time, "when" is
preferred to "where": "there are rare occassions when"

Try using parallelism in the "predicted" sentence: "Some of these results
were foreseable while others were unpredictable."

Consider combining the third and second to last sentence to make your thesis more forceful: "Because Shakespeare creates characters who base their decision-making process on their morals, beliefs, and experiences, they possess fully developed identities."

I hope you find these comments useful and keep up the good work.
07-11-2008, 07:51 AM
shadman

Thank you for your comments, they were very helpful!
07-11-2008, 08:52 PM
Gladys

Quote:

Originally Posted by shadman

They all acted on emotion, this was the main reason that lead to their downfall. They let revenge poison their minds and didn't give justice a chance to deal with their problems. Shakespeare attempts to show how one's state of mind can become corrupted when they allow emotions to take over.

There is no reason to believe that, given time, justice would have dealt with Hamlet's problem at all. Remember that Claudius was a king.

Some of your assertions are too sweeping. The issue is how, why and where emotion drives Hamlet, Laertes and Fortinbras. I think, at least in respect of Hamlet, there's much to say. I don't feel that your essay makes the character of Hamlet the vibrant and living human being that he is in the play, in that you imply his life problems have solutions. I'm not sure that they do.

I would suggest you explain something of the different political and moral environments in which Hamlet, Laertes and Fortinbras grew up. Why do they address problems, and see life, in the way they do? If Shakespeare writes well, the actions of all his characters will be plausible. The more plausible a character's behaviour is, the more alive.

By the way, I didn't respond earlier because your essay seems, more or less, sound.
01-01-2009, 09:51 PM
whiteangel

Quote:

Originally Posted by shadman

The topic is on: "Write an essay demonstrating how Shakespeare reveals that a character's experiences, beliefs, morals, and/or needs affect his/her behaviour and choices."

I would like some opinions on the essay in general, as well as some ideas on what else to write. So far this paper is ~600 words, I need to get it up to 1000. I realize that the conclusion isn't done yet, so I'm assuming that's going to bump it about 150 words.

If i could get some ideas on what else I should add it would be greatly appreciated.

Enjoy!

Society and the interactions that take place are all built on decisions. These choices, no matter how significant, materialize thousands of times throughout the day, and while the majority of them are minor in significance, there are rare occasions where the resulting conclusion can have life-altering results. Some of these results may have been foreseen whereas others may have been more unpredictable, but the basic problem solving for each decision remains the same. The needs of a person are at the utmost priority, such as one’s life -- including the fundamental needs of food, water and shelter. From there it branches off into many different ways that is all determined by one’s personality and the circumstance they are in. Morals, beliefs, past-experiences, and needs all fuel a person’s decision, which has ultimately not changed since the beginning of mankind’s existence. In Shakespeare’s writings, his depiction of characters his plays are well thought out and are almost given a life of their own. In Hamlet there is no exception

Mahatma Gandhi once said "An eye for an eye will make the whole world blind." It's known that revenge causes one to act through anger, rather than reason. In a world like the one we live in today, revenge is thought as being barbaric and adolescent. In the play Hamlet by William Shakespeare Young Fortinbras, Laertes, and Hamlet were all looking to avenge the deaths of their fathers. Every one of the three eldest sons had one thing in common, they all wanted revenge for a slaughtered father. In the time in which this play is set, avenging the murder of a father was part of one's honor, and had to be done. All of the three sons swore vengeance, and then acted towards getting revenge for the deaths of their fathers. They all acted on emotion, this was the main reason that lead to their downfall. They let revenge poison their minds and didn't give justice a chance to deal with their problems. Shakespeare attempts to show how one's state of mind can become corrupted when they allow emotions to take over.

In the play Hamlet, fear was a major motivating factor in the character’s decisions and actions. Namely Hamlet was fearful of being caught and forced to pay the consequences for the crimes he has committed. Hamlet debates whether or not suicide can be a good decision when life is so filled with pain and suffering. He wonders and seems to think that death may be the most peaceful decision. However, he is kept on the path of life by his fear of what lies beyond the grave.

Throughout the play Hamlet thinks about the moral aspect of revenge, and as a result his goal to avenge his father's death is delayed. Morality is defined as a set of ideas or actions that are considered right and wrong, and this becomes a factor in Hamlet's revenge. When Hamlet sees King Claudius praying he is held back by his moral considerations. This is seen when he goes to kill King Claudius and says, "Now might I do it pat, now he is praying;...That should be scanned" ( ). Here Hamlet shows how he wants revenge, but also shows how he is thinking too much about the consequences and the morality of killing while one is in the face of god.

hi,

here is what I think:
The introduction needs to be directly linked to the question at hand.

The reason that Hamlet does not kill Claudius in the chapel scene is because if hamlet did, then Claudius would go to purgatory instead of hell - and Hamlet does not want this....he wants Claudius to suffer eternally- his REVENGE must be eternal and so he wishes to kill Claudius while he is in "the pleasure of his incestuous sheets" or another sin- he is not questioning the consequences here.

It might be good to link the filial duty of the three sons to revenge and than link that to their character responses and what that suggests about their morals etc.

hope it helped.