the ocean always dreamed blue dreams

The wide sky leapt above me like a salmon
finding its way upstream
The wind gently touched my face
with the delicate and deft fingers of a blind man
I knew the seasons and how they changed,
a sure knowledge I wore with my skin
And I knew not hunger, nor hungered
for more than I had, until I lost it
My string of pearls, unknotted, fell,
and rolled this way and that
Across the polished wooden floor
And even though I could hear them
And scrabbled on hand and knees
To find them, my search was fruitless
And I sat as daylight faded from my eyes
And my fingers grew useless,
My body no longer fit the space I lived in
And what I felt did not match what those around me felt
I became useless and hung from the side of a building
Far above them
And they were no more to me than ants crawling over and around
One another in an ambiance of unthinking industry
I hung there until my arms grew rubbery and unfeeling
And I grew desperate to cling to this brick and mortar,
Fighting to keep the fragile connection
Until my days were spent in an agony of wondering how long I could hold on
I dreamt that I held in the palm of my hand
a small delicate and fluttering thing
breathing all the life I could not find and looking
at me steadily
suddenly I could not breathe for looking
at the thing of iridescent beauty that lay in the hollow of its neck
my eyes absorbed its beauty
I could see, then, a shard of light among the darkened clouds
And even as I looked and wondered at it, I could not help but think
That if this small pulsing fluttering creature were to fall from my so great paw,
Would I go after it?
Or would I stay, smitten by the sky?

Qimissung

(for Pendragon)