https://www.online-literature.com/forums/blog.php?63893-OrphanPip The largest classic literature discussion forum on the Internet. Read Write Teach Share. en Fri, 05 Jun 2026 03:55:27 GMT vBulletin 10 https://www.online-literature.com/forums/images/misc/rss.jpg https://www.online-literature.com/forums/blog.php?63893-OrphanPip https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?12676-Uncertain-Fate-for-Transgender-Rights-Bill Wed, 28 Nov 2012 01:11:16 GMT I've decided to write a bit about a current bill, that is currently before a Parliamentary committee, which would make explicit the extension of Canada's Human Rights provisions to transgender persons.

The bill hasn't got much media attention at all, and like usual transgender issues are ignored unless they are being used for some salacious thrill on daytime talk shows. There are two main reasons why I wanted to try and do a little publicity for the bill.

First of all, the bill's future is precarious at the moment as 15 Tories have pledged to support its passage. If all of the left of centre MPs supported the bill, another 6 Tory abstentions or supporting votes would be required to get it into law. It is rare in Canadian politics that a bill could go either way, and I think a little more attention could help pressure some of the Tory brass to quietly whip a few members into supporting its passage.

Secondly, I've been a bit incensed by the substance of the debate from Tory critics of the bill. MP Rob Anders spread a petition which implied that transgender women (which he mistakenly refers to as transgender men) are pedophiles, or perverts looking to lurk in women's bathrooms for the purpose of assaulting women. Or, that such perverts would be able to hide under the protections of transgender identity to freely invade women's changing rooms.

This line of argument is problematic in a number of ways. First of all, transgender women already use women's bathrooms, it is usually not an issue, and the extension of anti-discrimination laws wouldn't change that. A few provinces already have extended these protections, and none of the ridiculous scenarios Anders proposed have occurred. Finally, it is baseless fearmongering as there is no evidence of transgender women sexually assaulting women or children, at least no more than the regular population.

All of this brings me to why extending anti-discrimination legislation for transgenders is necessary. Trans people, out of every minority in Canada, are the most likely to be the victim of a violent assault by a stranger, and indeed the most likely to be murdered. This fact alone should be evidence enough that we are not doing enough to protect these people. Another Tory MP, Shelly Glover, has spoke out in favour of the bill because of her experience as a police officer witnessing the violence inflected on trans Canadians. This bill would be an important step to affirm equality for sexual minorities in Canada, and allow Canada to stay at the forefront of progressive human rights protection. ]]> OrphanPip https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?12676-Uncertain-Fate-for-Transgender-Rights-Bill https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?12636-What-I-ve-Been-Up-To-Thoughts-on-Graduate-School Tue, 30 Oct 2012 02:22:05 GMT Hello Forumites,

It has been a while since I last communicated with everyone through one of my self-indulgent blog posts. Unfortunately, I don't really have any pressing concerns to spill my heart out about, which leaves that most mundane of blog genres: the update.

Leaving aside my romantic misadventures in recent days, I've enjoyed the experience of meeting lots of new people through my MA cohort. As a Montreal local, I get to play the role of guide quite often, and I enjoy the petty sense of superiority this provides. Moreover, the ratio of women to men leaves with the distinct feeling that humanities departments are probably a great place to pick up chicks, if you don't mind women who will pretentiously pontificate on the subject of rap lyrics. I haven't yet recovered from the experience of having the ironic potential of "Can I Smell Yo' Dick?" explained to me repeatedly by a girl whose thesis involves contemporary Canadian song lyrics (of course she's in a band you've never heard of too).

Anyway, most of my time has been preoccupied by my own fumbling research. I hope to complete my research proposal by Thursday so that it can be read by some professors, who will hopefully write in support of my grant applications. I'm applying for a competitive federal grant worth about 18,000, as with anything involving academia or the government there is quite a lot of bureaucratic nonsense involved with getting the application done. My current proposal is a project on the theatrical origins of the protagonist in Eliza Haywood's early novels, I like to refer to it as "Reading the Actress in the Early novels of Eliza Haywood." I think that's a pretty pithy title. What I'm trying to assess is the relationship between Platonic/Anti-theatrical/Popular discourses about imitation and the role of the actress shape the reception and representation of Haywood's protagonists in Fantomina and The Masqueraders. Basically, what I'm doing is using the feminist interpretations of actresses and masquerade in these early works as a launching pad, but focusing on how prose markets, and the medium itself, forces a change in the representation of "actresses" in prose. Asking the question not so much what do these representations tell us about women in the Eighteenth Century, but what does it tell us about ideas of acting in the period.

