<![CDATA[Literature Network Forums - Blogs - andave's place by andave_ya]]> https://www.online-literature.com/forums/blog.php?26533-andave-s-place The largest classic literature discussion forum on the Internet. Read Write Teach Share. en Thu, 04 Jun 2026 14:54:00 GMT vBulletin 10 https://www.online-literature.com/forums/images/misc/rss.jpg <![CDATA[Literature Network Forums - Blogs - andave's place by andave_ya]]> https://www.online-literature.com/forums/blog.php?26533-andave-s-place Something (attempting to be) Profound. For Virgil :D https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?11717-Something-(attempting-to-be)-Profound-For-Virgil-D Wed, 08 Jun 2011 16:55:59 GMT In many of his books, the famous Russian novelist Fyodor Dostoevsky lays out, in fiction, ideas that he has struggled through and resolved. In The... In many of his books, the famous Russian novelist Fyodor Dostoevsky lays out, in fiction, ideas that he has struggled through and resolved. In The Brothers Karamazov, his classic novel of ideas, he boldly explores several philosophical issues by creating a dialogue between each side. Especially in books V and VI, he deals with the question of what it means to love humanity by a dialogue between Ivan and Alyosha. In the two chapters, two understandings of both love and humility and their interactions with evil are presented in comprehensive worldviews – first in Ivan's intellectual humanism, then in Alyosha's deep orthodoxy. From the two worldviews a number of questions stem. Does one love humanity objectively or subjectively? Does one love humanity or the God behind humanity? Both men answer differently, and both men's stories end very differently and with very different results. This paper, after examining both worldviews, demonstrates that Ivan’s worldview breaks down because he tries to understand humanity from outside itself, whereas Alyosha’s worldview is victorious because he understands humanity from within itself.

Alyosha, as a devout monk, starts with an all-encompassing definition of love, based on Christ. “Love a man even in his sin, for that is the semblance of Divine Love and is the highest love on earth. Love all God's creation, the whole and every grain of sand in it,” said Father Zossima, Alyosha's beloved spiritual leader and the source of most of the religious themes in the book.1 Alyosha, responding to Ivan's passionate declaration that he loves life, tells Ivan to “love life above everything in the world,” because when a man loves life more than its meaning, he will understand what it means.2

Because of his perspective, Ivan's philosophy is almost diametrically opposed to Zossima's. As a philosophical skeptic, Ivan cannot accept Zossima's worldview because Ivan tries to look at humanity objectively. By looking at humanity from the outside, however, the only thing he is able to see is that there is more evil than good in humanity. Not surprisingly, his worldview turns out to be ultimately self-defeating. Ivan finds that he really is a “young and fresh and nice boy, green in fact!” despite all his attempts to be a rational young philosophe.3 After being scorned by the woman he loves, Ivan realizes that even if he is “struck by every horror of man's disillusionment,” he would still want to live life to the fullest!4 He cannot even manage to consistently despise humanity. Despite his atheistic intellectualism, he “love[s] the sticky little leaves as they open in spring. I love the blue sky, I love some people[...]I love some great deeds done by men, though I've long ceased perhaps to have faith in them[...]”5 Love, he realizes, is not a matter of intellect or logic, but what he calls “loving with one's inside, with one's stomach.”6 He considers this helpless love of life illogical, and yet he loves it in spite of himself.7 Ivan Karamazov is a full-fledged stormy Romantic. He accepts God, but cannot bring himself to accept God's world, even though he knows it exists.8 Like a good Romantic, he loves humanity as an abstract but not as the physical, real man living next door. “It's just one's neighbours, to my mind, that one can't love, though one might love those at a distance,” he confesses to Alyosha.9

But Ivan does not stop there. He discusses his worldview further in his prose poem “The Grand Inquisitor,” a dramatic parable set in the time of the Spanish Great Inquisition, where Christ comes again to earth. All humanity recognizes Him, and He begins working miracles when the Grand Inquisitor appears and sternly carries Him off for questioning. He asks Him: have You come to hinder us from doing Your work, when we have finally corrected Your mistakes?10 When Christ is silent, the Grand Inquisitor proceeds to tell Him that His error was in giving mankind too much freedom, instead of heeding the words of Satan when he tempted Christ in the desert. He continues, saying that all the unsolved historical contradictions of human nature are found in the three things Christ rejected during His temptation.11 In the name of true freedom, Christ refused to use miracle, mystery, and authority both to subdue man and to make him happy.12 The Grand Inquisitor admits that man needs more than bread to live for, but that man would prefer “peace and even death, to the freedom of choice in the knowledge of good and evil.”13 By refusing Satan's counsel, he says, Christ refused to satisfy the sum of man's desires: “some one to worship, some one to keep his conscience, and some means of [...]universal unity.”14 So in a move that is both touching and horrifying at once, the Grand Inquisitor reveals that for the last eight centuries he and the church have been working with Satan, all in the name of making a stupid, unlovable, ignoble humanity happy in the present, even if that means leading them merrily to destruction in the afterlife.15 Christ's response is silence – and a smile and kiss for the old man before He leaves.

At least one chief source of the Grand Inquisitor's ire toward Christ is, ironically, a major source of Alyosha's love for Christ: Christ's Incarnation. Redemption was accomplished by God come to the world in the form of a man, emptied of glory, who experienced the life of a perfect human being before being crucified, rising from the dead, and ascending to heaven.16 That Christ was Incarnate implies that God values humanity, crass and unenlightened as the Grand Inquisitor thinks it. The Grand Inquisitor wants to transcend pathetic humanity to become the Savior of humanity himself. In a twisted interpretation of Philippians 2:5-11, he wants to be equal with God, but retain and increase his glory as a man. He is attempting to exalt himself above God by correcting His work.17 For the Grand Inquisitor, “loving humanity” means taking away man's freedom because man does not want it and cannot handle it, not even for the sake of his conscience and freedom.18 For Christ, “loving humanity” means the doctrines of redemption, justification, and sanctification. Although the Grand Inquisitor does not love humankind the way Alyosha does, Ivan says that the Grand Inquisitor had an incurable love of humanity. His way of showing love for humanity, however, was in giving them finite happiness, instead of the long-term goal of reaching the perfection and freedom that comes from Christ.19

