Apathy undermines the purpose of what it means to live
I guess you could say this work inspired me to start this thread.
Oh, and I don’t swear that much, so be sure to understand how upset I really was.
****n’ A man.
I was walking to the back door to go inside. The sun’s rays yielded little heat upon my wind-blown face when I saw this black splotch of a figure on the grass next to the driveway. I realize that this black blob is actually a cat that’s lying down.
a cat ... lying ... out in the open ... I’ve never seen that before ...
ah sh**
I hope it’s not dead
I approach the cat and it lifts it head to the sound of my feet.
o cool, it’s alive. Guess it was just resting out in the sun.
Curious to see if there really is a cat simply lying about in the open, I walk up to the cat and it rises on its fore-legs.
ah sh**.
There’s a serious wound on it’s back and there is what appears to be blood oozing out of the wound. It begins to cry. I echo its cry in sympathy.
I call my parents and run to my grandparents to ask them what to do and ultimately no one wanted me to do anything but just let it lie there.
Bullsh**.
I go back to the cat and sit with it for a while. We cry.
it’s shivering! it’s eyes are about to close! hey man, hang in there, you’re going to be alright! everybody makes choices; this is life and death; you’re going to choose life. you’re a trooper.
I leave the cat.
I go inside where we keep the three domestic cats, all of which would have had to live in the wild, but we took them in. I look at them and they look at me like they do.
Pet me! Pet me! you aren’t going to pet me are you?
A slight, paper-thin rage slips into my mind.
you F******! all you do is sit around all day and do nothing. you don’t have to worry about surviving! we just give you your food every day and you eat it and sleep and lie in the warmth of this house! F******! there are cats our there fighting for their lives every day and you don’t even have the capacity to realize what a frikin great life you have. F******.
I got angry.
I remembered an episode a few months ago with my dad.
“Look at’em dad. They don’t have to worry about anything. They don’t have to do anything. They eat sleep and eat and poop. [I think about how nice it would be to be a cat because I am relatively stressed... or perhaps apathetic... to life and feel that people keep on wanting my time and I just want to, well, sleep all day. Like the cats.]”
“Yeah, but it seems like a pretty futile existence though.”
“Yeah I guess so. [still thinking that it might be worth it.]”
And after seeing that cat outside and these cats inside....
F***n’ A man!
I don’t even know.
f*** dude, i don’t even know
that’s just messed up
I sigh.
I can either play xbox
or
Write.
I remember
“In the end, all you have left is the work.”
What does that mean? what work?
... ... ...
oh, the Work
xbox
Write
I remember
“it seems like a pretty futile existence though”
So I wrote.
I had something to say and I wrote.