My only major work completed so far this semester has been a seminar presentation on Classical male-bonds in the Faerie Queene, and how Renaissance anxieties about classical pederasty manifest themselves when the models of friendship are translated by, and for, a Christian readership. The paper was well received by my professor and the other students, so I was quite happy. I'm currently working on a presentation on Milton that is not really developed, and I'm working on a translation of Bede from an Old English translation of the Latin original.

Oh yes, I've also had my first experience in the role of some kind of educator while grading papers. I found the experience a bit frustrating because students do not follow directions, but I put a lot of extra work (unpaid mind you) into giving detailed advice on how to improve their papers. Coming up in two weeks I'll be participating in a panel discussion on "What You Wish you had Known About Graduate School Before Applying" for the undergraduate student association. It's being organized completely by us MAs for the benefit of the undergrads, so I hope they benefit from it.

I'm still hunting for a supervisor, there are three main candidates I'm interested in working with for various reasons. One is on sabbatical, so I have had not had a chance to meet him. Of the other two, one is certainly more of a specialist in the area I'm working in, but she has the personality of a fence post. The other is a contemporary theatre scholar, but I get along with her a lot better.

Well that's pretty much all that occupies my life lately.

Cheers ]]> OrphanPip https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?12636-What-I-ve-Been-Up-To-Thoughts-on-Graduate-School https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?12221-Making-an-odd-decision Sat, 11 Feb 2012 00:17:55 GMT So, I haven't done a blog in a while, but I'm going to seek lit-net's advice on a subject. Some of you may know that I've been working part-time on a B.A. since completing my microbiology degree. I've never really liked lab work, and though I love science, I don't love doing science. At first I started studying the arts, political science and literature primarily, as a hobby taking advantage of subsidized education in Quebec.

Now, I will receive my B.A. in April, and on a whim I decided to apply for a M.A., at McMaster University in Hamilton, Ontario. Because they have a really good program in 17th-18th century literature, which I have a passion for.

And then today, bizarrely, I got accepted.

Now lit-net I pose a question to you, should I do this?

As I see it:
Pros:
Well there's little going on in my life professionally or of any interest.
I was offered sufficient funding to make this readily affordable for me.
I think it would be a really interesting experience.

Cons:
Little professional benefit to be gained from earning this M.A.
Not sure I'm really committed to this.
Have to relocate to Hamilton from my beloved Montreal. ]]> OrphanPip https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?12221-Making-an-odd-decision https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?11577-Save-my-Forest! Fri, 22 Apr 2011 05:25:05 GMT Well for a little while I've known about this weird society dedicated to the protection of a little forest on the Western part of the Island of Montreal.

The thing about the forest is that it happens to be named after my family. It is on the part of the island where my family came and settled in 18th century, back then we had some money and clout in the region. 200 years later we were a bunch of dairy farmers, time changes everything ;).

A little nagging part of me has this devilish inclination to go join this society, out of pure vanity, to protect my family's legacy. Ha.

http://www.apaw.ca/?page_id=27 ]]> OrphanPip https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?11577-Save-my-Forest! https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?11559-The-Red-Light-is-Just-About-Put-Out Tue, 05 Apr 2011 19:16:29 GMT I am inspired to write about a local news item I read today. There is a street in Montreal officially called Boulevard Saint-Laurent, but most... I am inspired to write about a local news item I read today.

There is a street in Montreal officially called Boulevard Saint-Laurent, but most often affectionately called the Main. It has historically been the dividing line between English and French Montreal, as a result it was a no man's land that created room for immigrants to carve out their own space in the city. As a result, the Main was also a street that was largely populated by some of the poorest members of Montreal society.

Today, the Main is at the center of Montreal's China Town, Little Italy, Little Portugal, and the artsy, oh-so-trendy, and bohemian Plateau (which used to be one of the poorest working class French neighbourhoods). However, the area I really wanted to talk about in this blog is at the corner of Saint-Laurent and Sainte-Catherine, the red-light district. Or, what's left of the red-light district. The city has stopped giving out bar and nudity licenses, has increased police presence to force out the prostitutes, and most recently a few years ago attempted to evict most of the business to build a "Quartier de spectacle."

Shutting down the district was largely successful, but one club remained and fought the initiative in court, Cafe Cleopatra. A club best known for drag and fetish shows, particularly transvestite and transsexual strippers. And this club was at the core of the fight to protect what was left of the Red-light district by preventing the building of the new theater district. CC claims to be an institution, even if it is a sleazy institution. The club also has very close historical ties to Montreal's gay community. Since the red-light district use to be the center of Montreal's gay community before being pushed to the even slummier neighbourhood East of the Main. Being pretty much the oldest place in Montreal to openly host drag shows since the 70s.