The fundamental difference between Ivan and Alyosha is that Ivan withdraws himself from the world and judges man from the outside. Alyosha, on the other hand, loves humanity from within itself; he loves it as a sinner and a man and part of a whole. By virtue of being finite, rather than divine, Ivan is unable to see beyond the flaws, and does not dare love the filthiness he sees because the paradox between good and evil is an unbridgeable gulf to him. Ivan cannot love humanity for its cruelty and ugliness – but is unable to forget that he is not only a man but also a base Karamazov. So for him the rule of life is: Anything is permissible.20 Man is a savage, vicious beast; in fact, he says, the marvelous thing “is not that God should really exist; the marvel is that such an idea, the idea of the necessity of God could enter the head of such a savage, vicious beast as man. So holy it is, so touching, so wise and so great a credit it does man.”21 Yet when he brings God to the problem of evil he recoils. In his conversation with Alyosha, Ivan lays out an intensely painful series of stories of child cruelty that he has collected and asks Alyosha: “Can you admit the idea that men for whom you are building [a fabric of human destiny with the object of making men happy] would agree to accept their happiness on the foundation of the unexpiated blood of a little victim?”22 Hence the reason Ivan attempts to honorably “return the ticket” to God: Justice is still waiting to be meted out.23

Ivan thinks the problem of theodicy is insurmountable, which leads him to despair and to believe that everything is lawful. However, Zossima and Alyosha do not make the same mistake that Ivan does. They do not impose human order on God. They are content to have faith that the problem of evil is a mystery to them, but not to God. Ivan acknowledges that because God created the world in terms of Euclidean geometry Ivan can never expect to understand God, but he uses that as justification to think in purely finite terms.24 Because he creates this obstacle for himself, Ivan cannot grasp the implications of Christ's love. “To my thinking,” he says, “Christ-like love for men is a miracle impossible on earth. He was God. But we are not gods.”25 He is correct in saying that man is not infinite, but he does not realize that God, because of the Incarnation, does know – exactly and wholly – what being human means. Christ loves humankind in spite of its sins. Take, for example, the end of “The Grand Inquisitor.” It ends with Christ lovingly kissing the old man on his lips and leaving with his permission – leaving with Philippians 2:5-11 still very much true, despite the Grand Inquisitor's attempt to place human constructs on God. His final message to the Grand Inquisitor was of boundless love and mercy, a chance to change and a promise that at the right time all wrongs will be righted, despite the old man's painfully human propensities. This is the message Zossima claims – that through unlimited oceans of love the world will be saved.26

Ivan Karamazov despises humanity because he does not know its foundation, which is God. Ivan is repulsed by humankind because he is ultimately just a man himself, and a Karamazov, and worse, a hopeless one. Smerdyakov's crude attempt to become Ivan's equal by killing Fyodor Karamazov shows Ivan the logical conclusion of his philosophy – that because everything is lawful, Smerdyakov could construe Ivan's unthinking actions as permission to murder his father.27 It is logical, then, for Ivan to want humankind to be stupid, even if it is unlovable. He says that “Intelligence is a knave, but stupidity is honest and straightforward.”28 Expanding on the same point, the Grand Inquisitor tells Christ, “By showing [man] so much respect, Thou didst, as it were, cease to feel for him, for Thou didst ask far too much from him!”29 It would have been more loving, he says, to have asked less of man, and to have freed him from the burden of total freedom of choice in the question of good and evil.30 To tell the truth, the Grand Inquisitor is right in his portrayal of humanity – if and only if humanity is meant to be understood apart from Christ.

Zossima does not think humanity is perfect or perfectible apart from Christ. He and Alyosha understand Ivan's dilemma, but respond to it with acceptance. They do not ignore sin, but approach it as sinners themselves. As Zossima says, “Remember particularly that you cannot be a judge of any one. For no one can judge a criminal, until he recognizes that he is just such a criminal as the man standing before him, and that he is perhaps more than all men to blame for that crime.”31 Alyosha does not attempt to deny that he has a streak of Karamazov sensuality.32 Alyosha chronicled Zossima's tales of duels and dissipation before Zossima became a monk.33 Nevertheless, Zossima invites the monks to cover it with love. “If you can take upon yourself the crime of the criminal your heart is judging, take it at once, suffer for him yourself, and let him go without reproach,” says Zossima.34 He is willing to accept the mysterious aspects arising from Christianity, and feels no compunction about it (or about anything else) being beyond his grasp. Using Job, Zossima explains that the actions of God, though for a purpose, are not necessarily understandable by human reasoning. “How could God give up the most loved of His saints for the diversion of the devil[...]and for no object except to boast to the devil?[...]But the greatness of it lies just in the fact that it is a mystery – that the passing earthly show and the eternal verity are brought together in it,” he says.35 The reason Zossima and Alyosha willingly accept the mystery is because they are not, like Ivan, imprisoned in solipsism but are capable of real change. “You have forgotten Him, and on Him is built the edifice, and it is to Him they cry aloud, 'Thou art just, O Lord, for Thy ways are revealed!'” says Alyosha to Ivan.36 Christ kisses the Grand Inquisitor at the end of the story because He is the foundation and the chief cornerstone of sanctified humanity, so He is the only one who can be infinitely merciful and loving. He is giving the Grand Inquisitor the gift of time to choose whose work the man is really doing. Christ's death and resurrection gives man what the Grand Inquisitor says man must have more than anything: something to live for.37 Christ by His sacrifice leads men to freedom, and because of His sacrifice men can be free to recognize what Christians call the imago Dei – the image of God in man. That image is what lifts man and makes him noble, in spite of his sins.

Unfortunately, the idea of the imago Dei and our understanding of Christ's sacrifice do not solve the problem of evil the way Ivan desires it to be. by our understanding of Christ's sacrifice. The imago Dei does, however, undergird the Christian understanding of both physical man and sin. According to Philippians 2:5-11, Christ valued humankind, as depraved as it is, so highly He came in the form of a man, emptied of glory, to save it. Christ's intervention, contrary to the Grand Inquisitor, was not meddling but stemmed out of His nature, out of which also was created the world and all the rules (both moral and, to use Ivan's own word, Euclidian), governing it. Christ's sacrifice on the Cross cannot negate those principles written into the fabric of reality. Ivan could not let himself believe in God because he did not think justice was answered.38 But he was incapable of understanding that he had perfect justice in the body and blood of Christ. If there was some way to impose Euclidian constructs on abstract philosophies, Ivan would discover that not only justice but perfect justice was perfectly administered.

