Personal Musings

It looks like my dad is dying. The doctor says that he is so weak that "scoping him" (inserting a probe down his esophegas or up his rectum) would likely kill him, and if it didn't, the surgery to repair whatever is bleeding probably would. Meanwhile, his kidneys are starting to shut down.

I don’t know what comes next. I used to think I knew, but I’ve pretty much concluded that we can’t know. I have no idea if there even is a God or not, and if there isn’t, then there isn’t anything else, either. Even that is not so bad, though. I mean, you didn’t miss what you were missing before you were born, and you’re not going to miss it after you die, if there is nothing more, you know? Still, if there is a God, then there might be something else, too. Whether it is a spirit world and we go to it immediately and death is only a transition, or whether it is a resurrection and we go to it all at the same time, sometime in the future, or whether it is something completely different, some form moving on, transcendence into a different kind of consciousness; if there is something else, I hope that Dad gets all the best that that something else has to offer.