Well after 2 years of fighting, CC somehow managed to win, the investor pulled out of the project and the club seems safe for the moment. But does a handful of remaining clubs, even those as bizarre as Cleo's really make a red-light district?

Now, why do I care about whether Montreal has a red-light district anymore? Because the sex trade should be centralized and in the open to protect sex workers. Sex-worker advocacy groups have criticized the crack down on the district harshly for pushing prostitutes into more residential, less busy, dangerous, and more out of the way locals. Does shutting down a red-light district clean up the city, or is it merely white wash on a rotten fence?

For this reason, I think the city should embrace the red-light district, just as it has in recent years embraced the Gay Village. When the city puts money into these places, instead of persecuting the workers, patrons, and business owners, they can make real improvements.

http://www.montrealmirror.com/wp/201...or-the-belles/ ]]> OrphanPip https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?11559-The-Red-Light-is-Just-About-Put-Out https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?11524-The-Voice-Behind-the-Door-a-poem Wed, 16 Mar 2011 01:45:19 GMT I found this going through my stuff today, I'm not sure I'm entirely fond of it. I rarely write poetry for anything other than passing time so I don't mind writing bad poetry :p.

The Voice Behind the Door

Life pinned to a bed, is a
Peculiar joy:
Hot breath, suppressing weight,
The heartbeat rising-

KEEP IT DOWN!

Does he guess the
Source of the excitement?
Boys will be boys,
They're loud and
sweaty.

Shh, keep it down.
I can't help it,
hormones.

Laughing brings punishment,
Quiet sighs go unnoticed.
As long as it doesn't travel
beyond the door.

I TOLD YOU TO KEEP IT DOWN! ]]> OrphanPip https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?11524-The-Voice-Behind-the-Door-a-poem https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?11409-Gay-Cinema Thu, 03 Feb 2011 02:16:09 GMT I haven't written a blog entry in a little while, so I wracked my brain to think of something interesting to write. This entry will likely be followed up soon after with another component of the Autobiography, which I've neglected for too long.

As the title says, this entry will address gay movies, mostly because it's a question I hear a lot from other gay people. Do you know any good gay movies? I love going to the cinema, and I'm fortunate enough to live in a city which has a gay film festival annually in the summer, so I get a chance to go to screenings of obscure movies at times.

One I recently attended involved a lecture on the overlap between Crip Theory and Queer Theory, and was followed with the film Otto, or Up with Dead People, a movie about a guy who thinks he's a zombie and gets cast in a movie billed as a "gay zombie porno." If you think this movie sounds strange, it is. The person giving the talk apparently thought it was an enjoyable combination of disability and queer issues since it combined physical disability (being a zombie) with being gay. The movie is a laugh if you can enjoy horrible pretentious art movies, and it involves graphic zombie sex, which I don't think can be found anywhere else.

Now onto discussing some gay movies in general. I think there is pretty much 4 main categories of gay cinema.

The first category is the Hollywood apologetic, films that are all about showing that gays are people too, in case you weren't sure of that beforehand. I would include Philadelphia, Broke Back Mountain, and Milk in that category. Transamerica is another one, but that's about transgenders. Those examples are good movies, but they aren't very interesting movies. None of them really does anything too daring or new.

The second category is what I would term the queered-Hollywood-generic-plot genre. These are films that copy the usual formulaic crap produced by Hollywood, and just make everyone gay. So, this includes a whole slew of gay romantic comedies, dramas, and usual garbage. Some are decent, just like some formulaic Hollywood movies are decent. A decent recent example of this is Shelter, a romantic drama about surfers that is so-so. I would maybe include in these films the sub-genre of the magical gay fairy land where practically every character in the film is gay as a way to avoid dealing with any pesky social realities.

The third category is the impossible to ignore Coming Out film. These films are usually also combined with a typical love story, bullying plots, and occasionally the bigoted parent story. They usually involve teens, like Beautiful Thing and Get Real, two British coming out films that are quite good for what they are. An American example of the top of my head would be Edge of Seventeen, though I'm less fond of that movie. These films also tend to have a typical political message, but tend to be less didactic than the Hollywood gay films.

The fourth, and final, category is the experimental or subversive film, like the zombie movie mentioned above (or really any film by Bruce LaBruce). I'm going to give a paragraph to each film I want to mention in this category to give them each their due.

Shortbus - here is a film about sexual diversity, although a gay couple is a major part of the plot there are also heterosexual characters. The film concentrates on different conceptions of sexual freedom and exploration, and revels in the excess of it. It also features unsimulated sex, but it's not filmed like a porno, giving it an interesting feel, a bit like a less tiring Caligula. In this situation, I think it's more than just erotica, it's form simply mirroring content.