The final results are hope and faith versus unbelief and despair. At the end of the book, Ivan lies ill and unconscious, and Dostoevsky does not reveal whether or not the man survives. The complete viciousness of Ivan's worldview has been revealed to him in the person of Smerdyakov, but Ivan is still tied to his philosophy that “everything is lawful” because he sees no way out. Christ is still not real to Ivan, although the Devil is. Even Ivan's own inconsistency works against him. Despite his horror at humanity and his established belief that Dmitri killed the elder Karamazov, he makes plans to help Mitya escape, and he loves Katerina Ivanovna more passionately than ever. He wants to be part of humanity, but he thinks he must chose either his conscience or his humanity. He does not realize that it is his conscience, flawed and imperfect as it is, tied to Christ, that makes him human. Alyosha has pity on Ivan, and watches over him as he lies ill, and sees that he is ill because of “'The anguish of a proud determination. An earnest conscience!'' God, in Whom he disbelieved, and His truth were gaining mastery over his heart, which still refused to submit.”39 Although Alyosha acknowledges that Ivan might very well be lost, he prays for him and has faith that Ivan will understand the supra-rationality that God is showing him.40 Ivan, it seems, must be driven to Christ by sorest trials to realize that here is a happy, logical, and just reality in Christ and His nature, rather than the collapse into self that inevitably follows a philosophy such as Ivan's.

The Bible never promises that the truth will be easy; Ivan Karamazov drank the dregs of the cup of that difficult truth. It is still open-ended: does he even survive? Is he redeemed? His nihilistic philosophy, with Smerdyakov as protege, drove him to a breakdown. Does he give it up? It is hard to tell, but Zossima and Alyosha answer his dilemma with love, both in philosophy and in action. They do not try to solve the problem of cruelty but are satisfied that their duty is to love humanity with a Christ-like love, and that they can love because Christ is the foundation of that love. They love humanity as men, not as gods themselves, and they love humankind because God created it and gave it meaning. Creation came out of God's nature, and it is still perfect: Love covers a multitude of sins.41 ]]> andave_ya https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?11717-Something-(attempting-to-be)-Profound-For-Virgil-D Am I back? Maybe. This is mostly about Harry Potter, btw. https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?11706-Am-I-back-Maybe-This-is-mostly-about-Harry-Potter-btw Sat, 04 Jun 2011 18:11:28 GMT I turned twenty a little over a month ago. I think twenty DOES feel different from the teenage years, although that's probably psychological. However, I do think I turned into an adult somewhere in the past school year. The change isn't really earth-shattering or radical or anything, but I like it.

Heh. I was praying and thinking this morning and realized I wanted to blog but somehow fell out of the mood. I wanted to talk about how I've changed, what I've learned about myself over the past year at college, how the first week of my summer job went, what I've been reading, etc., but everything I've written so far has sounded incredibly self-centered. I suppose that's the prerogative of blogging, but I don't want to write something that I'll read in twenty years and think, "Goodness, what an obnoxious brat I was!" Or at least, I don't want to make myself sound any brattier than I already am :P.

So where to begin? Well, the quiet Don is still flowing, although at a much softer speed than it had been during school. Everyone freshman year warned me that sophomore year will probably be my hardest year. That's probably true, but not in the way I thought it would be. Every semester has indeed been increasingly more academically difficult but less emotionally so. Last semester was crazy - seventeen credits (two of which were separate internship credits), 10+ hours of work a week, and a couple extracurriculars. I got an average of six hours sleep a night.
Aaaaaaaaaand, I learned that loads of pressure does wonders for my GPA. Isn't that obnoxious? I suppose if I ever want a 4.0 again I shall have to kill myself :P

So here I sit on June 4, 2011, at 1:13 PM, in Virginia at school, eating a sandwich of very crumbly and very delicious cheese and roast beef on stale bread, listening to whatever my ipod shuffles, and feeling rather expansive. I am very blessed. I have a full-time summer job and, although I'm clear over on the other side of the country, I get to see my family on Skype. Amazing thing, Skype. Last night my sister and I watched an episode of Doctor Who, one of our favorite shows, together through it. We muted Skype, put up chat and video, and would chat comments back and forth to each other. We've called each other on it every night since the day after I got here to start my job at HSLDA.

Anyways. I went to the library after work yesterday to chat with Mrs. Pensgard and get some books to read, and they're lurking in the back of my mind calling my name. I started one last night that I suppose I shall have to finish, although I don't really want to. It's the last Harry Potter. I started reading the series summer before last, I think, and I'm finally down to the last one. Boring, mediocre series -- I don't see what all the fuss is about.

There is a clear enough demarcation between good and bad; Christians don't have to be worried about that. I forget where I read it, but someone had said that what was bad about it is that it taught kids that matter can be changed by magic. So what? What're the philosophical implications of that? In fact, I think that can even be a good perception to have - depending on one's understanding of magic. Three or four hundred years ago, the breakthroughs science has reached today would seem to be magic - would CHANGE MATTER. If people didn't think that matter could serve a purpose to create something different or something previous generations hadn't imagined, isn't that a bad thing? Take it a step further: what about creation ex nihilo? Or even make it personal: when we cook or bake, aren't we changing the molecular structure of food? That's one of my favorite things about baking - that grainy-looking goop turns into delicious things with totally different color, texture, smell, taste, etc.

Haha, I was supposed to be explaining why it's mediocre. I think it fails as good fantasy because it doesn't have something transcendent it is fighting for. Let me explain. Harry is fighting Voldemort not primarily because Voldemort is bad, but because Voldemort killed his parents and wants to kill him. Perhaps that's a minor quibble, but I'm not convinced that, had Harry's parents not died, Harry would still have gone on the quest for the Horcruxes (which Rowling took an unforgivably long time to get to, anyway) with the same sort of passion. That is, if anyone can call his bratty tragic-hero-with-an-inflated-ego-bigger-than-God's-complex a proper drive to pursue the good. Granted, that could still change before I finish book 7 (I'm 450 pages in) but considering how massive the series is, it'd be incredibly difficult to do without pulling some incredible miracle out of Voldemort's nonexistent nose.

When I think of fantasy, I think of pursuing a transcendent good. That's why I love Lord of the Rings so very much - there are men of high values like courage, integrity, honor, loyalty and love, who have an appreciation for the old fading or forgotten beauty - who have saudade; who fight for the sake of conquering evil, for the sake of gaining freedom, for the sake of being free from fear, free to love, free to live life with joy and happiness. Stories like that inspire people to pursue transcendent things. Harry Potter, despite the magic, is mundane. It doesn't have overarching themes that pull the reader in and make him part of the story (well, I guess I shouldn't generalize like that. It certainly does not pull me in, at any rate.) I don't see virtues I want to emulate in Harry Potter; in fact, reading Harry Potter makes me very happy I have a mother who is blunt in telling me what's wrong with me (basically, being willing to slap me upside the head when I start pulling out angsty-ness like dear old Harry's.) It's a book written for the modern conception of teenagers, the ones who want excitement without being challenged to shape up.

