https://www.online-literature.com/forums/blog.php?48858-Poems-general-writings-ravings-and-other-things The largest classic literature discussion forum on the Internet. Read Write Teach Share. en Fri, 05 Jun 2026 05:04:03 GMT vBulletin 10 https://www.online-literature.com/forums/images/misc/rss.jpg https://www.online-literature.com/forums/blog.php?48858-Poems-general-writings-ravings-and-other-things https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?12115-Drunken-rambling Fri, 16 Dec 2011 03:55:00 GMT "I want to know everything.
I want to be everywhere.
I want to **** everyone in the world.
I want to do something that matters."

-Lyric from "I do not want This" By Nine Inch Nails

Have I ever done something that mattered? Have I ever made a hint of difference in anyone's life? Honestly? I ask this to myself daily.

Maybe two weeks ago, a friend of mine asked me, legitimately I might add, if I had a flaw. An odd question coming from her, considering we aren't very close friends by any means. But my first answer was "I write." Not "I drink." Which I do. Not "I'm a jealous prick." Which I am. But "I write." As if it is something to be ashamed of. Perhaps it is. Orwell once said, "Writing is like a bout with an incurable illness. No man would willingly subject himself to it unless driven by some inner demon." There is such beauty in this quote. Writing does not make me happy. It helps organize my thoughts, but in no way does it make me happy. And honestly, I could not tell you what possesses me to do it. Perhaps I think that somewhere deep inside of my mind, there is something worth putting down on paper. Maybe I am just a drunk that likes pouring his thoughts into this clacking machine. You know, Vonnegut made the point that "The four American winners of the Nobel Prize for Literature, Hemmingway, Steinbeck, Faulkner, and Sinclair, were all certifiable alcoholics." There is more harsh truth to this quote. These men, who we idolize as heros in the world of fiction, all suffered the same heroic downfall. Yet I believe there is still beauty. A happy man has little to give to the world. He spreads his joy to others, and this is plenty noble. But I am not interested in noble. I want to find the truth of this world, and no one has seen truth like an intelligent drunk. He was driven to self pity for some reason. He can look out into the world and see nothing but cons, whores, and derelicts. He does not see this thing as the common man.

Of all the things that I am unsure of about myself, I know one sure thing. I am not the common man. Whether it is insanity or something else, I embrace it. I am not the common man, and I am proud.

Perhaps I have done something of worth. I have tried my best to show whoever is interested how I see the world. Maybe I have shed light. If one passage I have written, just one, has ever touched someone. Moved someone, in anyway. Caused anyone to feel something other than apathy. Then yes, I have done something that matters.

All of my insignificant little problems fade away.






Note: I typed this up on my old Smith-Corona in a drunken stupor the other night. ]]> kevinthediltz https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?12115-Drunken-rambling https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?12005-Hello-again Thu, 20 Oct 2011 03:26:56 GMT Hello again, all. Kevinthediltz here. An old user. I have not been on in a long time. And I mean long time. Due to lots of mixed emotions about a... Hello again, all.
Kevinthediltz here. An old user.
I have not been on in a long time. And I mean long time. Due to lots of mixed emotions about a lot of things. And also due to a large lack of writing in the past year. I miss you all! And I really want to use this place like I used to. I want to continue to write like I used to. I suppose we will see how that goes. I hope at least a few of you remember me. And to those of you who I haven't met, hello! I am Kevinthediltz. It is nice to meet you! I suppose that is all for now. I have a few poems stashed in my notebook that I will post at some point. Hope everyone is doing well.

~Kevin ]]> kevinthediltz https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?12005-Hello-again https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?9332-Schneeeeww! Thu, 19 Nov 2009 01:48:28 GMT The mountain opened today.
And god was it fantastic. I had forgotten how much I love to ski. I went up early thinking "I'll just get one or two runs in" I had on my new powder skis because I wanted to try them out even though there was no powder. But I got there early enough that I could put some fresh tracks through the trees. AND I saw my the first kid of the year to get clipped by a crazy. Snowboarder was being cocky and just caught this kid in ski school. Didn't even stop to see if the kid was ok. I have advice: Be you a skier or a boarder that likes to go fast, DON'T DO IT ON THE GREEN RUNS! Don't use ski school kids as a slalom course! Christ!
All in all, good day. :thumbs_up:
Gosh I must be boring. Sorry. :sick: ]]> kevinthediltz https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?9332-Schneeeeww! https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?9288-I-keep-death-prisoner Sun, 15 Nov 2009 09:27:04 GMT Death waits for me at the door. Like looking into a mirror. Skin dripping off bones. I keep it locked away. Boots click on the concrete floor... Death waits for me at the door.
Like looking into a mirror.
Skin dripping off bones.
I keep it locked away.