Funeral Parade of Roses - This is a bizarre, bizarre, experimental film in the tradition of French New Wave from 1960s Japan. It was apparently a major influence on Stanley Kubrich. What I love about the film is the intimate look at Tokyo gay subculture, mostly drag queens, at a time when such Western ideas were pretty fresh in Japan. There are meta-cinematic elements, like a "sex scene" where the camera then pulls out to reveal that it is a foot massage and that a camera crew is there filming it. There are also interviews where individuals speak about what it means to be a drag queen (or a simply a queen as they term it in the movie) and what it means to be gay.

Totally F*cked Up - this is a Gregg Araki film, I had to include one film from what is termed the New Queer Cinema, mostly a group of New York based film makers working in making gritty dark gay themed films in the 90s. This is a film that follows, sort of in a fictional documentary style, the life of a group of lesbian and gay teens. It isn't exactly an exciting film, but it addresses a lot of central themes in a lot of gay media. Notably it addresses the issues of the general polyamorous behavior of the gay community, and the issues of dealing with infidelity, alienation, AIDS, and such that arise from it. As an example of Araki's usual take on this stuff, the gay couple that champions monogamy in the film is of course broken up by cheating, and of course they're torn up about it. It raises the questions of if gay people can fit into the usual relationship frameworks that are tailored really to heterosexuals, and what does it mean for gay people to want that heteronormative lifestyle.

Honorable mentions to My Own Private Idaho, Mysterious Skin, The Boys in the Band, and Hedwig and the Angry Inch. I should also mention a lesbian film worth watching, it's kind of campy and horrible but a groundbreaking early representation of lesbianism in film, Personal Best. ]]> OrphanPip https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?11409-Gay-Cinema https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?11144-Giovanni-s-Room-James-Baldwin Mon, 01 Nov 2010 20:03:14 GMT Along with Gore Vidal's The City and the Pillar, Baldwin's Giovanni's Room is one of the most widely read of gay literature, probably the most widely read by heterosexuals. However, it has long been a problematic text for gay readers, particularly gay African American readers.

Baldwin was actively involved with the civil rights movement, but shied away from the gay rights movement. He proudly fought along the lines of African American identity politics, was involved in forming a positive image of African Americans, but his one gay novel does little to affirm homosexuality. To put it succinctly, Baldwin has often been accused of being a self-deprecating homosexual, and guilty of perpetuating negative stereotypes. Nonetheless, he was still one of few major American authors to tackle the issue.

For those unfamiliar with the novel. It is about the affair of a white American, David, with a young Italian man, Giovanni, while living in Paris. David has money issues, and ends up living in Giovanni's room, though of course the room itself is a symbolic representation of the containment of David's homosexual desire. The typical psychoanalytical interpretation involved in the liminal spaces and liminal character that David is. He's never grounded, he's in transition, and the homosexual is a liminal person. I don't like to spoil endings, but things don't turn out so well for David, and especially bad for Giovanni.

Personally, I'm not one to trash Baldwin's effort in this novel. He tries to put forward an argument against the repression of homosexuals, he tries to show suffering as a result of the lack of acceptance. Nonetheless, I have to admit that Baldwin is hardly the most enlightened of gay writers, he displays a lot of resentment and negativity towards homosexuality. In large part I'm willing to forgive this because it is a first person narrative in David's voice, and he is the epitome of the self-loathing homosexual. The troubling implication is that this is the book that is the most widely read by heterosexuals and is often encountered early on by homosexuals looking through gay literature, it's probably not the best novel if we're concerned with the social implications. It's another one of those gay novels that perpetuated the image of the permanently unhappy gay man, there really rarely is a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow in gay lit.

The most striking criticism I've come across has come from African American gays. Many of whom resent Baldwin's unwillingness to directly tackle the issue of black gays. An issue largely erased historically, unmentioned and impossible to admit to a public discourse at the time so heavily concerned with establishing the legitimacy of African Americans. Instead, Baldwin chose to write his novel about white people, in fact he establishes the whiteness of his narrator from the very first page. Some, have argued rather convincingly that the characters are subtly codified as black anyway, and argue that the novel really does say something very controversial by rendering the issues of race and sexuality ambiguous. Though, it doesn't help to ablate the subtle resentment of what is perceived as a lack of courage by Baldwin to tackle the issue of the duel hardships, of racism and homophobia, that black gays faced in the 60s.