That's not to say Rowling doesn't try - she pulls that whole love thing from Dumbledore in book 5 or 6, I can't remember which. There's the whole fairness to the Muggles thing as well. But how well are these pulled off? Harry the Hero is so thickheaded he doesn't understand the overwhelming love and loyalty Ron and Hermione show him in coming with him, AND he's stupid enough to push them away when he needs them the most? (cf: Ron leaving in book 7.) How could Harry allow Ron and Hermione to walk into danger with him but let Ginny stay? (Though of course she, like a good little Potterling, carries on the resistance at the home front.) Harry is so wrapped up in his own heroism and his own sufferings it IS a wonder he manages to get that far. I'm with Snape on Harry's character. And certainly, without Ron and Hermione Harry would've failed a long time ago. And about the Muggles - Hermione wipes her own parents minds, "out of love." In my humble opinion, that makes Muggles look as stupid as Voldemort thinks they are. Are there any Muggles in the story arc that are given the spotlight as good people worth saving?? Not even the woman Harry and the others save, in Book 7, looks worth saving. Rowling gives readers no reason to really pity the Muggles and want Harry to save them.

Final opinion: mediocre. Three stars. Would have been four stars if the series had been three books instead of seven. Humph.

Lolz. This post makes me laugh. It's right on the edge of ranting and raving :P. I think next time I shall have to talk about Ayn Rand.

P.S. If my opinion about HP changes between now and the end of the book, I shall be sure to let you know. ]]> andave_ya https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?11706-Am-I-back-Maybe-This-is-mostly-about-Harry-Potter-btw <![CDATA[I'm in a writery mood today]]> https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?11188-I-m-in-a-writery-mood-today Sun, 21 Nov 2010 04:32:36 GMT Have you ever remembered a dream that you had, and then it won't leave you the rest of the day?

"I dreamed that I carried someone,
But I forgot I dreamed until the jolt of remembered memory stole my breath away, like the silence of snowfall.
There was a man and he leaned on me. I
still feel him in my arms.
And all today the phantom has remained by my side
like the rose upon the rood of time.
I offer this poem as homage - and
to let him know, futurephantom, that when he needs me, I'll be here." ]]> andave_ya https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?11188-I-m-in-a-writery-mood-today Old Devil Rain https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?11046-Old-Devil-Rain Thu, 30 Sep 2010 12:51:06 GMT Sigh.
Step outside and blow a raspberry
under my umbrella.
Trudge all the way to Founders'
and shake myself like a dog because
my umbrella's too cheap.
Sit in class, miffed at needing artificial light at 12:20 PM.
Class over. Outside, and sigh again.
No.
STOP.
Huff another sigh, and close my umbrella.
"Look here, you!" Fist shaking at the sky.
"You're dismal and depressing and make me miserable.
You got the better of me this time and you will again
BUT
not for long because
God is coming soon and all depressing things shall be banished--
Although I wouldn't mind a kind, gentlemanly rain just for those who like it, poor things.
There.
Take that,
Old Devin Rain! ]]> andave_ya https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?11046-Old-Devil-Rain Frankenstein https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?11029-Frankenstein Mon, 27 Sep 2010 03:17:18 GMT Just curious...what do you think about him? I'm reading him for Western Lit II currently, and writing a paper on it. I read it over the summer and enjoyed it, but now upon rereading...I think Victor Frankenstein is a melodramatic jerk. ]]> andave_ya https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?11029-Frankenstein quick update https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?10918-quick-update Fri, 27 Aug 2010 02:50:40 GMT I just wanted to take a break from Latin and let you guys know what's going on with me.

I'm back at school, entirely by God's grace! We had a bad scare that I had a brain cyst but thankfully it was all a hullaballoo over the equivalent of a wrinkle. Nothing wrong with me.

So of course, I love school. This semester is going to be marvelous. Marvelous and maddening. Here's what's on the table for this semester.

15 credits worth of difficult classes: Principles of Biblical Reasoning (apologetics and AMAZING. My professor belongs in a book.), Freedom's Foundations I (political theory), Constitutional Law, Latin I, and Western Literature II.

On top of that, a 1 credit internship for Lamplighter Ministries, which re-publishes rare Christian books from the 1600s-1800s.

On top of that, helping out as a junior editor for Scratch, the school's literary journal.

On top of that, (although not for certain) a 10-15 hour job.

On top of that, I've an audition for chapel guild tomorrow and I'm almost certain I'll get in.

And finally, depending on how my schedule looks after that, volunteering at ESL childcare for 3 hours once a week.

On top of homework/tests/papers and memorizing Latin.

:banana:

I'm so excited. ]]> andave_ya https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?10918-quick-update Atlas Shrugged and other tales https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?10727-Atlas-Shrugged-and-other-tales Sun, 18 Jul 2010 03:09:39 GMT I kind of miss blogging. I'm going to try to be more consistent from now on (watch, it'll be forever before I post again :P)

Before I say anything, though, I wanted to say major congratulations to Virgil, Puss, and little baby Matthew. Blessings to all of you! You are constantly in my prayers and I'm so excited for you.

Also, major congratulations to Ruth for getting a job! I'm so happy for you!

So this has got to be the laziest summer I've had in a looong time, and, I think it'll be the last one I can spend lazing around. Next summer, Lord willing, I'll find a job. If tuition at PHC keeps going up, I'm going to reaaaally need it. But God is good.

Basically all I've done is read, play piano, and write (although not too much writing, because my laptop is, ahem, undergoing revolutions :P). Out of the twelve books I have to read for Western Lit II next semester, I've read nine and have no desire to read the other three. Two of them (Gulliver's Travels and Faust) I've already read, and after looking at Conrad's writing style I'm kind of dreading Heart of Darkness, which means I definitely have to read it before I go back.

I have also been reading Ayn Rand's Atlas Shrugged and have been HOOKED. It's been quite a while since I got so engrossed in a book. Have any of you read Rand? Originally, I was going to make myself read it so I could write an essay to submit to a rather impressive sounding scholarship but to my boundless surprise it turned out to be fascinating, despite being almost violently secular. Rand creates a new morality driven by money and humanity. As a philosophy I think it's impossible but as a story it's riveting. As a story I think it's marvelous.