Boots click on the concrete floor
It paces back and forth in its cell
Beating the walls
Feeding on the dark

Its plea is tempting
Spoken through a crack
"I'm waiting for you
Let me free you from this"

It pants and houls and waits for a fall
Licks the air for blood
Tastes my weakness
Waiting and watching

I give it nothing
I have nothing to give
I keep it prisoner
A trophy in my cellar


(Inspired by a line from "The Collector" by John Fowles) ]]> kevinthediltz https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?9288-I-keep-death-prisoner https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?9133-Holy-crap-its-been-a-while Fri, 23 Oct 2009 01:18:47 GMT HOLY CRAP ITS BEEN A WHILE!
For those of you that don't remember me, I'm kevin. I've been busy and just doing alot of other stuff. I even have that banner at the top of this page that says "Hey kevinthediltz, you haven't posted in a long time. Why not.... blah blah blah. Oh well. Anyway. An update. I'm still at the ranch right now. But soon I'll be moving at bit further up. About 2000 more vertical feet. To winter park. Working an atv plow for the ski resort. I'm pretty excited. Work in the mornings. Ski all afternoon and weekends. I've been writing some but not as much. I'll post them sometime I suppose. Anyway most of you are already going somewhere else and not listening to me anymore. But anyway HELLO AGAIN to anyone that remembers who I am. ]]> kevinthediltz https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?9133-Holy-crap-its-been-a-while https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?8619-Hello-again Sat, 25 Jul 2009 04:39:31 GMT Hey everyone. I know its been a while. I have been very very busy. Well update on the petty stuff. Work is going well. I love my job and if you know... Hey everyone. I know its been a while. I have been very very busy. Well update on the petty stuff. Work is going well. I love my job and if you know me at all you already know that so I won't go into details. :lol: I'm living in a new place this year. They call it the barn apartment. I would call it a penthouse. :lol: No need to remind anyone how rich the guy that owns this ranch is. So its an apartment to his standards; beautiful and amazing. I have one roommate now but when he moves out I am all alone again. Which is good and bad at the same time. I like living alone, but miss people at the same time. Anyway I'll assume that most of you are all falling asleep at this point so I'll quit it now.

In more exciting news, I think that I am in love. If not IN love I am falling. She just makes me smile on a level that I have never seen before. It does get complicated due to many outside things but I'll spare you that sh*tstorm of bore-tastic details. But I think we will get around it and be happy for quite some time. :)

Anyway, thats life for Kevin.

I'm both reading and writing less due to being busy. And maybe this girl has had a bit to do with it. :lol:

I miss you all dearly! And thanks for reading. :) ]]> kevinthediltz https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?8619-Hello-again https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?8372-Not-sure-on-a-title-for-this-one Sun, 14 Jun 2009 18:35:43 GMT I see nothing but hate, Every man is a con Every woman a whore Every child a fiend I am nothing but hate Blacker than the sun A blanket of... I see nothing but hate,
Every man is a con
Every woman a whore
Every child a fiend

I am nothing but hate
Blacker than the sun
A blanket of death over flower fields
A cold blade hidden in warm skin

You will wear a necklace of thin piano wire
You will dance in the desert night, hanging in the air
Flames lick at your feet, two-step dancing feet
I will slit your throat. ]]> kevinthediltz https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?8372-Not-sure-on-a-title-for-this-one https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?8344-There-is-no-faith Mon, 08 Jun 2009 04:40:44 GMT There is no faith
When the sun falls from the sky
There is no church
When it's "children" are screaming

Men praying to the clouds
The sky is all that remains quiet
Flames of hell lick the earth
Only fire will judge the righteous from the damned

There is nothing in this death
Identical to a million others
Skin deep burns,
Paper thin scars

Christ your lord
Has failed his fathers name



I know its been a while since I posted a poem. Ive been busy. Yes a girl is involved. But my life is quite grand. Ive been riding alot and having fun. And this girl.:rolleyes: God this girl. Saying she makes me happy is an understatement. :) ]]> kevinthediltz https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?8344-There-is-no-faith https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?8198-Sparkles-and-blood Tue, 12 May 2009 03:32:47 GMT A beautiful mind Sweet and innocent, Dark and sadistic. Gleaming sparkles Floating in blood. Screams draw me closer The sirens song But no... A beautiful mind
Sweet and innocent,
Dark and sadistic.
Gleaming sparkles
Floating in blood.

Screams draw me closer
The sirens song
But no sharp rock
Can stop this ship
From the deafening call

This is the end
You have captured me now
A prisoner
Forever drowning
In sparkles and blood. ]]> kevinthediltz https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?8198-Sparkles-and-blood https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?8177-The-rebel Sat, 09 May 2009 00:30:03 GMT Rebellion tied naked to a post Screaming hate to the empty heavens, Sharp cracking, Distant cries. This love is a gift Passed from father to... Rebellion tied naked to a post
Screaming hate to the empty heavens,
Sharp cracking,
Distant cries.
This love is a gift
Passed from father to son,
Through the end of a whip.