Ultimately, if we remove the novel from its social and political implications, we're left with a rather convincing narrative of an individual in conflict with social expectation and his desire to fulfill them, and in many ways it's a rather conventional tragedy as it is his desire to remain socially acceptable that is his undoing. The novel is tightly structured, and Baldwin shows his usual love of symbolism. It's a good novel, even if I sometimes worry over the impression it might give to young gay readers. Moreover, just because of how widely read it is, it's nearly impossible to ignore for anyone interested in LGBT literature. ]]> OrphanPip https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?11144-Giovanni-s-Room-James-Baldwin https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?11033-Some-questions-for-LitNet-and-some-recent-events Tue, 28 Sep 2010 05:11:44 GMT Well I haven't made a blog post in a long while, so I figured it was about time to do one.

The NHL season is about to start, just got home from a pre-season game, we beat Florida 6-2, but Florida's not a very good team to begin with. So far, I'm not sure we have a team much better than last season, we'll probably make the playoffs again this season but I don't see a cup coming, even if we made it to the division semi-finals last time.

Since my surgery, I'm back at work, and back to the monotony ;). That's about all I have to say about that subject. My jaw feels great, my muscles don't hurt anymore and I'm pretty satisfied with the surgery, 1500 dollars well spent I suppose.

I've bought a subscription to 3 of the 6 operas of the season. Next Thursday I'll be going to see Verdi's Rigolleto, and I also picked up tickets for Strauss Salome and Puccini's La Boheme. So, I'm looking forward to that next week. Got a great deal through my bank, they're trying to attract patrons under 30 so I got my tickets for around 40% of the regular price.

My mother will be having cataract surgery in the next couple weeks. She'll be getting two artificial lenses, she's looking forward to having her eyesight restored. It would have been earlier, but the surgeon broke her arm and my mother chose to wait rather than have it done by a doctor she doesn't know. In a similar vein, my father will be having heart surgery sometime in the next year to replace one of his valves. The surgeons want to wait as long as possible without risking a heart attack, to avoid having to do unnecessary surgery to replace the valve. I guess the hope is that he'll be dead before the artificial valve's expiry date. Hopefully, they'll both get through surgery without any problems. My mother's eye surgery in particular shouldn't be a problem since it's routine and there's no anesthesia involved. My brother is off in Europe for a conference in Amsterdam and then is off to Germany for Octoberfest.

That's about all the news of note about me and my family.

Now onto the other part of the blog post title. I've been reading a lot of Queer Theory lately, mostly Sedgwick and Butler, as well as some Foucault. Normally, I'm not so much of a constructivist. But, often with post-modernist thought I find it interesting, if not always convincing. What I'm really interested in, is not so much the validity of the ideas put forward by the aforementioned philosophers, but what the impact and prevalence of that kind of thought in our society is. I'm wondering if some ideas from 1980s gay philosophers (and some not gay ones too) has permeated the public's perception of homosexuality.

So, I've devised an entirely unscientific survey, I would like anyone willing to, whether your views towards homosexuality are positive, negative, or indifferent, to share their opinion. I don't have a problem with people sharing their opinions in this blog, but if someone just wants to PM me some thoughts to keep some level of anonymity, that would be fine too. Answering just one question would be worth doing because I don't expect too hefty a response.

Questions:

1. To what degree, if any, do you think biological factors play in determining the sexual preferences and behaviors of individuals? And, on the other hand, to what degree, if any, do you think cultural factors play in determining sexual preferences and behaviors of individuals.

2. Do you think homosexuality is intrinsically linked with gender deviance, i.e. to put it simplistically, do you think male homosexuality is linked to effeminacy in men, and the reverse with lesbians.

3. Do you think sexual orientation and behavior is fluid throughout an individuals life, or is it fixed? This is not to ask if you think sexual orientation can be changed willingly, but if people's sexual preferences are fluid and change throughout their life, "subconsciously," so to speak.

4. What relationship do you think perceptions of biological or cultural determination of homosexual behavior has to the permissibility, acceptance, or affirmation, of that behavior in society.

5. A common alternate construct of human sexuality is that of the "universal bisexual," that is that everyone is born with the natural capacity for sexual attraction to others of the same sex. Do you think there is any validity to this idea?

6. What relationship do you think the development of cultural identifications, and developments of homosexual communities with organized political groups, has effected the perception of homosexuals in your society?

7. Any other thoughts, I'd like to hear anything about what people think. ]]> OrphanPip https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?11033-Some-questions-for-LitNet-and-some-recent-events https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?10746-Part-VI-Papa-Can-You-Hear-Me Thu, 22 Jul 2010 06:49:40 GMT No, this entry in my autobiography is not about the influence Yentl and Barbra Streisand have had on my life. Jun's recent blog post on her father reminded me that I haven't posted to my autobiography in a little while. So, as a self-identified trend following conformist, this entry will address my father.

