https://www.online-literature.com/forums/blog.php?47772-maraki16 The largest classic literature discussion forum on the Internet. Read Write Teach Share. en Fri, 05 Jun 2026 11:24:24 GMT vBulletin 10 https://www.online-literature.com/forums/images/misc/rss.jpg https://www.online-literature.com/forums/blog.php?47772-maraki16 https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?11998-What-she-should-have-told-him-many-months-ago Fri, 14 Oct 2011 13:05:38 GMT '' As my soul wanders through the relics of my broken heart, it's so hard to say I love you no more. For as much as I want to lie to others, one can never lie for long to his own heart.
Having to live without you... I wish I could just forget. I wish it had never happened. If only it was just a dream... a short-lived nightmare. The reality of your absence hurts so much...
My veins have no more blood inside them- I have no life. My heart no longer beats.... my feelings frozen. Without you I am dead.
And everyone around me thinks I am doing alright, that I was just acting dramatic for some time and that the advice I was forced to internalize brought me back to normal. Everyone thinks they've ''fixed me'' for I had been disfunctional for quite some time now, that I had been like a drug-addict who was suffering cause of rehab.
But no one knows what really happens on the inside, for I've never told, and won't allow anyone to see the truth. And what we don't really want to see can more easily stay unseen. After trying a couple of times in vain to show you and everyone else my feelings I decided to silence and give in to the desires of my puppeteers.
The truth is, for the first time in my life I feel so weak and doomed, deprived of my real needs and desires. For the first time in my life, I cannot stand on my own feet, I feel like a dependent, I need others to hold me to make a step, but even so, it feels like I am doing circles, always ending where I began, in the very same spot. My feelings for you are a labyrinth of cactus and dead ends, a giant box with no escape. I desperatey look in the sky for a star to light and guide me to find an escape that leads to a new path, but the sky is black, black like the shirt of the figure that comes every time to my sleep and tries to suffocate me and not let me scream and call for you.
The truth is, I miss a good night's sleep. But most of all, I really miss you... Why doesn't anyone let me say this simple truth out loud? Why does everyone wish for me to be in denial and oppress my true feelings? Why can't anyone understand that when one has his soul torn in two and loses it's one half, he just cannot be ok. I can't pretend it has not happened. The last time I checked you were smiling at me, and now I see your smile only in some old photos. The only thing that reminds me what being happy feels like.
The worst thing is, I still cannot find a reason to hate you for all this pain...'' ]]> maraki16 https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?11998-What-she-should-have-told-him-many-months-ago https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?10553-disappointment Wed, 16 Jun 2010 20:56:39 GMT life is not easy. it has never been, and it will never be. there might be some people whose lives seem perfect, but yet, luck does not always smile... life is not easy. it has never been, and it will never be. there might be some people whose lives seem perfect, but yet, luck does not always smile on them.
by the way, i think i should apologize for my sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo ooo long absence. you've missed me? no, i don't think so, but thank you anyway :P oh yeah baby, the cynic is back! lol!
what is really funny, is the fact that not only life disappoints us, due to the turning points and the ups and downs, the unpredictable aspect, but the people we care about even disappoint us in the most striking, unbelievable ways. friendships can be destroyed, because people don't realize and accept their mistakes, because they don't know how to love someone the way he needs to. love is essential in human relationships, but love is not enough. you also need to express it in the right way. otherwise, it might be taken for jealousy, obsession, empathy, indifference.
loving relationships can also bring you down. some situations are really ridiculous. people nowadays have really lost the meaning of some words and some ideas, which have been the slates on which human relationships have written their long long stories. what does love mean? how easily can you tell someone that you love him and wait for a similar reply? can we give 'love' many different meanings? has it come to mean 'i like you'?or maybe 'i care for you a bit i think'. and how can you measure what you feel in accordance to real love? can you give percentages?
another word. 'care'. what does this word mean? and how can we express our care towards others? does it mean i care for you 24h/day, or can it mean i care for you maybe 20 mins a day, or maybe i care for you when we are together?
'i miss you'. has it become something like the greeting we give to the butcher or the baker when we pass in front of them in the morning, without really wanting to get involved iinto a conversation? or maybe like the mechanical 'bye' we say?
to cut a long story short, what i mean is that i think, i think, that our words should be in some accordance to our actions. and not once or twice a week. everyday of the week.
disappointment. yes, disappointment. life is full of this word. yes, i know, many will hast to say that life is beautiful, 'life is wonderful, alalalalalala, life is wonderful...', but i have got tired of this song anyway so you need not remind me these lyrics. no, life is not wonderful. at least it is not most of the times, and not for everyone. it is full of illusions, which may be considered as some bright moments, but when you remove their light form life, all that is left are the shadows. the shadows of some past dreams, broken and shuttered long ago...
you reach to a point in your life when you say that perhaps things have finally started to get better, and you start to bring back to your memory all these things you had learned about the wheel of fortune and you happily start to whistle, feeling ready to conquer the world again. the world that you had started to conquer, but mother fortune took your strength away, because you were a bad kid :P
imagine whistling and suddenly someone pulling your tongue out, with a barbarous way. you can also add to the picture someone stubbing you on the back and then try to get the feeling. how's life now? wonderful? or maybe, alalaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
disappointment. everyone lets you down, as i had said long ago. even the ones that say they won't hurt you, the truth is they do. i think i should end this chapter here, for if i continue, then i am afraid i might be tempted to open a new one, named 'lies'. and then i am going to be even more cynic.
thank you for listening/reading. goodnight. ]]> maraki16 https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?10553-disappointment https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?8073-the-rain Thu, 23 Apr 2009 18:27:59 GMT i love water. i like it so much. i use to say that whoever 'invented' it must have been really clever:lol: apart from enjoying bathing in the sea and drinking excessive proportions of water(yeah, sorry about that, i know there is not much left on the planet- i think YOU should drink less, for i just can't), i love the rain.
the rain. atoms of H20 dropping from the sky.



