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Silas Thorne's Journal

Small town karaoke bar, Southern China

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She walked in and the barman
called her sister
admiring the shape of her breasts
while he poured her a jug.

I'd already had a few
and the lights were too low.
She gave me a few more, she said,
'cause she liked my singing.

My friends were singing their own songs elsewhere.

Then after a few more,
I realised her hand was on my leg,
and she said 'I just broke up with my boyfriend'
and 'I know a place nearby that's fun'
and 'I want to make a new friend'.

And I saw it was too late,
the lights were too low,
the bar was empty and my friends were gone.
She quickly passed me a note with numbers on it,
and I quickly stumbled out, fell into bed,
throwing it into the wastepaper basket.

And the next time I went in, the barman winked
and made curvy breast motions with his hands,
and asked me how it went.
I smiled, and told him
it didn't go anywhere,
and bought a beer.

Updated 05-10-2009 at 09:09 PM by Silas Thorne

Categories
Poetry

Comments

  1. skib's Avatar
    Aah, Silas! You know my style!
    A story about a perfect gentleman, I say!
  2. PrinceMyshkin's Avatar
    I love the plain-speech of this and the economy. It's kind of a film noir: I could sense the smokiness of the bar, the girl's throaty voice.
  3. Silas Thorne's Avatar
    Thanks guys for the comments!
    skib,thanks, though I don't know if I'm a perfect gentleman...
    PrinceMyshkin, bars in China are almost always smoky... though she didn't have a throaty voice. And thanks, plain speech and economy was what I was aiming for. Just trying to balance ordinary speech on the scales as much as possible here.
  4. Virgil's Avatar
    So it was a true story. Skib, a perfect gerntleman could still take up an offer.
  5. skib's Avatar
    Could, but in his perfect gentlemanliness may or may not.
    (I had in mind a scene from the Tom Selleck movie 'Last Stand at Saber River' when I wrote that)