I'm boring
by , 05-30-2007 at 12:29 PM (1391 Views)
It's dark outside - and inside - and inside of me. My counselor/chaplin asked me how I was, and when I sent him the "Unhealthy Levels" of an Enneagram 4personality he called me up. No, I don't want to kill myself, but I don't want to live either. I don't want to breathe, but I don't want to stop breathing.
I'm lonely, yet I cannot leave my house except for work. It takes such effort to go out - unsurmisable effort - internal effort, which I don't have.
I've been listening to H.I.M (they do an awesome version of "Wicked Game") and Moonspell and The 69 Eyes because I feel connected to dark, romantic horror, Frankenstein organs, and vampiric mysticism right now.
I wish I were a nocturnal animal. I would live in the darkness, in the silence, under the high moon.