My father was born in South Eastern rural Quebec, a little bit North of the Vermont border, sometime in the 1940s. He grew up on a large dairy farm, on land my family had owned for around 200 years. When he was 16 my father dropped out of high school, jumped on a train and headed out West. He ended up working as a coal miner in Saskatchewan for a few years. Eventually, he got a job working for the Canadian Pacific Railroad in Northern Manitoba, in Churchill to be specific. My father is obsessed with trains, he loves them to an extent that I never quite understood. We frequently go to see old trains and museums, where my father can talk for hours about the engines, designs, and uses of the trains. Last summer we went out to see a steam locomotive near Ottawa.

Through CPR he received his high school diploma and became a plumber, eventually ending up with a stable job at CPRs offices and rail yards in Montreal. Sometime in the 70s he met my mother and they got married. My father used to have long ginger hair, and if pictures are any indication, he's had the same mustache for 40 odd years. As far back as I could remember, my father's hair has always been grey.

Another defining feature of my father is his dyslexia. A constant problem for him, I don't think he's ever spelled my name properly. He's remarkably good at math and has a great memory for an eclectic amount of trivia. I'm sure he was failed by the education system. He's not a stupid man, but he wasn't able to finish high school because of the limitations of special education at the time.

As to his personality, my father has the gift of the gab. All my life, he's embarrassed me by engaging complete strangers in conversation, my mother attributes this to him being a country bumpkin. Personally, I share almost no interest with my father apart from hockey and politics, so that's what we discuss. My father is a union man, progressive to the core, which we have in common. Likewise, the Habs have always brought the entire family together.

When I was younger I was a total ******* to my father. I have to admit I disliked him a lot when I was young. I hated being dragged to hockey practice every week, I hated his cheesy jokes, I hated how distant he was, and I just hated him in general. This was probably partly the result of my mother's influence.

There's one memory that sticks with me from when I was around 8 or 9 and I saw my father shoplift something, and I remember being very disappointed. Honestly, that's typical of my father, he lies and cheats, but at least he always came home.

It wasn't all conflict between us though. We would go camping and fishing, and I think we were happy doing that. Pretty sure my father would have been happier with a more outdoorsy son instead of the queer bookworm biologist, but you can't have everything can you.

As I got older my opinion of my father has mellowed a bit. I've grown to appreciate his standoffish behavior for the tolerance that extends from it. My mother can't help but get her fingers into every little thing I do, but I can rely on my father's support without the interference. My father is flawed, but I think he can be counted on to do the right thing. I appreciate how hard he worked, when he would leave at 6 in the morning and return after 9 at night. He'll go out of his way to help you if you ask for it. Often he's over at the neighbours houses fixing up their broken junk.

Anyway, we can always get together these days and talk about the Habs or complain about what the Tories are up to. My father has been a stable rock, I don't have any exceptional complaints, he's a good man even if we've always been a bit distant from each other.

edit: Oh and here's the only picture of us together I have on my computer, not a great one.

]]> OrphanPip https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?10746-Part-VI-Papa-Can-You-Hear-Me https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?10684-Back-home-from-the-hospital Thu, 08 Jul 2010 21:42:10 GMT Well it was a quick 36ish hours in the hospital. Everything went well without much complication. The surgeon accidentally pinched a piece of my... Well it was a quick 36ish hours in the hospital. Everything went well without much complication. The surgeon accidentally pinched a piece of my tongue wiring my jaw shut, so I woke up with my tongue stuck to a side of my mouth and ended up fighting to rip out my tongue and leaving a little piece of it behind with the teeth. Anyway, I kind of feel like crap now that I've been off the morphine pump for a little bit, but while I was in the hospital the pain was minimal, and it was mostly just boring and uncomfortable. It's still kind of difficult to move, every little bit I shift my body seems to put some sort of strange pressure on my jaw. Good news was there was no oozing or pus present after surgery, and the swelling is apparently not the worse they've seen. My recovery was relatively fast and I finally got some movement back in my lips today, at first they were so swollen I just barely get them open enough to get a straw in. I'm still spilling half of what I drink all over myself, but straws are no longer required.

Worse of all, I look like a young Churchill with all this swelling, and I'm carrying a pad and paper at all time because no one can understand me. Gah.

For the next week I'm on penicillin, codeine, what I think is a chlorahexadine rinse for my mouth, an anti-inflammatory for the swelling, and an annoying icepack that only stays frozen for like 30 minutes in this weather). I'm only allowed water, juice from concentrate, and nutrient replacement fruit drinks from Boost for the first week so that nothing gets stuck in the surgical wounds. After that I can eat anything that can be turned to liquid in a blender.