I'm only halfway through the book, but I think it's my newest favorite book. I'm really intrigued! The characters are surprisingly black and white but there are so many polar ideas/people/principles/factions etc within its 1200 pages. Like I said, money drives the whole story, but Rand is, of course, an ardent free-market capitalist and she imbues her good characters with a deeply capitalistic, humanistic bent. So the major characters are all business tycoons that all of the other people abhor because - in the "age of the heart" as opposed to the "age of reason" - they want to make profit for themselves, not to help the better good.

It's true, Dagny Taggart and Henry Rearden are working for profit but their idea of profit and money isn't just wealth but the big picture - they make money because they are the best at what they do, and they take an almost savage pleasure in efficiency, value, competence, intelligence, worth. They make money as a matter of unyielding, inflexible principle (and what they do is very important because it drives the whole economy. I think Rand's point is that to make money DOES help the economy.)

And I know that pleasure in doing your job well, because it is what you are meant to do. I've begun tutoring an 18 year old friend in remedial English and I'm good at it. She can't spell, she doesn't know what to say or how to organize her thoughts - but...there was engagement in her eyes yesterday. It wasn't there last week and it's like getting drunk on words or music, realizing that God has given you a gift, and you know what it is, and you love it because it's not stagnant - as soon as you use it it starts moving on its own. I'm really excited about teaching!

Anyways, that's enough Rand-flavored ramblings :P. I'm only halfway through the book, but I had to return it to the library and there's some kind of conspiracy going on because the closest three libraries have every single copy checked out and even online, it's jumped several dollars in cost. I ordered it from half.com and I can't wait till it comes :D.

Piano is coming along nicely. I had to stop lessons last year when I left for college, but I've picked it up again over the summer. I'm learning Beethoven's "Moonlight Sonata," Bach's "First Invention," Tchaikovsky's "Soldier's March," and Kern's "Long Ago and Far Away," which is from the 40s.

Writing! I wrote a short story I'm really proud of and I really want to share it with you, but I'm thinking of entering it into the short story contest. I'm not sure if I will, but I will definitely post it eventually. My sister and I had been writing a story together and I got an idea and it just spun off from there :D.

By the way, my sister is doing crazily well. She's all of fifteen - and getting into speech and debate and community college classes and she is SO SMART. She wants to, too, it's not just my mom pushing her.

((to be continued)) ]]> andave_ya https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?10727-Atlas-Shrugged-and-other-tales A recalcitrant character https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?10475-A-recalcitrant-character Tue, 01 Jun 2010 02:21:22 GMT I realized some things about myself while I was at school. First, that I write well. Secondly, that I don't write enough. To that end, I decided that I was going to work on an original story.

The plot's been percolating in my brain for a loooong time. I've got the first couple chapters planned out, and ideas for further on. I've even got the starting set of characters planned out - except for one. And she, of course, is the main character.

So far, all I have is that she's a skeptical scientist type. That would be enough - but I can't hear her voice, and I don't dare start writing until I can hear her voice. I know what she's going to do, but she's refusing to cooperate. I do hope this doesn't mean she's going to be stubborn.

I'm toying with the idea of giving her a non-generic ethnicity. In other words, not American or British. It would mean having to be really careful about keeping her in character, but at least she'll have a very distinct voice.

Hm. ]]> andave_ya https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?10475-A-recalcitrant-character I have a horrible confession to make. https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?10429-I-have-a-horrible-confession-to-make Thu, 20 May 2010 18:57:02 GMT I'm bored. In spite of myself.

It's weird coming back home only to find that you are the only person who has changed. Everyone else expects you to pick up where you left off.

I'm happy to, but it's boring. There is insane loads of housework needing to be done at all times. Mom takes Leah all over the place (that kid is so smart!!) and I usually tag along so we're pretty much going like this: :willy_nilly: all the time.

I've been doing lots of reading for next year's Western Literature II class. So far, I've read Six Characters in Search of an Author, The Death of Ivan Ilyich, the Metamorphosis, and I'm finishing up Frankenstein. I was so excited to buy all these books! I need eleven for a single class - and I owned only two of them already. I got some gorgeous books. Some of them are a little bit eerie.

Frankenstein

Metamorphosis This was really just a weird book.

Crime & Punishment
AAAAAAHHHHHH so cool!!!

But I miss the late nights spent sprawled on my bed with my computer, researching. I feel like I'm actually accomplishing something over there, getting stuff done, making progress. Here, housework is always useful but I can turn around and the dishes will need doing again.

If only there was some way to pack up my family and transport it to Virginia :D. Best of both worlds.

But I don't really want to complain. Did I tell you I have an amazing life? :biggrin5:

I seriously love my school. I finally got A's with Spinney - on both a paper AND a test! Can you say flabbergasted? It only took me three papers before I got an A on the fourth. And Western Literature I was gratifyingly easy. My literature professor, by the way...
ok, he's a stereotypical literature professor. I kid you not, they exist! I've caught him wearing mismatched socks in class. He let us have class outside twice! When he sits in the chair, he sprawls out across it. He closes his eyes when he's talking, too - it's a little unsettling. And he has this weird habit of reaching across his head to hold his ear with the opposite hand.

He also has an explosive laugh :D.

Dr. Hake also spearheads Lake Bob day. Lake Bob, for the uninitiated, is the retention pond we have on campus. It's gross, it smells, and the biology classes have performed experiments in it that show that there are all sorts of bacteria and viruses in it. It's not the prettiest thing. But once a year, at the end of classes, Dr. Hake and others set up a zip line where you jump into the pond. He sets up boat races and music and open mic and a slip and slide to celebrate the end of classes and give students a breather before they dive into finals.

IT WAS AWESOME. It stanketh mightily, but my roommate made me walk into the lake (I did NOT jump into it!). It was disgusting!! It squished underfoot. It squished fiercely. And the mud that splashed up onto me - it GLOWED.

And after my roommate dived into the lake, she had to come and hug me.

Gross.

