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Having been one of the kids bullied in school, I don't things are really any worse. There are just new avenues for kids to use to hurt one another. The interesting thing to me about online bullying is that while it seems horrible, the majority of the world is never going to read anything bad said about you. Maybe I just have a thick skin, but I was never too affected by things. Sure it sucked, and it certainly left a number of scars, so to say, but I don't really see why the amount of attention that things get now. The biggest difference that I see is the kids who are doing the bullying are proving their lack of intelligence in doing so even more by being stupid enough to post videos of their poor behavior.

As a matter of fact bullying has gotten worse, to the point of school shootings, kid's committing suicide they call bullycide. it is creating mental health disorder such as PTSD, anxiety and the list can go on. i do not recall back when i was a child being choked by wire by a bully the first day of school. this happened to my son. out of the top 10 worts school shootings out of all of them their is one that ranks #4 as the worst due to bullying and that was Columbine High school. If you go to facbook and look what i had to go through with my family. i can tell you my son was the happiest boy in the world and now he is angry hurt and is in councling. the site is called STOP THE BULLYING!!. created by stacey dessler. as far as cyber bullying goes i think parents need to have their child's email addresses and need to respect their child's privacy but at the same time let them know they will be looking at their sites to insure that they are safe and looking out for their best interest. i have my son's email and i do check every now and then that was our agreement in order for him to get an email. i will also have is email address and password for his social networking to insure he is not being attacked on those sites. i have had my life threatend protecting my son from a kid who decided to do something against his wishes and without his permission. my son was there when i checked his email, as parents it is our job to protect our kid's.

While actually being physically assaulted is extreme and certainty a whole other can of worms than just name calling, and down right dangerous. I think there are two sides to this, it may be that the bulling is becoming worse than it used to be, but I also cannot help but think that in many cases, children are also quite frankly becoming emotionally weaker than they used to be. I think there is a lot more coddling of children, part of which comes from a change in prenticing techniques, and the new wave of just wanting everyone to feel good.

I think kids are less prepared to accept the plain and simple fact that not everyone is going to like them, and that there are mean people out there, and not everyone is going to hold their hand and pat them on the back and tell them what a wonderful person they are.

I think society as a whole is just becoming softer and less adapted to deal with negativity from other people

I can understand the coddling since the laws of child abuse have gotten more stricter kid's have now threatened to call the cops on their parent over spanking yet police agree that spanking is still ok just not going to far with it. I have also noticed parenting now a days has been lacking in structure and discipline. Kid's walk all over their parents and take advantage of them and pretty much run the house or say i am gonna do as i please and you cannot stop me. Bullying starts within the home and can be due to lack of attention mental abuse from a parent physical or several other factors. all i can say is they are looking for attention are making up for something they lack i also read on sites they are avoid facing up to their inadequacy.

once another child is bullied and pushed to their breaking point they bully back, i am seeing it in my oldest son and my parents and i are trying to break him if that habit. I myself was mentally abused growing up by a someone i would like to keep private but i have no self esteem and have been in therapy all my life. i on the other hand did not bully back i saw the flaws in my up bringing and decided when i had kid's things would be different. i am harder on myself then anyone else and due to the mental abuse i had gone through in my life when i show signs of weakness in my life i in my mind mentally abuse myself by the same words i heard growing up but as a parent i tell my kid's not to say the words that hurt me growing up cause they hurt and i try to give them positive reinforcement but at the same time i talk to them when they have friends who are not nice and i do not sugar coat anything. when they get old enough to understand then my parents and i will start teaching them that this world is not nice and that it can chew you up and spit you out if your not careful in you decisions or the choices you make in life.

I believe when it comes to kid's it is all in how you raise them and if you. i have taken lessons from how i was raised but i also changed some things that way my kid's were not afraid to communicate without getting in trouble and i think i and my parents have done a good job. I have only had a relationship with my parents for 11yrs now before i did not not i couldn't talk to them i was afraid to. my parents know how i want my kid's to be raised amd they still have structure and discipline and i did finally confront the person that took my self esteem from me. it hurt us both but it had to be done

I'll have to go down on the side that bullying has gone beyond name calling and a punch in the face since my school days circa senior year 1969. The prime bully years back then were grade 5-8 with a bit of an overlap but by the time I hit senior year it was rareer. By then kids move on to cars, girls, jobs etc.--but when my kids were growing up the fights seemed more vicious. I still remmeber having to pull my second guttersnipe off a kid he was wailing away on and unable (at that time) to stop. Since then he has done very well in the anger management area--boxing is well loved hobby of his. I have also noted from time to time that kids are no longer afraid to talk back and threaten adults hiding behind an assumed immunity from repercussion. The police (during the times I entertained them were almost always understanding and certainly cinveyed to the kids their behavior was unacceptable. Most of this was about 10 years back--my boys have grown and matured and am quite proud of them NOW and when they were growing frankly I wish I had been less strict and done more fun things with them but I made certain that good or bad they were loved and also they were always told WHY such and such was the way it is.