I'm thinking my mouth is going to be incredibly gross after 6 weeks of only using mouth wash. ]]> OrphanPip https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?10684-Back-home-from-the-hospital https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?10651-Surgery-surgery-surgery Sat, 03 Jul 2010 15:24:43 GMT I just felt like announcing a biggish event in my life. Anyway, all my life I've had somewhat of a problem with my jaw, being born with a severe under-bite and misalignment tilted upper jaw that makes it difficult for me to chew food properly and I get regular jaw pain/head aches.

So, after a long while of preparation, and saving up for bills, on Wednesday I will be going in to have the jaw surgery performed to fix my jaw problems. I'm a little worried because this will change the structure of my face, making my chin less pronounced, and I'm not having the surgery done for aesthetic reasons.

Otherwise, except for some extra pre-op services I paid the surgeon for, the surgery (at whopping 20k) is covered by medicare luckily. The surgery is supposed to be short and low risk, but I opted for an older method that is quicker and involves less risk of nerve damage. The downside of this method is that it also requires a longer period of healing, and having the jaw wired. The way I look at it is, it's better to have my mouth stuck shut for a few weeks than a life of permanent paralysis in my face.

So, wish me luck everyone. If I don't post after Friday in the coming week, I died in surgery ;). ]]> OrphanPip https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?10651-Surgery-surgery-surgery https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?10504-The-City-and-The-Pillar-Gore-Vidal Mon, 07 Jun 2010 12:20:36 GMT I don't usually write book reviews in my blog, but I've recently finished reading Vidal's The City and The Pillar for the second time. Clearly, if I'm willing to read this book twice, I must have some sort of high opinion of it.

The novel follows Jim Willard, a young man from Virginia, from his last days of high school in the 1930 to the end of WWII. Over the course of the book Jim lives in Hollywood, Mexico, and New York, and spends a brief period in the military. The central theme of the work centers on Jim's obsession with his childhood best friend, who he experience a brief fling with. Jim is focused on recapturing the past, but Vidal sums up the problem with this goal in the final chapter: "Nothing that ever was changes. Yet nothing that is can ever be the same as what went before." Without spoiling the ending, Jim manages to recapture that past experience with his friend, but in a twisted, terrible, and unsatisfying way. (This interpretation works best with Vidal's 1960s rewriting of the novel, because the original 1948 ending is stupid)

Now, most critics I've read agree that the book is not Vidal's greatest work on a technical level. However, when it comes to influence and social relevance, it comes out far ahead of his other work. It is generally considered the first major work of fiction that addresses homosexuality as something normal (Forster's Maurice was written in 1913 but only published posthumously). I'm not much of a literary critic, so I think what I'll discuss here is why the book continues to resonate with me, even in a second reading.

At the most superficial level I appreciate the novel as a time-capsule, a glimpse into a unique period of gay culture. The period that lies between the formation of a definitive modern conception of "gayness" as an identity and the beginning of sexual liberation in the late 60s and 70s. Most of the gay characters in this novel are neurotically obsessed with not being found out, which is understandable given the legal repercussions that would have entailed. In particular, I enjoy a brief scene at a party where a group of intellectuals discuss if the essence of the queer is effeminacy or hyper-masculinity.

The main reason why I appreciate this novel so much, besides its historical importance for gay fiction, is the position of Jim as an alienated individual in a marginalized group. Mostly I find Jim, as a character, to be pretty empty and unbelievable at times. However, he serves to illustrate something important. He is different from all the other gay characters, who are often nothing more than caricatures. Vidal makes an important statement with Jim, that the stereotypes are often true, that sexuality shapes an individual's character, but it does not define it in its entirety. ]]> OrphanPip https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?10504-The-City-and-The-Pillar-Gore-Vidal https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?10459-The-end-of-the-playoffs-for-Montreal Thu, 27 May 2010 23:24:23 GMT Oh it was a wild ride for the Habs this season. They barely made the playoffs, squeaking by with a single point gained in a tie game against Toronto.... Oh it was a wild ride for the Habs this season. They barely made the playoffs, squeaking by with a single point gained in a tie game against Toronto. They came back from behind to beat the top seeded team in the league, the Washington Capitals. When things were looking bad again they managed a second come from behind victory against the defending Stanley Cup champions, the Pittsburgh Penguins.

In the end, they were crushed in 5 games by the Philadelphia Flyers, the 7th seeded team. Much like the Habs this year, the Flyers were also had a wild ride, coming back to win an amazing 4 games in a row against Boston after losing the first 3 of the series.