have you ever closed your eyes and hear the wishpers of the skies, revealing all their hidden secrets? it's all in the rain. sometimes it is peaceful, like the sky is singing. sometimes heavy, violent. like the clouds are weeping.
one of the best feelings a man can experience is the one which he acknowledges the very moment he closes his eyes and concentrates fully on the rain. when he feels every drop of water in the naked parts of his body, when he focuses on the sound of the rain and tries to count the drops. when he lets his heart surrendered to the rain. too lyrical? maybe. but it really can happen. you can meditate under the rain until feeling you have become one with it.
a drop of water might be nothing on its own. it is produced from the clouds, then it drops and then it disappears- everything done so quickly. but, does it disappear? and if one drop seems worthless, imagine all these drops together. funny how many connotations a drop of rain can have. personally, it reminds me of people. if put all together we are powerful. though our life span may not be too long, we can have a purpose and do something in order not to be completely lost after we pass away. a drop of rain may be absorbed by a plant and literally save it from dying. it can give life. but a flood can destroy everything.

i like to make thoughts like these when it rains. if i have the chance, i just sit somewhere and watch the rain, or close my eyes and watch it with my soul and feel it with all my other senses. it is more visible this way, more magical. it affects me deeply.
and walking in the rain is also a nice experience- not when it rains heavily, but when it gently drops on your face, you know, when it destroys your make-up? yeah! then!:lol: ok, you have to make some sucrifices when you want to enjoy something....nothing in this life comes easy.
the rain.... it helps me clear-up my mmind. like all the problems drop one by one, washed away from me, like the drops that fall one by one on the ground. my problems seem so small then, so temporal. and at the same time, i drem of pleasant things, i make nice- but sometimes melancholic- thoughts. i feel free, like the drops of the rain, though i am anxious of the potential of being force to succumb to my destiny, like every drop of water is destined to fall.
i will push away this thought and start singing in the rain instead;) ]]> maraki16 https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?8073-the-rain https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?7600-i-love-you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!-!!!!!!!! Sat, 28 Feb 2009 19:00:27 GMT so, there are times that i feel like going out and start telling people i love them. isn't it weird? but it is just that i feel i have so much love to give, and moreover, i believe that it is possible to love evryone. evry one can be loved and love someone back. i think i could love every person i meet on the street. if i was given the chance to know them better....i love people!!!!!!!!!!!! so i want to tell you, to all my litnet friends, and especially to some of them- they know who they are i think, or at least, they should- that i love you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!you are all so exciting-not only my 'friends' but everyone in this site, cause you all love literature and philosophy. i love YOU, and YOU, and YOU, and YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ]]> maraki16 https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?7600-i-love-you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!-!!!!!!!! https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?7479-happy-valentine-for-the-singles Sat, 14 Feb 2009 14:19:57 GMT happy valentine's day! i want to give my best wishes to all the couples around the world, even if some claim that they do not celebrate because it is a commercial day. and yes i know that many people say that they do not need a special day in order to celebrate their love, and they are right. but really, who does so? few people remember to express their admiration and their love to the one they love. so this day is good for those who don't exchange cards full of sweet words, poems, declarations of love, teddy-bears, rings, flowers, chocolates or kisses under the light of candles everyday....
today i am really happy, because although i am single, i have three of my best friends who are not. and who are really happy with the one that has stolen their heart- or at least is still trying to still it:lol: what can i say, people don't fall head over heels for someone easily these days:lol: it must be due to the economic crisis- they want to save some feelings for a rainy day perhaps:D and i am also happy for everyone who has found his/her valentine!
but today is not only a celebration for couples....today we celebrate love. we celebrate the best that some people manage to bring out of us. we celebrate the act of being in love...not necessarily with a physical person, but with love itself. because love means life. love is life. and life is the expression of love- something a bit more philosophical i just thought but am not going to analyze here.