As to your self esteem issues I'm 58 and have come to the conclusion thta I wiull never be satsified with myself for a number of good and bad reasons and as much as I sometimes wish God had given me good looks and physical coordination to hit a baseball I suspect I would have gotten into even MORE trouble with those so-called advantages. With that in mind--my advice is to try to forgive YOURSELF for not being other then oyu are --then with that firmly in mind--FORGIVE others (whomeever thye may be) for having unrealistic and unreasonable expections of you. Then relax and accept some the specialness that is you and you alone and give thanks to your God (if you have one). For the record my parents were not nurturers in any way shape or form and I have of late been just accpeting that thye were not nice people and it was their hangup and lack of responsibility to do do better by me. It cost everyone but to let that be the focus of my life would be a tragic waste and I freely admit it occupies my attention since honoring your parents is a Bibical principle. Good luck.

As to your son--good luck and ry to remind him not to honor his enemies by lowering himself to their level. Such a cheap victory is unworthy.

Hopes this helps. Be at peace.

I'm sorry to hear about your son. I will still maintain that I don't think bullying is "worse" only taken a different face than it has in the past. There were still physical altercations and threats long before things were posted on youtube or sent through e-mails. I think it only seems worse to those looking in because it is so much more public.

The suicides and shootings were things that had happened, but with the media coverage surrounding them it also plants the idea into the heads of other children. I forget the exact name of the theory (it is normally applied to criminal activities, but being a social based theory I imagine it applies to other things as well) but the general idea is that the resulting media coverage of an event can in turn cause a rash of other similar events as well.

I'm not saying that it isn't the responsibility of parents to protect their children, but part of what they should be protected from is potentially damaging influences including media coverage of such events. I also realize that in the end there is very little that I will be able to protect my own children from such things. If you are different you will be bullied and you will be just generally picked on. I'm not saying it's right, and having been on the recieving end I'll admit that it made highschool horrible. I will say that even as an adult, I've been forced into admitting that it is just part of life. It isn't one of the better parts, but it is still a reality all the same.

In regards to your son, give him a little more credit. The majority of kids pull through being bullied just fine. Some of the mood change has to do with getting older, and some I'm sure is a result of being bullied, but I can personally say that you do get over it. I was angry and sullen all through highschool, and I reached the point where I was just a dark raging shadow of the happy girl I had been before that. I got over it, and it wasn't thearapy or my parents that helped me do it even though I had both. I finally just came to the realization that others poor behavior has no bearing on me and my self worth. I was better than theym, and I had the good manners and kindness to prove it.

I give my son credit more then you know but never in my life have i ever heard of suicide come from a elementry school childs mouth i had no idea he had any clue what it was. i was nieve, thinking only young adults and teenagers knew what that was. my boy's have 3 parents as they put it, we sit down and we talk to them and teach them to do right and teach then they have choices in life and they also have consequences to every decision they make in their life and that consequence could be a good one or a bad one depending on that choice they make.
i love my boy's with all m heart but, as a parent and what i have seen and the threats on my own personal life protecting my kid's from the school yard bullies who made it a point to show up on my front porch to cause problems. listening to the other parents in our same building telling me they get pushed around by these kid's and their kid's do too. i am sorry you can take it as bullying has not changed but it has. kid's have no respect now a day's and feel they can walk on anyone. my son is in therapy and was never in therapy before any of this happened to him. suicide is not a word a child in elementry school should even know, let alone how to do it. girls who like boy's should not be shoving them on the ground to get their attention or throwing their back packs in the middle of the road for a car to run over it and i have seen it happen to more then just my kid's. kid's are tiered of being bullied and pushed around and they are speaking out and now so are the parents. this is no longer something that should be ignored. cyberbullying is right up their with bullying. growing up i never seen security or police in my elementry or middle schools. i have seen it now and that does not make me feel very good inside. i don't know how that makes you feel.

my self esteem it is slowly getting better but the damage is done, i also learned from the mistakes of how i was raised and decided it was not how i was gonna raise my boy's and that is not how i was gonna have my boy's raised and u can bet your a** i made sure and make sure when i am around and the crap that got pulled on me growing up starts happening on my boy's i correct it real fast. communication is the only way i learned that my son wanted to kill himself and if i lost that through being raised in fear then i would have never known.