Then we had the harmonicomedy - our semesterly event where people either sing or do some comic act or something combining both. Last Lake Bob day, we had just had our student elections, so the guys in charge made a spoof video. Here it is: Election Parody
By the by - the place they're running is actually on campus and the suits they're wearing is just a bit over business casual, which is required from 9-5. The different people you see in the video are all campus people, professors, professors children, and there's even Purcellville mayor! :D

:D After I get my computer fixed up, I'll post pics too! ]]> andave_ya https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?10429-I-have-a-horrible-confession-to-make slightly annoyed https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?10223-slightly-annoyed Sun, 18 Apr 2010 01:30:41 GMT :rant: It bothers me a whole lot when people complain about their classes and homework load. This is what we came to college for, people. We were... :rant:

It bothers me a whole lot when people complain about their classes and homework load. This is what we came to college for, people. We were repeatedly warned that this is what we're getting into and we chose to come. And frankly, the more you complain the more you'll hate it, and the more you hate it the less you'll get out of it. And considering how incredible the quality of the teaching and the professors are here and how we're changing and maturing and what we're learning, it is your (considerable) loss. So toughen up. Pay attention. DON'T gtalk in class, or you'll totally deserve the low grade you got on your paper. This stuff is interesting - IF YOU LET IT BE.

:rant: ]]> andave_ya https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?10223-slightly-annoyed hey all https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?10187-hey-all Sat, 10 Apr 2010 00:47:47 GMT I thought I'd write a quick update while watching New Moon with my roommies.

Truthfully, New Moon's kind of pathetic so far. Bella ruins it. If only she had more backbone...more color...more SPICE, goodness gracious! I don't know; it seems like Twilight brings out the feminist (that I didn't know I had) in me.

Sooo, an update :p

Spring break is coming to an end, and one of my roommates and I have been apartment- and cat-sitting for one of the literature professors at college while she's off to Texas for vacation. It's been really nice (although, of course, I didn't get as much done as I wanted to. I'm kind of scrabbling to get a paper done before it's due on Tuesday.) and relaxing, although the plain truth is I'm tired.

I really hate this feeling. I love school and life and this is what I want to do the rest of my life, but a month away from the end of the year I'm tired and kind of apathetic, especially when it comes to being sociable. It's terrible, really,
I'm such a nerd!! But I'm tired enough that once I'm done with schoolwork for the day I'm pretty much done. I need break.

Thankfully we're almost there. I have, let me see, like 3 and a half papers, a speech, and finals and then leave for home May 13.

My 19th birthday is on the 29th! I got a card signed by the kids in my church for me.

Oh and I got an A- on a Spinney test!! I still kind of feel like this: :yikes:

Wahaha. My brain's fried. I'll blog when I'm back home. Have a great week!! ]]> andave_ya https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?10187-hey-all this is basically an unloading, so feel free to ignore :p https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?9981-this-is-basically-an-unloading-so-feel-free-to-ignore-p Sun, 28 Feb 2010 20:12:36 GMT hehe, there's a lot on my mind today, and I'm not quite sure how to put it out...

Next week is midterms, and it's going to be crazy insane. I've got three midterms and a speech (all of which I should be studying for/working on.). Last week went by in a flash -- I did almost all of my homework for it last weekend so that I could spend the time studying.

But then I got sick again. REALLY sick, and I'm still sick now and it's been more than a week. It's a bad chest cold, I think, and it's been wreaking havoc on me. I'm getting over it slowly, although it went to my ear (again!), which means it'll probably be another month or so before I'm really healthy again. It was terrible last weekend; I couldn't even make it through all three of my classes on Monday; i had to miss one of them.

And before getting the chest cold, I had just gotten over a cold. It was like this last semester, too, always sick.

I AM getting enough sleep, I promise. I try to get eight hours minimum. And I AM eating well--veggies and protein and iron and everything. And I take my vitamins. And I'm usually fairly laid-back so to chalk it all up to stress seems a bit thick. I don't have time to exercise, right now.

I never got sick so often at home. At first, we thought it was because of all the changes: food, weather (oh goodness, the weather. SNOW IS DEPRESSING.), people. But it didn't go away!!

So my mom shared a theory with me, and I admit it makes a lot of sense. Before I left for college, both her and I were afraid that the hardest part for me would be adjusting to going from having my own room to sharing it with two strangers. I'm the type of person that needs solitude to recharge and to be myself, no faces to present to the world.

I thought the crisis was averted, when I met my roommates, Carissa and Emma. They're wonderful girls, and I don't think I could have gotten better roommates if I picked them out myself. They're fun, sweet, and godly girls and between the three of us there's a good balance. I've learned so much from them and really thought that they were just right, so I could manage without alone time.

And honestly, I've never really felt a need to be alone, since coming here. But my mom's theory is that I really do need my downtime, and my body's telling me so. That's why my immune system's gone wimpy. The reason why I haven't felt especially in need of it is because I usually do force myself to do what's right. Basically, I can lump it, if I don't like it :p.

That trait has held me in good stead for my life so far. I think, though, that that's because I've never had to "lump" it for too long. It's not to say that I haven't been in some relatively tough places, but they haven't lasted long enough to really manifest themselves in my health.

But now, I'm in college. This is long-term. This will seriously make things harder for me. My parents are looking into investing into property here (which would make life easier for me, because then I would have down time) but we're still in very early stages - talking and praying. So I don't feel like that's something I can count on quite yet, although my roommates and I are already talking about our "Patty's Place." :)

But it's all right. There's nothing wrong with it at all! I feel like I can handle it, and come out alive and whole and hearty, and that no matter what happens life will be good.

Oh! It will be good. Because God is good. Because there's no need for ME to be strong--my strength comes from God alone. I wish I could make you feel what I feel! I'm held in the palm of God's hand, and He knows me by name, and He actually cares about what happens to ME. I mean, come on, I'm just a random college kid...except I'm HIS!

This whole time - until this morning, even, I felt like things were wrong between me and God. I knew He was there, He loved me -- but I hadn't been in fellowship -- I hadn't communed with Him, really and truly and on a deeper heart level -- in such a long time and everything felt wrong. I was approaching schoolwork wrong; I was doing it for the grade rather than for His glory. I knew it was all wrong, and I was praying and asking Him for forgiveness and to come and visit me with the Holy Spirit.

I didn't doubt Him - I've been His long enough to understand that He's still there overlooking things, but I wasn't walking with Him the way I was supposed to -- the way I long to. Life felt sludgy and sticky and just wrong. I've been His long enough that I can't separate myself - I don't know how and I don't want to - from who I am in Christ; it IS my identity and all that I want to be - but that communion wasn't there and I felt like I was cheating.

Until this morning. These past few months have been mad, and between getting snowed in for two weeks, getting too sick to go to church, and not getting a ride to my church I haven't been to my church for a month, I think. But this morning, my RA picked me up and we drove to church together and I walked into the building with a sense of relief, of getting back to normalcy.