and now some piece of advice that i am sure most of you already know but do not really act according to: live for the moment and make some dreams for the future. enjoy the love that you now have. declare your feelings without thinking that you can do it in the future. because future is unpredictable and you might not be given the chance. don't feel vunerable in saying 'i love you'. it is probably one of the few things that can make us feel secure-not just with the person we are with, but with ourselves as well. make relationships that you feel that can have a future. i do not mean marriage. just future. relationships that can make you dream of being together tomorrow, or for ever. because that might mean that the one you have is the one for you. it might mean that you have found someone you can deeply love and thus, become a better person.
be with someone who makes you dream of tomorrow, and live with him like there is no tomorrow. love deeply, cause you deserve to feel your heart beating faster. love deeply cause we all deserve to hear someone's heart beat fast. cause everyone needs and deserves to feel the magic of love surrounding us.

if you love to love, then i certainly love you! and don't forget to send some flowers or a card to your beloved- they will adore you even more. and do not hesitate to express your love to someone that might not even know your existance- but i am sure they do. it is worth a try.

PS: thank you for the poem. it was so lovely. if i knew who you are, i would ask you to make me a marriage proposal:lol::lol::lol: (who are you really? i am SOOOO curious!!!!!!) ]]> maraki16 https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?7479-happy-valentine-for-the-singles https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?7334-so-lonely Fri, 30 Jan 2009 17:22:06 GMT if you have a changeabe mood or frequent moments of blue, you should better not read this. i feel a little depressed these weeks. melancholic. i am... if you have a changeabe mood or frequent moments of blue, you should better not read this.
i feel a little depressed these weeks. melancholic. i am not in a good mood. i don't go out, i don't want to. i stay in my room most of the day. i argue with my parents all the time, don't they see that i am not well? damn, i feel awful! my mother asked me what's wrong with me yesterday, but i did not wish to answer. i just said, several stuff, i do not want to talk about anything. but they don't leave me alone, they yell at me for everything, even for the most unimportant things. they are ready to attack. and so i do the same, cause i got so many nerves and cannot stand their voices.
i feel suffocated by my own self, by my own life. i feel so lonely...the worse thing is that i cannot cry. a tear or two may drop but nothing more, that is all. i want to get relieved from this burden but i can't and i don't even know which is the exact reason for feeling this way.
my only refuge is a pen and a notebook. i try to write and burst into words if you let me say it so, though this is wrong by means of syntax- burst into words does not exist as an expression if i am correct, we don't even use it in greek. but anyway, this is not the point.
i see no light out there anymore. only darkness. and i am so afraid of dark. since i was a kid i couldn't stand it. i feel like my heart is becoming a stone. i feel cold. i feel like i am turning into a breeze or something. i feel empty. yeah, this is the word. empty. with a huge, dark void, full of sorrow in my soul. there is no one out there. and i cannot take anyone's hand, cause i see nobody offering his. my best friend tells me that this is all nonsense, that i should forget about anything because there is no reason to feel like this, and partly, she is right. but i've always been a melancholic person every now and then.
are my dreams ever coming true?- i guess not.
am i going to find the one i am looking for?- probably not.
what am i doing here? what is my purpose? what have i come here for? for nothing? why, i don't like nothing. nothing is an awful word. why doesn't anybody see me? why can't they hear me? why do i feel trapped among ghosts? or am i the ghost? they all seem to understand each other, but they cannot understand me. i don;t understand them. it's like we speak a different language. and the only languages i speak is greek, english and a bit of french. where am i? can't they hear me screaming? why do i only hear the echo of my voice but no answer? what's wrong with me? i don't want to be here!!! i need some help, but everyone seems too busy. maybe they are. it is not their fault anyway. it is me who has the problem.
