Reflections on the puddle of life

Yesterday, when I woke, I found myself in a strange state of peace. It was like waking totally empty of emotion, nothing bad nothing good, into a state of acceptance. I had been dreaming, and in my dream an apocalypse was coming but I wasn't afraid. I was happy, grateful. Not for the end but for having had such lovely things in my life which made it worth living.

The dream I put down to a story in Ray Bradbury's The Illustrated Man which, if you read it, is very similar to my dream. But regardless of how it happened it did get me thinking about all the things I have to be grateful for, the things that make me happy. On the whole I'm quite a happy person. I think this is because I don't look to the future for my source of happiness, I don't have long, far off goals and dreams. Instead there are things in every day, every week that I look forward to. They're little things, and they'll probably sound really trite and silly, but they make me happy. I also don't really want for much, and by saying that I don't mean that as soon as I want something I go and get it, but more that there are not many things that I want. I also consider myself to be lucky. Life can be harsh and tough but on the whole I think I have it quite cushy. And I'm grateful for that.

So yesterday I spent a little bit of time writing some lists (because I'm in a listing mood, sorry) to remind myself, on those days when I feel a little less lucky and a little less happy, what I have to be grateful for. I thought I'd share. Don't laugh at me too much.

Reasons why I'm lucky

I'm in good health. Health, on the whole, I think is pretty important.

My family are in good health.

I have a lovely husband (he really, really is lovely )

I have lovely kids.

We're financially stable (I say stable rather than rich, we're not rich. We balance the books every month, just. We can afford to eat. We don't buy many luxuries, we don't eat out or have a new car or holidays or anything like that.).

We live in a stable environment. Well, maybe that's an understatement; where we live is really nice. Not fancy, or posh, but nice. The neighbours are nice. The neighbourhood is nice and clean. No bombs drop on us and we don't live in fear of crime or violence. Our local government representatives actually appear to work for the people and they make a big effort to make the town where we live a good place to be, and they seem to succeed. People care about the environment and quite a lot of effort goes into making people feel welcome and safe and cared for. On reflection, that's quite a big thing.

I have a job I enjoy. It's not the best or most exciting job in the world, but I like it.

I'm sure there are other things, but those were the big things, the ones that tip the balance in favour of happy rather than miserable.

Things that I look forward to

You could also say that these are the things that make me happy.

Getting a kiss of my husband every morning when I get up and every night before I go to sleep.

Cuddles. Anytime, any place.

Getting on my bike in the morning and realising, after about 2 minutes, that it's never as bad as I think it's going to be.

Getting to the train station and being grateful to be off my bike!

Arriving in work when no one else is in yet.

Doing a good piece of work.

Helping other people do a good piece of work.

Having a giggle with my work colleagues. Work is serious, but not too serious.

Lunchtime!

Getting on my bike to come home.

Seeing my kids when I get home. They're always smiling and I get big cuddles and they tell me about their day, which is always nice. Generally they have a happy day, a bad day is rare.

Reading with my daughter.

Tucking the kids up in bed at night.

Watching them while they sleep.

That hour of quiet which happens every day after they've gone to bed, when you realise you're sitting down for the first time since you got home.

Talking with my husband.

Sharing a glass or two of wine (some nights, not every night!).

Movie night. This happens every Friday night, when the kids get to stay up late and they pick a movie and we watch it. Okay, so we've watched The Empire Strikes Back roughly 45 times but it's still nice.

Pizza night (okay, it's true we're creatures of routine). This is Mum and Dad's movie night. Every Saturday night we have pizza (home made) and watch a movie or a series on DVD. We just finished watching Rome and we're about to start re-watching Battlestar Galactica. We've seen it before but somehow it still feels like the first time. It's a sign the memory is going!

Visits from my Mum. She comes about once a month and stays over. She really seems to enjoy herself, the kids love having her around ('cos then they can show off) and it's always nice to look after her for a change. She did a pretty decent job of looking after me.

Going to the library. Whether it's the Manchester Central Library, where I go by myself, or the local library with the kids, going to the library is always a fun trip.

Having a day off.

Sleep.

There are other things, but I'll stop before you get too bored.

What makes you happy?