As we were getting deeper into singing I began realizing that things were falling into alignment. It's a feeling like no other! Things realigned and all of a sudden that dull feeling in my heart was replaced with pure bubbly joy, like I haven't felt in a long while. Jesus again clicked into His rightful place: first and foremost in everything I say and do. I wanted nothing more to spend the rest of the day singing and praying (in fact I'm listening to hymns now). It was like thudding back into myself. I feel like I've woken up to a huge hug. I was standing in the back after a coughing fit and leaning against the wall and realizing that I was strong again - because God's arms were wrapped around me and I am resting in Him, my strength and my consolation...even though I don't deserve it. My God! The God that created the world...the Son that died and rose again...He did that for me, I who am a sinner, who can actually forget what it means to be His!

I wish you know what I mean. I wish nothing more than that many of you will someday experience this. I want tears of joy rolling down your face, just like they're rolling down mine right now. I want you to know my Jesus. I want you to have that objective standard. I want you to know the just God who does what's best for me, even when it hurts. I want you to know my Father.

"Oh the deep, deep love/All I need and trust/Is the deep, deep love of Jesus." ]]> andave_ya https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?9981-this-is-basically-an-unloading-so-feel-free-to-ignore-p On Watching the Snow https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?9830-On-Watching-the-Snow Tue, 02 Feb 2010 21:15:38 GMT What does it mean to watch the snow Slowly falling, slowly go Across the window, throughout the day Over the hills and far away? What does it... What does it mean to watch the snow
Slowly falling, slowly go
Across the window, throughout the day
Over the hills and far away?
What does it mean to watch a man
Forging ahead through peltering snow
On the through the valley, on through the way
Thinking of home all through the day?
What does it mean when home he has come
Home from his working, home to the sum;
Life is not wanting in measure or span
But isn’t complete without God the I AM. ]]> andave_ya https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?9830-On-Watching-the-Snow good news! https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?9635-good-news! Mon, 04 Jan 2010 23:39:18 GMT Hiya!

I'm disgustingly sick, sniffing and honking and looking generally shabby. I sound like Darth Vader. But anyways, I'm happy because:

*drum roll*

My scholarship to PHC is going to be increased, just a little bit. AND my GPA is 3.3, with a good chance, I think, of increasing next semester. I had to keep my GPA above 3.2 to get more scholarships, and entirely by God's grace, I did!!!

Incidentally, there's no other way that happened but by God's grace. I could NOT have done that on my own. Throughout all four months God has sustained me and blessed me and let me have lots of fun! :p.

I ordered most of my books for next semester and I am SO EXCITED. Over twenty books - and maybe three of them are textbooks. The rest are genuine BOOKS. Thankfully, I already owned a couple of them. Here's the list:

1."On Christian Liberty," a treatise by Martin Luther (which I had already read last semester).
2. Plunkitt of Tammany Hall, edited by William Riordan
3. The New Deal by Keith Conkin
4. Ethnic America by Thomas Sowell
5. History through the Eyes of Faith by Robert G. Wells. We started reading this book in Western Civ last semester and honestly, it's mind-numbing and dreary. I have my doubts that the author is a Christian too. Some of his stuff just sounds weird.
6. Pensees by Blaise Pascal. I doubt we'd be reading all of most of these books, but I will, eventually :p.
7. Wealth of Nations by Adam Smith
8. The Communist Manifesto and other Revolutions, edited by Blaisdell.
9. All Quiet on the Western Front by Remarque.
10. One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich by Solzhenitsyn. I read this when I was probably 14 or 15.
11. Aeneid by Virgil. I read this in its entirety last year.
12. The Discarded Image by C.S. Lewis. Lewis is on nearly everybody's favorites list at the college. I was awarded the C.S. Lewis Literature scholarship when I got my scholarship packet :).
13. Divine Comedy I: Inferno by Dante.Dr. Hake isn't picky about translations as long as they're good, solid, and unabridged. I have Dorothy L. Sayers' translation - do you think that's a good one to get started on Dante with?
14. As You Like it by Shakespeare
15. King Lear by Shakespeare
16. Paradise Lost by Milton (excited!!)
17. Don Quixote by Cervantes. I read this in its entirety when we were in Lebanon a year and a half ago.
18. The Clouds by Aristophanes
19. "Preface to Paradise Lost" by C.S. Lewis
20. Odyssey by Homer. I read all of it three or four years ago.
21. Canterbury Tales by Chaucer

Plus a few history textbooks.

So I can't stop praising God for His goodness to me. His love is written in everything around me. How privileged I am! I don't think life can get much better than this (though I admit to being bored without schoolwork threatening me.).

This isn't to say that PHC isn't tough. It is hard!! But it's just another way God has shown His grace to me. I don't think I've ever been under as much pressure as I was during my first semester. I missed my family, my church family, my friends, my cats, my home, my books, my room. There was a loooong stretch where I was sick with a cough, the flu, and a bad ear infection that made me rather hard of hearing. It climaxed at the flu - which was smack dab in the middle of midterms week :sick:.

So, let me tell you about my professors.

1. Dr. Rob Spinney, my US History professor. He wasn't quite my favorite professor, but certainly the one I admire and respect the most. His class was intense, but there was something special about really learning what made history move. Yes, America's history is short-but it's so very varied. From the Federalist/Anti-Federalist split to Jacksonian Democracy to the Emancipation Proclamation - there's quiddities, ingenuity, bravery, patriotism, and an irritatingly large influence from the all-powerful dollar. I'm a little shocked (and saddened) that such a prosaic thing as money can actually inspire people.
Back to Spinney. He's a great professor; a disciplined Christian and passionate historian. But tough. Strictly speaking, we didn't have to do much homework for the class. Read the lectures outside class, discuss them in class, three books, two papers, and three exams and a final. However, I think I worked harder on studying US History than any other class, and I still got a B. I've made it a major goal of next semester to get at least one A in his class, for either a paper or a test. Just to say it's do-able :p.
Incidentally, my sister played a massively successful prank on me, regarding Spinney.
It was over Thanksgiving break. I had stayed on campus because frankly, it's not worth spending all that money on flights for such a short while. So one night, when I got back from hanging out and playing games with some of the other people who'd stayed behind, I checked my email. It was around 11 PM.
I got a message saying: YOUR ACCOUNT HAS BEEN HACKED. I was this close to deleting it, but out of curiosity, I clicked it. Here's what I read:
Hey, Mary!