i should not have been born in this place and at this era. i feel like i stuck out. like i don't belong here. i am different. not special, by no means better than the others, but i am different. i feel like i was not meant to be here. but then where?
what am i doing here? it feels like i was destined to go somewhere but took the wrong bus and the driver can't stop and tell me which bus i need to take in order to reach my destination. like i was travelling and the captain lost the route and we ended up in the wrong port.why am i here? what am i doing? ]]> maraki16 https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?7334-so-lonely https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?7045-A-metaphorical-description-in-greek Sun, 28 Dec 2008 20:38:23 GMT Καθόταν πάντα από τα αριστερά της, γιατί ήθελε να βρίσκεται πιο κοντά στην καρδιά της. Ο άγρυπνος φύλακας, που με περισσή αφοσίωση προστάτευε το πολύτιμο ρουμπίνι των ονείρων του. Η καρδιά της ήταν ό,τι είχε ποθήσει περισσότερο στη ζωή του. Τα χείλη της η πιο δροσερή όαση που συνάντησε ποτέ. Το μεθυστικό της άρωμα τον ταξίδευε στις μαγικές αγορές της Αραβίας. Κανέλλα και μπαχάρια εθιστικά, σαν τον αειθαλή εθισμό του στην αισθησιακή της μυρωδιά.

i know no one will understand this, so i just posted it for libri's shake, although i doubt that he might understand it either....:D specially for you libri. and something tells me i'll have to translate this short description:lol: ]]> maraki16 https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?7045-A-metaphorical-description-in-greek https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?6759-love Tue, 11 Nov 2008 18:59:49 GMT why do you want to know what love is, when you never left anyone to love you? why do you want to know what love is, when you never felt like... why do you want to know what love is,
when you never left anyone to love you?

why do you want to know what love is,
when you never felt like giving love to anyone?

love was what i felt when i saw you
but you didn't see me.
love was what i told you,
but you didn't listen.
love was when i loved you,
but you didn't love me.

why do you want to know what love is,
when you never took care of my love?
when you never cared about my broken heart?
when i ssaid i loved you
you told me not to think of love.
why do you ask me if i still loved you,
since you still haven't loved me?

love is said to be a game for two.
but you are standing all alone now.
cause i am far away.
you will be on your own now
cause i am never coming back

if you want to know what love is,
you gotta search deep into your heart.
it's the feeling that you never felt
and the one you are never going to feel.
cause you never really wanted to know
what love is. ]]> maraki16 https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?6759-love https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?6758-a-desparate-entreaty Tue, 11 Nov 2008 16:46:14 GMT give me a reason to live today and i shall die a thousand times tomorrow. give me a reason to open my wings and fly. a reason to look at people... give me a reason to live today
and i shall die a thousand times tomorrow.
give me a reason to open my wings and fly.
a reason to look at people straight into the eyes.
tell me i shall live without being hurt.
that the sun of this blue sky will not blind me.
that the words of all these people won't seem cold.
that their kiss and their caress will not kill me.
their hugs are cold, their kiss is bitter.
their smiles disgust me.
they repulse me or even scare me
they are as dark as a dive
envious like demons.
i hate them and qm scared of them.
i touch them and they pull me under
to the dungeons of the misery
and i get lost in the clamour of the Silence
in despair of finding a ray of light ]]> maraki16 https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?6758-a-desparate-entreaty https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?6757-freedom Tue, 11 Nov 2008 16:26:59 GMT the wings of love i will put on and rise up. the kingdom of the skies till i find. and i shall take a place up there among the free for freedom... the wings of love i will put on
and rise up.
the kingdom of the skies till i find.
and i shall take a place up there
among the free
for freedom had always been a part
of me. ]]> maraki16 https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?6757-freedom https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?6683-jokes!(sorry-to-read-this-if-you-are-a-man!) Wed, 29 Oct 2008 13:01:12 GMT well, i just received a mail from a good friend of mine, with some jokes, entitled: ways to reject men you don't like. i have translated them for you, i think they are really nice!