The cut face turns upward;
Fighting the sharp leather.
"I am the wolf,
By the end of this day
I will be drinking your blood,
And knawing at your flesh.
Your love will not go unpunished." ]]> kevinthediltz https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?8177-The-rebel https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?8170-What-the-hell-John Fri, 08 May 2009 03:41:00 GMT So some of you might know that "East of Eden" is on my summer list of books. I already finished "The Gambler" (amazing by the way, I cant wait to start "The Brothers Karamazov.") So I picked up ol' Steinbeck. I love John, he is a great writer. But I'm about 100 pages into the book and all I can think is "what the hell?" Don't get me wrong, its an amazing book just like the rest of Steinbeck, but really, what the hell? Girls being graphicly whipped? Girls faking rape? Its just... Different. I mean sure, "Of Mice and Men" had a large man accidentally (spelling?) strangling puppies and girls. But whippings of 16 year olds and things like that. Where did this come from? I know that this book is his own family's history and I can already see the similarities to the book of Genisis. But where did all the graphicness come from? I know little about Steinbecks life so please enlighten me on where it all came from. And by the way, I don't dislike the book at all. Its amazing so far. Just really different than what I was expecting with Steinbeck. ]]> kevinthediltz https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?8170-What-the-hell-John https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?8151-The-way-of-my-flesh Wed, 06 May 2009 00:56:48 GMT You are a scar Dwelling deep inside of me Driving me to madness, Driving me to extinction You are a blister on my hand That bursts And... You are a scar
Dwelling deep inside of me
Driving me to madness,
Driving me to extinction

You are a blister on my hand
That bursts
And showers me in red warmth,
Comfort in a cold world

You are a burn
Ever present
To never forget
The hot iron I once adored

You are the way of my flesh
The hate that moves me.
Forever will you be
My love.



Yes I know its been a while but Ive been slacking on my writing. Theres bikes to fix. ]]> kevinthediltz https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?8151-The-way-of-my-flesh https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?8111-Ever-wonder Fri, 01 May 2009 03:11:34 GMT What a riding lawnmower would sound like with strait pipes? Well today I found out. I was helping mike mow the lawns and was riding a little red... What a riding lawnmower would sound like with strait pipes?
Well today I found out.
I was helping mike mow the lawns and was riding a little red riding mower up to the barn (its kinda pointless to put it on the trailer for a 30 second drive) and all of the sudden it sounded like a harly was screaming next to me. I turn around and what do I see? The muffler of the mower staring at me.
It fell off. Not like jiggling around the engine off, O-F-F off. Laying on the ground off.
But I have to say, it sounds pretty cool. Like I said, it sounds like a harley at 70 mph.
But being the machanic that I am, I only got to enjoy the sound for the first half of the day then broke down and welded it back on.

Anywho, thought I would share. ]]> kevinthediltz https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?8111-Ever-wonder https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?8100-Height-of-my-life Wed, 29 Apr 2009 00:56:17 GMT The height of my life And the world falls into pieces An old demon from the ashes arises Drowning me in bloodstained water A knot in the... The height of my life
And the world falls into pieces
An old demon from the ashes arises
Drowning me in bloodstained water

A knot in the stomach
I rip and tear
At my own flesh
To rid of it

A blank stare etched upon a blank face
Scars echo a 6 year weight
Hung from my neck
A noose of wire

I bear the brand of a coward
This coward will dance with feet dangling ]]> kevinthediltz https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?8100-Height-of-my-life https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?8051-Cool-stuff Tue, 21 Apr 2009 02:01:26 GMT So life up here is pretty good still. Its been snowy for a bit but its all melted off which means mud, mud, mud! Which can be fun on spare time but... So life up here is pretty good still. Its been snowy for a bit but its all melted off which means mud, mud, mud! Which can be fun on spare time but its a bother when your working. Trailers slide all over the place and its dirty as hell. Been doing irrigation and stuff like that, which has reminded me how much I HATE beavers. We have had an infestation this spring. They are all over the place. Building dams in spillways and culverts and such. And guess who gets to tear all the dams out? MEEEEEEEE!!!!!! Yippie!!!!!! We try to keep the population in check but there is only so much you can do. I tote around a rifle or shotgun whenever I can. I put a few pellets into one today and one yesterday but trapshot just doesnt do the trick. My hate for beavers is so strong I could shoot the cutest little baby beaver in the mouth and feel nothing. Uhhhh...
Anyway, cool story. I was out cleaning the irrigation screens down by the river. On an atv as usual. Well it was a bit snowy out, and I saw some bear tracks. I was like "cool, bear tracks." So I kept chuggin along by the tracks and sure enough, bear shyt. And I was like "cool, bear ****." So I kept going, and sure enough, theres a deer carcas in the middle of the trail. Freshly dead. I could actually see where it made the kill, where it dragged the carcas to, where it ate it. Then it walked 50 yards or so and swqatted down for a ****. Good stuff.

Oh, and I got a roommate. Hes a cool guy, he rides an old 70's honda crusier and he lets me ride it.

Well anyways, thats my life. :) ]]> kevinthediltz https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?8051-Cool-stuff