So, the playoff finals this year will be between Chicago and Phillie. Chicago has been a much more solid team season long, and I'm pretty confident they'll take the cup. Phillie is ripe for an upset though.

On another note, hockey is practically a religion in Montreal. The city shut down for every single one of Montreal's Playoff games. Game 7 of the Pittsburgh series was broadcast live in the Bell Centre to a sold out crowd. That's right, they were able to cell out the arena just to watch it on TV. (This raised something like 5 million for charity as well)

The Habs are by far the most successful franchise in the NHL, having won nearly a quarter of Stanley Cup finals. It would be nice to bring Lord Stanley's Cup back home to where it originally came from over 100 years ago. I was 6 years old when the Habs last won the cup. I'm still relatively young, so hopefully I'll get to see them win at least one more cup in my lifetime.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cD5pc...eature=related

Edit: This short film about a mix up over a hockey sweater is based on a very influential short story.

The story is quoted on the back of the Canadian five dollar bill.

"Nous vivions en trois lieux : l’école, l’église et la patinoire; mais la vraie vie était sur la patinoire." - We lived in three places: the school, the church, and the skating rink; but our real life was on the skating rink. ]]> OrphanPip https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?10459-The-end-of-the-playoffs-for-Montreal https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?10440-Pride-or-no-Pride Sun, 23 May 2010 00:05:52 GMT There is an obvious running theme throughout my blog post, which is gay issues. Well today's blog is no different ;).

So, I recently had a little conversation with a friend where I got a little uppity about the use of the word faggot. My friend responded that I shouldn't worry about the use of the word because I'm "just gay" and not "one of those faggots." Of course, I asked what the difference was. Apparently, I'm not a faggot because I don't "wear sparkingly underpants while marching in 'Gay Pride' parades" and don't "act like I think I should be treated like a God."

This isn't the first time I've encountered antagonism against Gay Pride festivities and this apparent view that gays consider themselves superior to others (I've actually heard this from Drizzy on the forum lol). While the prevailing topic in my blogs do nothing to discredit the notion that gays are self-absorbed, I think there is a great deal of ignorance surrounding people's perception of Gay Pride. Now, I don't think anyone is at fault for this. After all, what does the media ever show but men in drag dancing on floats. I hope to change people's perception of these celebrations by discussing the history of Pride celebrations, what it means today, and why I think the celebrations are an important part of LGBT culture.

The history of Pride parades goes back to the Stonewall Riots, in New York City during June of 1969. These riots marked the first time a major number of LGBT physically resisted police. A year after the event a politically motivated march was held to commemorate this important event. Similar commemorations were made in San Francisco, and eventually all over the USA. The early marches were often called Gay Liberation marches or Gay Freedom marches, they were rallying points for the gay community in resistance to the very real legal oppression that existed at the time. As a result of the subversive nature of these marches, radical aspects of the gay community, like overt sexuality and drag, were often highlighted.

Over the years, the marches in Canada, the USA, and Western Europe have lost much of their political activism colour. The need to fight against police violence and obscenity trials has subsided. Instead of being about "liberation" they changed into cultural celebrations. Gay Pride has prevailed as the most common name for these celebrations, which are still often held on the same day as the Stonewall Riots or near by in June.

The celebration of the subversive, and rather "colourful," aspects of gay culture continue to be an important part of the marches. Political activism also remains an important aspect, often with memorial floats for AIDS victims and political activism still included. The celebrations have taken on a form closer to the light hearted celebrations of St. Patrick's, Canada Day, or the 4th of July in the US.

Now, why are Pride celebrations important? Apart from the money the larger celebrations bring in from tourism. The parades are a symbol of freedom in our society, as long as the parades continue it is a sign that sexual freedom exists. The attempts at pride parades in Russia are forcefully shut down by the police, in many countries they are plagued by protest and sometimes violent resistance, several cities and countries in the less than free world explicitly ban them. Even if you're like me and don't particularly enjoy flashy floats blasting dance music, it's the fact that our societies allows these kinds of celebrations that make them great.

In many places where gay rights are only just emerging, these celebrations are still rallying points for resistance. In the West, they are a cultural celebration that commemorates a time when being openly gay wasn't possible, so once a year the community gets a little extra-gay to remind ourselves of that time.

I hope this helps people who think that the celebrations are just about gays having a big party for no reason or being "Proud" about being better than others.

Edit: I promise my next blog will be about hockey, as soon as the playoffs are over for Montreal. ]]> OrphanPip https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?10440-Pride-or-no-Pride