1.man: hey doll, where have you been all of my life?
woman: i was hiding...from you!

2.man: i am aphotographer. i am looking for a face just like yours!
woman: i am a plastic surgeon. i am also looking for a face just like yours.

3.man: would you like to go out with me on saturday?
woman: i am sorry. i am going to have a headache on saturday.

4.man: come on, don't be shy! ask me to go out with you!
woman: of course. go out!!!

5.man: i think i could make you really happy...
woman: why, are you leaving?

6.man: what would you answer if i asked you to marry me?
woman: nothing. i cannot speak and laugh at the same time!

7.man: could you give me your name please?
woman: why, don't you have one of your own?

8. man: would you like us to watch a movie?
woman: no. i've watched them all.

9.man: i think i've seen you somewhere once before!
woman: indeed you have. i never make the same mistakes twice!

10.man: is the seat next to you free?
woman: yes. and mine is going to be too if you seat there.

11.man: your body is like a church!
woman: sorry, no church service today.

12.man: if i had the chance to see you naked, i would die a happy man.
woman: if i saw you naked, i would die from laughter!
13.man: a lot of heads must turn towards you at the sight of your face!
woman: a lot of stomachs should turn at the sight of yours!


i hope that men with a good sense of humour will also appreciate this!:lol::lol::lol: ]]> maraki16 https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?6683-jokes!(sorry-to-read-this-if-you-are-a-man!) https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?6681-do-soul-mates-exist Wed, 29 Oct 2008 07:27:10 GMT from time to time, more or less we have all heard a lot about soul-mates. about the famous alter-ego. the mirroring of ourselves in the face of... from time to time, more or less we have all heard a lot about soul-mates. about the famous alter-ego. the mirroring of ourselves in the face of someone else. many have tried to find theirs. i do not know whereas you believe in it or consider it to be a myth, a big lie created by the romantics to remind to the broken-hearted that there will always be a potential to find the ultimate lover. personally, i have dreamed of the white-knight, yes, of the fair prince riding a nice horse, a great deal. though growing older i limited my imagination to a guy wearing jeands and riding a dusty car- i don't like riding motorbikes. i finally understood that i live in a city and not in a fairytail i guess. but honestly, i do not think that i might have a lot of chances to find him.
oh, and you what's the worse part of the story? when you kiss the prince, then kiss him again and again, and the sneaky creature becomes a frog after having stolen too many kisses! and the nightmare can be endless... alternative end for the story: after yuo have given many many kisses to that prince without having taken notice of any suspicious changes in his height( you can still kiss him without being forced to kneel or hold him in your hand), colour( no, he has not become a huge fan of green yet), or speech(well, even if there was a change in his speech, if love can be blind, it could also be deaf right?), you live happily ever after. what? not in this alternative! in this story, you realise after some time that you have found the wrong prince! imagine having met a prince in really high spirits and that you were in a desperate need of a prince because of the season(spring and summer can be really tricky indeed!) or i don't know what else, and after some time you realise he is not the prince of south let's say, but the prince of north. what are you doing then? you tell me.
to get a little more serious though, i'll try to expose my more mature approach to this controversial issue(even more controversial than the one considering the existence of gay penguins-ok, i've nearly found the mature one; i think it ir right...here.)
so, how do we consider our soul-mate to be like? should he be someone as beautiful internally as externally as we'd wish him to? is it really possible to find someone that can fully live up to our expectations? hey, don't wait for answers here! if i had them, i would not bother writing this thing, i would be out tracing my precious!
and supposely soul-mates really exist. does every single person has one? what if some people don't? and is it possible for alter-egos to exist? i mean, for more than one soul-mate for each one of us? and are we bound to meet at least one of them during our life? and if yes, how are we going to recognize him? are we destined with our alter-ego for ever once we've found him, or is it possible to break-up? but can we really move on after losing our soul-mate? i will not bother with the potential of three alter-egos existing and only two of them getting together. poor third one!love is made just for two!