Want your deepest, darkest secrets to be made known to your esteemable, respectable fellow students and honorary professors at you beloved PHC?

Yes? No?

If your answer is yes, then, by all means, ignore this email. Press the evil little spam button that will forever confine me to an eternity of Popcornopolis and Hip Implant Alerts. But be warned - perhaps Spinney would like to read an email describing your infatuation with his "considerable biceps"? [NB: Spinney, by the bye, is a slight man in his late 40s. Yet his strength is legendary amongst the guys who use the gym. I'm a little weirded out; a muscular history professor defies every sense of stereotype I'd been looking forward to :p]

If you answer is - the highly desirable - NONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONO, open another tab, look for the best price on an airline ticket, and start packing! I promise Spinney won't miss you THAT much.
BTW, might I suggest Hotwire, Priceline, etc.

Just a suggestion.
I was FREAKED OUT. I was about to find something vaguely weapon-ish and creep to my closet, fling the door open, and whack whoever (whatever?) popped out of me. I was going to sleep with my roommate's knife on my nightstand. I was going to call security!...

Then a thought occurred to me. It sounded like my sister...especially considering that this hacker hadn't told me where TO go. I called my mom and she had this strangled sound when she answered my question: "MOM DO YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT MY EMAIL GETTING HACKED?"

And, well, whaddaya know, my sister had my password and decided to play a prank on her older, supposedly more sophisticated sister living clear across the States.

The joke was on me :p.

So, next professor: Dr. William VanDoodewaard, who taught History of Western Civilization. Dr. Doode is my favorite professor. Last semester was his first semester teaching at PHC. After our first class we all gave a collective groan, thinking that this dusty-looking, vaguely mismatched young thing with a droning voice would be our dullest professor yet. Especially considering how he much info he stuffed into the hour and a half he had with us twice a week.
But as the weeks passed, he loosened up. He started to make gestures. They started to widen till he was making great, excited flourishes with his hands. He started smiling more often, even giving a dry chuckle when a student cracked a joke, even at his expense. He began cracking intellectual jibs occasionally- on our final we were supposed to circle the name of somebody famous (I forget who). One of the choices was "Hilary of Clintonus." Even his voice started to dip and rise and flow as he told us of the rise and fall of ancient civilizations. Sparta and Byzantium and the Celts all spilled their secrets - but never more did his voice shake with passion except when he was talking about Christian principles and church history. I'm really excited about next semester with him. Incidentally, I got my highest grade of the semester with him.

Professor number 3 is Dr. Roberts, who's really young. He can't be more than mid-thirties, but he has his doctorate in philosophy and who knows what else. I took Logic from him (and despite getting D's on all tests that weren't curved, I got a B- in the class. I'm not really sure how that happened :p). He was a really nice, understanding guy, and was even willing to let me postpone my midterm till I was feeling better. Three times during the semester, he invited students over to his family's house for dessert. I got to go, and he has a splendid family. I'm fairly sure his wife's older than he is, and they have two adorable children; a hugely extroverted little girl and a very shy little boy. And a beagle :). One of the things I really liked about Dr. Roberts is his patience. He taught three logic classes three times a week, and in the first part of the semester especially, he had to go round and round with the students as we debated informal logic with him in an effort to score extra points on the homework. As there are a number of accomplished formal debaters at the school, that takes a massive amount of patience.

Fourth: Dr. Cox, my theology professor. Here's a strange individual. A more down-to-earth, kind, Christian man would be hard to find, but! I had no idea how to take notes. (and I got an A- in his class. I was expecting a C+ at best. God's hand was once again clearly at work.) He would give us a general outline of his lectures as well as assigned reading for each class. I filled in the blanks as best I could manage, but I always seemed to miss the important things on the tests - because he never seemed to dwell long on them. Two of the three short answer essay questions on the final were on the topic of food and of clothing begun as themes in Genesis. Thankfully there was a third option I was moderately more comfortable with.
His method of teaching was more anecdotal - and he joked and teased the male students mercilessly. Girls were off limits, unless they started it, and even then it wasn't more than gentle digs. But I rarely could ever figure out if the dig he have someone had some sort of educational implication or if he was bonkers. On top of that, he homesteads. He's a short, solid man who hunts (he has fierce looking pictures of himself with a deer hanging from a hook on his facebook.) Once, he trapped a fox that had been worrying his chickens. He killed it and tanned it and brought it to the final for us to see :sick:. Theology II next semester should be...interesting...

Fifth and finally - Professor Stump, my Research and Writing professor. However I've dealt with him in a previous blog, and I shall not be thinking of him again. The man gave me a writing complex. Prof. Stump - I got an 89 on a Spinney paper. THERE. ]]> andave_ya https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?9635-good-news! Catching up. https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?9560-Catching-up Mon, 21 Dec 2009 07:46:43 GMT Hey all!

It's been a while, hasn't it? I hope you are all well and happy. I am :). Life is good. I made it through my first semester of college. I'm a little wonky though. I'm really tired, and I didn't get in till midnight - which is 3 AM in Virginia. So between jet lag and exhaustion from finals and all that I'm still not entirely here. And I think I'm getting sick :(.

But I'm so happy to be home!! (or I will be, once I'm in my right mind :(). We're watching a movie now - Night at the Museum 2 - though my mom is asleep and my dad's halfway asleep. I saw this about a week ago, but they got it because I'm here, so I'm pretending I can't hear the siren call of my bed.

Finals ended on Tuesday for me. So I got home midnight Thursday after an uneventful flight, although I was stuck in the middle seat. I had one guy who seemed to be petrified of flying on one side of me and an Asian lady who either slept or watched tv on the other.

Bulletproof's changed a bit since I left. Grown taller and smarter and wayyyy wittier. She can run me in circles so badly it's not even funny :p. Friday morning, she had a Round Robin speech tournament, which is the last practice round before qualifiers begin next year. She's doing a speech on Lebanon and it's shaping up to be quite impressive :p.

So, life at PHC. In a nutshell, it's awesome. It is genuinely rigorous, but it's fully in line with the way I view education and knowledge and learning. And of course, with the scholar I want to be. I had some awesome professors (except for that dratted one with the paper) and I'm so excited about going on with them next semester. (I'll talk about my classes next blog because I'm too sleepy to collect my thoughts).

So night and day we work and go to chapel and to classes and run ragged - but it's GOOD! ]]> andave_ya https://www.online-literature.com/forums/entry.php?9560-Catching-up