so, is it possible to meet our soul-mate? what if he lives far away, in another country? and what if he has another relationship or family? or if he is much older or younger than us and we are not comfortable with that? or if he belongs to the same sex and we are not gay and vice versa? what happens if one of the two dies before they even meet? what if we spend the whole of our lives near each other and never get the chance to see one another? moreover, are soul-mates bound to be lovers? or can they be inlolved in some other kind of relationship? friendship, blood-relation etc? what if our soul-mate is a pet? anorthodox views you think? well, never claimed to be right!
so, honestly, what do you think? should i give up hope and give the frog a chance evn if i know that he won't become a prince? or at least a human-being?
yours,
mary ]]> maraki16 https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?6681-do-soul-mates-exist https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?6669-drawning Mon, 27 Oct 2008 16:59:09 GMT i'm sitting by the waves
and listen to the sea
i feel the breeze on my face
that sweeps away my tears.
i feel surrendered to my fate
my destiny calls my name
i can hear it coming through the bottoms of the wild sea.
i get up, i walk towards the voice
the water is cold, the sea starts to roar
i feel i am absorbed, i feel the ground no more.
another voice tells me to stop
but there is time for that no more.
i feel drawned in the water
i watch a light coming through
and feel the cold no more. ]]> maraki16 https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?6669-drawning https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?6646-how-do-you-face-death Fri, 24 Oct 2008 19:07:46 GMT i have been thinking about this for the past months, and it was partly a reason for my long absence from litnet. not due to my toughts, but due to an... i have been thinking about this for the past months, and it was partly a reason for my long absence from litnet. not due to my toughts, but due to an impending death. a really close person is dying from cancer. my grandma.as long as i can remember myself, this person lived in the next-door appartment.for the past 19 years i had been seeing her every day. how am i going to accept her absence when she is going to die?
i know that it is natural for people to die;it is part of the natural circle of life. but i had never faced a death of such a beloved person before. i have never even been to a funeral. i know that it would be better for her to die, since this would release her from her sufferings and she would not hurt her dignity anymore, something she had always been regarding as her priority in her life:to maintain her dignity. one thing that hurts, apart from the fact that i am going to lose her, is that i think that i am selfish.yes, selfish. because i do not want her to die because that would make me sad and i do not know how am i possibly going to move on. i think of my own unhappiness instead of her own relief. and that is something that makes me really mad.
i know that i have to accept that everyone i love is going to die some day.and being an only child makes you face things and be strong, because you know that it is just the three of you:mum, dad and you and if they die you have no brothers or sisters and you have to survive on your own. i mean, everyone feels that at some point of his life, but an only child usually has to realise that sooner than others.
i am trying to accept that, and on a theoritical part i have managed to do so. but what still goes round my mind and terrifies me, is that i do not know how i am going to react at that moment, and how i am going to move forward after that. i think that it is going to be really hard. and i am afraid that as a reaction to that, i might not actually let myself feel the grief and keep it inside, and they have told me that it is better for someone's psychological health to 'live' the death of a beloved when it happens, and not afterwards.
and one more thing: i do not want to forget that person although its remembrance might be painful. it's not that i have the best memories that a grandchild could have of his grandma, but i nevertheless love her.
well, it is kind of a relief to share your feelings with strangers sometimes, isn't it? ]]> maraki16 https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?6646-how-do-you-face-death https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?6640-the-whirl-of-passion Thu, 23 Oct 2008 18:57:12 GMT you suddenly appeared before me like a ghost from the past that jumped up from the darkest sides of my mind to lead me to a secret chamber with... you suddenly appeared before me
like a ghost from the past
that jumped up from the darkest sides of my mind
to lead me to a secret chamber
with thousands of drivels hidden under the sheets
to get lost into the whirl of passion,
into the whirlwind of the silence of your blazing eyes
while the tuning of the violins was heard
like mystic melodies,
presages of the awakening of our hidden selves
and the light of the white candles was pulling me
not towards an exit,
but to my own dark dungeons

*something i wrote some time ago and decided to render into english. still, i think the original sounds much better, though none of the two versions can be regarded as a poem. ]]> maraki16 https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?6640-the-whirl-of-passion